Tinder thread

Super-liked this slut and she actually swiped right. What should my first message be?

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>lol how much free food did you get? a whole buffet?

>I have absolutely no standards, please let me cum inside you
It's what you already told her when you super-liked that fat bitch

>bisexual
Gonna have to left-swipe that. Tell her it was an accident, or just unmatch her.

>liking a basic fat bitch with no personality
come on OP you can't be this pathetic

>bisexual
>those eyebrows
>cry baby
borderline or bipolar tee bee aych

I kinda think this isnt a horrible start to be honest

I don't understand normies. I can't just start fucking someone I don't even know. Especially when they aren't a virgin.

Where do you get your plastic surgery done at? It looks very good and Im interested in getting a scrotal lift

say hey how are you or ayy wassup (which ever one you think she would like more)
then if/when she responds ask for her snap chat

t. guy who has done this shit before

> Let me impregnate you and eat the fetus after it has ripened for 4 months in your fat belly. Give me strength.

>being non white in minnesota
>it's like 95% white up there

I was gonna say that, then I looked it up and it went down to 85%

Say thiccccccc ;)

Call her mommy and beg her to gib milkies.

This isnt a bad way to start desu

Tell her that she has nice tits.

You're welcome virgins!

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>fat girl angle
Don't fall for this shit, tinder is full of these fucking whales, their pictures look great and when you see them in real life they are basically fucking hippos. This has happened to me twice and mark my words, this chick is a landwhale.

Finding a girl that's a virgin and over 16 is like finding a unicorn, you might as well try and hit on your preteen cousins and then kill yourself when your family disowns you.

I'd rather die a virgin then force myself to fuck someone I'm disgusted by

If you keep this up you could go down in history as the proud and noble virgin.

I'm working on it. I also reject girls if they try to act bitchy with me at any point in time. Even if it's just once.

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see a 10 year old boy. The priest asks, "wanna fuck him?" The rabbi asks, "out of what?"

Dude I'm in Minneapolis. Wanna double team?

>This has happened to me twice
Did you fuck either of them?

I like where this is going. Keep us updated.

you don;t have to fuck em, just try to haggle a BJ. fat chicks usually give pretty decent BJs.

>Get tinder because I ain't getting any anyway
>Not ugly just not Chad, kinda sort and thin but more ottermode than skinny fat
>Have been told by A woman I'm hot/sexy/cute and I had already slept with her
>Open tinder
>80% of the woman are wearing those dress things (I don't know the name) that hug the leg in almost the exact same pose
>70% use a Simpsons/Star Wars joke though from the looks of it they wouldn't know who Al Goring or what the Trade Federation are.
>80% also mention something about dogs

I match with no one and I honestly don't even know if I am ok with that because they all look so fucking basic. The few that actually seem interesting makes me bad that they never swipe me.

I also look at the slutty one's instagram photo's and take screenshots to jack off to.