>neighbor grandma asks me to dogsit for her while she goes out of town >ok >go next door to get the rundown about where the dog's food is and everything >her grandsons are there >"Whos this??" >"i'm user, I live next door and i'm staying over to watch dog tonight" >"oh cool" >proceed to talk to grandma about taking care of the dog >grandsons are getting into trouble, stealing food out of the cupboards and getting yelled at >one of them comes up to us while grandma is explaining what pills to put in the dog's food. >looks me up and down >"you look like superman" >runs off
>getting predrinks at a girls house with one of her friends >"user... Are you stupid?" >"stacy was following you around campus for like 2 weeks straight" >"she want's to ride your dick" >no thanks >"you're such an asshole user"
>Be at club with a nasty pump >Multiple girls feel me up on dance floor, abs and arms. >Never happened before I got Jow Forums >Made every workout worth it >Massive confidence boost >Didn't end up getting laid that night >Fucked a girl I met that night like a week later
Christian Sanchez
this reminds me of an old mire >be out at electronic music club >be dancing alone on the floor >killing it >some drunk thot wanders up to me and holds out a rose >"is that for me?" >"tee hee idk" >take it and start dancing with her >she turns around and starts grinding on my dick >nothing like this has ever happened to me before >this is great >so confident that i feel like i could get naked and fuck this girl in front of everyone at the club >get so worked up that I lean down and full tongue kiss her >*record scratch* >she looks at me all weird >"sorry i have to go" >get sick for a week after that
DONT KISS CLUBTHOTS
Ethan Hernandez
>Go with friends to pool bar we always go to >Best over to shoot >Random girls walk past and pinch my ass >Constantly >It's getting annoying
Chase Phillips
>not pinching hers back What're you, gay?
Leo Lee
>Best over Bend over sorry. I'm retard
Joseph Flores
It's random girls and I'm an akward autistic bodybuilder.
Jaxon Reed
Well, for future reference, physical contact like that is a form of flirting and is a nonverbal invitation to come talk to them or initiate similar contact. Practice this, and you'll go from awkward autistic bodybuilder to a bodybuilder that occasionally has sex.
Thomas Baker
>walking down street >hear "you're hot!" >look around. don't see the person who yelled or anyone else. >car pulls up next to me >gay guy leaning out of window >"hey!" he yells, definitely talking to me now >"you're hot! you could be spiderman!" >I say thank you and they drive off
Did I just get catcalled? Was a huge confidence boost either way.
Henry Jones
Idk why girls get so upset over catcalls. No one's touching you or threatening you. I've gotten catcalled by girls and guys, and like I just say thank you if they're within earshot or just take the compliment and keep on with my day.
To be fair, some of the catcalls women receive are less flattering and more creepy. The spiderman comment is innocuous and kind of funny, but let's not pretend they're all that innocent.
Colton Smith
nightmare gif
Logan Fisher
>at a capea (party in the countryside with a disco and a bullfighting plaza, where you bullfight cows) >It was filled with friends and all the people i know >Ottermode friend discovers a pullup bar in the disco (it was just a pipe) >He thinks he's the strongest in town, duels me to a pull/chin up contest >I've been into cocoon for a while, accept the challenge >He does 10 pull ups and 14 chin ups >People gather arround to watch, impressed by that numbers >I do 16 pull ups and 18 chin ups >Friend telling me that my form was shit (went all the way down and touched the bar with my chest) while everyone was asking how i did it >Girls strat teying and failing, saying "wow user, how can you do so many ??" >Mfw they though he was stronger because he lokked ripped with abs >Mfw he's 1'83 60 kg an i'm 1'79 70kg, almost no abs and my arms haven't developed much, but my back ,chest and legs are huge
Anthony Clark
pullup mogging people at parties is the best
Evan Hill
Cont >That friens told me about he could bench 70 kg and deadlift 100kg when he was in 'murica >Told him that i was benching 80 and deadlifting 110, he told me that was bullshit >Fats forward a few months, he goes to the gym for the first time in a year >Tells me he failed at the 3rd rep with 60 lg on bench >Tell him that that was my warm up and could bench it up to 15 times >"Yeah, i'm just a little bit rusted, give me some time"
He's still a nice guy and all, but i think he has vigorexia
Aaron James
>70kg manlet and not even lean Skinnyfat lanklets doing pullups at a party is some of the faggiest shit I've heard in a mires thread. Literally no mires in that story, just you outdoing an even more dyel faggot, nobody was impressed.
In my car we always try to balance things out because we're a pretty feminist bunch. Instead of catcalling girls, we'll yell things like, "you're super ugly" or "no man who's ever had sex with you has ever really loved you", or we'll a girl's attention, then when she turns around and we see her face we go "EEEWWWWWW" and drive off. Smash the patriarchy boys.
Kayden Ortiz
against my better judgement, I have to admit that's pretty fucking funny user
Threadly reminder that mires don't mean shit unless you actually bed those girls regularly. It's like being unemployed and bragging that you get job offers thrown at you.
you forget what a mire is its literally someone admiring you. stop adding qualifiers
she was psycho
Ryan Baker
>Ostentatious displays of strength in public
Y I K E S
Joseph Cooper
I know what a mire is. Yeah, mire is a mire, awwww some strange woman thinks you are attractive, good for you buddy! But they don't mean SHIT if all you do is go home, brag on Jow Forums and then jerk off to shemale porn. Your defensiveness means that you are one of those guys who never actually have the balls to approach the women who mire you, get their number, schedule a meet and bang. No, you are just standing there, at the bus stop or where ever you get mired, imagining a life together with her and then you never see her again. And then you come here and post "tfw no gf".
Happened last month before i moved to another gym.
>went to the gym in the afternoon (not my usual time) >just me and four gym thots that looked like highschoolers >they are doing zumba or some dancing shit >i wait til theyre done, just walking on treadmill >about 30 minutes they stop and head to the changing room >i start preparing for my deadlift >i was doing a warmup lift when they passed by >one of them asks me what exercise am i doing >i simply say 'deadlift' with a blank expression >to my surprise they all sit on a bench nearby to watch me >heart starts racing >activate autism mode >put on my earphones, act like its all cool and continue with my workout >i can see them in the mirror smiling while watching, whispering to each other >pretty sure one of them is taking pictures or filming me based on the way she's holding her phone >looking good in the mirror so i dont really mind >hear them cheering me as i do my heaviest set >tfw i actually hit a new PR >i turn to face in their direction breathing heavily and soaked in sweat >do that gesture where you swipe your forehead with your hand and say whoo >hear them saying something but Hybrid Theory still blasting on my ears
Before they left they asked me to take a picture with them. Told them politely 'i dont know, maybe next time'. They were other people in the gym already and it felt weird taking picture with a bunch of barely legal teens.
>tfw only get mired by dudes Are girls just too shy/hide it well or do they just not care as much?
Elijah Peterson
Kinda weird mire, but anyway. >boss has a meeting with a big potential client >me and 2 other junior partners are sitting in >he presents what we can do for them >dude and his attendants look super bored/ pissed >at the end he says he'll probably assign one of us 3 to them for immediate/ small concerns if they sign up >meeting ends, they still seem pretty pissed >90 minutes later I get called in to my boss >oh shit what did I do >'Congratz user, they want you assigned to them. He said that you look like you take care of yourself.' >Apparently our new client hates fats, manlets, women and men that don't lift. Haven't had anything come up yet with them that'd require a meeting with their boss, but I think this might become a beautiful business relationship.
>at beach with gf >single girl sitting 20ft away >blonde, big milkers >gf leans in to speak in my ear: >"omg user, did you see that girl? She rolled over and stared at you for like 5 minutes." >tell her she must have just been looking in our general direction >"no user, she was staring at YOU."
please dont lie what weight did you pull? and do you look good?
Nicholas White
>me and ex girlfriend in restaurant in bali for lunch > in a singlet coz its humid as fuck >walk past 2 ugly girls at a table >both look at me and look back at each other and say " that much muscle is gross" > 5'10 80kg at about 14% > i lolled
Parker Lopez
>all high and mighty about 80kg bench threads like these remind me who really post here
I feel sorry for you. Must be a nightmare to think back to
David Howard
I’m the same weight as you and can DL 160 for 2 and I don’t consider it particular or go about telling people. Why are you bragging for unimpressive stuff? Lets get actually strong first
Chase Torres
>user goes through the library of human emotes he has seen in movies >chooses a seemingly applicable one and does it irl
Wowee
Christopher Roberts
I'm a 6' skinny guy, not really muscular but qt face
>4 in the gym, me, a buff gay dude, an older girl whose friend is the gay dude, a fat guy >Gay dude doing his swings, girl puts her yoga carpet and foam roller on the floor and starts talking to him >Takes the kettlebell instead of her stuff >"Sorry *gay dude name* I'm so distracted those days" >*gay dude at her* "It must've been those 20y olds here ahah" >She smiles, takes her stuff and walks out the weightlifting area embarrassed
Every time I'm at the gym she looks my way Should I approach her? She for sure is older, like in her 30s
Matthew Torres
I feel like all those stories are the fantasies of virgin narcissists.
>Fit blonde l work with, basically my oneitis in spite of qt gf. >Out on ex, commenting on recent lifts - Just did 160kg for 3 reps >"That's really good! That's probably because you've got the best ass I've ever seen on a guy!"
There's the mire, here's the kicker
>Right after this she heads to the field gym and comes back saying she's fucked her back up doing diddies >I've been swapping God tier massages for jack rats, topic comes up that l should give her a work over. She's keen. >I'm gonna be massaging her lower back/upper ass tomorrow after shift.
She has a boyfriend, I'm with my girlfriend for good reason. Thus will lead to autism, l know it. Malfunction incoming.
Jace Thomas
21, she looks fresh tho, probably could be my sugar mama
Asher Roberts
Delete this
God I hate those fuckers, living in Texas I got stung so many times as a kid
Try living in the Alps in Austria. You haven't lived if you didn't put your fingers in an earth wasp nest at least once while climbing.
Jace Moore
>Smoking with friend >Just took 4 dabs, high as fuck >In friends backyard enjoying weather and new garden >His mom comes outside >Mid 30's, wet dress shirt on >Notagain.jpeg >She asks if I could see her hopping out of the shower through the backyard window >"Uhhh not r-" >She cuts me off and says you guys are probably too high >"That's very correct actually, i'm stupid fucking high." >She laughs and says she needs to water her plants >She grabs the hose and bends over a pot >Jesus Christ, infront of me and her son >I turn away bc friend in backyard too, showing half assed respect, also too high to deal with mom >I tell him we should go to his room >In room >Friend exclaims "We need to get out of here." >"That was fucking horrible. I felt like I was in a fucking brazzers video." >Laugh at comment but also at how much his mom was being aggressively weird , but sexually >Friend tells me he can't tell his father about this when he gets back in town
kek only been working out for 2 months, another time before this she told me she wanted to rub her hands all throughout my hair but thats such a fucking jump to coming out in a dress shirt and thong.
I was dancing at a club and a girl started grinding on me and I didn't know what to do, went full autist mode. she laughed at me, I kept dancing and tried to forget it happened.
Ryder Allen
Cringe
Julian Young
>ohp day, pump is looking nice and delts are juicey >wearing a tight shirt cause i need self gratification >walk into grocery store for them sliced meats >pretty but older lady looks up from her phone, we make eye contact >she looks down quickly but looks up again >catch her eyes again >she looks to the side and back at me >catch her eyes AGAIN >she finally looks away for good and sighs I know its not much but feels good
Aaron Moore
>why does this sperg keep staring at me?
Nolan Martinez
DO IT, you faggot
Lincoln Lee
Mein negro, just recently started hitting 160kg for reps too, we're all gonna make it user.
Charles Fisher
>imagine living such a sad life that your only measure of success is whether you have sex
Mason Thompson
Are you white trash?
Benjamin Diaz
BTFO Shitskin.
Jayden Gutierrez
Come on now user
Brandon Price
You mean gtfo? Even if it seems you are 16 the mother of your friend had him at 20 at most for her to be mid thirties.
Conclusion: self-unaware underage faggot of low social class. Shut the fuck up and lurk more
Luis Sullivan
>not taking the pic this is how you go from sad kunt to sik kunt mate
Daniel Cooper
>says to lurk more but doesn’t know what btfo is reddit please go
Gavin Ross
Fuck of reddit spacing boomer
Zachary Lewis
>this amount of backpedaling pretending to use secondary meaning that is never used in comparison to blown the fuck out
This is just sad. Nothing I wouldn’t expect from a low born mutt tho.
Angel Bennett
>implying this board isn’t almost exclusively 19-19 year old boomers ISHYGDDT
Not him but, btfo means "Blown the fuck out", which makes no sense when you use it like you did. >Get the fuck out Shitskin. >Blown the fuck out Shitskin.
>the least of the whites, american mixmutts spamming shit memes to actual white people
God I hate summer underagefags. Especially mutts full of themselves. I am 100% sure you are under 18
Brayden Young
Normies think anything above 3 plates is impressive. Used to brag before when I did 4 plates at 190. Now I'm 170 and DL 460, no need to brag, just show off the gains.
I'm keeping it above board, don't worry. I actually just like giving massages, having given just about every dude l work with multiple upper back sessions. Shit wasn't even my idea today.
Julian Robinson
Im 156 5’10 and I usually end in 3 plate, never have gone higher though. 3 plate is ez
Jackson Martinez
>you could be spiderman Sounds like he's calling you a twink, senpai
Owen Collins
OP here, lol no. I'm 20, I don't know what kind of mental gymnastics you're going through but I'm sorry you don't have opportunities as such. Must feel bad to be unloved and without your balls as a "man". kek
Lincoln Wilson
spiderman is ripped tho
Jason Lewis
You need to eat brother. Got cat called when I was in Moncton, NB. Group of barely legal teens in a car shouted something at me and my brother. Felt Good man. Reminder, you don't even need to be that ripped for normies to think you are ripped lmao.
>get mires from some girl who works with a friend >says "you're so big" etc; >only been lifting for 9 months so not that impressive >she acts super interested in me
But I doubt it all because I facebook stalked her and her ex is easily 6'2" at 90kg+ and is way bigger than me,
Jaxon Morris
she wants to cuck you bro
Cooper Gonzalez
>But I doubt it all because I facebook stalked her and her ex is easily 6'2" at 90kg+ and is way bigger than me,
That is just retarded, user. She wants your seed, if you like her, give it to her.
>tfw lost kissing virginity last saturday >tfw everytime we kiss she bites her lip afterwards >tfw we make out and she places her pelvis against mine >tfw she moans everytime we hug
Feels good lads. Now I just gotta pass tomorrow's exam and it's officially a good year.
Connor Ross
Its almost like your sense of worth as a human being is determined by the number of women you fuck and even the suggestion that a man would not want to stick his dick in a psycho bitch for his own physical and emotional wellbeing is heresy of the highest order
not sure why people are into the swimmer body, the torso is long and wide while the arms are skinny. its just a disproportionate mess
William Nguyen
>work part time while studying >school end at about the same time work for me does >have to walk past 2 schools >get mires from schoolgirls >one makes a heart with her hands at me while riding past me >get basically catcalled by a group of them I don't know what to make of this. Girls my age would be great too.
