Mental Heath Fitness Thread

I live in an apartment at uni with people who don't like me, family is back in my home state across the country, and no friends.

The tread will be deleted soon but I'll post anyway.
Went to a work outing and even though I got a few jokes in and seemed relaxed I absolutely couldn't relate to anyone, felt like an outsider and again lost hope in ever not feeling like I'd prefer being alone whenever I decide to be "social" and sober.
I don't even want to "fit in", just find meeting other people less exhausting. I'll most probably die alone

Poorly. Turned 28 last week, still alone, still a kissless virgin, still poor and stuck in America, an awful country to not have money in; still dissociated where every day is a same blur, currently out of drugs to motivate me. I wish my friends viewed me as important as I viewed them. Eagerly awaiting the day I don't wake up.

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Ive been working full time but I'm still not happy. I don't care about money and want to do what makes me happy. Life is strange guys.

What makes you happy user?

Keep at it dude, 88 days sober here.

>be black
>heading to work
>beat up car doesn't work
>take the bus instead
>old middle eastern lady sits on the bench alone
>i sit on the same bench a little far away from her
>she stands up and leaves, walking towards the bus sign away from me

normally i dont bitch about racism n shieet, but this one hurt a little

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>out running errands
>see oneitis that ghosted me (twice)
>turn neck 180 degrees away from her as I pass as if my face and her are magnets of opposite polarity
>realize what a fucking spaz I must have looked like

Just waiting for the sweet release of death at this point tBh

Ever since I was a child I was interested in being an"inventor" and science ect.
Right now I just do industrial controls and mechanical engineer shit. My boss is making me help him design stupid shit I don't care about. I don't want his money.
I'm just venting I will be okay. We will make it one day.

Lol you should of called her a sand nigger

are you a girl?
put in the work like all those other ppl do and stop worrying about superficialities that you cant change; pick up a hobby or sport that you can dedicate yourself too
why arent you well liked with the people you live with?

gotta keep grinding until you're high enough to where you can pick your projects and role. it takes time but if you bust your ass you can make it faster. i bitch about the same shit all the time but i'm on the finance side. its up to us to get where we want to be.

You can't even spell 'health' correctly.

Would look very weird

He spelt it right.

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not too good, today is my first day back at the gym after a long 6 month break and i hate going to the gym. Honestly going to the gym ruins my mental health seeing all these confident dudes with their gfs and me struggling to put on proper muscle like my goals but being a skelly is too much shame to bear.

Literally had a mental breakdown after my workout and tried hanging myself in the woods but i used the wrong knot and couldn't take the neck pain, afterward i just decided to take a break from the gym and relax for once. Now I'm loosing weight fast and get depressed just looking in the mirror every morning so i have to go back the gym, hopefully i won't loose my mind again now I'm back at the gym.

i just want to stop feeling so lonely every fucking day.

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>old
>middle eastern

It's a culture thing desu, nothing against you. Don't take it personally.

I feel like I'm on a thin rope these days.
I'm doing fine by many metrics but I've got this mental issue thats been bugging me for quite some time, about 2 years maybe.
In several situations I just get extremely nervous, uncomfortable, jittery whatever you wanna call it. Those situations can be typical of those matters like waiting for a job interview (im about to graduate from a pretty good school with a good resume) , before a first date (im doing fairly good with women actually) or whatever. But the thing is this also happens in fucking normal situations! Like whenever I have to take the subway or bus for a couple stations, when I'm in class waiting to do a presentation. At those apparently normal moments I feel a flight response reflex coming up extremely strongly, I feel some sweat around my pubic area and the impression that I'm about to shit and or piss myself. It makes situations that I cannot escape such as the middle of a presentation a living hell. Although it never interfered with any of my serious goals it's corroding my day to day life.
I never talked about this to anyone, I don't know how it's called and I dont know who to see for help.
Any advice will be appreciated fellas

Thats what you get for being a nigger

Crushing depression in 3 days

We’re all gonna make it brah

youtu.be/jTIFSBlHzR8

That is a damn comfy picture

Sounds like anxiety. One of the most common mental health disorders.

Do some research. Find help. Therapy and medication can do wonders.

Home for the summer, a little bored and looking for a job. Broke up with my GF a couple weeks ago but I feel completely fine about it. The temptation to start /fraud/ing keeps growing.

It took me until 23, I wouldn't worry.

>are you a girl?
I am a man child

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This sentence gets thrown way too often these days but maybe you should learn to love yourself as you are?
I mean it sounds like all you want is a GF. Hate to say it but no one can properly be with someone who hates himself. So as naive as it sounds let me say this to you: you're yourself, nothing less nothing more. And you're okay. Not the best, not the worst. Getting those muscles would be nice if you wish for it, but that won't automatically make you happy.

You know what? Go out and volunteer sometime. At an orphanage for example. Maybe you don't have any muscles but you can be a hero to these kids. It'll make you feel great about yourself.

you should enjoy reading more kierkegaard then.

meh
i am 28 years old and currently make about 25000/yr. i don't drink or do drugs, don't play video games, and i am decently fit with pleasing aesthetics.
i haven't been in a relationship in 5 years. i was hooking up with a girl a few months ago who i hoped was interested in a relationship, but she ditched me on my birthday to do idk what and i haven't heard from her since. i don't think i misread her or the situation too badly, but i was optimistic when i shouldn't have been.
i don't really socialize very much. i don't have much in common with anyone i meet and i'm kind of awkward.
my baseline mood since getting started with self-improvement 2 years ago has not really changed. i still feel like garbage most of the time; the difference is i don't get as much relief from it through drugs and alcohol anymore. i don't know if it's my fault, or if the world we live in is so god damn intolerable that the only way to put up with it is drowning the senses.

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It's hard to love yourself when you've got aspergers and can't hold a conversation with 95% of people you meet especially women

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I miss her, bros.

I get you man, as a younger guy I had similar issues. Since then I've been with more women than I can count. They won't make your happiness. They may perfect it, but first focus on yourself.
Ask yourself what makes you happy? Then ask again and again, then act upon it. You're your only savior, but luckily you also happen to be the most capable being to save yourself

Who is she?

Met two chicks in same week
Spent some time talking to them and getting to know them

>ghosts me day later
Figuered out all women get attention from somewhere else easisly...

I don't compete and don't have time for games at all

don't think I'll ever make it

Gf of 5 years that dumped me.

Sure it could be her being racist n shiet but there's also a number of other reasons.
Best not try to read people's minds, it'll drive you insane. Unless they explicitly say, give them the benefit of the doubt.

any reason?

She said I depended too much on her too much. And I do agree that I had problems being my own person and that I need to become a more independent person.

But that doesn't stop the fact that I miss her more than anything.

Increased test is turning me into an asshole. I started being a complete dick to my brother and his friend today, for no reason, just being aggressive and confrontational.

Turned you autistic lol

dude im high af and that made so much sense

Meh, it could go either way... though most would evaluate me clinically at this point.
>Jow Forums for 10+ years
>agree
>Jow Forums for 5 years
>the sticky is bullshit
>fucking a hightrest aryan braphog
>she had webbed toes
>try to figure out if Hitler would be angry
>fuck other chicks
>half german / half mexican
>tell myself she's "white enough"
>know she isn't
Think I've mentally left humanity behind, I think I'm going to do drugs and start doing steroids.

rip my past self

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If only you Jow Forums anons understood the significance of these dubs.

Thank you Hitler, thank you.

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sucks man, you'll get through it. Focus on yourself, get huge, and find a better hoe

HOLY SHIT DUBS AGAIN.
I think I'm impregnating waterworld braphog tonight.

Dubs confirm once again... fuck me brehs... guess I found the one.

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You're reassuring your dominance.

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Business as usual? The crash isnt supposed to happen unless you take it repeatedly over a few days. First time.

I'm great other than the fact that I don't know how to talk to women

I'm so angry. I'm exhausted, and I always hurt. I'm angry with myself and I'm angry at God. I'm angry with myself because I am 20 years old and i can't fucking remember 2 days ago, and i can't think about or visualize tomorrow. How am I to advance in life if I don't learn anything because I can't remember, and I can't plan anything because I can't visualize the future? I Don't understand anything anymore. I just can't process anything, I don't know if I'm overwhelmed or if I've just slipped. The only thing I desire anymore is death. I beg God for death regularly. And this is where my anger with God begins.
>God put me here for some reason
>he won't tell me what that purpose is
>he won't let me die until I fulfill it
>but he won't tell me what it is
Also
>God's fair and just
>lets people wrong and harm me
>does nothing to protect or avenge me
>seems their life gets better
>I take matters into my own hands
>backfires and fails and I am punished
>suicide and I will be punished
>suffer at the hand of others with no justice in this life
What the fuck do I do? How do I stop being this negative? How do I let go od this victim mindset?

work on improving your face.
that's the most important advice.

I'm trying to focus on myself more.

But she keeps me in limbo. Sometimes she still talks to me about her feels and about maybe wanting to get back together someday, but then she'll also completely ignore me for days.

I have been so undisciplined and I have no idea how to change. Been eating like crap, not going to the gym, not studying and so on. Please help

Intellectually reduce them to objects of amusement.

>Last semester of engineering degree, turn into a high functioning alcoholic and gain 40 pounds
>Fattest I've been in a while
>Graduated college and waiting for job to start in 9 days
>Moving out in a week
>Staying with my family is literally driving me insane.
>Work to keep busy around the house fixing shit and painting, but every time theres down time I feel stir crazy and cant wait to end it all
>Only redeeming thing is I'll get a 10k sign on bonus and will use it to buy a used lexus and squat rack at the new place.

Its a hard pill to swallow but see them as non equals and they're easy to talk to. Would you fuck your best friend in the ass? Exactly, so they're not your friend.

Step 1: Google Joran Peterson.
Step 2: Clean your room.

Screenshot this and make a new thread for additional steps.

You need to completely ignore her or block her
>ex breaks up with me
>wants to be friends and still talk regularly like we were when we were dating
>"nah, I don't do friendships with exes"
>ignoring her made her want me more than she ever did
>do FWB for a bit, wouldn't even call her a friend, just a fuck buddy
>she wants to get back together at this point
>"no thanks"

The more you ignore them, the more they want you. Women live for attention from men, don't give it to her. She is just another whore and is using you. Don't give her what she wants, your attention.

Jordan**

8/10 redpill
Can you explain why?

I will try this

I fucking tired
All the screaming about politics in life now, all the uncertainty of the future, all the anger that is hidden and just all of the nonsense of life has worn me out. I can't even make a friend without them talking about the president these days, meanwhile i'm just trying to chill out and talk about random shit. Can't even talk about video games anymore with a screaming contest over socio-political issues. I just want peace from all of the fucking madness and yet i need to unwillingly take part in it just to have a fucking conversation.
I have now secluded myself into books and self improvement just to say sane

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I used to be super fit from around 16-19, then I started smoking cigs and quit lifting. I'm 23 now. Last few years I have started to develop schizophrenia too. I got on Zyprexa (which seriously helps) but I have gone from 180 to 215 at around 5'10. I carry it pretty well but I feel like a fatty. I certainly don't get mired by chicks like I used to (haven't had sex or been with a girl since I was 19 either). I just want to be young and healthy again. I feel tremendously less confident than I used to. Have any of you guys rebounded from getting out of shape?

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You should fucken kill yourself because political issues are actually very important to everyone. What gives you the right to not give a fuck?

Thanks man.

I guess if she really does mean it when she says we can maybe get back together someday then I'm going to make her come to me.

Im focusing more on my lifts and doing well in my job. As well as getting back into hobbies I didn't really have time or money for anymore when I was with her.

I'm probably just going to block her on everything because I don't trust myself to not respond when she tries to talk to me.

Finally, a place I can actually tell the full story to.

>Meet girl a year ago, beautiful and engaging, go on a couple of dates and hook up a few times
>accidentally knock her up
>she goes full crazy but has an abortion
>we start talking again and dating
>start getting closer, summer goes nicely
>somehow, even though she is on birth control, she gets pregnant again
>starts going into meltdown mode again, I stay with her, miscarriage after a month (so basically a messier period)
>surelythiscan'thappenagain
>continue dating, things get more serious, end up asking her out and she officially is my gf

cont.

She straight up said she broke up with you because you are too clingy. Women don't want a man that bends over backwards to do everything for her. They want a strong individual with his life in order.

It's a hard balance. If you give her 0 attention, she will eventually just move on and get that attention from someone else. But ignoring her gives off the idea that you are better than her and don't need her which just makes her want you more.

Men lead, women follow. Not the other way around.

>pregnant again (I have been pulling out this whole time and she says she is taking birth control, idk if she ever was taking it correctly)
>she doesn't tell me and we continue as normal, has an abortion and then tells me
>I tell her we need to use condoms because this is ridiculous, she freaks out and says we aren't having sex if so until she gets an IUD

This part is a little understandable, I had told her early on that I can't keep it up wearing a condom so she probably felt I would leave her if I had to start wearing them. At the same time she should have had the self respect to cut off sex until she got alternate birth control.

>I want to hold off on sex but she is already emotionally imbalanced and I feel our relationship is on the rocks and in the moment I'm selfish and she wants it so idk
>gets pregnant again a week before she was going to get an IUD, I had given her plan B and we tried spermicide in the meantime, which was shit
>this period is terrible, lots of fighting and meltdowns, I want to leave her but can't because she is pregnant
>another miscarriage
>we stay together but there is some distance
>she doesn't want to get the IUD until we go on vacation so she doesn't bleed while on it
>we go on vacation
>turns out she's pregnant
>she is talking about keeping it and how she can't do it again

cont.

damn dude I feel you, I'm just trying to live and enjoy life and everyone just brings it back to politics somehow.

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>She has a few episodes with me and I see a side of her that seals the deal, I can't stay in this mess
>Tell her I am leaving, going on a break, for full disclosure before she decides to keep it or have another abortion
>lots of back and forth but I hold firm
>a few weeks later (last Monday) I tell her I am going to officially break it off and that she needs time and effort to fix her mental and emotional issues, that I am willing to support the baby if she chooses to keep it
>She still loves me, but says if she keeps it she doesn't want me in their life
>tomorrow is the last day she can have an abortion, she has one scheduled and I don't know if she is going to do it or not, she said she was torn when we last talked

The year feels absurd and I don't know how I got to a point where I was delusionally believing we could sleep together and it couldn't happen again. I've honestly lost a big chunk of my personal morality and I hardly feel things. Towards the end she would weep and beg and plead and I felt nothing. I don't know why I was too selfish to stop or hold firm on condoms when she had a meltdown over it, or why I stuck the relationship out this long, but it is what it is. I could be a dad next January at 24 years old.

There's a time and a place for it, and me having lunch with a person is not the time or place

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>can't even get a reply in a depression thread
WHY CAN'T I DIE

What gives you the right to not give a fuck?

Yeah breh, took a year of cocoon mode though.

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Pretty fucking bad desu. Being forced to go to outpatient mental health program at the hospital for 2 weeks because the courts substance abuse program thought I was suicidal. Even though I just got out of 3 months of inpatient for that. I dont relate to anyone and group therapy does nothing for me. Ive been pretty open and honest in group and actually putting in effort, but it still just does nothing for me. On top of that one of the females there likes me and is trying to be my friend (or more) and I really dont want to go anymore because of it. I told everyone in group how I have no social life and dont talk to anyone and dont really like people. Right after that she came up to me asking if I have facebook or snapchat or anything and tried talking to me. Obviously I dont have social media bitch I just said I dont socialize. Very next day she gives me her number telling me to text her and is trying to hang out with me outside of the hospital program. Shes always talking about how lonely she is in group and how her goal is to be married one day. Really dont want to go in anymore because of this, but I have too. 8 more days of this shit bros. How do I get this female to leave me alone (she has 7 days left too) without being an asshole? And why the fuck do they think its a good idea to put a schizoid or autist or whatever the fuck I am in group therapy? I was talking to the director of the program on the first day and I could tell even they knew I couldnt get anything out of group therapy. I feel like Im too far gone brahs.

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Sure it is the Revolutionary War was planned in a bar.

Haven't had a problem with my depression since I started getting fit a few years ago.

Learned to recognize when I'm falling into angry, oppositional and obsessive behaviors so I can short-circuit them.

Learned how to structure my time and accomplish much more in any given week instead of playing TF2 and eating OMAD.

Been maintaining a healthy heterosexual relationship with a relatively stable schoolteacher with a fat ass. We'll be going to the gym together this weekend, where I will approach her about getting fit.

Finally cleaned out all the junk that's been in my bedroom for years. Everything is clean and organized now.

In other words, I have literally never been better in my entire fucking life.

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I thought about responding as well. But what is the point in telling yet another bunch of people your depressing depraved thoughts that have been haunting you for 10 years?
What is the point?

I wanted to join the army, and now that I'm about to go in I realise being a firefighter would have been so much better

Fug

Yes. I used to be in shape around age 18-19, then stopped working out or eating healthy all together when I got a gf. Broke up with her after 3 years then spent nearly two years drinking myself to sleep everyday.

Then I stopped drinking. I was starting to get man tits. My gut started blocking the view of my dick when looking down. I was getting disgusting.

Been working out every other day for a couple months and eating clean. Feeling better than I ever have in the last couple years.

Now is a good a time as any to bounce back and become the best you.

We're all gonna make it.

I listened to one Fleetwood Mac song and now that's all I get recommended.

I want to die

bro it's not that I don't care, it's that at the end of the day your political opinions don't mean shit to anyone. they effect you and only you, and talking about that shit constantly is stupid cause it's basically naval-gazing

Trying to build up the courage to contact this girl before she disappears from my life.

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How do you short circuit those behaviors? Please tell me

Wtf that's easy cause if she leaves and you fuck it up, nobody will care.

You're right, just need to think of something not retarded to say though.

Good for you user. Keep it up!

Not good. I'm realizing that I'm never going to stop being a fucking bitch ass.

>spend the last 3 years getting Jow Forums
>cardio every day
>gym 3 times a week
>best shape of my life
>literally morphed into an easily hot mid-30's guy from a lte 20's/early 30's rubber armed fat ass
>been on a few dates here and there, fling type shit, nothing serious
>year ago start noticing woman at the gym
>physically my type in every way imaginable, of comparable age (I think) very attracted to her
>want to talk to her (and would have no trouble doing so under different circumstances,) but can't because of this whole "don't approach women at the gym" bullshit going around
>the feeling gets larger every week that goes by, and I've made such a damn thing about it in my head that any move I would attempt to make at this point would end in disaster anyway

It's not fucking fair. I'm a bitch ass because I can't get the fuck off it, not because I'm unable to talk to women. "Not the appropriate venue." It's getting to the point where I'm ready to switch my fucking days (she's always there when I'm there.) Every other area of my life is populated with women I have no fucking interest in whatsoever. This is bullshit. What's the point of being Jow Forums if you can't stop being this much of a faggot?

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Self-hate cutting real deep desu.

My interest in fitness is motivated by this really deep seated guilt I have from cheating on my gf a few of times back in high school.

I was just a piece of shit and didn't care at the time, but it caught up with me halfway through college and since then I've been trying to basically kill or remake myself in every way I possibly can short of suicide. Just want to disassociate from the piece of shit I was as a kid, and the person I would have become if I kept up that way.

Started going to church, working out, trying to discipline myself and be a better person. I know I've made a lot of progress but years in there's still a long way to go and I tend to make it really hard for myself just by constantly hating on myself and thinking about what a piece of shit I still am. Also I don't really have any friends willing to work out with me so I tend to go really hard on myself alone and end up injured, setting me back.

It's really unpleasant and probably unhealthy but it seems to be working.

I'm thinking hard about joining the military and as such have been doing a lot of cardio and honestly it's making me feel a lot better. It makes me happy. I don't know if that's good or not.

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