That dreadful feeling when you realise you are all alone and have no one to talk to and every thought is caged in my...

>that dreadful feeling when you realise you are all alone and have no one to talk to and every thought is caged in my head and there is no way to share it with another living human and no matter what ido, no one will give a fuck and unlike in my japanese animes, no one will just show up to save me from the solitude

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dump your thoughts here my man

fuck you i didnt ask for this feel. Honestly, why not break the fucking system since no one cares about you anyway.

I know exactly what you mean
>tfw a mix of sleep deprivation and isolation causes you to imagine someone helping you out of the rut, then for you to realize that it's an illusion, and everything continues

Get a dog. He can't understand you, but he will be happy that you talk to him. He will also make you go outside more and he will love you unconditionally.

it's a terrible feeling, isn't it?
not everyone can get along with people though. it's better to accept it now and seek comfort in escapism.
t. someone trying to make a lot of money so they can afford a vr headset or whatever.

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I was at music concert yesterday and didn't notice a single person, but me, who was there alone.

>it's better to accept it now and seek comfort in escapism
>tfw anhedonia fucks you so bad, you literally can't enjoy even watching a movie or playing a vidya

I see people lonely around here all the time. They want to share their thoughts and relate to other people, I suppose. I don't relate to other people but I can see the sentiment I guess. I just don't see the point overall. I don't get anything from communicating with other people except for more problems. When I'm alone, life drifts by very nicely. I don't feel any dread about it, I'm just waiting for death really. I don't see why it's anybody else's business what I'm doing or feeling? I don't care about anybody else, so why should they care about me? I never understood the "misaki" complex or why people feel loneliness. If I was the last person on earth I strongly believe that I'd feel a lot more happy and relieved in every single way.

Sometimes i imagine myself accidentally meeting a girl a had a crush on 9 years ago, who had cut off all connections with me 7 years ago because she hated me for how pathetic i was. I imagine talking to her and telling how i changed since then, i can even be considered successful among normalfags, excluding socialisation. But then i remember that me imagining it is a proof that i haven't changed at all.

I don't really like animals. When i imagine myself with a dog, i can only think of inconveniences i'll have to deal with.

I like to sing songs, when i'm alone at home. But only with headphones on, so i don't hear my voice. I always play the actual song, preferably with female vocal so i can imagine myself singing together with a gf. Or sometimes i just imagine playing an instrument while she is singing. I don't like recording from concerts, though, because i want to imagine us being together without crowd of some people.

>tfw you realize there is actually another mind inside your mind that is hidden in your subconscious
I never realized this until I started lucid dreaming.

What are the differences between your mind and that one?

>tfw you know doing something bad is literally the only way to make people acknowledge your existence

I'm not sure I am trying to lucid dream more so I can find out. It definitely is another mind though because even though I am fully conscious in the dream I don't have full control and it is also partially in control but ultimately subservient to me. It's like it tries to fuck with me but listens to me too. I don't know if that is making sense but it is kind of beautiful. I also recently came to the realization that reality is actually mental in nature meaning everything we see is actually create by consciousness (a shared consciousness).

fuck this happened to me one time also. it was in my hogh school freshman year and there was this welcome back party for the freshmen at a different school. i thought i could see my friends there but they never showed up. it was just me in the corner on my phone, anxiously waiting for it all to be over. its dreadful

I want to join archery club, but i have to wait for another year, because i work 30h/week and study for master degree. I know this degree can be useful, but god i hate wasting time on uni so fucking much, when i already make decent money as software dev.

Why don't you think you were just regularly dreaming?
Why were you anxious, though? If you have friends, but they just didn't show up, it's a valid excuse for being alone.

>software dev
what's your major
how hard do you study

Every time i feel close to feeling connection with people something causes me to recoil from it or i am wracked with bullshit in life that breaks my serenity.
Fuck these fucking cycles i am sick of being trapped in this karmic hell hole of a planet i just want release from it all so i don't have to be torn on all sides by misery and temptations.

Computer scinece.
Barely enough to pass exams. I'm not from US, so it's not really hard.

the solitude is my only comfort. I ruin everything i touch, and id prefer not to hurt anyone or anything anymore.

neither am i
anyway where are you from
and what's an average day on the job for you

>Why don't you think you were just regularly dreaming?
Because it was a wake induced lucid dream that I intentionally got myself into. It is really a surreal experience I basically get myself into a sleep paralysis situation and experience all kinds of strange hallucinations like my body is bending and I see flashing images and things like that and then get into a lucid dream. Sometimes I get too excited and fuck it up though. Afterwards I usually wind up inside my dream bedroom and then walk outside and explore doing whatever. It's very different from a normal dream although I actually think regular dreams are like this you just aren't conscious so you don't feel it. The coolest part about it is when you wake up it doesn't feel like waking up but just opening your eyes it's very strange.

I'm sorry user that sounds horrible. The best I can say is try and do some things that help you feel at peace. If you can try going for nature walks and go site seeing and can be a very peaceful enjoyable experience. I have felt similar before but I recently realized it was in part because I was taking being a victim into my identity and trapping myself. I'm now trying not to see myself that way anymore and instead just trying to find peace of mind.

>tfw you want to express your feelings, thoughts and ideas through any form of art but you're still too unskilled/talentless to do anything worth shit
>tfw you will probably stay like this fort he rest of your life

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Go to /ic/ and find the /beg/ thread and start following it. Don't be too worried about immediate good results just try to build up slowly. I've been improving my art I'm still an amateur though. Keep at it user and take breaks from time to time so you can unwind.

I like to bake crepes maybe if it's not correct name for it, but it's the closest analogue for these things in my country. I wish i had someone to make them for. I can't make them for myself now, since i have to lose another 10kgs.

>tfw I've been stuck in the /ic/ sticky for 3 years now
Not to say that I haven't improved though, it's just that I wish I could have done this years ago so I could start drawing my ideas/porn with some optimism.

Eastern Europe.
>what's an average day on the job for you
>code
>attend a meeting with the rest of the team where we share what we've done for past 2 days
>code
>message someone from the team to ask something
>review other dev's code
>eat
>code
That's it.

you need more balance in life.
socialize more and then if you had enough go back to solitude.

heck, I like to think I'm a very private individual but now that I work a job where I'm surrounded by normies all day long, I just have to socialize. it's fine mostly but my god, you will miss the time where you can actually be only by yourself and just your own feelings and thoughts.

I know that feel. I've been imagining technomagical world for past few years and characters and story, but i don't know how to create anything of value from it.

emotion = rollercoaster up and down
connection = push and pull never reaching there
thoughts = murphys law
action = destructive routines and cycles
serenity = fleeting and sabotaged by actions
sanity = hair thin yet i jump on it like a line walker
relations = barely together, i take but i don't give
and my brain fucking hurts again, ill go back to music that usually help

It's funny how i look at people my age and assume they look much older than me, even though i'm sure i'm actually look older then they. I think i'm unconsciously comparing them to myself when i was 16 at first second.

>will love you unconditionally.

Dogs and cats will eat your copse when you die, or even start gnawing you when you pass out

don't fool yourself, animals are incapable of love

I'm not exactly against someone eating my corpse if it's for their survival. Just don't eat me when i'm alive and it's good.

>if it's for their survival

what about literal minutes after your death? I remember a case of a guy shooting himself, and when family came to investigate, the man's best friend already ate half his face off

First minutes is definitely not ok.
Anyway, i'm not that one user, who recommended animals, i'm OP and i don't really like them, as i said.

I accidentally stumbled upon the song from this trailer youtube.com/watch?v=Mr8fVT_Ds4Q and there is no full version yet. That's bad. I hope i'm not going to die before fall.