Anyone else posting from a hospital room?

I'm stuck here for two weeks and was wondering if anyone else here is phoneposting from a hospital bed

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Nigga are you dying of cancer or something!??

Nope but this is something I've fantasised about.

What you in for user?

Stabbing user. I came in Tuesday in the early morning.

Let me guess, tried to do the whole robot uprising and a bigger got sick of your shit?

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No user, I stabbed myself. I was trying to kill myself

Bigger? Bigger what?

Where did you stab yourself? Are you happy you survived?

>I stabbed myself. I was trying to kill myself
Well you did a pretty shitty job of it. Did you stab yourself in the hand or something?

I stabbed myself repeatedly in the stomach. I was trying to kill myself and I am very upset I survived.

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I was trying to say NIGGER user. NIGGERS were stabbing this tardbot.

timestamp of bandages or it didn't happen

>I am very upset I survived.
I'm sorry to hear that, you should have found a more reliable way of going about it if you really wanted to die though, the human body can be pretty resilient sometimes.

How bad of a physical state are you in right now?

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You all already know who I am.

I would have succeeded but a cousin rushed my body to the hospital. I currently can't move my body below my shoulders and have a shit bucket. I wish someone could come in and kill me with a lethal injection

user..... This isn't you is it?!?!

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That used to be me. I'm a lot more pathetic now.

Holy fuck man how do you plan to complete the deed for sure next time?

Idk. I'm a hardcore gun guy and dont want my suicide used as gun control propaganda if I end up killing myself with a firearm.

I've tried OD, stabbing, wrist cutting, but nothing seems to work

your going to have to go to the looney bin for atleAST one month

By my estimates it's more like 2

Try stabbing yourself in the neck next time if you want to get the job done

>stabbing yourself
>failing to do so

sudoku yourself