Walking inna woods

>Walking inna woods
>See this
Wat do?

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fall to the ground and start crying really hard with a gun in my lap
when they see me i yell at them to go away

Ask them why they're fucking in a tent when they could be fucking outside in the sun instead.

Steal their boots and clothing
Also anything they left outside the tent that might be useful to them

>older model of the elixor 2
laugh at them from my superior tent i.e current gen elixor 2

Sneak up on them, steal as much shit as I can, and then knock their tent down on top of them and yell out
>wow what a fucking slut
Amd then run away
I hate people that have sex and if I could I'd atomize all matter in the universe.

It's a good thing I have my hunting rifle

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ignore them, and let them enjoy themselves, and go my own way

I'd wait until one of them goes to relieve themselves, then I'd steal their pelt so I can impersonate and learn from them.

you need to wait for blowjob part, you get two brains with one shot that way

Takes me back. Camping sex is pretty great.

Throw cherrie bombs in their tent and set their cloths on fire.

Get embarrassed and leave. One time I was in a private park and a couple of bratty underages were fucking on the lawn. I had to restrain myself from lunging for a stick and attempting to assault them. Chad would have gotten up and broken my neck anyway, nude and with a halfie

>Immediately walk away before I get attacked by the man in the tent
>If they don't see me, watch from afar and masturbate

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Light their tent on fire then run away

che che che che cha cha cha ha ha ha

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>sniff the boots a pair of boots
>run away while they scream at me
>hope I sniffed hers

Shout something like "having fun?" as I walk past just to make them aware of my presence and continue my walk since that's what I set out to do. Getting caught with your pants down is awkward and embarrassing but ultimately just gives you something to laugh about together later.

>Some small frail nerd with a stick comes swinging it at you
>what do?

Are you fucking Chris Chan?

And then you set them on fire, right?

BEAR ATTACK BEAR ATTACK SWIPE YOU'RE DEAD, SLASH YOU'RE WATCHING YOUR ORGANS FALL OUT WHILE YOU BEG HIM TO FINISH YOU

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It was dark. Like 10pm. Late, but still a disrespectful thing for them to do. Somebody's yard was like 20 feet from them. Asshole teenagers. If I could get the jump on chad and crack him real good over the bean with a big stick, then maybe I could have dragged stacy by the hair into the adjacent lake and given her a yeast infection

>i wouldn't worry about it
skinwalkers can't be robots FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Sex was pretty much the reason I'd go camping when I was underage. My dad even called me out on it one time.
>Me: Going camping this weekend. See you in a couple days.
>Dad: The only reasons to go camping are to get drunk or get laid. Which is it?
>Me: Ummm, both?
>Dad: Have fun. Don't be stupid.

I like this one

Ez originiga

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Take a picture and post it online.

Shoulda called the police. Made them both sex offenders

What is wrong with you people? I'm a 26 year old KV and shit like this makes me think the normies are right about incels. Other people's happiness doesn't have to make you bitter and hateful.

No phone on me or I probably would have. In retrospect probably for the best that I didn't get the law involved. I'd rather traumatize them with violence; that's humane by comparison to the legal shit

Unironically kill yourself.

Suck my fucking dick robot.

>Other people's happiness doesn't have to make you bitter and hateful.

It's about 50% ironic and just throwing a fit for fun and giggles. Relax, you newshit.

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Propably will eventually but until then I'm going to call you a faggot and remind you that you're aweful deserve to be alone =^)

thats great zim

stfu don't come to my bitter angry place and tell me what to do

what they say
what they mean

>tfw I also caught a couple fucking in the park and they ended up letting me join in

Grill though, probably wouldn't work for a robot.

We're gonna need a better greentext than that, young lady.

Ill light you on fire, bitch.

That's pretty hot femanon. Greentext it so I can get a boner in public.

Get your bleeding hole off my board. You have nothing of value besides your dirty whore pussy.

No man will ever marry you.

cry because not even in the middle of the woods can I escape this shit that goes on

I talked about it before tho

>Going around the park, find a secluded place out of the way where I think I can spend some time
>Checking around it and find a couple fucking
>Morbidly curious I stay to watch and have a go at myself
>Get noticed and caught though, the guy even roughs me up some
>The girl noticed though what I was doing and how I reacted and calms him down
>She talks to me a little and they go back to fucking and let me watch and enjoy myself, they like it too
>They finish up and we all had some fun and I think that's that
>The girl though pulls me to them to get involved some
>Really embarassed and didn't want to go that far but I liked it
>End up with them fucking me when the girl took charge and made me get into it like taking off my clothes
>Have a really weird time lying there with them after

Really I'm amazed we didn't get caught by anyone else but I did have to go out of the way to find where they were and I wasn't even looking for them. It's a strange situation but it didn't happen all at once and at the time it kind of just happened along and felt right as it did.

this never happened. nice larping, faggot.

>be average looking female
>walk into park
>get free fetish sex with strangers

Must be nice. God damn it life is hard and unfair

Fuck you yes it did

>reads like a really shitty porno premise
i'm sure this happened

>average

I wish, I don't think I'm good looking and don't take care of myself because of it.

What is life, but a really shitty porno?

Did the guy use a condom?

They weren't using one but he had one handy and was going to, but the girl stopped him and encouraged it raw. I freaked out a little and tried to not let it happen but she kind of shut me up and once he started going I just let it happen. Was gross but felt good.

originally set it on fire

help i'm gone too deep

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If it's a more remote part (and considering I'd never go innawoods without a rifle) I'd shoot the man, rape the slag and execute her. They never got my consent to be fucking normalshits.

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Look like normie sociopaths is this an ad for MSR or some shit
I used to be an avid outdoorsman before I became demoralized
So I would shoot the bottom bitch where he lays
Then have fun with the traumatized cunt thing

That's really hot. I hope my gf lets me creampie another girl with her someday.

Are you usually sexually impulsive like that?

>we incels just wanto to be loved

No actually I'm really reserved and shy normally. I'm a bit of a pervert in private though. That's kind of why I did it at first, since they didn't notice me I thought I could just enjoy watching and never thought I would get caught or that I could get involved. When I did get caught things kind of just got out of control and I went along with the impulse.

If instead like I'd walked up on them and they noticed me I'd freak out and apologize and run away for sure. It's only because I thought I could do it in secret.

How did the girl pin down the guy?
I thought guys were better at wrestling

Probably hide behind a bush and jerk off

Bash that fuckers head in with nearby rock and steal his girl
Cry as i rape her screaming "I DONT WANT TO BE A INCEL"

Stop and watch her little tits jiggle.

i try to sneak up on them and stick my fingers deep in their asses
at least thats what i would want to do

REEEEEE GO BACK TO YOUR CONTAINMENT BOARD ON /x/ YOU SKIN WALKING FAG

Kill yourself normalnigger, gtfo normalshit.

I think my parents coddling me to a certain age was beneficial but when i was 16 i was absolutely ready for shit like this
Fuck being under house arrest till i moved out, if i told my dad that when i was underage he would flip his shit

report them for rape, laugh from the bushes as chad gets arrested and his gf cries naked

>b-but muh inceldom m-muh normalfag boogeyman
Kys dumb robot

I bite them.

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Shit in my hand and then rush in and slap it on her tits
Run off laughing and calling them faggot fucks

Those who can't even open doors don't deserve anything. Let alone a cute female to cuddle with.

Eat shit and die.

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Pour gasoline in a circle around the tent and ignite it then safely masturbate outside the circle

>takes a can of gasoline with him to the forest

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Keep watching, looks pretty hot and I kind of have a thing for outdoor sex

I do agree with you that it's fucked that some people here want to kill others for no reason, but you're approaching this from the wrong angle. "Other peoples happiness" is a classic normie talking point, and ot isn't the point here. The point is that it's wrong to harm others if they haven't harmed you or are trying to harm you. You should address the principle rather than going for the classic "lol ur a loser" ad hominem.

looks like I'm pitching my own tent

What if I originally came there to kill myself by starting a forest fire and dying from inhaling the smoke?

>It's half ironic
>the other half is just having fun and laughs
Oh wow. You don't get this place, huh?

the mosquitos would be going apeshit

Step in for while but make sure to check my map again.

Clearly I'm walking in circles.

I'll just restate the fact most people here are actually joking about harming others
Its just a prank bro

I tell them to pick up the trash when they leave

I would take out my dick and masturbate furiously and then I would cum on the guys face while making seagull noises

Yeah... no that didnt happened

I fucking kill them if I don't see or feel like they have an entire group around there, sneak in and stab them right through the tent in their fucking chest with a makeshift polearm, twist it in deep and watch them scream and bleed.

Once they're dead i'll roughly fuck the woman's corpse, spit on the dead guy, take a few photos, once im done i'll zip up the tent door and then set it on fire, i'll watch it all burn from a distance, seeing that entire part of the forest go up in flames, then i go home and post on the deep web about it

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Oh don't mind me, just having a nice evening walk

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Watch from afar

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There was a case in Germany last year similar to this.
>couple innawoods camping
>immigrant nigger has the element of surprise
>catches girl quickly and puts a saw at her throat
>starts fucking her
>Hans calls the police and watches them making sweet consensual love

>shout "you lady are looking beautiful today"
>then walks away

I like your thinking

That's good too

start filming while staring them down with my dominant alpha gaze

probably awkwardly walk away with a boner and cry when i reach privacy

Steal their boots, clothing, and flesh when they aren't looking.

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Don't use gasoline, use kerosene or charcoal lighter. Gasoline itself doesn't burn, the fumes burn. Kerosene or charcoal burns as a liquid, more especially well if you pour it on something flammable like leaves or wood.

Also, leave a trail of kerosene leading away from the main puddle, that way you have less chance of being burned when you light it. If you can drench the end of a small amount of cloth or something and throw it onto the kerosene, so much the better.

Wear 100% cotton, never any polyester or cotton/polyester blend.

...not that I'm any kind of expert or anything...

>t. IRL fireman

sneak up, murder, fuck both their corpses, cut of a big chunk of flesh from the female(as much as fits in a steel bucket) for later consumption, drouse everything i might have touched in bleach and gasoline. take everything valuable. ignite whats left.

>grill
>posts here
>not a robot
Double standard.

I've been on the opposite side of this scenario. The now-incelbot who caught us ran home literally wailing at the top of his lungs and was never the same again after that.

girls cant be robots

originalee

Throw a bucket full of broken glass and other sharp materials into the tent then shoot a flare into it

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Kill them both with my shotgun.

Just kidding.

I'd use my knife.