So recently I've gotten into Warhammer. I read up on the lore in my free time. 40k and 30 not Age of Skubmar.
That got me thinking, which chaos god is the most Jow Forums?
Normally I would think Khorne, but the lore says that he can't/doesn't walk or stand up from his chair. Tzeench is a nerd, and Nurgle is a fat diseased fuck, so that leaves Slaanesh. But Slaanesh is a trap and I'm not sure what to think of that.
So Jow Forums, which Chaos god is the most Jow Forums? Which one will grant me more gains if I worship them?
Very obviously khorne Slaanesh is for total faggots
Luis Morris
Slaanesh. Just look look at the mire threads and why-do-you-lift threads. Most of Jow Forums is obssesed with aesthetics and pleasure seeking so Slannesh is the best match.
My first thought was Khorne but considering how much Jow Forums hates fat people and I would have to say Slaanesh
Colton Hill
It's clearly Khorne. Khorne is survival of the fittest.
Julian Green
its slanneesh for selfish/ aesthictic reasons but probably khorne if your lifting purely for practical reasons and have no care for appearance or performance. slaanesh runs way deeper than the sexual perversion. is about all things physical and worldly. such as pleasure and pain but also aesthetically . he is basically the god of self serving greed to the extreme. what ever you want go take it. fame riches pleasure perfection. it is of course a deep rabbit hole to go down
Chaos Gods are gains goblins. Do not stray from the Light of the Emperor.
Ryan Scott
Wouldnt Nurgle and his followers be the strongest. They take diseases into themselves to the point where they cant feel pain. If you cant feel pain then theoretically you could train infinitely. I would imagine if Nurgle really wanted to he could create a disease that would cause the infected to build muscle at obscene rates.
Grayson Evans
Fuck off corpse worshipper The Emperor sits on a chair all day and doesn't even fucking lift anymore. He's a perfect example of "went from 165 pounds to 230 with kids in 2 years" but with more auschwitz involved. Horus should have done a better job in putting him down if this is what he has come to.
Alexander Young
an da fittest and strongest
Juan Watson
But user, when it comes to lifting and gains, there is no upper limit, worship Tzeench and be a cheater, use roids to get stronger.
Michael Lewis
Where's the Slaaneshi cult that exercises excessively? I want to see some aesthetic motherfuckers run out onto the battlefield naked to OHP tanks while screaming about their gainz.
Jayden Sanchez
nah nurgle is literal stagnation so no more gains to be had
Nurgle is the best chaos god to follow. If you fuck up with the other chaos gods they rape your soul for eternity or shit like that. If you fuck up and die with Nurgle then you get reborn as a plaguespreader thingy. Basicly keep becoming one when dying so you live forever. And you cant feel any pain. So pray to Nurgle and let him take your pain away. You will then carry disease which will help you persuade your fellow man to pray to Nurgle aswell. Spread the wisdom and eternal life of Nurgle. Come, join father Nurgle.
Luke Sanchez
Amen borther
Benjamin Gonzalez
Nurgle is bloatmaxx Slaanesh is aesthetics/ottermode Khorne is bodybuilding idek if tzeentch lifts
Blake Mitchell
Tzeench cheats and roids up.
Connor Myers
>talking about jews and libcucks
kek
Chase Cox
If your first thought isnt to bloatmaxx for best chaosfu then you need to reexamine your life. You get unlimited thicc green buddies, an army of eternal bloat bros, you'll be strong as hell, though to kill, kill GDE mallets who can't handle your germs, and of course get the unconditional love of papa Nurgle.
Chaos is shit, Kharn hated Angron, Becuase Angron was a complete failure.
Kayden King
came here to post this >posts supporting evidence for the opposing side
Luis Walker
nurgle is the most Jow Forums, khorne is the most fit
Parker Phillips
grandfather nurgle best girl.
Michael Parker
slaanesh is the most Jow Forums, tzeentch is the most fit.
You dumb fuck.
Jeremiah Morris
>holds open the entire webway >acts as a beacon for ships as the astronomicon >constantly waging a psychic war against the powers of chaos >still has potentially millions of bastards with perfect jawlines all over the galaxy neck yourself, Chaos scum
>literally lifting for a cosmic trap never gonna make it brah
Lucas Scott
>this much ignorance of fantasy theology
Khorne incorporates the highest ideals of pride, martial prowess and ahtleticism; excellence and triumph above others. He is all about functional strength, if you want to simplify it.
Slaanesh as the Prince of Excess is all about perfectionism brought to sickness; honing one's skills or looks to absurd levels in hopes to achieve total, transcendent perception. Look up Sigvald in WHFB lore to have a good idea of what that entails.
Khorne is the god of athletes, Slaanesh the god for Bodybuilders (if you don't take competing into account).
Dominic Murphy
Perfection*, not perception. Fuck phoneposting.
Evan King
>Implying the Webway wasn't just opened so the GEM could get Eldar hookers.
Luke Bell
lifting for girls is slaanesh lifting for yourself is tzeentch lifting for the sake of being huge is khorne lifting for bloatmaxx is nurgle
Luis Butler
>Khorne is bodybuilding
Khorne is functional strength, because he doesn't care for anything other than prowess and results.
Isaac King
>But Slaanesh is a trap and I'm not sure what to think of that.
And that's how I can tell that you know very little about Slaanesh, or any chaos gods for that matter. Slaanesh is the god of excess; pursuit of highest degree of perfection. Wouldn't most people that go to Jow Forums fit under that description? Perfection of the human body, both aesthetic wise and strength wise. Muh aesthetics and all that. Khorne would perhaps fall more under the idea that you may as well train harder and stronger to kill as many things as you can. Nurgle and Tzeentch don't really work that well because Nurgle is only concerned with spreading as many diseases as possible, as varied. Perhaps if you went for bloat you could be a bigger, more durable host. Tzeentch though, no idea. Lifting for his sake could be dangerous, because you could benefit more for his neverending plan as just straight up fat. Have fun living with that.
Zachary Roberts
Khorne is not Jow Forums since all he cares about is killing shit. I'd say fit is slaanesh since eh represents striving for perfection and excess. So you either have perfection (muh waist to shoulder ratio muh abs)/excess (how to get bigger calves????) aesthetic fags or excess (numbers on the total that cease to mean anything) and perfection (muh sumo deadlift form) powerlifting fags.
Xavier Gomez
body building and lifting for recreation is slaanesh lifting for fighting is khorne lifting for a practicle purpose is tzeentch nurgle is anti lifting
Lucas Jones
>chaos gods lmaoing at you guys just transfer your conciousness to a necrodermis body you can shape it if you want like you fuckers even still have a soul
Either Khorne or Slaanesh, Khorne's followers turn into super buff behemoths immediately after recieving his gift and joining his horde. Slaaneshi followers can choose to have the most aesthetic body imaginable as a gift, which is a pretty shitty gift to choose considering his other gifts consist of a lifetime of orgies, a lifetime of torturing space elves for fun, an endless supply of wine and whatever sort of debauchery imaginable. Zyzz most def followed Slaanesh and we all know Jeff has to sacrifice an infant each year to Slaanesh to keep maintaining his perfect bod.
Christopher Fisher
Welp, I guess I'm a khornate now.
Luis Martin
>actually wanting to be a hungry skeleton for eternity
