Do you ever wish you were a doctor? I'd love to carve people open and see the meaty insides

Fine. I'm sure doctors have ways. Connections. I certainly can't do it myself.

Doctors are all psychopaths, and im not one so I wouldn't enjoy such awful work as much.

I don't want to carve people so much as I want to fondle unconscious women and play pranks on patients as they are knocked out.

I work in a slaughterhouse

I'm almost done with medical school and I have no love more any invasive procedures and I quickly grew to hate hospitals. I really want to go into psychiatry so I just have to deal with a few loonies for the first decade or so before finally moving on to depressed housewives and robots. Also, my back is shit and leaning over operation tables is painful and exhausting and surgeons are nerds made chads that struggle to deal with the sudden power and end up being arrogant tyrants. This doesn't apply to orthopaedic surgeons that are almost always bros.

You do know the vast majority of medical research no longer looks like Dr. Frankentein's pubmed journals? If you ever went into research it would have more to do with genetics, pharmaceuticals and working on the cellular level.

If you want to be a doctor just to do that, I would recommend just becoming a mortician

Yep me too. I hope to work in the trauma ward.

>I'd love to carve people open and see the meaty insides.

I do that without being a doctor

>I'd love to carve people open and see the meaty insides.
Join an anatomy course and learn something in the process.

>Do you ever wish you were a doctor?
am one
>carve people open
do that
>see the meaty insides
not as exciting as it sounds, it's really just that, meat. makes everything less mysterious imo

I'd rather be an undertaker

fucking normies

>not as exciting as it sounds, it's really just that, meat. makes everything less mysterious imo
After your first few anatomy classes, it really loses its charm.

>I'd rather be an undertaker
Why not a pathomorphologist? Aim higher than playing barbie dress up with the dead and the occasional sloppy stitching.

I just wanna unceremoniously dump normie corpses in the ground while their fucking normie relatives cry normie fucking tears

>dealing with living humans and their bullshit
Fuck that.

Being a coroner or vet would be very interesting to me, but veterinarian would probably break what is left of my heart since I love animals.
Besides it is a long ass education even in case I manage to do well at it.

Then it's certainly the dream profession for you. A high school dropout friend of mine has been an undertaker for the past decade. The only downside is how psychically straining it can be carrying around the morbidly obese deceased. However most of the time you just drive around with your fellow undertaker bros shooting the shit and get stoned waiting around at the funeral before carrying out the coffin.

>ould probably break what is left of my heart since I love animals.
DO NOT go into veterinary medicine if you genuinely love animals. Also, you can only make money in research or working with factory farms.

OMG user you so edgy stop rite there yioure scaring meeee :((((((( DONT hurt ME user !!!!YOURE exactly like the main character in my fav anime!!1!!1 all dark and edgy, I bet youRE a tortured soul whos evil ad something!!!1

Seriously fuck off. If you're over the age of 12, its not cool to be an edgy scrote anymore.

people probably ctrl-F the catalogue searching for shit they can quote and call edgy.

anything to not have to think.

not really that much to think. posting a gruesome image on Jow Forums and then saying you want to see a person's meaty insides is shit you'd see after class in middle school

lol ur a typikal konformaste. I bet u dont evin liek tim button movees.

MDfag here.

Surgeons don't really "carve people open" anymore too often unless you're doing plastics or trauma surg. Most of it is laparoscopic. Also, if you think that bloodlust is anywhere near a sufficient motivator to drive yourself through med school and residency and then the surgeon lifestyle, you're fucking retarded.

Imagine not just being a wagie, but literally eating, sleeping, and breathing surgery. No free time, no waifus, no hobbies, no shitposting. You view the people's inside with contempt; another obstacle to you just going back to the fucking call room for a nap.

This. People forget medicine is a service job above all else. You deal with retarded people, and unlike, say, food service, it's literally your job to try to educate your clients to not be as retarded. Have any of you faggots ever attempted to actually convince a landwhale that if she doesn't lose weight she will die? And not make fun of her or argue with her; not be a LOLOL UR FAT troll like you're inevitably imagining right now while quietly masturbating. But actually try to convince her while maintaining a working, warm relationship? Good luck.

You're doing god's work, user. We need doctors

Reminder that doctors are a lot more likely to kill themselves than the average population.

It seems like way too sobering of a field.

MD PhD drop out here

Was super motivated but I burned out but some of my long time friends are doing great things in the field so I live through them

I am now a business man and have sold like 400 million dollars of my companies services and products so far this year

It suits me better but I know I had the intelligence to be an MD PhD just not the willpower but maybe since I got close my kids will do it if they want to because closing deals and selling hardware and software is not the most fulfilling thing outside the pay

Thats like asking a barber if he plans on cutting hair

>Have any of you faggots ever attempted to actually convince a landwhale that if she doesn't lose weight she will die?
During my cardiologist rotation one of the cardiologists would just tell the morbidly obese to just fuck off and lose weight before seeing them. This was in Germany however and its possible to get off with such behaviour if you're borderline irreplaceable and patient isn't privately ensured.

Then you have the gift. But are you smart enough?

Some big-name surgeons I've worked with could get away with that too. That said, it's very uncommon, and, more often than not, they still somehow come off as a brutish "I'm gonna be a dick because I care" charm. Those that openly abuse residents and scrub nurses in the OR are often the sweetest and cloyingly nicest to patients. It's all fucking trash, man.

Based cardiologist.

I wish every GP would tell their patients to lose the weight. American/Canadian physicians don't do this enough.

Working on my MD here, just started rotations. I actually prefer just chatting with patients. It seems as long as you give a shit, shoot straight, and don't dick them out, they'll like you and respond well when you give them some tough love style advice. Also being an American doc in an area with a lot of Indian docs seems to make patients like you a lot more.

I hear a lot of stories about how German docs don't really give a shit about politeness. I can't say I don't envy that freedom

A lethal dose of morphine for literally everyone.

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>A lethal dose of morphine for literally everyone.
After the suffering of med-school and residency, you'd be more willing to inject yourself with a heavy dose of fentanyl than risk throwing away your career.

those infusions smile at me every day

>I hear a lot of stories about how German docs don't really give a shit about politeness.
I've also worked in Poland and Polish doctors quite literally don't give a flying shit about their patients and treat them with genuine contempt. From my personal observations, they're more educated than German doctors and have seen and can diagnose fringe cases that only still occur in the 3rd world and former Soviet hell holes but they're outright abusive. I remember an old woman dying and they called in a group of students to auscultate her heart whilst the woman lay there panicking and hnnnnnnging.

My dude are you me? I absolutely hate the operating room and want to go into psych. I fucking hate surgeons.

>tfw internal medcuck
I absolutely cannot stand being in the OR