/r9gay/ - #398

take care of him, cuddle with him to make him feel better even though he'll tell me not to because I could get sick but it's worth it because I love him

Is he gonna show up to our date?

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Yea, okay sweatie
I'm the one that gets shit on if the food's bad

I will he every fall for me ?

it was a joke i thought it'd be funny but it wasn't im sorry anons im going to bed now bye bye

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Awwww poor baby were the customers who overpay you with unreported tips mean to you? Awwwww I feel so sorry for you. Awww you have to be on your feet all day? I'm so sorry that could happen to you. And don't even get me started on having to memorize a menu, that's so awful I could never imagine having to do something like that. Imagine if someone else had to actually remember how to MAKE all the food, and even got paid less?

rolling, je ne sais pas

I just took a shower, I'll have you know.

Will I ever have the most perfect cute bf to spend the rest of my days with?

>tfw you get off to violence and gay rape

>(((sources say)))
Looks like I'm getting a bf yay

Will I EVER get an Australian (or French, British, Nordic, German, Italian, or Southern) bf with a sexy accent?

Pls magic ball

Oh yea?
Do you have to be able to perfectly present and poor a hundred dollar bottle of wine to a table of boomers while avoiding any criticism?
Didn't think so.

>poor
Oh my god I'm retarded

What are acceptable countries to get a bf from for you? I'll start : USA, Canada, U.K., Ireland, France, Switzerland, Austria, Germany, Denmark, Sweden, Norway, Finland, Poland, Czechia, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia
basically he just has to be white

I'd add the Netherlands and Seth Efrika

oh yeah, dutch boys are nice. Also forgot Belgium, Australia and NZ
also
>tfw no afrikaner bf to save and bring to America

Glad we're on the same page there

I'm sorry for being mean I just want your attention because you seem cute

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It's another
>I'm sorry I'm so worthless I'm sorry for being a bother to you I'm sorry I'm a waste of space I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry
episode

I swear, I'm about to flip my fucking lid. It is so goddamn tiring trying to act calm and nice to these kinds of people. I don't even know why I'm doing it. I'm so tempted to just say fuck it and ghost him, but then he might literally kill himself. Why did I ever think that talking to someone was a good idea? Fuck's sake.

Ok im going to ask you again will he fall for me ?

Maybe if you weren't a smelly chef de partie stuck in the kitchen and were a fellow waiter we'd be able to flirt in-between tables

It's nice to see someone else that's mean to people they like

it's hard, especially when they say something really self-deprecating and i don't know how to respond.
then again i'd probably be the same way if it weren't for me disliking when people pity me.

of course I will, life is good and i will be happy and i will get one this year or next year

Ok one more fucking time will he fall for me ?

Will my darling give me another chance?

Who you calling smelly, gayboy? I'll have you know I'm well groomed and scented and make it a statement to look good even when no ones watching. And I don't have to prostrate myself in front of the 30 year old boomers treating you like a plaything in the dining hall

if you were in the kitchen with me would could chat and flirt the whole time though instead of just when customers aren't looking, and teamwork builds trust and long term stability

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>Tfw no young Varg bf

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>It's my birthday
>Bought a cake
>Realize there's no point since I'm alone and no one will sing for me or eat with me
Haha, funny prank I pulled on myself...

See, that's the issue. I know exactly how to respond, and exactly what to say. I had an ex gf - repression's a bitch in HS who was just like this. So because of that, I'm great at this kind of thing. But it just reinforces the behavior and makes them do it more, I swear. It's just so goddamn tiring. I don't want to have to put on this coddler-persona. It's fucking annoying, draining as all hell, and really goddamn pisses me off.
I'm trying so hard right now to put myself in his shoes and not blow up on him, because I know he has his reasons or whatever. But, being totally frank here, he's not even very attractive. I was only talking to him because he had a super great personality that I loved. Now that this aspect of him has come out, though, he really doesn't have much going for him.
Literally, LITERALLY as I type out this post, I'm getting message after message of >I know I'm unlovable >no matter how you feel now, you'll eventually leave me >you don't have to pretend to love me etc.
Fucking hell. Gee, thanks for telling me how I feel! I wasn't aware that you were psychic - that's so cool! You should've mentioned that earlier!!1!

Please keep me occupied here. No matter how annoyed he's made me, he really doesn't deserve to have me blow up at him like I want to right now. Because by virtue of knowing exactly what to say to make someone feel better about themselves, I'm just as great at accomplishing the opposite, as well.
Fucking hell.

/blog
Sorry about that

I bet you eat the whole cake in one sitting, fattie

Too sad to even eat, I think I'll give it to any homeless kid I find tomorrow

m.youtube.com/watch?v=y3BeIeh0poo

Happy birthday fag

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>Inb4 he reads this
I might literally die.
Fuck, I'm not even thinking straight at this point, W E W L A D D I E S

That one is nice, thanks slav friend

Happy birthday, user. In an original kind of way.

I'm a Dutch leaf actually, I just found that song a long time ago and found that electric cover of it and the boy is p cute so I remember it any time b days are brought up and it's catchy

>tfw bf tells me he loves me and that there's nothing wrong with me whenever i beat myself up
>tfw he's losing weight for me and it makes me happy that he's trying

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Your bf is gay and you're a dummy.

I do love you and there's nothing wrong with you
you make me so happy and I'm glad you're in my life
cutie

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Thank you user, I hope you have a nice day today since you helped to make mine better

I'm sorry for the mistake and yes, the song is pretty neat

i'm gonna steal my mom's mascara

>he doesn't have his own already

Sorry nerd, but no matter how hard you try to smell and look good, you're still going to be covered in sweat and oil and smell like onions, making you gross. And you don't even get $10 a person in tips haha

But I don't know how to cook, so putting me in the kitchen would be dangerous since I might get distracted by your good looks and chop my finger off on accident

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Buy your own! Eyeliner is fun especially if you do just enough to make people wonder if you're wearing eyeliner or if your eyes are just like that

She'll know.
In an original way.

yeah, when i'm suddenly the prettiest person in the house she'll know

I bet you couldn't even tell the difference between butter and margarine you dumb server. Just keep carrying those plates! Ooooh be careful not to drop them! That's quite a job description: "don't drop plates and smile like a good boy"

I'm also very clumsy and I'd drop played every goddamn day and my resting bitch face would make me unsuitable for serving. I'd be too busy flirting with you to do my damn job

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How do you come out to your parents after going full Jow Forumstard to deflect them as to why you never got a gf? For the record they think I want to kill every last faggot on earth.

They won't be surprised lol, every mega vocal homo is just a repressed gay and this is basically a fact. Look at pence ffs

Start with yourself you whiny faggot

>For the record they think I want to kill every last faggot on earth.
Hey, so do literally all my friends

homosexuals are just men who wish they were women but dont have any of the attractiveness

this is why 50% of them suck up to women and why 50% of them are insufferable when it comes to women

Cool a new trip to add to my filter

lol I'm more attractive than most women, by far

you don't, they probably knew anyway
>implying I want to a woman
only benefit of being a woman is outside of african and middle eastern shitholes you get to keep all your genitalia

Happy Birthday Anonymous
I would sing for you and eat with you
I have no one either, my last birthday was really depressing and it will be back again in another month
sigh....

Hey are the guys that are attracted to masc guys the true gays, or are prancing lala girly boys the true gays?

Big flexing with yo boo thang >:)

>tfw its dark and you feel lonely but want to wallow in the self-deprecating thoughts and introspection
gwaah! i wanna hug!!

Nope, no idea what sexuality I have to be honest though saying one's straight or gay is easier than being Asexual which feels like a Tumblr diagnosis. I think the female anatomy is mostly gross though wish to procreate and such, all the same the male anatomy isn't a ton better. Would definitely feel more comfortable in a male relationship until they ask for touchy-touchy stuff, you know? I wanna be alone and get off of my isolation while simultaneously feeling grief from the void of positive human contact. Good words make me hurt because I know I'll disappoint, people think the wrong things about me, I want them to dislike me first since then things can be built up. People think I am strong or cool on first observation then they have to endure the ton of stammering, weird voice, practical inability to speak in order etc. It really makes me pat the desk.

Aww, bless you user! Happy birthday nonetheless, try to make this year the best it can be. have our energy, aaaaaaaaaaaaah!

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Hey tabletop rpg playing anons, roll over vs roll under which do you prefer?

Just some input from a random user, but if those are your worst traits, I'd take you in a heartbeat

happy birthday ... faggot
better put some oreageno on that birthday cake

You're right, because that's a useless skill to have you loser. I bet you're a fattie because you can't stop eating all of it, which is how you know the difference.
And I'll have you know that being able to carry several glasses/plates at once is actually a worthwhile skill to have outside of the restaurant.

Your bitchy resting face just makes you hotter and I'd try even harder to get a smirk out of you, meaning I'd be paying even less attention to my job. This is assuming, of course, that we've worked with each other for a while and I've gotten a sense of your personality. Otherwise, I'd avoid talking to you at all costs because I'd be too afraid of embarrassing myself in front of you.

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Ohh i love him so much but he just wants to be friends

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STOP STOP STOP
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO POST THAT PICTURE AGAIN

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leave user, nothing good will come from this. being his friend is only going to hurt you.

this image doesn't effect me because i can't be jealous of someone with that haircut.

pls stop posting that cursed image

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I'm not a fatty! I bet you're the fatty because it helps keep you grounded and balanced and gives you more surface area to carry around plates. And in what possible context is "can carry plates" a more valuable and applicable life skill than "can cook food?"

I bet I'd crack a smile at you if you're as cute as you seem. I bet I wouldn't be able to maintain eye contact without smiling and looking away like the autistic beta fuck I am I might end up smiling at nothing and laughing at no one because of a joke I remembered in my head though, so watch out! gosh I want a bf to be cute with so bad

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>no bf to cook for/with

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Exchange contact info already, you fags
Go, and leave this wretched place.

Stop posting these curses user it's breaking my heart at youth that has passed me by, like in that song, Brother Down

>toss a nut into my mouth
>it ricochets off my teeth and lands on the floor
this is an omen

>tfw no nihilist bf
>tfw no depressed bf
>tfw no suicidal bf

everything is /soc/ lite these days
i want the cancer generals back
actually no i don't those were /soc/ lite too but at least there was an occasional neet virgin fuckup that i could have shitty conversations with

this but also
>tfw no anorexic bf
most skelebois are sadbois

I wanna be someone's little spoon :(

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This whole board is /soc/ lite at this point. Go to the other r9k or the superior choice in general.

why are they all doppelgangers?

>no bf to stare into his eyes and to stroke his cheek lovingly before you lean in to kiss him and pull his body tightly against yours

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8ch r9k is a bunch of the more aggressive autist types from Jow Forums 3-4 years ago- "roastie scum", anti-natalism etc
wizchan is even more aggro autist types wallowing in their own shit
/soc/ is too normal and attentionwhore-y for me to like desu

i just want my small comfy internet communities back...

>no bf to caress your face when you first wake up and tell you that everything will be okay

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>wallowing in their own shit
I don't know what you'd expect outside of that honestly. That's the appeal of it to me along with the disinterest in improving.

>call bara gross
>some tumblr furfag harangues me for it
you hide someone in your attic during the furocaust and this is the thanks you get

I know i'de go back to you

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What a coincidence. I want to be someone's big spoon.

fug that really hurt

i dunno. you think with that whole emphasis on voluntary celibacy they'd be less fucking pathetic and angry about it. you'd think at least some of them could bear it without some snarky eletism towards normal or, even worse, some modicum of self-hatred
oh well. my days are gone, nu-/soc/ has officially taken over all of r9k

Nah i don't think you want to spoon a la creatura

Uh, carrying all the mixed drinks/shots from the bar back to your seat, dummy.

I'd do all that too, user. I also know that feel.

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