Hey ricepot.
You there?
Hey ricepot
Ryder Jackson
Jonathan Barnes
Hey. Don't leave me alone now.
Jeremiah Martinez
All right. I'll take it you're not online. Drop a line when you're here.
Alexander Adams
What the hell is this? Jeez I don't know which of these are:
>a new kind of trolling, inspired by conceptual art
>you were talking to someone in a message app and, for an unknow or clear reason i.e: you're high, or maybe it was an accident
and started typing here instead in the message app
>I'm so high I can't understand nothing anymore, everything is so abstract I can't comprehend
Jackson Cruz
Echo. Echo. Echojbhbhv
Ryder Thomas
>Yeah, I'm here bro.
>Origi
BRRRAAAAAAAAPPP
Luke Morris
You're not alone m8.
Original comment
Grayson Green
Good. How are you all doing?
Jason Anderson
I'm getting better each day that passes but I'm not 100% yet. I'm getting there though.
Last week I had really strong depersonalization/derealization.
Olanzapine also made me a fucking zombie
Sometimes I don't know exactly who I am but I am slowly turning into who I once was, but slowly. Things seem more real as each day passes
Jeremiah Cruz
I'm sorry to hear that man. When did it all start?
Jose Peterson
wow figures summerfag roasty is one of the most annoying kinds of drug users
Justin Carter
>When did it all start?
It all started with me taking way too much Choline, basically was giving myself Parkinson's and had weird fucking symptoms.
One day I got fucking desperate and dissociated and took things I shouldn't and went to the ER. Fuckers thought I was psychotic (I wasn't) and gave me fucking Olanzapine. That shit is poison to me. Haven't been the same since but I've got a lot of faith that I will recover and become myself once again. Just gotta be patient.
Kevin Barnes
the jury is still out on this one
Jaxson Fisher
Once I took a quarter of a quetiapine and I felt awful and super shitty. Had awful nightmares and some weird as fuck mental processes. Those fuckers gave me 4 full pills of that poison Olanzapine and I became a complete fucking zombie for 2 whole weeks. Like I had no control absolutely whatsoever of my Prefrontal Cortex. Sometimes I think it would have been better if I just drank straight poison and fucking died instead of taking this chemical lobotomy pill.
Wyatt Ortiz
That sounds awful man. Hope you get better soon.
I have never taken any pills so I wouldn't know but most I get is mental fog. Also sometimes when I read or write focusing too close on the book, things in the distance appear blurry. I go through the day hazy and disorientated which is really uncomfortable.
I'm hungover right now.
Joshua Russell
>things in the distance appear blurry. I go through the day hazy and disorientated which is really uncomfortable
I don't know exactly what you mean, but that is normal, I guess?
What I had was really fucked up. I didn't know who I was, where I was, what reality was, none of that fucking shit.
It was so fucking weird. Extremely strange. It felt like I was not in control of my self. It felt like it was me spectating from the 3rd person. There were times it felt like there was another World somewhere, it's very hard to explain. I felt also that nothing was real, nothing around me was fucking real.
Thinking in the third person is the worst fucking thing there is. At night you don't even notice there is a self because you don't think of the self, you just have this consciousness that you don't know who it belongs to.
Anything but the Olanzapine. God, I could have taken anything else, but why did it have to be this?
Ethan Nguyen
Yeah man. It's pretty normal compared to your condition.
Yeah that's real depersonalisation. I'm sorry to hear that. That's heavy. I've rarely encountered anyone with it. If I have the chance, I'd like to talk with someone who's DID and aware of it.
I've never taken pills or benzos or never intend to take either. I've seen people here say it fucks you up bad. I wouldn't call it derealisation but
sometimes I feel like a spectator in this world. I mean I'm still me but I can't experience or participate in the same things as everyone else like motivation, relationships, career, love, joy, happiness. No matter how hard I try, I fail and fall back to square one. I've given up trying. Makes you feel so left out.
I'm out of town and the Internet connection is real spotty. I'll keep getting back to you as soon as I can.
Michael Watson
>sometimes I feel like a spectator in this world. I mean I'm still me but I can't experience or participate in the same things as everyone else like motivation, relationships, career, love, joy, happiness. No matter how hard I try, I fail and fall back to square one. I've given up trying. Makes you feel so left out.
I know what you mean. I also felt like that, like you didn't really matter in the World, but that was a feeling I've had for a long time and I've learned to deal with it. It's not that bad.
The derealization I had though, was that I was an ACTUAL spectator. I looked at my hands and I didn't know who they belonged to. I didn't know who I was (and not in the sense of existential crisis, but in the actual sense that I didn't have an ego to say: "This hand is mine")
I'm gonna recover though. I'm pretty sure of it and I gotta a lot of hope.
Liam Cooper
That's awful. I hope you get better with the right treatment.
Anything extraordinary happen with you lately?
Matthew Hughes
>Anything extraordinary happen with you lately?
No, absolutely nothing. Just at home trying to get better.
Jack Foster
Do you have friends, family?
Angel Cooper
>Do you have friends, family?
Family. Not all of them are supportive though. My family has some awful people in it.
Friends only those in college, but I haven't been there for more than a month and honestly i don't even wanna go there. Fuck. I have barely any actual friends that I can really count on.