MIRIN thread?

...

what does it mean when thots look you in the eye then down?

It means she is likely attracted to you. The same goes if she looks up after looking you in the eye.

A girl asked how many girls I've been with, I lied and said 3 (actually 0) and she said 'wow I thought someone like you would have been with more'. I don't really know if it counts since she wasn't particularly attractive

Happened yesterday
>Finishing up at work, I'm a cook
>Their were still people in the bar area and I decided to get some drinks with the bartendergirls
>Costumers leave and I stay cause, free booze and 2 19 yo qt's
>They start drinking aswell and started asking me questions about my personal life, been only working there for 3 weeks
>They're getting drunk af, started pouring shots
>"How come your single user? You're a good guy and look at that body."
>Just said I haven't met the right person yet and I like the freedom of being single
>"You know anonette (an assistant of mine) is really into you right?"
>"Yeah I know, but I'm more interested in you two."
>They giggle and remind me again that they have boyfriends.
>"They dont have to know."
>We keep pouring shots and one girls bf keeps texting her, she ignores his texts
>They ask me to strip for them and I comply as my inhibitions were gone but only if they strip down to their underwear aswell.
>They strip down, I never thought this would happen.
>I started dancing and stripping for them (Thank you Jow Forums for this body)
>SHit gets heated and we all start to make out
>We closed the place at midnight and it was 3 by now
>I'm ready to fuck the shit out of them.
>Suddenly we hear a noise from the backdoor and after 10 seconds this mean looking tattooed guy comes around the corner
>What the shit, it was the bf that kept texting.
>It took a few seconds before he realised what was happening, the utter rage and disgust on his face was filling the room.
>"WHAT THE FUCK, I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"
>As alpha as I am I'm not phased by this. Ready to knock this fucker out.
>I stand up, we charge towards eachother, the thots were panicking
>Everybody get on the floor
>Walk the dinosaur

It's been years

I think the biggest troll here is you trolling yourself when you wasted so much time writing this ass pasta

kek

>be on vacation alone
>buddy who wanted to join had an emergency and canceled the trip
>enjoy my evenings on the balcony having a few drinks before visit the bars
>on the second day of my trip some Russian couple get the room next to mine
>we talk a little, cool people but she is way over his league altough he looks like he lifts
>one evening they had a party at their room, joined by their friends who stayed at another hotel
>they invited me for a few shots of vodka and I headed to some club with some people I met at the beach
>after a few hours I returned back to my room and opened my final beer for the night on the balcony
>the Russian broad was messing around with her phone alone on their balcony
>we started to have a chat, her friends are gone and her guy was wasted and asleep (you could hear him snoring)
>she asks me if I have another beer and I invite her to my room
>not even a sip and we already make out
>after we had sex we talk a little and she tried to explain to me in her broken english that she was attracted to me on the first sight
>she really liked my shoulders (thanks OHP)
>we fucked again before she went back to her room
>the next days as if nothing happened, just some small talk with both of them

>I don't really know if it counts since she wasn't particularly attractive
It doesn't matter how attractive they are. What matters is their standards.

You made it.

>Been lifting since around Feb
>Get the odd normie compliment how it looks like I've lost weight
>Think "fuck it" and start using my Instagram for the sake of getting opinions of people who know what it's like to be part of the grind
>A few people from work follow me on there from way back then
>One grill at work liked my initial coming out post
>Passed me today at work
>"Hey user, looking muscular" giving me a certain type of look

Feels alright, boys.

Daily reminder that using a gorilla greegree is not natty

I've missed you, dinosaur. Thanks.

Lmao

Hah! That's nothing. My girlfriend said she thought I was sexy cause I have big hands! Haha! How about that, son?! Hahaha, yeah I'm cool.

>walk into human female's line of sight
>she only averts her eyes by 12 degrees
fucking made it brah siiiiiiiiiiiiick

Based OHP

Stealing this

18 year olds dont know who kurt cobain is

>who know what it's like to be part of the grind

cringe

>at dinner restaurant with parents and cute blonde waitress has been hovering all night
>as we leave she says “I hope you enjoyed your meal” side note there’s no tipping so it wasn’t that
>mum moves ahead while girl starts sayin random stuff, only dad and I hear what she says next.
“I live just across the road”
And how do I reply?
“Cool, you’ll never be late for work”
>then I practically run off, due to fear, awkwardness and pure, concentrated autism.

>in car and dad tells mum what happened, mum orders me to go back in and talk to her, I don’t want to because of said reasons.
>go back inside and wait in the lobby for 5 minutes while browsing fit on my phone.
>return to car, “she wasn’t there I couldn’t find her”

The look of sadness and disappointment they gave me still haunts me.

You’re a piece of shit and she’s a degerate slut.

this desu

hahahahahahhaha kekked so hard
btw the new album sucks
my favoriet tracks are
nsfw
flight of fancy
the rover
if you realy love nothing outro

how are you supposed to reply to that tho without sounding like a creep.
> Heh, yea so maybe we should hangout since I know where you live...

>be me
>at work last Friday
>casual day so I'm wearing a t shirt
>female coworker "wow user you're really swole, what do you do to work out?
>smile and say "just a little wii fit now and then, plus this is a boy's medium shirt.
>I walk away
>tfw it's really a men's large

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Pretty much
Hey girl I’m here now let me get a minute and I’ll enjoy you

Thats a good question. The fact that she knows he's out with parents but goes for it anyway and then leads with "I live right across the road" is so forward and bad recognition of social queues that she sounds borderline autistic. Maybe you ask her if her shift is ending? For her number so you can swing by after her shift? The way she hit on him basically set him up for failure. I'd probably freeze up like that too just at the how awkwardly forward it is.

You autists. You say

>Really? So back to yours for a coffee is it?

nah fuck her, if she was making a proposition she should've said "my shift end soon" or "heres my number im done at x time". If she's still on shift what the fuck is the relevance of living across the road, he gonna wait there for the bitch to finish?

It would make her seem like a sloot. Shes testing the water, you got to dive in. So then she says

>teehee user, its a date, ill meet you here when i get off shift at x. Bring anal lube, lad.

i saw it on /mu/ and fucking died

Saying her house is across the road doesn't make her seem like a sloot? I don't know how much clearer you could say "fuck me like a 20 dollar hooker" without saying it literally.

what if they look to the side

alpha as fuck

I dont get tips either and I always ask if they've had a nice meal. It's common decency as a waiter. And ofcourse she's hovering, it's her fucking job and you were in her seating area. Also I live across the street of the place I work and bring it up all the time for no fucking reason, but people sometimes think I'm implying something. Just like you did. Sorry to burst your bubble user.

Delusional

u got me dam

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Female mind user. If she just says "meet me later" and user brushes her off, hes rejected her. She cant risk that. So her play is just to open the door, shes just casually mentioning she lives locally. Then if he brushes her off maybe he just misunderstood etc etc. and she hasnt been rejected.

What else would a standalone statement "I live just across the road" mean in the context that was given?

amulets... when will they learn?

why are you still posting this shit

>chatting with grill
>can't remember what we were talking about but she adds "but you're all muscly and buff"

>take off shirt, friend grill not being subtle and staring directly at abs even when talking to me for the next couple of minutes

>talk about cosplaying a character (makoto from free) and say I need to be a bit bigger to cosplay him, two grill friends just go something like "uhhhhh yeah I think you have that covered already"

I get an okay amount of comments like that from a bunch of different people and whatnot but I'm still a DYEL that hit 1/, close to 2/, but not even close to 3/4.
H-how low are normalfag standards.

What's your OHP ? Please don't be less than 2pl8

Goddamn I hate you shoulda told the dude. I mean its just sad.

Absolute madman

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>4 months ago 23yo virgin
>Just changed jobs was on the second day
>Been Jow Forums and attractive for awhile now but didn't have time to find someone cuz 80h weeks and didn't do shit outside of work but lifting, hence the job change
>Lots of qts work with me and they invite me to go get drinks
>Other coworkers that I hadn't met yet were there
>They ring a qt that was there the first day on speaker and tell her I'm coming aswell
>"Omg, do you mean hot user?"
>"Yeah"
>Multiple girls screaming
>Get there and introduce myself to the people I hadn't met yet
>Girls eyefucking the shit out of me
>Okay breath user, they dont know you, be alpha
>One qt made it overly obvious she wants the D
>We drink and laugh together, I fucking love my new coworkers
>We go dancing and qt started grinding muh dick.
>Party ends and we all leave, be alpha as fuck and take the girl that grinded me by the hand, leading her.
>Get to her car and I go in for the kiss
>Tell her she shouldn't be driving in that state and I only live a 5-min walk away.
>She comes with me, we start to take our clothes off
>She gasps and smirks when she pulled down my pants. Omg I'm not sure it's going to fit
>Only one way to find out.
>Fuck her real good especially for a virgin (they dont know thou). Th-thanks porn and Owen Gray...
>We talk and fuck some more
>Tells me I've got the biggest dick she's had by far and ask me how long it is.
>Idk never measured it, so we measure it for lulz. 21 cm.
>2 days later go back to work, girls giggling asking me how it was with anonette.
>Twas guud
>Keep fucking her a few times a week
>They call me monsterdick
>ffw month later and 31 yo milf asks me if I want a ride home
>Tell her yes and invite her in for drinks
>Fuck her, tells me annonette was right about me and it was big and good af.
>Keep fuckinf her on the side aswell
>Ffw to 5 weeks ago. Gay coworker introduces me to 20 yo Swedish blonde big ass and titties friend.

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>Gaybro jokes about me being buffed and having a big dick
>Peaked swedes interest and we start with the bants
>Next day she adds me on FB and starts talking to me
>Have alot in common, same taste, both workout, listen to the same music, experienced some of the same shit.
>We go out and hook up
>Omg user, she was all over me.
>Been dating ever since
>First anonette and milf sour I'm exclusive.
>First anonette even cried and said she thought I was the one for her and that I played her. Bitch what you took my v-card stfu.
>Happier than I could've ever imagined I would be
>Thanks Jow Forums

this
women are fucking retards who dread rejection above everything else. One of the keys to making it is realizing you'll NEVER be as insecure as the average woman.

2/10 who strips in a public bar? This pasta's undercooked.

wow, please see a psychiatrist

>A few people from work follow me on there from way back then
huh? You had an instagram but weren't active? what the fuck is a "coming out post"

kek

its when you post a shirtless picture of yourself (usually beside one before you started lifting) telling everyone how hard youve been working. Everyone see's it as cringe but this poor user is deluded into thinking hes made it

your buddy's cuter, you should fuck him

I never thought I would find another clever way to call OP a nigger after all this time

Faggot

Stop hating on this young user. Our board is better than that.

Good job user :)

A coming out post is where one first announces their homosexuality on social media

Kek, I unironically used the Wii fit and Zumba line a week ago at work, it just kind of slipped out and I had to escape to go lol someplace

This is one of the worst I've read.

Don't know if this applies as mire, but here goes
>4 months ago be fatfuck 224 lb 6'2''
>get a night call from bro, has lured a 6/10 girl to go to his house for drinks
> 6/10 will only go if he brings a friend for her 8/10 friend
>enter me, get introduced to 8/10 girl since i already knew the 6/10, small town
>late night and i didn't seamed to click with the girl, just random chat
>bro is hooking up heavily with his girl, decide to be good wingman and give him space
>tell the girl i am with to give the couple some space
>i'll invite you dinner and take you home just let my bro score, "sure no prob"
>later outside her place, tell her it was nice knowing her and thanks for not cockblocking my bro
>"user wait" leans towards me and we start making out, "heres my number, call me"
>did not see that coming
>chat her up and go on a date a week later
>same as before, make out heavily outside her place
>"call me soon user"
>bitch blue balled me again... after she ordered dessert at dinner
>unbelievable
>send her a text 2 days later...no reply, another text 4 day later... no reply
>the nerve of this bitch
>fuck it, i've been chatting more girls and work has been very absorbing lately
I did a heavy cut and focused on work this past months , plus i have been traveling a lot and didn;t went out in my home town
Lost 36 lb almost leave the fat fuck status
>ffw to past weekend
>go hit a local club with some bros
>go say hi to some other friends
>bitch is in a table right next to them, she notices and comes straight to me
>"user how you've been, long time no see, come to my table to catch up" yeah maybe latter
>get a table with bros and we call some girls, having a blast since i haven't went out for a long time
>all night bitch keeps coming to the table,"user come have some shots with me" "are this girls your new girlfriend or what" "user don't tell me you prefer them over me" and so on
>laugh it off every time she comes and keep telling her i'll go to her table in a moment
cont

law of the jungle, beta bitch

>live in Japan
>Lift for 2 months
>12 pull-ups, 90kg squat, 50kg ohp, never benched in my life
>Constantly being complimented when out with friends
>"Wow hockey player wow muscle"

>It's all meaningless because Japanese people just compliment each other as a means of smalltalk

keep going

>almost closing time at the club, lights on and not so many people left
>bitch catches me in one of my trips to the bathroom
>"user you never came to my table the whole night, why did you stopped texting me?"
>say what? the nerve of this bitch
>keep it cool and tell her since she did't reply to my text i figured she wasn't interested
>"sorry but i was soooo busy with work, what are you doing after here? maybe you can give me a ride home so we catch up"
>we'll go to bro's place, but he wants to keep it only close friends, sorry
>"oh ok... well text me next week so we can hang out"
>yeah right
>ffw yesterday, get text from her
>"hhheeyyy user whats upp"
>don't reply and delete message
Pretty childish i know lads, but revenge is like a fucking gods nectar to me even, better than mires.

niiiceeeee but if you fucked her and then cut contact would have been better

>wow fat titties, nice
>..oh thank you baka gaijin
>so which way is the subway?

>be me
>don't get mired
JUST

That's nothing
>get a gym crush on girl at gym
>she seems to look as well with her friend
>finally talk to her and make small talk
>ONCE
>next fucking workout she brings in some random ass guy I've never seen an is sticking on him like flies on shit
>Makes it obvious to move him into my field of view
>feels like she's avoiding the fuck out of me now
>start going earlier since I got mog'd and don't want to deal with her anymore
>now it literally feels like we avoid each other if we are in the gym together

Guess I"m fucking ugly

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She’s either a massive bitch or she actually likes you and wants to make you jealous.
Or both.

I hope this catches on

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Not him but
>wants to make you jealous
Why and what do they hope to accomplish with this?

Wow haven't seen this pasta in a while

gonna have to disagree with you, there, bud

kek

pretty low

>be me
>riding bike shirtless
>60 year old woman looks at me
I've fucking made it bros

>Go to concert with some friends
>Including a girl I have a massive crush on, who brought along her thot friend I barely know
>Tailgating beforehand
>Thot friend is drunk and already all over me.
>Take off my jacket because it's hot as fuck, have tank top on underneath
>Hear drunk thot friend say to the other girls there "Tell me bad things about user. Give me a reason not to."
>God fucking damnit why.
>Drunk thot is all over me, walks right up to me and wraps her arms around me
>mfw
>Somehow get out of it without being a dick about it
I should be happy, first time a girl has shown clear interest in me in years. First time I've been openly mired. But it just made me sad and frustrated. Blew my mind how easy it was, with someone I don't care about. But with the girls I like nothing ever happens.

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“Hello darkness my old friend”

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fuckin kek

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@47448067
3/10 only because some newfags will think this is unique. And you forgot to open the door

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keep at it, user. it'll happen eventually

If you fit in a medium you are a delusional DYEL

fuck her friend you pussy life isnt an anime

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Underrated