Tell us the worst crimes you did
>broke into several public schools to steal computers. Got over 10 this way
>grew weed and shrooms in my parents' house
>snuck into a botanical gardens super late/early and jerked off in this giant 2 story gazebo
>sold shitloads of bootleg dvds on ebay before they cracked down on piracy. Made over 15k this way.
the early 2000's were effay
i accidentally killed a man when i was 9 by throwing a terrible pitch at a little league game that went into the stands and hit him directly in the neck. the man's daughter was on my team. her screams still haunt my nightmares almost every night. i ended up cutting my wrists a couple weeks afterwards and almost dying and then spending 3 years at sperg camp
Wait a sec this seems suspicious
bandito man is manifesting his powers
no no, this is fine
this is a safe space
i'll go first
when i was 4 i took my neighbors goldfish out of it's tank
A 9 year old can throw a ball so hard it breaks a man's neck. Nice try hulk larper.
I let my rape dwarf escape.
it didnt break his neck it collapsed his throat. i wish i was larping
>steal 5 boxes of the highest quality condoms from walmart (ended up using them to jerk off with)
>steal over 200$ worth of shit from walmart
>steal from dollar stores every day, up to and including a box of 30 large chocolate bars
>stole roman coin from friend when I was young
>killed over 20 migratory birds in my back yard with a pellet gun because they were so fucking loud (grackles)
>hunt animals out of season
>illegally own unregistered guns for 4 years
>shot crossbow in yard back yard
>smoked weed in public, sold weed in public
>rarely wear seatbelt, use phone in car everyday almost non-stop, drove drunk, drove high over 100 times
It's a fucking miracle I was never caught. I don't do nearly as much illegal shit as I did in my early 20s but still
Prove it fnaggot?
I smell copper
how was camp?
i was the ace pitcher in my little league and could throw 70+. once i hit a tard square in the face with a fastball and it just broke his jaw.
>sold shitloads of bootleg dvds on ebay
I always suspected there were faggots who got rich off this shit or at least made a decent amount of money. VHS copying and MP3 CD burning, too. Imagine being able to sleep sound at night knowing nobody is going to investigate anything because that format is dead and obsolete and buried in another decade.
>Used to stay after school all the time
>Wait until all the jocks go down to the field for practice
>Steal all their money
>Hear them bitch about it in class the next day
Made some pretty decent money doing this.
I'm a retired thief. No regrets, I made a good living at it for a long time until society changed and it was no longer profitable.
I used to find places that did business mostly in cash, study their routines, then hit them at their most vulnerable time. I usually made a few thousand a week, but one time I robbed the dude making a bank deposit run from a movie theater on a Saturday night and took in almost 40K in one swoop.
I never took anything from an individual, and I never hurt anyone. I only stopped because plastic has pretty much replaced cash for most people when making purchases, and I'm not into mugging people.
Stole a original copy of mein kampf from an antique bookstore. The old lady owner was nice too
Not me, but someone else did the most incriminating thing ever.
Someone on I met on r9k posted my personal info, and some anons asked "well tell us their contact so we can have them too"
He posted my contact info, tells people how to act if they want nudes from me,
A nice user who added me from the thread told me what happened and I nuked the account for my safety.
Tldr; someone maliciously tried to pimp me out to r9k, ironically enough the experience scared me out of sex even more, and he even knew I was sex repulsed, he played himself so hard, he /had/ to have left r9k
Disclaimer; this was one and one and personal, I gave him my real info to prove that I was friendly and not a catfish, I would know my own info too, so he played himself twice.
Grew weed for a season and a lot of little shit like getting drunk and smashing bottles in offices and shit
how old are you and how long ago did you stop? why isn't it profitable anymore?
I lived with parents worse than cops I couldn't do shit!!!