I just found out my gf had cheated on me with another guy...

I did, she said she was just extremely busy and didn’t have the time for it. At the time that was a good reason because at the time, she was actually very busy. Though obviously I’m doubting everything at the moment.

In the end, it doesn’t matter. She’s made her bed and nows she’s gonna have to sleep in it. I treated her the best I could and I gave her everything she could possibly have wanted. She’ll be the one who’s losing out, not me. Deep down I want to forgive her and move on together, but once a cheater always a cheater. She broke my love and there’s no getting it back.

Both your issues are a problem to you only because you weren't prepared

Is your grandma the first relative that passed away?
Don't be a pussy about that, it's only sad when you say the final goodbye, it's a coldhearted thing to say but you won't care after a few weeks and your life wouldn't change much. The grandma is fine in the other world and you would be fine as well

The gf thing is different, first of all make sure that she really cheated. You might be memed on.
Ok I'll assume that you're 100% sure now, well, it's actually good news, you got rid of a girl that didn't even love you.
You have really low self esteem. That's why you are sad right now, because you think that getting a gf was a hard thing. That's why you gave her everything, because you were scared of her leaving.
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this: but the reason she left was exactly because you gave her everything. Girls hate that in men and you probably appeared clingy, unmanly and desperate because of it. In fact if you regularly gave her material gifts or payed for her in restaurants she probably stopped loving you a long time ago and was just sticking around to get free shit from you

Here's advice for your future relationships
DON'T give them everything, be moderate.
Be prepared from the first day that the gf might leave at any moment. You will literally not give a shit once and if she actually leaves.

btw, since we're at it tell us more about the relationship you had if you have time

>even her sister was begging me not to be with her
What? Expand on this maybe
>it wasn’t around the same time my closest family members started passing.
Don't be stupid, let the fact that she left cheer you up and balance out the sadness from the grandmas. Think about the better gf that you'll have soon. (And I'm not just saying this to cheer you, this is what's inevitably going to happen)

Well, me and her has been dating for 1 year and 2 months. She was my first girlfriend so I guess that’s why I acted the way I didn’t. I didn’t intend to come off desperate, I just wanted her to be happy. So I guess I thought that if I showered her with gifts and payed for everything she’d be happy. I’m sure what happened wasn’t all my fault. I’d heard rumors that she was a liar to everyone and only wanted attention. Thing is, I told her all the time that if she isn’t happy with me to tell me why and if I really got bad for whatever reason to dump me because I didn’t want to do it and possibly hurt her. She’s a sweet girl, she really is but she didn’t really have a good upbringing which leads me to believe that’s why she lies a lot and doesn’t tell the whole truth. I won’t go into detail about her youth because that’s private. All in all, I’m glad I had a relationship with her. We did so much fun stuff and it actually made me a better person, I just wish that I’d didn’t end like this. With her eventually cheating.

grandma died 4 days ago and another one is in critical condition
user, do you have two grandmas?

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One on dads side, other on mums. Should have made that more clear my apologies.

I don't know her so I can't say for sure but for the future relationships don't shower them with gifts or say retarded shit like
>I told her all the time that if she isn’t happy with me to tell me why and if I really got bad for whatever reason to dump me because I didn’t want to do it and possibly hurt her
This is a recipe for
>appearing clingy, unmanly and desperate
>her just sticking around to get free shit from you

man, seems like your situation is actually hard, I don't really know about relationships but in a situation like this, leaving your gf and taking a break will probably a good choice, because after a thing like cheating things never go back because it's quite a big deal that the partner you are looking forward to spend quite a bit of your life with is already hiding things from you and even spending time with other people as her partner, I had a friend with similar kind of situation who took a break from relationships and got married or maybe he got another gf i dont remember fully, and it worked out quite nicely for him, breaks really really help, or cause a big fight through which you lash out all of the things, which will make you feel better if you care about her so much that leaving her is out of question and hard, it will probably also make her feel that you care about her genuinely, and can probably bring her to her senses, this thing really helped my mom and dad causing a big fight I mean.

The more I look back on it now , the more I realize just how bad I was. In my attempt to keep her happy, I was pushing her away and making her uncomfortable. She never liked it when I showered her with gifts, just a once and in a while thing yah know. She was my first girlfriend so I knew I’d be pretty crap at the whole relationship thing but yeah. In the end cheating is never right so I’m going to have to end it and that is just going to hurt the most.

Never too late for prayer, man. Just leave the girl and never look back. Every time you do it will be painful, and the only way to recover from a breakup like that is to forget her. Don't even meet up with her later just to go ballistic.

Focus on your family for support, I bet your grandmother has friends who would be willing to support you emotionally.

take it from someone who’s been cheated on by the majority of my exes; the sooner they cheat on you, more grateful you should be that they didn’t waste your time in showing you their true colors. people are toxic. all of us are toxic in some way. and for some of us, getting some new dick to put in us, or hole to put our dick in, is enough of a short term immediate rush to make us feel good about ourselves in the moment. so much so that we’d forsake long term love.
that’s not something you should feel bitter over. that’s not something you should feel betrayed over. you should just pragmatically understand that she’s broken, and you don’t need broken shit in your life. you’re already broken enough anyway.
also, your grandma isn’t part of it. it doesn’t make it inherently better or worse. your grandma wasn’t part of the relationship, and you aren’t entitled to not lose things. i understand it’s the sequence of events that sucks, but i’m trying to say forget the bitch. there’s more important shit to focus on, like grieving your loved one

DURR YUR MOM HAS A MOM, TOO?

I have to go and talk to her today, wether or not I’m going to go ballistic idk anymore. I still don’t want to hurt her because I actually do care about her. But I just cant be with someone who takes my trust for granted.

No, you DON'T have to talk! Get someone else to meet with her if you need to. For her sake and yours, don't see her again! I'm telling you, no good outcome will arise.

Please explain.

>3d
well theres your problem

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it’s true you don’t have to confront her. you’re not going to get an honest apology. you’re just going to get her remorse for being caught

Your emotions will flare up again. Even if it goes well, it will put you right back in the same mindset as when you broke up. You should grieve for your late family instead, you don't owe her anything. She has family and friends all her own to look after her, so take care of yours, too.

So how should I go through this then, because I just don’t know anymore. Because a part of me wants to ignore what she’s done and move one, and the other half just wants to go off and shit.

whoer qoth?
also
>doesnt watch ntr

ignore and move on. getting mad ensures you’ll stay mad, and you’ll be mad over some bitch who you don’t want in your life anyway. it’s stupid, short sighted, and less satisfying

Talk to an old friend for support. It's the only way, you can't go through grief like this alone.

you sound like a good guy, don't feel bad for what happened. We all make idiot mistakes in our relationships.

So basically I should just stop talking to her completely and focus on friends and family?

serves you right, you trusted a thot

yeah man they’re more important. that’s your foundation

Exactly. She'll be fine because she has some too. Never forget that when you need to get someone out of your life.

In the end, I guess it’s up to me what happens. I got 7 hours till I’m supposed to meet her to think of what I’m going to do. Thanks anons for helping me with this. I only wish it could have been on something less, personal.

Yeah, unless you put a leash on your balls, and gave her the other end before you broke up, which is what it sounds like now!

Poor guy...You should break up with her. I wish things to get better for you and your grandma

Depending on what happens, I’ll let you guys know. I’m probably just gonna sleep through lunch today and cut her out from my life.

My mom cheated on my dad, so I've seen what it does.

Cheating really is a horrible thing. I can’t think of a worse thing to do in a relationship. I’m so sorry

Whatever, it was a long time ago. I just know now that, whether we're dating, engaged, or married, if she cheats, I pack.

There’s no hope for cheaters.

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