Ideal gf thread

I think it's gross when men or women do it. Light teasing between friends is different of course.

If your humor is solely a Jow Forums kinda humor then a girl wont be funny. But iam not autistic enough for that to be the case for me.

I met my perfect girl and she was ideal in every way besides the fact she was a huge whore. She kept it real low key how many dicks she took on reg so i got to know her before i realized how trash she was

>outdoorsy, likes nature
>has a creative hobby
>likes sci fi and/or fantasy
>cuddly/slightly lazy, loves being in a nice warm bed
>night OWL
>sarcastic/black humor
>likes horror movies

>loyal
>introverted
>socially conservative
>wants a family
>happy with a simple life

>is this unrealistic
Ask yourself, do you deserve any woman?

>Somebody I would actually have interest in talking to if she didn't have a vagina
>Chubby
>Wears glasses
>Thinks I'm funny
>Three or less sexual partners
>Doesn't cause drama
>Loyal
>Trustworthy
>Not a slob
The chubby and glasses part aren't mandatory but everything else is

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Everything I think of is sappy as fuck.
It makes me think I don't want even want a girlfriend let alone an ideal one

I dreamt about a perfect gf desu, I didn't want to wake up but once you hit the 10-12h mark it gets exceptionally hard to stay asleep.
It sucks because I know I'll never see her again.

I dunno, maybe. What are the minimum requirements to deserve to be loved?

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Are you a good person?

Do you think you will do more for her than just existing around her and hope she'll magically give you unconditional love?

Would the female equivalent of you want to date someone like you?

Actually with one atm
story time:

>be out with gf, her friend, my friend
>local corner liquor store with live hippie music and people just sitting there smoking weed in public
>we get drunk
>my gfs friend is fucking around with my obv virgin friend
>he is shy
>she dances with him and is sexually aggressive
>even though she is getting married soon
>all of us think of it as just friendly teasing of him being shy
>he keeps texting me "get me out of this, I dont like her"
>still keep fucking with him because it's funny and everyone having a laugh
>actually gets serious when she starts putting his hand on hers ass/tits and kissing him on mouth while dancing
>my gf (an angel) confronts her about her future marriage
>"well, he is away in another country fucking another girl anyways so I can cheat on him too"
>my gf: "that is no way to have a relationship, how will your marriage turn out?"
>her: "I don't care"
>my gf gets visibly upset
>starts tearing up
>I call the night over and we go home
>gf friend calls my friend over for "coffee" at her place
>holds his hand and kisses him multiple times
>my gf is literally crying at that moment seeing her cheat on his future husband
>him being a fucking pushover accepts it even though he gave me clear signs of not wanting to go, mouthing me to help him get away from it
>get in between them, tell her that "he's mine"
>tell him to man the fuck up and tell off that thot
>he gets off on "Im sick and need to go home for medicine" excuse like a wimpy baby that can't say no to a woman
>thot mad at me
>get friends home
>stay with gf until late to calm her down and make her understand that there are thots out there that don't care about sanctity of marriage
>say sorry for actually allowing that shit to escalate and goodnight

She is pure angel and I love her from the bottom of my soul, but damn she is sheltered from the evils of this world so much that she didn't even see it as a possibility that women can be whores.

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>Loves me, loyal, honest, monogamous
>Okay with slower relationship, has values. No sex until relationship
>Can be just laid back and chill, I don't mind shyness or timidness though.
>Likes talking about abstract stuff
>More of a introvert than extrovert
>Someone who I can improve together with
Don't know how unrealistic. This stuff applies to me too and I'd be willing to commit myself to someone and work on the relationship.

>loves me
>loyal
>looks good enough to get my dick up for
>doesn't force me to do things

I fail to find anyone like this.

>Wears backwards hats
>Rocks the fuck outta some Chuck Taylors
>Thick eyebrows
>Dark hair, dark eyes
>Crooked teeth
>Pale as fuck
>Bullies me in a playful way
>Yandere though
>Smokes occasionally
>Likes spooky shit
>Loves animals
>Great singer
>Talks too much
>Funny
>Supportive
>Bullies me more
>Sexually dominant
>Loyal
>Decent cook
>Deemed weird by everyone

The fuckin' dream, boys.

I think I'm a pretty good person. And I'd do almost much anything she wants for her but people tell me this is a problem 'cause girls like guys with backbones. I guess I don't really deserve a girl but I don't know what I have to do to be acceptable. If the female equivilant had the same requirements as I do I'd fit them but she'd likeley have differnt requirements than me. Even female me would probably think I'm too much of a spineless wimp.

A fat nympho slampig gf who worships me and refers to herself in the third person as "mommy" or "mama."

So many red flags

>my gf (angel)
>she's sooo sheltered and innocent

Your in for a rude awakening one day

>cute face
>Can be flat as a playboard or have big tits I don't care
>kinda childish (I'm not a fucking pedo fuck off)
>likes to look at the stars and wonder about life
>likes talking to me
>geniuenly wants to be with me all the time
>likes dogs
>can have "depression" or whatever at the end of the day it's my job to make her happy and smile

Yeah that's pretty much it. I'll never find the girl I want to find even tho I'm called a 8/10 by friends (that are female so fuck off fagot's)

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4 years and counting buddy
this is just one of the examples, but she is pure wife material I will tell you that

>meet at least 80% of the criteria
>currently taken though
Life is quite cruel isn't it? At the very least take solace in the fact you'll outlive me biologically speaking.

why do you think you failed at dating so far and what can you improve about yourself?

youre all rats

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My ex dumped me last month for no reason whatsoever and she was about 60 percent that. I just hope to find a girl that will appreciate the fact that I'm there for her and that I will stand up for her whenever she needs. It'll probably never happen but life wouldn't make sense without hope.

I have actually been trying to improve my posture and stand more confidently. And I've been forcing myself to talk to strangers a little more. I know they're only baby steps but I'm trying to get to the point where I can talk to people a without freaking out. I'm considering visiting a speech therapist to see if they can help me with my stutter and lisp. It's probably not enough but I'm trying.

Did she have any signs of having some kind of mental illness or a former diagnosis? If so that could honestly be a likely explanation why that occurred. I know when I was off my meds for awhile cuz insurance wouldn't pay for them, Ipractically ghosted my boyfriend for a whole month before I got back on them. Other things happened to (like I lost a friend and kinda alienated a relative of mine) but I wasn't necessarily in the right state of mind ya know
Anyways if she didn't have any signs of being mentally off then she's just a right proper cunt

t. unlovable pit of despair

Her parents are going through a divorce so maybe that was the reason for it. However that was the second chance that I gave her and even though I still may have very strong feelings for her i I will never give her a chance again. If you know any girls that are like I stated above tell them that they are precious and any guy to get them will be a happy guy. Also tell them to give a real truthful explanation if anything happens.

That's good. If you can confidently say you're a good person and didn't harm others before in the past, just being shy itself won't hold you back as a person. Do girls often ghost you?

>enjoys cuddling
>enjoys reading fiction, reading at all is cool but im a smoothbrain so i only read fiction
>dominant but doesnt want to crush my balls or something
>loves me
>is cool with a 4/5/10

BONUS

>plays vidya
>watches anime
>would let me call her mommy

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Worry not, user. I've friends who were like that once before and I've chastised them about it. Hell I was like that once too during my first years in American high school. Practically fresh off the boat from Croatia.
Kinda became a bit of a goth and developed a depression initially around the time I hit puberty. Then got smacked with schizo symptoms and mood swings like crazy. Was an angsty, depressive, aggressive, and extremely hormonal teen during my freshman and sophomore years.

It's life friend, shit happens. I can only hope to find the one that will love me.

Good luck to you.
If you can't find someone that can learn to love you, at least learn to love yourself

Koji kurac je sa Hrvatima i zasto uvijek nalazin ljude iz hrvatske na imageboardovima

>Introvert
>Doesn't want kids
>Black humor
>Understands hobbies, has one
>Has some character
>Not overly family oriented
>Doesn't smoke
I just want a person i cant honestly talk to about anything, who will listen and be ho has her own opinion, someone who would stay in bed rather than go out, someone to do the dishes while i cook or bake, likes simple things in life, the little things that count

Can talk to, listen and be honest
Fuck phones and sleep

>introverted
>likes children and animals
>intelligent or artistic in some way
>dresses cute (skirts, dresses, thigh highs etc.)
>christian or at least saving herself for marriage
>wants to improve together with me
>makes me want to be a better man
>exists

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>not completely overweight (willing to exercise )
>long black hair (colour not important but black is pref)
>under 5'5 (pref 5'2-5'3 but anything under 5'5 is golden)
>light skin (pref Asian but any light skin is a go)
>cute (plain average looking girl can easily be cute af too me)
>20 years or younger
>virgin
>not a cunt
>loving
>bonus points for clingy/need

A friend i can fuck and trust. That's literally it.

loyal, honest, good hygeine, kind hearted, humble, not obese. The leaves an immense amount of room for bullshit that i'd tollerate and it's also standards that I myself can live up to, which I think is important. No one's perfect.. i don't want a cartoon, i want a person.

can't i just be satisfied with one simple image?

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fat nerdy sucks my dick all day and eats foot.

food*
originally

>tall
>thin
>pale
>raven hair
>blue eyes
>loves nature
>loves animals
>introverted
>into spooky and macabre subjects
>into psychedelic drugs
>into guns
>good conversationalist
>likes to cuddle
That's about it

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patrician taste except for psychedelics

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>not wanting to trip on shrooms with your qt gf while cuddling together out in nature

Would you consider 5'8 tall for a woman? I check off the rest easily except for the introvert bit. I'm quite gregarious and tend to be a bit openly amorous

I'd say that's tall enough, it's not a requirement for me but I'm just super into tall girls for some reason, I'm 6'2 myself

You're about the same height as my ex
Probably younger than him (and me) though

Yeah I'm only 19
Originally

A year younger than my manlet boyfriend.
I'm 30 for reference

Ideal?
>6'8"(or taller I guess)
>~70"-35"-75"
>Loyal
>Enjoys being dominant sexually
>Able to engage in deep conversation
I mean, I could go in for literal ideals

>11-13 years old
>latina
>nympho
>doesn't use social media
>spoiled
>bitchy
>dominant
>fucked up sense of humor

>short
>pale skin
>dark hair
>can sew and cook
>likes anime
>is dark and brooding/chuunibyou
>likes cats
>has an alternate persona that is Lord of darkness
>writes fanfiction
>flat chest

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>short
>cute feet
>asian
>black hair
>pettan
>she doesn't want to have sex with me

>short
>Introvert
>Glasses
>Likes computers and programming
>Bookworm
>Likes video games

>6'8"
For what kind of original purpose user?

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>realizes that life is suffering
>wants to spend time with me and willing to start a conversation when they want to talk to me instead of waiting for me to start it
>down with me doing fem shit
>down to talk what they actually think, whatever dumb/embarassing/personal shit they're thinking or deep down wanna talk about

mostly just that last point. I don't wanna talk normie shit. let me into your mind, I'll let you into mine, we can feel like someone actually does give a fuck who we really are underneath.