Drinking

I don't think he cares. He knows I'm his only friend, he knows I'm depressed and suicidal yet he decides to betray me like that. We planned to meet today for a fucking week or so and he just dates some fucking on the same day and lets me in the dark because "he's too tired". Fucking shit he didn't text me in 2 weeks or so, it's aways me who texts him and whenever I ask him if we could hang out he gives me some fucking one-liner excuse why he can't. Fucking hell I just want to drink more right now but my brother is worried about me and as the big brother I can't just be a sad pathetic alcoholic fucktard..

My experience? Like at the hospital? Was kinda ok. Met some cool people and a couple cute fags. One that likes drugs and apparently purchased 1p-LSD from the same company I used to, except he actually used powder and laid it himself which made me feel dumb. After a week I was out of there and I definitely want to die more than ever. Maybe if doctors were still retarded and gave out Xanax like candy I'd have a little hope

you should get revenge
how dare he not text in 2 fucking weeks
lol
I bet he didn't even go on a date he just straight out lied to you. fuck his life up, dude

>I can't just be a sad pathetic alcoholic fucktard..
iktf im an older brother too but i was that bad for a bit. its much better now but i stil drink too often. sometimes people need a break, being around depressed and suicidal people is draining and while im not saying youre driving him away and should feel bad i can also understand how your friend might have needed some time away. just my two cents
you gay bro? not judging but i was curious how dating is for you in that case. dont kys man ive been there and even though i know youll likely disregard my words since i used to do the same thing i can never pass up a sad/suicidal bro without telling them things can improve. not that they will 100% but things can..

just watchin the niners likely choke away another game
thanks jed thanks alot bro thank you so much jed

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dont follow sports unforunately. wish i did but it feels overwhelming to try and get into teams/players/histories/legacies

fucking shit man, am depressed as shit and want to die. i got friends to talk to but it wont heko, fully convinced i should end it all

whats up man you can talk to me at least. ive been suicidal before and got close but things have gotten better and i know how bleak life can be. hangin there bro i wont say things always get better but the chance is there. depression isnt a joke or a meme and i sincerely hope you can get out of it. if this is too public feel free to hit me up with your contact info. althoguth im quite drunk and might not be too much help onight

Shotty man.
7th beer deep and not even buzzed yet. Wish i wouldve gotten some everclear yesterday while i still could so i could sleep tonight. Looks like im walking into work after an all nighter again.

shit cheers anyways bro. what job do you have?

Wageslaving at a McDonald's, im a dept manager so I get better pay than regular wages, but it just makes me wanna puke. Luckily my living situation is such that i don't have many bills so I can save money to get the fuck out and go to grad school eventually, but i have a massive fear that ill end up in a factory my whole life like my father and his father and his father. I'd rather drown in a bottle than end up a cog in someone else's payroll any longer

Pretty fucking awful, been working 14hrs a day every day the last two weeks, hasn't been a single night where I got more then 4hrs sleep. Two nights in a row I got no sleep, boss just told me to go to a doctor, yeah I'll fucking do that in the 10 hours I get off between 7pm-5:30am. I fucking hate being a wagey. Just wanna save enough this summer to pay off all my debt so I can commit a guilt free suicide.

hope you can make it out man. never worked fastfood but ive done retail and serving and its pretty shit. back in school but just undergrad myself after yeras of fucking around so i know hwhat its like to want an actual career

damn what work do you do? dont kys bro cmon if you can save enough by then you can keep saving to quit and find a better job

That looks nice, did you cook it yourself? I'm literally downing the last beer in my fridge and can't get anymore because stores are closed. The only way I can deal with my alcoholism.

nah i ordreed chinese. i cant cook too well i mostly live off scrambled eggs and ham sandwiches. shit sorry to hear that thats the worst when youre jonesing for a dirnk but you cant get anymore

It's better this way when you think about it. I'd drink more if I could. But I made it impossible for myself to have anything now and have no choice.

good point. i try to limit myself and tell myself i shouldnt stock up but end up back at the liquor store every few days nonetheless. good on you for being smart and forcing yourself to not drnik bro

Boat hire off a really popular beach in Australia. Shits fucked, and nah I'm at peace with it, did until recently desire to join the police force, but then I remembered normies are fucking garbage and I have no desire to put my life on the line for them. Just going to spend the next few months to a year getting absolutely fucked and playing video games every night, two of the only things that ever made me happy, then end it when I get tired of it.

Wow that looks really good! Hope you enjoy that dish!

thanks man! a little too salty so i only ate a bit though. hope you have a good sunday bro!

i wont try and convince your any more but hopefully something comes along to change things up for you user. what kind of boat work? like fishing? take it easy bro

It's 1:15 and I still can't sleep. My insomnia has been fucking me in the ass latley and I have an early class tomorrow.

thanks bro, im working on improving myself

have you tried sleeping pills/meds? nt that its good to become dependent but maybe just using it once or twice could help
best of luck to you bro. glad to hear you havent given up

Why are you eating roasties?

nothing at my house to cook so i ordered chinses again despite never enjoying it

I have tried sleeping meds but they just make me feel more tired when I wake up and I end up not doing anything all day and skipping class because I'm so tired, I might try to find some different types and try those out if there are any

good luck to you a fucked up sleeping schedule is awful

I had a whiskey and coke last night before I went to bed and I listened to an old Bill Burr podcast. I was also smoking some marijuana.
I'm doing a few things that are pretty good for myself at the moment but I'm also a drug addict. I've quit the most dangerous shit for me though (opiate and benzo mixes). I mostly enjoy drugs that make you feel warm and loved. Which is weird because I've never had a girlfriend, I'm a virgin and I have no friends. Hahaha.
Fuck I miss oxycodone water and clonazepam.

hey fucking good on you for quitting. ive tried going sober and its hard as shit. ive never been big on drugs because i like drinking too much so i cant imagine the mindset you need to be stable and quit. really proud of you user, no lie. where are you at in life? working, school?

love you bro

love you too bro. im taking your love genuinely so i hope you take mine as well. have a good night brother

shit bro, i hope you recover

you too man, good night!

I'm late on class projects and mentally falling apart from stress and lack of sleep, as well as stuck looking permanently autistic

how many credits/classes are you taking? ive never taken more than 15 or 5 classes so even if ifelt overwhelmed it was never too much to bear desu though i guess taht depends on many factors like class prof and workload

I've been mixing spiced rum with my choccy milk, very interesting taste

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that sounds awul lol but maybe ill try it. more of a rum n coke guy myself i feel like too much chocy milk would be too filling to drink much unless its like 3:1 rum choc milk

on ebump before i let it die as it my custom. take it easy bros

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I wish drinking threads were more popular but most of Jow Forums is underage

yeah i feel you but im okay with people unable to drink in my threads. everyone has issues and if i can maybe offer advice or if any young fucks can see how much i drink and get disgused by it i feel okay

Thanks user. It's hard to break a habit once you get comfortable with it. I only quit the heavy shit after I took LSD and DXM within a month of each other and read the bible again. I haven't done very much dangerous or immoral stuff since the time period and I've generally felt happier and more grounded.
I'm in college right now taking a law course but I don't know what I want to do for a career. I spent all of highschool absolutely intoxicated and I'm just trying to do better here. My daily routine was:
>6:30 wake up
>6:31 pop 2mg clonazepam to calm down
>6:32 drink a monster
>shower
>7:00 pop 40mg dextroamphetamine IR to focus and remain conversational
>7:00 snort 15-40mg of morphine
>if no morphine, extract 10-30mg oxy or 100-160mg codeine in water then drink that
>orally administered drugs complete
>7:00-7:15 smoke as much hash, pot, shatter or oil as I could stand in 15 minutes
>when I'm done smoking the weed, benzos and caffeine would be hitting me thus making me carefree and not anxious but focused.
>7:20-7:40 I'd get itchy, euphoric, sloppy, loose and chatty as fuck because of the amphetamines and opiates. I'd usually be chainsmoking cigs by this point so as to not pass out.
>8:00 Arrive at school way too fucked up to pay attention
I did this everyday from grades 9-12. The biggest reason I got fucked up was because I felt lonely and bored. It also made music sound better. In between spending money on drugs, I would save for instruments I liked the sound of and theory books. My HS years were spent alone, fucked up to the point of near-death and playing music. I OD'd a few times but I didn't care because I wanted to kill myself anyways.
thanks man

>read the bible again
i used to be religiuous when i was younger, to the extent a kid could be but im glad you found something to base yourself in. although im not religious anymore my best friend is a pastor and i have massive respect for those who are in faith, whatever religion that may be. your past schedule sounds like hell im glad you moved on user. really strong of you

I'm out of shit to mix with my Morgan, how do I get myself to drink it straight?

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just drink i straihgt bro. im drunk as fuckk rn too but maybe you could chase with water if you need it? idk how much mixer and how many drinks you had but taking shots of morgan isnt the worst

Next time you get in contact with him just ask him to buy you a couple of handles of liquor. If you stock up, drinking frequently is easier.

Aww shot homie, I'm happy you made this. But yous a faggot for sippin on micro brew cork.

im out of money so im fermenting 100% welchs grape juice for 5 days now it smells like pure rubbing alcohol probably full of methanol and disease due to my neglect tastes even worse im gonna strain the yeast out and drink it already fuck it i don't care if i get sick or die

thanks, the water chase really helps

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I wish you good luck, hope you survive

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getting drunk off of taaka vodka and great value sparkling lemonade. Have a good night

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man judging people for what tey drink and enjoy is faggotry bro
i vealways wanted to maek my own alcohol but that sounds like bad news...be careful user
sounds like a nice easy drink. i ran out of beerso am just taking shots of soju now have a good night bro

has anyone tried sake? I saw my local liquor store carrying some.

i have a few times but could never get into it. im a soju fiend which is kind of similar but from what i know sake is more delicate and varied

So by your logic im the faggot for buying a working mans beer. What's your point? That you like sucking fluid out of a phallic shape and pretending to be to be straigh on the internet?

no no, i just think its dumb to judge people on what they drink. i love miller lites i dont look down on anything

Yeah all I take now is 15mg dextroamphetamine daily for ADHD and I smoke weed for the comedown. And I like beer and whiskey too much to give those up, plus booze is a good sustitute downer for opiates because they feel similar to me.. Also yeah my past schedule was really shitty. After I got home from school I'd just chainsmoke, listen to records and hit my bong. Opiate/amphetamine comedowns were always deadly shitty but clonazepam lasted like a day for me, so that helped.
I wouldn't say I'm technically religious because I don't believe the bible is the true word of God and I don't believe in a God. I'm a pretty verbally fluent guy when I'm not fucked up on drugs (so not right now) and I love good stories. I read the bible and got really hungup on certain characters and paragraphs because I was taking a lot of amphetamines and smoking pot (which I still am haha.) I went a little manic. I was thinking about all of those characters in my day to day life and it made me really happy, quiet and content. I also felt/feel really comforted thinking about verses about sainthood, sinfulness, the kingdom of God and redemption.

Thats funny cause I could swear you were just looking down on my cock and gurggling foam

well im glad you can find some peace in whatever you chose to read user. ive never been hooked on anything other than alcohol but i know how great and shit it can be to be hooked on something and im glad you are at least weaning yourself. keep going bro

im getting drunk on 1 cup actually its pretty good not bad thanks pal

Thank you, friendly user. I'm excited to go to school tomorrow and talk with my friend. I might ask her if wants to smoke weed between classes like we the other day. She has interesting weed, dank breasts and a big personality.
I'm gonna shower and then go to bed. I wish you a good night and I appreciate your advice : )

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good luck tomorrow bro, hope you cna have a good smoke sesh with your friend. good night and take care

before i pass out is ther anyone outthere thatwould be down for a discord server for just drunk fucks? i venever used it but whenever i drink i want to talk and shit and would be nice to just be able t pop in and talk

>has anyone tried sake?

I buy some bottles every now and then and it isn't anything special, 20% feels like a sweet spot though. I had some hot sake brought to me at a restaurant and it was amazing. Try it hot

Life is so dull without some form of drug. Caffeine or alcohol. Why are sober humans so boring :(