I am a 31 year old shut-in hermit NEET, I dropped out of Highschool at age 16 and have been this way ever since.
For the last 2 years I have been seeing Clinical Psychologists in order to try "fix me" to stop being a hermit shut-in NEET.
The problem is, none of it has done anything to help me, not a single bit. In fact I feel worse now knowing 2 years of therapy has done nothing to help me get better at all, it makes me think that I am legitimately fucked for life.
Try Ritalin lol
This helps so much for everything. I personally have a prescription for Concerta which helped me to get motivated and enthusiastic about working and actually accomplishing something
Adderall works great but it's losing effects. Has anyone tried Focalin Ritalin didn't help me.
>In fact I feel worse now knowing 2 years of therapy has done nothing to help me get better at all, it makes me think that I am legitimately fucked for life.
This is why therapy is harmful for robots. They are trying to fit you into a society you don't belong when the best way to deal with it is to accept what you are and continue living as you do without shame.
I'm gonna tell you right now. Live life as you live it now and you'll never change, therapy doesn't work, bullshit goal setting doesn't work, even if you miraculously get money that won't change anything.
For years I didn't understand. I understood that people do things, they work, they make money, they sleep, they get up, they clean, they fuck, they die. I thought that was how it worked and how it was going to work for me, that I was gonna be thrown into the world and it was gonna spit me out like everyone else. But I was never thrown into the world. People started judging me, thinking something was wrong with
me, that I was a creep, that I did nothing, and couldn't do anything.
I began reading stories, looking to history about how people did great things, but what I only ever saw, was the function, what they did, how they did it, and why the failed.
I never understood motivation, and it seems no one in this world does, because everyday people would tell me to get up and do things, to get on with my life as if the idea of me doing things was enough of a reason for me to do things.
I'd always hear about these stories of how people were forced to change their lives when they had kids. How they turned from homeless hippies into responsible adults. I thought about why my own mother works, why she let me stay home, and why she wants me to leave.
I know it's obvious, I realized, she does all of that for me. She got a job to pay for the extra expenses of having a child, she lets me stay home because she doesn't want me to live out on the streets, she tells me to do things because she thinks that will make me succeed, she has a responsibility to me to be my mother.
to be continued...
Hey OP. From my experience the chance of success with psychotherapy if you have real problems like ours is very very small. You decide if it's worth the money and the time and the hope you spend on it.
Have you researched anhero methods?
That's what I was missing, responsibility, my parents do things because they're responsible for something, my parents are happy when they succeed in their responsibility (when I do well, win contests, get good grades, etc), and sad when they don't (me being a neet).
Even linguistically being responsible is the same word for being responsible for something. If you want to do things, if you want to get out of this viciously sad cycle, find what you have to be responsible for.
Even after this realization it took me a long time to find someone or something I was motivated to commit myself to, but I eventually found what I was looking for, first in my sister, and then in my girlfriend (when I got better).
So this is how we fit into society robots, find something to be responsible for.
You describe finding external meaning. The thing is, it's hard to find it when you can't connect to people because you have been deeply traumatized. You weren't that bad to begin with
It's always hard to find it user, I didn't feel a responsibility for anyone for a long time until the day my own sister tried shoving a bottle of pills down her throat.
Don't expect it to be easy, don't expect to have any options right now, don't think that it's impossible for you, because it isn't, it's just hard, as it is for everyone.
Just start thinking about the people in your life, your relationship to them, and their meaning to you. If you can't think of people, think of things, of people, things about yourself, there's no right way to do it.
Nazis find their responsibility in their race, lgbt people find responsibility in providing "safe spaces" for their community. Just think. You only fail in finding meaning when you stop thinking about it and you stop searching for it.
Learn to enjoy the sadness. I was a normie once. And slowly fell out, and the period of time after my fall out was nostalgic and melancholic. Eventually a girl pulled me out again and I was back to being a normie faggot. But regardless of what I did I missed that lonely feeling. Maybe I got caught up in all the normie shit idk, but the girl left. After 6 years, I somewhat attribute it to the constant thoughts of how I want to be alone for the reat of my life. Eventually I let our relationship dry up because of that. But I'm back to being a neet, lonely sad guy. As much as I hate it. I love it at the same time.
The thing is I'm not paying for the Therapy.
Im in Australia and I got 20 tax payer funded sessions per year with a Clinical Psychologist of my choosing.
The person I am seeing right now is writing a report for me for disability, I think they gave up trying to help me and just want me to get on some kind of benefit.
How can you be responsible for something when your own life is out of order?
You have to fix yourself before you can bring other people into your life.
Like the druggo single mother who has a kid thinking it will force her to change to be a better person
Try listening to the audible book The Great Leap by Gay Hendricks. That guy is a top tier clinical psychologist who coaches executives.
That's the point, you can't be responsible for something when your life is out of order, which is what forces you to put it in order. You aren't a druggo mother, you aren't creating more problems believing they'll miraculously solve your own. (although, some druggo mothers do change)
I've being going to a psychologist for over a year now and before that I've been seeing one for 3 years tried 10 meds and CBT therapy and I'm worse somehow so don't expect anything but I did get disability which is cool
This.
As much as I fantasize about having a gf and a good, fulfilling life, Everytime something like that comes my way, a girl, a good job, an opportunity, I push it away because deep down, im comfy in the sadness. In the melancholy days, sitting by myself listening to music or whatever and not talking. At least thinking I'm something deeper than the average normie. I'm a drug addict as well and as much as being an IV heroin user makes me fear for my life and the ever-decreasing hope for the future, I realize it's not even the drug that I like so much that keeps me doing it, its the life and almost "sheek" pain-filled, dark, muddy, misery inducing life that comes with it. As much as I "want" to have a good life, I really don't think I do. It's just what everyone around me wants because they think I'll be happy. But they can't seem to get that I LIKE being miserable. I like the fact that I might OD and die incredibly young after a torturous battle with addiction, and the wake of pain it will leave in my family and life after I'm gone. I want to be immersed in it. I think "good" and "bad", "happiness" and "misery" are just sides of a coin. For life to flow naturally, some people are looking for one and endlessly searching for it, and others accept and FEEL the pain. Life is all about FEELING things, just experiencing things as they are and not distorting it trying to conceptualize everything.
Can't relate to drug use but I'm happy someone gets how I feel. I was a bit of an alcoholic for a bit, but I just couldn't keep up getting drunk everyday. Eventually the drinking made me feel better about things. Which is what I didn't want.
The only reasons to see psychologists/therapists is documentation so you can collect NEETbucks and scrips for fun pills. Play the game correctly son. Milk th system for all its worth.
Do you think we get worse because before you go, you still have at least some hope, even if its a drop in the ocean of hope. But then you actually get the treatment from multiple different people and nothing changes, and that last drop of hope you had is basically gone because you're basically doing something thats the "last line of defense" treatment.
Ehh unironically though if you can't be helped by therapy you were really better off not going. Kind of a flaw in the system.
This shit doesn't any sense in my perspective.
Yeah I take pleasure in getting high, since it's the only pleasure I get, but the majority of the time is miserable.