>go to gym >cashier starts talking to me >compliments my shirt >"oh you can get a closer look at it over lunch" >"okay where are we going?" >FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF wasn't prepared for this response >after I'm done working out I talk to her for a bit and we get to Japanese food
She is a super chipper and outgoing person and she likes me enough to agree to this. She's always been nice to me but I thought that was her work persona or her personality. Jesus christ I'm super happy she accepted but I feel like in my heart I fucked up wildly. She calls herself a "weirdo" so I don't think I can fuck up by sperging... Also this will happen on Tuesday and I have her number. When should I send her the first text...?
Bros, tell me this is gonna be alright. I feel like it will go well but not in the way that I want it to.
Pic related. How I felt while it was happening versus reflecting on it.
Okay user, don't send her much at all. Let her scare herself with her game plan by herself. Acknowledge you're happy about the date and that you're curious to learn more about her. Then go radio silent if possible until then. If she asks why you don't respond to a message, respond a day late that you've been busy and issue a light apology.
This is all so that she feels like you're not hooked on her and feels like she has something to prove to you. If the date goes even just alright, she'll feel great about all of it because she was worried you were losing interest in her. This sounds manipulative, but doing almost anything else could lower your chances.
Parker Parker
>Bros, tell me this is gonna be alright. nope, i'll tell you that this can or cannot be alright, just try your best expecting the worst, so you don't get disappointed if it doesn't work out don't be timid or introvert if you really want her, and if you can get her, well, congratulations, i'll be a normalfag
In my honest opinion if you try to hard to voer analyze this youre gonna fuck it up. I say jsut be honest, tell her you like her but youre nervous. If you try and act like a chad its gonna be far worse than if youre just honest.
Julian Murphy
Do 30-40% of the talking and try to be actually interested in her and ask follow-up questions. If one of her interests sparks an idea for a second date, schedule it at the end of it, it will show her that you know how take initiative and that you actually listened to what she had to say. if there's any dead air during the date, use an open question to start it again - you can google "open questions" or "questions to fall in love" there's lots of them that are perfectly acceptable for people to get to know each other and can spark interesting conversations.
The most important part though is to actually enjoy yourself and learn to relax and talk to her like you would with any friend or acquaintance, if you're tense, it will show and make her uncomfortable. Just repeat to yourself that you're gonna be ok, that she's just another human being and that if she showed interest, someone else might do the same later even if you fuck it up.
Worst case scenario: you acquire useful dating experience and you're one step closer to the love of your life.
Godspeed user!
Luke Evans
Especially this part about acting like she is just another human being. I have noticed over the years that robots try to act like the women they are interested in are some special sort of creature that must be treated differently than regular humans.
Ryder Howard
It's not just robots, the whole PUA scene is built around the idea that women are machines that you can hack. The only valuable advice these morons have is just basic social cues and advice for people who have trouble talking to others. All the bullshit about "shit-tests" or made-up trash like that should be disregarded and will do nothing but lower your chances.
Isaac Bennett
When a guy only does a small proportion of the talking, he seems uninterested and i assume he doesnt really want to talk to me. In your case she was the one that proposed to go somewhere so if you dont talk to her properly she'll think of you as some sort of Chad. So funny how men complain when women play hard to get but then tell each other to do exactly that. Just be yourself and be honest to her.
Jayden Walker
This is fine in theory but I'm gonna go to the gym at least twice before the date. I guess I can make up something about not paying attention to my phone.
Thanke
We've had enough interactions already. SHe knows I'm not Chad. You're right though I'll focus on other things until then.
>Do 30-40% of the talking and try to be actually interested in her and ask follow-up questions. That's how it was during our brief convo last night. Mostly her divulging things and me making jokes and inquiries. That went well and without her coworkers around, making me nervous hopefully it will go better when it's just us.
I do that with most people. They seem to love talking to me and I mostly ask questions and say little about myself. When it happens like this, when I actually hang out with a person is when they'll start to ask things back but most of the interactions I have with people are them talking to me and they seem to enjoy it and open up to me most of the time. Men and Women.
Juan King
>When a guy only does a small proportion of the talking, he seems uninterested and i assume he doesnt really want to talk to me. In your case she was the one that proposed to go somewhere so if you dont talk to her properly she'll think of you as some sort of Chad. Firstly, 40% is not a small amount. Secondly, this rule of thumb is mostly there to keep in mind that the conversation should be about the two persons. Men famously tend to go on and on about their interests if they're allowed to.
>So funny how men complain when women play hard to get but then tell each other to do exactly that. Just be yourself and be honest to her. Nice false dichotomy you got there. You can both not be a clingy fuck and keep interest high by limiting interactions until the date happens and also be 100% honest with her. Also nothing that's been said was about being hard to get, it's about containing your impulse to flood her with one-way social contact, which is sometimes hard to do for some in the giddy state of catching the interest of a cute girl.
Cameron Sanders
Saturday text to confirm it's still on (likely to lead to text convo, if it does then again on sunday) maybe again on Tuesday before going to double check that it's still on (if you're paranoid)
Ayden Diaz
>it's about containing your impulse to flood her with one-way social contact, which is sometimes hard to do for some in the giddy state of catching the interest of a cute girl. Yes. Tris is what it boils down to with me.
If this kind of approach works out for you you're unironically a Chad and should leave forever.
Ryan Lewis
>t. guy who didn't attempt to talk to a girl for 7 years
Brayden Richardson
SHit I just thought of something. I sweat a lot when nervous and when I go to class or just out in general I usually take my bookbag and have extra shirts. I was planning on wearing nice pants and a shirt and I don't think my regular jansport will mesh with that. Damn it .
I spent months building rapport and being pleasant and funny. I don't think Chad does that.
Jordan Bell
okay, sounds like you need a femanon's advice here. all these retards telling you to not text her/let her chase you are wrong. most women like to be chased. make her feel like she's sought after. if a girl texts you and you wait hours to respond, you're an asshole and she knows what you're doing. nobody thinks you're creepy for responding in a minute or two, I promise.
now, you can definitely come across as obsessive if you don't leave her alone. start the first conversation, but let her start the second. talk about what she wants to talk about (even and especially if she wants to talk about you!), that way you get to know each other better.
don't make her ask you on the second date. maybe the third, but most women don't see it as our responsibility to ask men out (sure, this is wrong, but it's how it is). ask what she's doing a week or two from now, schedule something fun.
good luck user. godspeed.
Blake Kelly
>getting a date with no effort at all I'm not sure that boards.Jow Forums.org/r9k is the right place for you. I recommend facebook.com or perhaps reddit.com instead.
Carson Martin
Like i said it was months of being nice and funny to her. I know I'm not as bad off as most guys here because I'm deathly afraid of rejection and I have to do all of my flirting under the pretense that its a joke or else what little of my ego that I have gets destroyed. So far i have sperged my way out of most women's attention so i kinda do belong here.
She told me how much she likes my school's library but shes not a student so i think I'll try to sneak her in there for a "second date." Does that sound good?
Cooper Lee
no you don't normalfag, maybe in /b/ but no on Jow Forums
