30+?

Please don't let this thread die because I'm stuck up shit's creek without a paddle and I just need to hear some responses.

Yesterday was my birthday, I turned 34, and I'm a mentally ill neet who does nothing but play video games, browse the internet and watch T. V..

My dad was 28 when he got married and my brother (who's 2 years older than me) has 2 kids who are around 9 and 12. When I was talking to them I realized they know all the games that I play, and seemed like they didn't want to talk about playing them more for fear of messing with my head.

But it seems like there's nothing else for me to do. It's not like there's other video games for me to play and getting an unskilled job will leave me with all the same problems just more like having my knees crack every time I bend them (which happened to me the last time I got a job.) The only jobs I could get would be working a grocery store or a gas station since all office work requires some sort of degree.

When Paramore - Riot! was release Hayley was half my age plus 7 which means she was the ideal dating age for me, and like me she's also short. She was mia waifu until After Laughter was released which left me feeling jaded, and after seeing a video of her at Parahoy 3 youtube.com/watch?v=x15XgVW4mQY it's become apparent she's hit the wall.

Then about a month ago after staying up all night I was smitten by a Twitch streamer who is currently half my age plus 7 youtube.com/watch?v=1V8t_iFnPDM who had B. P. D. and wanted to start a D. B. T. group. Then upon watching her stream she Red Pills me by implying all men are autistic and later said suicide attempts are all about attention.

Anarchy for The U. K. by The Sex Pistols talks about how there's no future, well I've gotten there, and now I don't have a present. I've been gradually coming to terms with this realization, and I'd like to start working on hobbies like Guitar, Chess and Creative Writing but I might not be able to do that.

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>but I might not be able to do that
why not user?

I suggest you logging into Grindr and finding a BF you could at least get TOPPED by another autistic robot and have someone to talk too

Well right now I think I could, but anytime I start browsing Wikipedia or playing Chess I always revert to the low effort shit posting here. Or if I think about playing guitar I'll instead start playing video games.

Things like watching T. V. or browsing the internet are all high stimuli, instant gratification activities compared to say reading or studying a song. I've been trying to quit smoking for years, and each time I've gone back to smoking my will power gets a little weaker. I've basically classically conditioned myself to give up at the first sign of adversity and revert back to the path of least resistance.

Who knows, maybe I'll be able to do it. Posts like are so crude it gives me a negative impression of Jow Forums. For example one time n /mu/ there was a thread on Paramore and I was so offended I didn't come back for like a week.

Whenever I talk about leaving this site there's always someone who tells me to leave, but it's an addiction. Human beings are social animals and just talking to someone else fulfills a basic need: youtube.com/watch?v=FtJjVPP1xmg

If entertainment is food then personal expression is breathing.

dude , being a neet for a year was the best time of my life,

becoming a wageslave was a mistake, I hate everything and everyone and dont even have time to stay healthy anymore, wagecucking ruined my life,

I hope the world get hits by a meteor tomorow

Don't compare yourself with other people.
It makes it too easy to say "Well, I'm already too old to succeed. Why even bother now?"
It seems like your main problem is motivation. Every time you said you wanted to do something, a half hearted excuse follows why you can't do it.
Why don't you start small with your hobbies. Like, only write for 5 minutes today. Do that for a week and write 10 minutes every day the following week. It doesn't have to be great or even any good, but just write whatever.
It will train your attention span and you'll be able to motivate yourself more.

>I've basically classically conditioned myself to give up at the first sign of adversity and revert back to the path of least resistance.
I know how this feels user. I don't really have any solution to share with you except the basic retarded stuff like "incremental steps your way to ubermensch bruh", "dude gym LMAO" and shit like that.
But if you want to talk some more I'll listen.

I think if life ever got this bad for me, I'd just waltz off into the forest in some remote area and survive on my own for as long as I could. Still considering it, honestly, and I will most likely to continue making 6 figures the rest of my life.

Having money doesn't really matter, user. It's your frame of mind that matters.

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I had a therapist who talked about "The new normal" and part of being a neet is lowering your expectations. I can't even afford to go out to dinner so getting a gf is out since I wouldn't even be able to go dutch on dates. With quitting smoking after I failed enough times I decided to go every hour and a half for a month, then every 2 hours for a month and every 3 hours for a month so I should apply that strategy to my hobbies. Because I don't have a job I literally have almost no endurance. Just cleaning my apartment leaves me exhausted, and after writing for maybe half an hour I'm spent. I think I'll time myself and decide to just f'ing do it for 30 minutes a day every day.

Something I've noticed with addictions which applies to any self-improvement is you have to do reps. Just starting is difficult where you have all kinds of low effort activities you could do instead, and the more reps you do the stronger you get. Another term I use interchangeably is "doing reps" is "learning by doing" and when adversity strikes you have to learn how to pound through the turmoil by doing. Learning by doing is always a traumatic experience and just like lifting you "no pain no gain."

I have a dumbbell which I gone through phases of using, but usually I get shooting pain whenever I use it. About 5 years ago I could do this workout youtube.com/watch?v=B38ttorbISM then upon doing it a couple months ago I got back spasms from it. Maybe I'll start running after the winter passes, but working out is good for mental development and strengthening your resolve.

I'm afraid of ending up homeless. My E. B. T. went from $160 a month to $132 a month for no reason, and if I ever lost my S. S. I. I'd be out on the streets.

I often wonder how ironic it would be if life in the forest was actually more enjoyable than this weird economic slavery that we all participate in day-in and day-out. Would be super ironic.