I am being mentally torn apart by forces beyond my control. thoughts are being tampered with in my head...

i am being mentally torn apart by forces beyond my control. thoughts are being tampered with in my head. i cannot trust my family, i camnot have them address me without feeling annoyed. i cannot act rationally. i cannot speak to anyone normally. i cannot think of anything other than drugs that would help. i fucking hate living like this, how does it get better? this is no state for a man to be in, this is not a life.

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Pray to God to remove your egoism and replace it with altruism.

my relationship with God is fickle, my view of the divine often gets clouded seemingly for no reason

>often gets clouded seemingly for no reason
That's your egoism blocking you from receiving God's light.
Try the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6).

cease your consumption of psychoactive substances, save for perhaps caffeine

i'll look into that

i already have except occasional weed which im stopping too and cigarettes. but i'll never forget how coke and xanax and molly makes it feel ok for a while

also perhaps try kratom. 2-3g of green or white helps me a TON.

Just don't get addicted to like 10g/day, I've heard that's just pure ass.

Does MDMA really help with this?

>trusting anyone who wants to modify you

>Does MDMA really help with this?
MDMA feels nice but no, in the long run it does the opposite of help. Look up effects of MDMA abuse on bluelight or something, it's horrible. It basically fucks your serotonin system for a long ass time making it very hard chemically to feel happy.

In fact, man's soul already exists in its perfected state in the world of Ein Sof. The replacement of egoism with altruism is the right-hand path to re-attaining perfection, but nobody is forcing you to pray.

i don't want to start doing more drugs any buzz just makes me crave stronger drugs in the end.

it just makes me feel good for a while, it doesn't help

>i don't want to start doing more drugs any buzz just makes me crave stronger drugs in the end.
fair enough. good luck to you my friend, maybe we'll see the light one day

thanks mate, if you haven't already nevwr try cocaine you'll crave it forever

I already have. I'm not really the type to get addicted, but you're definitely right. It's probably not worth ever doing that first line.

There are literally billions of egotistical people out there who do not suffer these symptoms. I don't think it's correlated with that.

Are you lacking sleep or have a bad diet? Try fixing that and the odd 'paranormal' feelings should go away

if you're getting watery/fatty shits, constipation, etc, it's not paranormal, it's your gut flora. just an FYI.

i sleep about 8 hours a night and i eat home cooked meals mostly

i have been getting nasty shits but this is nothing new i'm a diagnosed schizo

There are also billions of people that subscribe to some sort of religious thought.
Sure am getting a lot of pushback. What the hell guys, any sort of positive introspection is good for you.

start eating salads daily sweetheart

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Lol, I get that more out of Buddhism than I do Christianity.

They're the same thing for the most part.

It's actually very disappointing

sometimes it be like what it do like be