ITT we all live in Norilsk, Russia

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little cyka? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the spetsnaz, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on chechens, and I have over 420 confirmed kills. I am trained in vodka warfare and I'm the top sniper east of the ural river. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, nahui. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the rassiya federatia and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, blyat. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with a potato. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Vooruzhonnije Sily and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the motherland, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking smert, blyat.

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tldr?sorry imma little overweight

I'm from Michigan, it sounds pretty much the same as here

Chto, chert voz'mi, ty tol'ko chto, chert voz'mi, skazal obo mne, malen'kiy kroshka? YA khochu, chtoby vy znali, chto ya poluchil vyssheye obrazovaniye v svoyem spetsnaze, uchastvoval v mnogochislennykh sekretnykh reydakh na chechentsev, i u menya boleye 420 podtverzhdennykh ubiystv. YA obuchen vodochnoy voyne, i ya glavnyy snayper k vostoku ot reki Ural. Ty dlya menya nichto inoye, kak yeshche odna tsel'. YA unichtozhu tebya, chert voz'mi, s tochnost'yu, podobnoy kotoroy yeshche nikogda ne videli na etoy Zemle, zapomni moi grebanyye slova. Vy dumayete, chto mozhete skazat', chto eto der'mo dlya menya cherez Internet? Podumay yeshche raz, Nakhui. Poka my govorim, ya svyazyvayus' so svoyey sekretnoy set'yu shpionov po vsey federatsii Rossiya, i vash IP otslezhivayetsya pryamo seychas, chtoby vy luchshe podgotovilis' k shtormu, oparysh. Burya, kotoraya unichtozhayet zhalkuyu meloch', kotoruyu ty nazyvayesh' svoyey zhizn'yu. Ty chertovski mertv, blyat'. YA mogu byt' gde ugodno, v lyuboye vremya, i ya mogu ubit' tebya boleye chem sem'yustami sposobami, i eto tol'ko s kartofelem. YA ne tol'ko khorosho obuchen rukopashnomu boyu, no u menya yest' dostup ko vsemu arsenalu Vooruzhennykh sil, i ya budu v polnoy mere ispol'zovat' yego dlya togo, chtoby steret' vashu zhalkuyu zadnitsu s litsa Rodiny, malen'koye der'mo. Yesli by vy tol'ko znali, kakoye nechestivoye vozmezdiye sobiralos' obrushit' na vas vash malen'kiy umnyy kommentariy, vozmozhno, vy by sderzhali svoy grebanyy yazyk. No ty ne mog, ty ne sdelal, i teper' ty rasplachivayesh'sya, chertov idiot. YA naplyunu yarost' na tebya, i ty utonesh' v etom. Ty chertovski smert, blyat'.

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it is probably similar in many ways but in USA you have some sense of belonging in a community and you have entertainment for you. here everyone is scared of the other person (remnants of the soviets) for he might be in state security and there is no enterainment except for being drunk and if you have a girlfriend then sex

Ja ne dumal, cto ne ponjal, no u menja ne bylo voli k

Sounds the same as where I live

Here is the unofficial Norilsk tourism page that was taken offline

web.archive.org/web/20121113053536/http://www.norilskrussia.net/

i wanna die of hypothermia.
i think im gonna stay out here for a few days & let myself freeze to death

Every since the iron mine and Project Sanguine shut down, there is NOTHING to do in Republic except get drunk and have sex. And I'm related to 95% of the town. And yes, I have sex with some of that 95% because we have to.

>So clean, blue and transparent is the air above Norilsk that when standing on tippy toes Sarah Palin can be seen just above the horizon.
Lmao

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A friend of mine who has lived in both Russia and the American Midwest says the similarities are striking. I assume the folks in the Russian wilderness are a little harder edged though.

>and suntan on the pristine shores of the Arctic Ocean
Norilsk sits 325 km INLAND from the Kara Sea and the Gulf of Yenisey.

No incest stuff, but the cold, decline of industry, and heavy alcoholism/drug abuse is pretty much the same. There's also definitely not a sense of community outside small towns, after Detroit went south in the 60s there's not a whole lot of trust between strangers

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Cousin fucking in the UP is pretty much an open secret. My town was so small, we didn't have a football team and I got my varsity letter in FISHING. The whole town was pretty much 3rd gen Finns and almost all of us took a cousin (2nd cousin if we were lucky) to Prom with all our dads handing us condoms and saying, "Don't you dare get her pregnant." I was lucky enough to take my cousin from from Dukes to my prom so no one knew we were related which made me the Cool Kid that night.

Well fuck I stand corrected, god damn Finns are always up to something. If it wasn't obvious from my post I live in a city in the lower peninsula. Not Detroit but not much better.

>The people of Norilsk are saints not yet canonized. Long hours of work in nickel mines bring them a modest paycheck, much of which is donated to charity. If you ever decide to visit the city of Norilsk, there is no need to bring food or money. A Norilsk smelter operator would give his last potato to a hungry traveler.

sounds weirdly comfy

>tfw got last bottle of vodka from store and now getting drunk in my apartment watching game videos on Youtube (>tfw no more rutube) at 480p.

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>3rd gen Finns
Do they speak Finnish?

Some of us do. Mine is passable enough that when I visit family in the Fatherland, strangers/waitresses are shocked to learn I'm American (they presume I'm Fenno-Swede when I first speak because it is obvious it's not my native tongue but only Fenno-Swedes would be non-Finnish speakers who would know Finnish). Many of our grandparents spoke Finnish at home so a lot of us know the basics. I call my dad isa and my mom aiti out of normal course.

It's perfectly legal in Finland, actually, so I guess we were just carrying on the old traditions of the Fatherland.

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guy from novy urengoy here
100% of norilsk page is lies
the stupidest one so far "Immigrants arrive in Norilsk from all over the former Soviet Union and the world. After the 2008 financial crisis, thousands of American refugees fled to Norilsk in search of a better life and a piece of the Russian Dream."

Looks like the moon desu

this is fine

*sips luminescent green fish soup*

It obviously was a joke, chill