Can a woman ever be attracted to and love a lonely man?

>Wouldn't say we're codependent.

No, you wouldn't. Besides, I believe we've already had this argument.

Thanks, brother.
I'm thinking of starting a community of guys like us, so that we can grow together, inspire each other, even meet up.

Thanks.

Both partners can help heal each other's wounds.
However, I am a bit worried that a girl could leave me once I "fix her".

Also a girl who was a weird kid who grew up into a weird adult. The loneliness was more of a self induced variety though.

I'm actually still kind of uncomfortable around non-lonely people. Or rather, I can feel my life energy being drained away around them. I think loner people tend to attract lonely people, because that's the majority of the people who talk to me still.

Nope especially if you mope a lot like I do.Trying to fix that.Just not having something to look foward to except a gun license to off your self is pretty depressing.

I doubt.
I'm seeing a therapist for my own problems who never raised any concerns about my relationship. I frankly don't think you're more qualified to judge my mental health than a professional I talk to every week.

I don't think partners fix each other. I don't even feel the need to be fixed.
I think partners support and understand each other. And I doubt someone will leave if you truly understand one another.

>The loneliness was more of a self induced variety though.
My loneliness was always feeling out of place. I'm pretty likeable, I just never connect with anyone and never could be honest about who I am with anyone. He's the first person I can be myself with.
I can relate with the fact that I feel comfy and I don't feel drained by him.

>I frankly don't think you're more qualified to judge my mental health than a professional I talk to every week.

Bet you 100 bucks you haven't told that therapist everything though.

>I don't think partners fix each other. I don't even feel the need to be fixed.
>I think partners support and understand each other. And I doubt someone will leave if you truly understand one another.

Thing is that once one of them becomes better they suddenly have much higher SMV and a lot more people that approach them and so on. Potentially while you then perceive that your bf/gf is a lot worse than the people that are paying attention to you now

>His problems are much more complicated than mine and can't really be solved just with love, encouragement and support, which he gets plenty of.
>He needs professional support.

Love, encouragement, and support don't solve problems. They're more like icing on a cake. They're nice, but not necessary. The cake itself is actually manning the fuck up, gritting your teeth, and resolving yourself to tackling your problems.

If he's getting all this support, and still needs professional fucking help, I've got some bad news for you. He has no interest in improving himself. Do yourself a favour and end the relationship. If you want to continue supporting him, do it as a friend, not a lover. He doesn't need a girlfriend right now, he needs some god damn impetus to get off his ass and stop feeling sorry for himself.

>I'm seeing a therapist for my own problems.
You're not helping your case any.

>I think loner people tend to attract lonely people
I'm a loner who never dated anyone, so I can't speam about that.
However, most of the friends that I've had at certain points in my life, were social guys, sometimes even popular.
They used to hang out with me in the side, enjoying the deep conversations we used tonhave.
Unfortunately, I used to get needy, wanting to spend more time together, while they had tons of other friends waiting.

I rember, one time in high school, I had plans with my friend.
We while we were hanging out, hus girlfriend called him to tell him she was alone at home, calling him to come over and fuck her.

Shit like this sucked.

They notice your subconscious yearning and desire for companionship. This character trait is not found in prime male specimens and is therefore shunned.

It's not over for you, it never even begun.

>I don't think partners fix each other.
You misunderstood.

Their love and support can help an individual heal up from past traumas.
This can result in a more functional behavior.

This is "fixing", in a way.

Why would I lie to my therapist? I don't get anything out of therapy if I lie or omit stuff.
There's nothing he has done that I'm ashamed of admitting.

If you think all problems in life can be solved by "manning the fuck up", you're deluded and you had a very easy life.

The bond I have with my boyfriend is something else. I wouldn't care if the best man on the paper approaches me and asked me to marry him, the thing I have with my boyfriend is the truest and only real thing I've ever had.

>The bond I have with my boyfriend is something else. I wouldn't care if the best man on the paper approaches me and asked me to marry him, the thing I have with my boyfriend is the truest and only real thing I've ever had.

Nothing but infatuation bubbling. It will fade. You are even showing signs that you were believing these things in the past about other boyfriends, but it is oh so much different now.

>I don't get anything out of therapy if I lie or omit stuff.

Good girl. You're spot on.

>You are even showing signs that you were believing these things in the past about other boyfriends
Where are those signs?
Can you quote them?

Why do you people always feel the need to explain to me how I feel and everything about my life?
No, I never felt this way or believed these things about anyone else.

I never lied or omitted anything relevant, dumbass. I don't see the point. I spend good money and I go there out of my own will, I care about it being beneficial.
I talked to my doctor about the difficulties I have in my relationship, she never raised any concerns about it being unhealthy.

>Why do you people always feel the need to explain to me how I feel and everything about my life?

Because I have seen it time and time again. Yes your feelings right now are real. No they are not accurate. No they will not last. It is not the nature of feelings that make someone holier than everyone else.

>is something else
>truest and only real thing I've ever had.

There is still the off chance that this is her first time showing these feelings for someone. But this reeks of a comparison to past relationships. And women often, after breaking up, flick a switch and change how they feel and think about the past.

"If true love is permanent and real, and I am not feeling true love for this person, but rather disdain and anger, then I must be feeling this way because of who they are. They make me feel bad, so they cannot be good. And since this person makes me feel bad I could not have loved them, because I would never love somebody who makes me feel bad (the qualities he exhibits now must have been inherent qualities he has always had). So I must have never loved them. The entire relationship must have been a lie. Real true love would be permanent, and this is not permanent, so it was never real true love."

This is an example of the thought pattern post breakup with someone.

I had one other relationship. I never felt this way about him.
Through all our relationship, since probably 2 months in, I raised the concern I couldn't relate to him, I felt lonely around him, I couldn't communicate with him, I couldn't be myself with him. Which is one of the main reasons why I broke up with him.
I didn't stop feeling strongly about him after the break up, I really never did. The break up didn't even hurt because being alone felt better than being lonely while dating him, I just felt sorry for wasting his time.

Did the first guy take your virginity?

No. My boyfriend did.

This could be true. But it is also precisely how you would feel about your past relationship now if you went through that thought pattern, in which case it probably was not all that bad.

Doesn't change your feelings most likely being way over the top for the guy you are with now. If you are interested in staying with him you should try to realize this and not expect your feelings to stay this way. They almost certainly won't.

>If you think all problems in life can be solved by "manning the fuck up", you're deluded and you had a very easy life.

Realistically, a lot of them can. I never said it was easy either, just doable.
A good chunk of suffering in people's lives are a result of their own actions and mentalities. Just because I recognize this doesn't mean I've had an easy life. Sorry I'm not like most people in your life who, judging by your attitude, like to skirt around the topic of personal responsibility.

>I never lied or omitted anything relevant, dumbass.

Oh jesus christ, relax. You're touchy.

I was agreeing with you, not trying to aggravate you.

There was a thread on hating shy girls, there are a lot of women that only attract abuse and can't make friends or steady boyfriends, they're usually poor and come from neglectful homes.

Do they pick abusive boyfriends over lonely kind dudes?

Yes, a lot of them can. Not all of them. Not all of his.
I'm all for personal responsibility, he's not in a place where he can man up out of his problems. He can "man up" out of some, and he did. Not all of them, he needs doctors. We're working on a plan to get him some.

I always felt like that. I never changed my mind, I ended my relationship because of how I felt about it.
If I changed my mind about it after the break up, I wouldn't have broken up because of them.
It wasn't a bad relationship, he wasn't an asshole or anything, we got along - it just didn't feel right for me.

>If you are interested in staying with him you should try to realize this and not expect your feelings to stay this way
I have more for him beside my feelings for him. He's a great person and we get along more than I've ever gotten along with anyone.
I love that my feelings for him are absolutely over the top, I hope they stay this way, if they don't I'll cherish the way I felt for him for so long and won't leave his side unless he does something horrible to me.

Sorry, your previous post seemed sarcastic.

There was a screen cap/essay about failing to develop social skills.
Something about how friends are like money, you have to have money to make money.
You have to have friends to make friends,
At some point everyone will have someone else and you'll be a background character to everyone.
Faces will start to blur, young old, male female it will all seem like a blur.
You will be undesirable and you will stay undesirable and the only way out is suicide.

I know that feel all too well my man. This world shows no understanding to people like us so we're left to fend for ourselves and fight with the might of god to achieve success that comes to other naturally. I'm not even sure I'll make it anymore, but I still have plenty of fight left in me. I'm about to go to therapy for that specific issue too. I hope it can help me.

Just know you are not alone.

>Sorry, your previous post seemed sarcastic.

No harm done lass! I understand why it appeared that way.

You can't tell how kind someone is going to be when they're alone with you, or you take what you can get

people dislike you for being an autistic weirdo, not for being lonely

Meanwhile in real life my crush (a lonely suicidal girl) thinks I'm creepy and annoying because I even want to talk to her.

Yes, of course. Is that even a question anymore?

>Why do you think women fawn over Ryan Gosling when almost every role he plays is as a silent, lonely and even awkward guy.
Because he's an attractive, tall, established movie star? The reason it's attractive is because the roast can capitalize on it. In nature, chad only stays in that state for a blink, so they have to make their move NOW. Most loneliness is given to the same schmucks that nobody cares about.
Imagine you saw a Mclaren F1 or something on blocks in someone's yard, and all it needed was a cheap tune up. You'd be much more interested than if you saw someone's 1980s Toyota rusting in the driveway.
The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

Attached: just.jpg (540x720, 33K)

iktfbtbqhwymfm, people like us were just destined for failure. We just have to live with it until the end and hope for the best, even if the world seems like it is falling apart

Catch-22, law of the jungle, and positive feedback loops. We never had a chance.

>even if the world seems like it is falling apart
This is our chance. We can get into survivalism, start tribes after everything falls, We can take over the world.

Then, we will distribute world's remaining pussy fairly, among us, brothers.

If we conquer other communities, we will have ridiculous amounts of pussy.
Having 3 personal breeding whores (wives) for every one of us will probably be realistic.

3 wives for everyone (approximately):
>1 hottie
>1 mediocre
>1 kind of ugly, but hey, more pussy and more breeding

It's pretty painful to be expected to be strong all the time in such a world, also WTF is 'spastic'?

this, our gene pool would not get stagnant either because of this. based survivor user

>trusting the psychological health system where they can't actually say what they're thinking in straight talk at any time because liability

Feels bad, user. Every time I've had to deal with that, I'd act like I was just like the normies and that I expected it. The moment you show jealous, they know you're a faggot of some sort or another.

In short, this is 'just world' theory, which is the result of naive thinking, such as cartoon logic, religion, and profit-driven-science. The ends do not justify the means, and the result does not prove any one of the hypotheses. It's mixing u p correlation with causation, and it's sad to see how many people think in this backwards way.

And likewise, the ladder is rigged and you cannot learn or obtain the goal through other means because it IS the means, it is the center from which other skills are developed.

I actually intend on starting a community for this.

I'll let you all know when I develop some good plans.
Maybe we'll have a discord, kik group, a fucking website, we'll see.

It's time for us, neckbeards, losers, nerds, NEETs, betas, weebs, abandoned ones, to rise up and claim what belongs to us.

They would not take our love, our kindness, our passion, our hearts, our bodies, our protection, our souls.

They rejected it all.
They acted like we don't exist.
They didn't see us as human.

Now, we will not see them as human.
We will use pussy as a resource, like it was meant to be used.

>The moment you show jealous, they know you're a faggot of some sort or another.
Even though the only reason you're jealous is because you are alone and sad.

Woman only "love" money, looks, and sometimes their children.

Why doesn't anyone ITT take this as a chance to play life on hard mode? Life is very easy for normos, but there's not much fun in that. Wouldn't you get to feel real accomplishment if you dug yourself out of this and were rewarded with a normal healthy life?

Attached: f3xwu46z8wx11.jpg (750x732, 69K)

How in the actual fuck is that fair?
I can't look at it that way.

Knew I had it stashed somewhere

Attached: Don't ask for help.jpg (807x5318, 983K)

No. Loneliness implies a lack of status, which means girls will not be interested in you. You need to offer them something in return for them to stay with you, and if you have no status then you are fucked.

>Why do you think women fawn over Ryan Gosling
Because he's handsome, famous, and rich

>ends up hurting me pretty often
Can women even feel pain?

Someone was retarded enough to write that pile of word vomit. Do they think they figured out life or something? The most likely thing is they have no experience in life.

>and ends up hurting me pretty often.
Of course, why am I not surprised? Its always the fucking same.

Attached: 16387501-1015-4F6B-AA84-E8898B111452.jpg (124x70, 8K)

>He didnt have the same experiences as I did so he is the unexperienced one.
Its almost like normies cant relate to robots.

normalfag spotted, fuck off

Yes.
Women have this thing called lost puppy syndrome.
Their maternal instincts makes them want to take care of pitiful shit.
The thing is that the neediness of a lonely person is often too much of a deal breaker

The most likely thing is that they've done a hero, because of normalfags like you.

Welcome to the real redpill OP
Organisms that get fucked up starts only have things get worse as time goes on.
Born as a weak fish? You get quickly eaten by a big fish. Born as a big fish? Your reward is to eat many weak fishes.

In the human world it only takes one small fuckup to ruin your life. Usually this fuckup is the fault of your parents and if you're male there is very little hope someone will have the patience to help you.
The only thing you can do as a loner to up your chances is to looksmax, there is a point when you're simply too good looking for women to ignore even if you have 0 social status.

Attached: 1470321485413.png (1280x544, 803K)

>Someone was retarded enough to write that pile of word vomit. Do they think they figured out life or something? The most likely thing is they have no experience in life.
Feel free to try and refute anything from it.

Look, guys, I called someone a normie. I'm so special.
This guy never really gave anything in his life a chance. Just like you guys he started to label everyone more socially apt than him a normie. At the end of the day, we either agree that we can make decisions and socials skills are like anything else learned in which case most people are able to have friends and lead normal life (i would agree that some need help with that but they are soo few in numbers I doubt people on here are those cases) or we agree to a full-on determinism in which case you would need to include those normies in your thinking. They are also victims of their environment and they bully people like these because that's the only way they can act. I am more in favor of the second way of thinking (it's more fact-based and has no need for metaphysics like the first one) but at least I extend it to everyone. To those more fortunate and those less fortunate.

How do you refute something that's not even wrong? All I could do to argue with that would be to throw a bunch of anecdotal evidence. How people help other people even if they don't like each other that much. How I met a bunch of people that don't see me as just a benefit to them but accept me on my worse days. How I don't see other people that are less fortunate than me as just lazy and understand that they may have been influenced by their environment. How I always reach out to people that are less social in class or at work and try to be friends with them.

And the funny thing is my statement will have just as much value as his. You can't refute it. That does not make it right.

>you grow up
>life is better now
As someone who was abused and has been very lonely, you're chatting balls lad. It never gets better

>Look, guys, I called someone a normie. I'm so special.
Didn't read rest of it.
No one here believes to be special (what is feels?), people were just asking you to leave, Mr. Emotional IQ 200. But you refuse to do so, because GODDAMIT, why should you respect the wishes of others?

>How do you refute something that's not even wrong?
Then what's the problem?

Why would I respect a wish like that? If I think of myself as a good guy and I see a site filled with people that link images about how the only good idea in life is to kill yourself i would say the better thing to do is to argue with them that there is much more to do in life and that there is value in it. I don't really care if they REEEE at me, call me a normie or anything like that.

Don't you understand what's the problem with making a statement that's not even wrong?

He probably thinks he's correcting your thinking and helping you and that the value of that outweighs the negative of pissing almost everyone who has replied to him off.
Or maybe he's just an egotist who wants to be right, idk, there are a myriad of reasons why he'd make that post I guess.

Here you go
"Not even wrong. ... The phrase "not even wrong" describes an argument or explanation that purports to be scientific but is based on invalid reasoning or speculative premises that can neither be proven correct nor falsified. Hence, it refers to statements that cannot be discussed in a rigorous, scientific sense."

>tfw never abused or neglected
>fw still became weird
FUCK IT

It's you who has the problem with it, because you're too stupid to prove it wrong, but still LE BELIEVE that it's wrong because you've been brainwashed into it.

>This guy never really gave anything in his life a chance. Just like you guys he started to label everyone more socially apt than him a normie
This post reeks of normie. I doubt reading this that you've had to put in a mountain of effort only to be shot down every time. You'd never understand the frustration of being unable to get anything that other people have by virtue of being born (it's literally that easy, normal people dont have to work for basic social skills). Maybe after 30 years of crushing lonlieness a man just wants to come home and rant on his keyboard about how its just not working. But if you cant even relate to that, and suspect it was just his shitty attitude all along, then you might just be a normie.

I think you're thinking of the wrong gender

His post reeks of a shitty attitude. It just gives a bunch of shitty excuses and makes everyone else a literal evil robot while he is the only one that had bad things happen to him. If you don't see it then there is not much I can do to convince you.

Of course not, men aren't -actually- supposed to show their emotions if they are negative.
You only get to show negative emotions if you're already in something serious, long-term, and committed.
But even then, it's a big fucking gamble to do so. Relationships end from things like this, I've seen many marriages end in divorce because something led to the man falling into depression, and the wife feels it's unfair to carry the burden.
"For better or worse" are really just words now, vows mean nothing.

#notyourpersonaltherapist, etc

Especially in western cultures, where capitalism has seeped into relationships, in the form of min/maxing.
She'll see you're being a sad sack of shit about something, and will think
>He can't deal with his problems directly
>He can't deal with his problems emotionally
>Emotionally immature; a real man could endure hardship
>If he's sad, it must mean I am not enough for him to be happy
>etc

She will look to other relationships, and on the surface see happiness, and then constantly feel like she is missing out on the life/relationship she is entitled to.
This will then start to build into discontent, and any single flaw which he shows will become a point of contention
For instance, classic: not asking for directions immediately.
In a good state it gets regarded as being persistent, having a sense of adventure, that sort of thing.
In a bad state, it now changes to being regarded as stubborn, prideful, egotistical.

The only time as a man you can legitimately show negative emotions or tears in front of your S.O. is:
>When a family member dies, such as mother, father, sibling, child
>When a close friend dies or suffers an accident
>When they are crying

If you do it at any other time, you are setting yourself up for the chopping block.

This user gets it.
Just because we are humans does not mean we are free of having to do nature's little competitions and dances for courtship.

/socs/ rating is trash, because men rate men lol. Really whenever I psted there I cared what wiomen had to say at most, but eventually I realised that trying to get others to rate you fucks you up mentally and destroys the idgaf attitude. I gor rated a 5/6 then seven by some guy who had no chin rated me 5.5 because I told him to chew more bubble gum lmao

>For instance, classic: not asking for directions immediately.
>In a good state it gets regarded as being persistent, having a sense of adventure, that sort of thing.
>In a bad state, it now changes to being regarded as stubborn, prideful, egotistical.
It's great how women can interpret the same behavior in 2 polar opposite ways isn't it.

>The only thing you can do as a loner to up your chances is to looksmax
A solutely not. I must call out this misinformation before anyone takes it seriously.

While looks can help, they are bottom of the barrel when it comes to attracting women.
Here are some or the things more important than looks:
>confidence
>alpha personality
>status
>vibe you put off
>being fun
>resources (money mostly in the modern world)
>etc.

Also, men almost always look like shit, I guess looking alpha could help, but not too much.
Focusing on looks is choosing failiure essentially.

I've looked very good at one point of my life (now I care way less and I've let myself go).

My good looks at the time did get me some attention, but when the women talked to me, they were put off by my beta personality (at the time).

Basically, looks can serve as bait, because you stand out.
Then again, a lot of things can serve as bait (an excuse for the girls to approach you).
Hell, you could use a dog, or a weird hat.

Conclusion:
Looks give too little to focus your attention on them.
If you make looks the focus of your "getting girls strategy", you will inevitably fail, unless you just happen to have other shit handled.

and wealthy. and famous.

Quite a bit.

Don't paint him in your head like an asshole.
He's not abusive or anything remotely like that. He never even raised his voice. He never cheated, beat me, said anything mean, or anything like that.
He's a good person. Profoundly so.

Why do you think anyone's interested in your insane rationalizations?

How exactly does he hurt you?

Ok thats good, I just hate it when I here that bullshit. Im glad that you both make each other feel loved and less lonely, I wish more of us could feel that.

>I wish more of us could feel that.
I mean, we can.

What are your excuses exactly?

Don't worry, I ahve them too, but recently I realised I'm bullshitting myself just sonI can avoid taking action (which will be painful).

Im a social recluse to the point where I dont even know how to interact and be friends with people anymore. Because of this I dont have a developed personality so I am just stuck here with nothing. I have no motivation to dismiss it as bullshitting myself.

I'm not willing to go in detail. He's in great amounts of pain and he's isolating himself, probably to save me from witnessing what he is going through. I love him very much, but knowing he is being alone and hurting is quite painful for me anyway. It's a very hard balance to find.
He never actively hurt me in any way, it's just an unfortunate situation. We'll figure it out.

Nah I get that. I don't want to paint him like some sort of abusive horrible person, which he's not.
I hope you find someone who loves you and makes you feel accepted.

>What are your excuses exactly?
I don't have anyone who loves me? What the fuck else would it be?

You aren't just going to wake up confident after having life punch you in the gut every day for 25 years.

A good looking loner will have better chances than an ugly loner