What the fuck am I

you ask who am I talking to?

There are people that are listening. They respond to the things I say on these boards. I play a game of battlefield, yell out in my room about geoffrey and someone posts "DAMN YOU GEOFFREY" on these boards. I jerk off under my blanket and people on these boards post about masturbating to abstract lines.

Things like this have happened a loottttttt. I have no microphone hooked up to my computer. I have no webcam. Someone is listening to me and they are doing it en-mass.

Even my mother knows that people are listening to me. She was telling me about getting the phone from the neighbors and when I was in my room she did the "shhh" gesture and lead me into the other room. No one else was home. She then whispered a few things about what to tell them ect. She did this a few times.

I saw my dad looking around the corners for cameras.

People are listening, I don't know who though. I mean, I KNOW who. I just don't know how many. The fact you guys can say "NO ONE IS LISTENING" means you're fucking listening you fucking retards.

Attached: theyarelistening.jpg (760x423, 98K)

if you have to ask "Why not go to the authorities? Why not call the police or 911?"

Because they are the authorities. They control the phone systems, they control the internet. You guys control all of that.

Same reason I will never let you cunts take me alive. There is no way in hell I would get a fair trail. If I go to trail for anything it's because you just want to see how I'll handle another social experiment, this time in prison. There are years of experiments you could do to me in there and I just won't be any part of it. I will fight you cunts to the fucking death.

You ask "Well, who are they then." it's the NSA, it's the ARMY, it's the NAVY, it's the AIRFORCE, it's the FBI, it's the CIA, it's the DOD, it's all of them. They all have a little tiny piece in the pie. They all have something to gain from these illegal human experiments. Some of them are even private enterprise. They have to use funds from private companies to help hide them from the tax payers and the books.

It's about AI research and development. It's about PR and propaganda. It's about conspiracy and cover-ups. It's... about running things as smoothly as they can be run. To what scale? I don't know exactly. I don't have the truth and my world is very controlled and limited.

They need to tell me though. There is no way I can possibly guess what it is... I just don't have enough information. I just don't. They need to end this, the damage they are doing to me cannot be undone. If they keep waiting, if they are just going to keep on torturing me with no regard to my well being or mental health then they just need to fucking kill me already.

They need to stop this. It's done. I'm done. It's time to tel me. The longer you fuckers take, the more pointless it will become. At this point you are just hurting me to hurt me. There is no cause, there is no science, there is no reason to be doing what they are doing to me other than a personal grudge.

End it.

Attached: 46494371.jpg (800x599, 59K)

Ayyy same, what have you seen user? Have you had any physical manifestation occurrences?

You need help, user. Please, just get checked out. Better safe than sorry.

You are a retarded human with a computer.

There was a time where I told my mother "Every time you guys try to plant a message or fuck with me I'm going to take a shit in the middle of your room."

A day later, there was a piece of shit in the middle of her room. Just a "Yeah, we are fucking with you."

Which... I have known for 2 years now assholes. You only had me going for those first couple weeks but since then I have known it's all been fuckery. I have known exactly how you have done all of it. I have seen it all and it's fucking annoying.

So why keep doing it? Why?

I will kill you cunts when I get out. People ARE going to die now. I'm sure of it. So you might as well just fucking kill me. You keep doing this to me and your own people are going to start thinking for themselves. Eventually, they will get to the same point I am. "Why the fuck are we doing this now? What are we even fucking doing?"

OP this is not safe.

We are listening.
We do not want you to say these things.

no fucking shit. Nothing is safe. Where I am at isn't safe.

The fucking president asked me "What do we have to do to make you feel safe." and I said "Tell me the truth." and then nothing happened.

Telling me the truth will make me feel safe. Knowing what the fuck is going on will make me feel safe. Having a companion will make me feel safe. HAVING SOMETHING TO FUCKING DO will make me safe.

Giving me my fucking medications will make me feel safe.

No, instead you fuckers just lock me away and do fucking nothing at all. Because they aren't trying to keep me safe, they are trying to kill me. They are just rtying to kill me. They are trying to make me feel so fucking miersable that I'll fucking kill myself. Then they can be "Welp, we tried! We gave me his family and everything he just didn't want to do anything!"

They are killing me and you dumb fuckers are letting them. Thanks assholes.

>told my mother "Every time you guys try to plant a message or fuck with me I'm going to take a shit in the middle of your room."

lmao

then give me what I want. What's so hard about that?

"We don't want you to say these things. We want you to shut up."
OK, then give me what I'm asking for. Give me my medications. If you don't want to give me both, then give me the one in a much more convenient, safer form and do it in exactly the way I want you to. In the amount I want you to.

YOU KNOW WHAT no, you give me fucking both of them now. Before I would have taken one and I would have taken them in a locked safe with a time release. However... since you guys decided to be massive fucking cunts, I will only take them the way I want them. You give them both to me and you fucking give them ALL TO ME AT ONCE. You give them to me with my name on them, a prescription number, a pharmacy number, and you give them to me with unlimited refills with no date or time or anything limited. And you refill them a thousand at a time. If you don't, I'll fucking kill the fucking doctors and I'll fucking kill them all. No compromises on this. If you tamper with my meds or alter them in any way Ill fucking kill them. Oxycodone 20mg instant release NO TAMPER PROOF MECHANISMS and Adderall 20mg instant release NO EXTENDED RELEASE NO TAMPER PROOF SHIT JUST THE REGULAR ASS 20MG ADDERALL. And you give them to me a thousand at a time. Big ass bottles. If I overdose and die then I overdose and fucking die. You cunts are just going to have to trust me on this and if you don't I'll fucking kill all of you.

"No, we will not do that."
Then you don't want me to be fucking quiet now do you?

"We want you to be quiet."
Then give me what I want.

"no."
don't think you dumb fuckers quite understand how this works. You ask for something, you give something in return. Give me my fucking medications and you give me a fucking friend to talk to. and snug. In a place that's nicer than this.

"no."
Welp, then I hate you and I will fight you dumb fuckers till the bitter fucking end and then some.

for the girls

DO NOT MAKE ANY DEALS WITH THEM. If they are saying "If you fuck this guy then we will give your boss what he wants." don't fucking do it.

Just don't, They are not going to pay up. They are just going to lie to you. They ALWAYS lie, they always try to trick everyone. They will think of some shitty loop hole and laugh at you for it.

Don't try to make deals for my benefit or safety, they never pan out. They tried that shit in the past with my dad, and my dad fucking lied to them. They gave me fake meds, they kept spying on me ,and they kept drugging me with other shit. They are fucking liars and can't be trusted at-fucking-all.

They know when this is done and I get out of here they are fucking dead.

you're like Stan but eminem wrote you back before something bad happened and you didn't listen anyway.
youtube.com/watch?v=gOMhN-hfMtY

Attached: tears.jpg (550x535, 55K)

I asked you guys to give me a complete breakdown of everyone, their relationships, their past, their lives, bios, history, sexual history, relationships, their public post histories (specifically chan and twitter and tumblr and facebook) who they were referring to ect.

What you did instead was give them a fucking survey? Are you fucking kidding me? Is that what I fucking asked for? Fucking WAS IT? You were suppose to interview them, get the truth, interview the people they talked about, get some fucking facts and background check ALL of that shit. Not just fucking "answer these questions, be hoenst but lol we won't know." you lazy piece of fucking shits.

I am not paying these cunts fucking anything. I'm firing them and getting people that will actually do the fucking jobs I fucking give them. Are you dumb mother fuckers serious right now.

Seriously, would any of the "upper" guys just be ok with taking the word of the people around them? Or would they want more done? Would they just be all "Ah ok detective I trust you that you did your job." no, they would want to see that shit for themselves. They wouldn't just take the god damn word of a bunch of people they don't fucking know what the fuck is wrong with you lazy fucking cunts.

I'm not just SOME GUY. Put some more fucking effort into it holy shit.

What have you seen user? I've seen some shit too and I have an inkling of what I am but a straightforward answer is not possible. It would ruin the suspense.

you guys remember when all those videos and shit were all mystical and fun and mind blowing? That everything revolved around me and renee and it was fucking crazy?

Every music video was about the sun and the starboy and shit? Like, even songs from the past somehow told the story of my life? The blackstar music video was all "holy shit how is that real? Why is a david bowie song about me?" and then you had cat people bneing about all the cat people and shit?

ALL of the music videos were like that. They all shared the white out eyes, the shake dancing, and the jesus imagery. Mr brightside bowing to the empty stand. All the paintings people were making. Movies were telling the story of my life, using people from my life, using my name as character. All of it. Cake going the distance about the guy that never quit, that i was over a long time ago but he was still out there racing and pacing and hugging the turns.

All the posts on my facebook and twitter. Things I would see in real life. THEY HAVE GIVEN ENOUGH. My friends having twins and look alikes.

Man what the fuck happaned to all of that? What happened to all the magic? What about the day of execution?

Two fucking years and nothing. did they forget? Did they cancel it? Was it ever a thing? Were they just fucking with me? What the fuck is the point? Why tell me "THIS IS IT! THIS IS THE END! THIS IS TOTALLY THE END GUYS!" and then never end it?

Remember people posting pictures of me as a girl? Tsuaii doing fanart and I was getting all exctied to be a pretty lady.p ALl of the dreams you gave me with the parades, people celebrating and shit. That it was over and I was a hero. That I was finally free and everyone was happy about it.

The concerts with people dressed up as me or the girls. Cat ears, the superbowl. Remember the superbowl? Lady gaga, cat girls, the blackstar. Katy Perry Firework.

Why? Why all of that just to fuck with me? Because that shit really hjappened. It all really happened.

Roast me

Blox

Attached: IMG_20181203_133714502.jpg (1944x2592, 1.34M)

the things that were clearly about me, about the blue eyed blonde girl, little blue white. little smart girl, little girl blue styuding all by herself watching the world from her desk was about to be given a second chance. A second life.

and then nothing happened. Just that same message repeated time and time again. but then nothing happens. Just meant to suffer. It was all just torture. Just meant to fuck with me, to give me false hope so that when the truth came (that no one gives a fuck about me) it would hurt that much more.

youtube.com/watch?v=ng8cDzyktEY

Made me cry two years ago. Was like "omg, what is going on. How is this possible?" and the messages of hope in all of the songs would... give me hope. That things were going to get better. That I was going to be happy. That my life would turn into a fantasy.

But then nothing happened. they kept torturing me.

I still don't know what it is. I still don't know WHY those things are being said or how they are. They are definitely real, it's not just in my head. I don't know why they keep trying to make me think they are just in my head. I'm not stupid, I can see that something is going on I just odn't know what. They are just fuckign with me, they are torturing me. They wanted me to just blow my brains out or something.

Why? Why do this to someone. Why fuck with them so much? What the fuck is wrong with you people.

>WHAT THE FUCK AM I YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES AND WHY WONT YOU FUCKING TELL ME.
You're a fag, op

another song that would do it for me, that you guys gave to me january 19th 2016. You wrote it on my fucking presciprtions that were all placebos and fake. To give me inspiration and false hope.

youtube.com/watch?v=Wgbv3d-k7sA

Why? "You'll laugh at this one day." and seeing how someone could love me and that my kaleidoscope eyes would be loved and THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU DO TO SOMEONE YOU FUCKING LOVE.

You are just fucking with me. You are torturing me. It's just fucking torture. Fucking why?

for people who didn't read the whole thing OP is apparently posting from a mental hospital or some institution so nothing crazy is going to happen.

Attached: thumbUpCar.jpg (598x465, 62K)

You look pretty well done already.

you wish? You fucking retard, why would you wish that upon yourself?

But really, no homo, what do you judge my appearance overall excluding the racial part

Unsure, pretty standard. I'm afraid I'm not the best judge. Try moisturizer? And shave your upper lip if you're not gonna grow it thicker

Normally, through out my entire life people out in public have called me ugly in school as well

What did you do this time?
orignly

Acne played a hideous part in my appearance. My face is marred from previous giant blisters that popped and then left permanent scarring