Ideal bf thread

Femanons, Post your Minimum and optimal requirements for a guy to become your bf

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Minimum:
>doesnt believe that the ends justify the means
>very calm and collected
>almost never gets angry
>abstract thinker
>grounded personality
>humble
>good relationship with his mother
>wants at least 3 children

Optimal:
>pacifist
>religious, christian preferably
>brown eyes
>never gets loud
>has a good relationship with both of his parents and siblings
>social
>reads a lot
>wants 5 children
>will do fun activities with me like going to art galleries and museums
>goes to church regularly
>has something he believes in to the point that hed die for his ideals
>puts his own moral code above anything else

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minimum
>chubby
>hypersexual
>loves cuddles and affection
>open minded and experimental
>has lots of individual hobbies and interests
>not scared to communicate
>genuinely likes and appreciates me
>positive mutual enabling to become better people together
>enjoys just having conversation, and could listen and talk for hours on end about the dumbest things
>wants to go on lots of dates, but likes indoors more

optimal
>kinky
>is a switch
>sadomasochist
>kinda fucked up but hides it well
>spergs out over things he likes
>good at vidya to help with how much I suck
>likes anime
>reads
>not a lot of friends (if any)
>likes to tease and bully me in an affectionate way, but also lets me tease him back
>has lots of strange quirks
>goes along with my dumb impromptu skits

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>your optimal isn't your ideal

Settling means your relationship will fail for sure.

How much is alot?
Like 2 books a week?
Sounds a bit like me cept eyes arent brown

You just described me exactly. What is chubby to you?

anything bigger than average but not morbidly obese, overweight is fine as long as they don't heave with every step and have to wash themselves with a stick

I just want them to be squishy when we cuddle

Does 6'2" and 216lbs sound good to you? What size dick would you prefer?

it's more about what they do with it than the size itself. I like experienced guys

>>has lots of strange quirks

Do these qualify for that?

>have minor speech impedment where I might mix up two similar sounding words despite knowing which one to use, it only comes up 1-2 times a week but if Im drunk its every other sentence
>dont step or stand on lines aligned with walls/structures
>obsessed with hands being clean, if Im cooking chicken I can clean my hands up to ten times

>7 feet tall
>12 inch cock
>alpha male chad
>buff
>will rape me and hit me
>down to pee on me

>I like experienced guys
Well, it was nice to have a brief glimmer of false hope.

speech impediments are very cute, and I also wash my hands an autistic amount, especially with chicken or anything greasy. I'd definitely say they qualify

No offense but your ideal sounds cucked. How will he fight off predators if he opposes all violence?

I have a fantasy where two guys try to have me, one is a high status male, one a low status male and I pick the low stat over the high stat. Its like, I will actually love the low stat guy but rejecting a >better< guy is a thrill.

I'm all of that except chubby. Am i kill?

this. i was this "calm and collected" kind guy. over the time (even if you think you wont) you will start perceiving my kindness as weakness and you will try to use it. this is really bad for relationships.

hi heather origineli

Hey, you described me perfectly apart from the eyes as mine are blue. I'm just curious, would you mind writing a bit about yourself? Of course if you want to.

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Pls be in
NEW ZEALAND
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LA N

>not even remotely aggressive, including raising voice
>compassionate
>relatable humor
>willingness of give and take
>preferably hapa
>monogamist
>against pedophilia
>wants a lot of children
>will work, preferably

Take away chubby, lots of hobbies, reads and you have me. I'm not interested in anime but I don't dislike it. I'm just a 6'2 sex machine when I actually have a woman

>also a virgin. I absolutely do not like the idea of being with a guy if he wasn't, it kinda freaks me out

>tfw this is my boyfriend

Being kind doesn't mean being weak.
My boyfriend is the kindest person I've ever met. Literally a heart of gold.
Yet he can stand for himself, he can say no, he can keep me safe.

oh thats wonderful! Where did u find him?

>speech impediments are very cute

That is nice to hear, I was totally making a fool of myself yesterday and my friends teased me a lot. The girls there seemed very bored so I just rolled with it to give some more entertainment, maybe they didn't smile because they thought it was funny?

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We met off Jow Forums. I got into a server with other anons, became friends with him, felt like he was the guy I was going to marry after 2 weeks. Truly a 10/10 guy, in every way. Exactly what I've always wanted.

>not white
>tall
>not into technology
>doesnt care about pop culture
>isnt remotely interested in the internet
>into philosophy
>not racist
>doesnt use imageboards
>has his own apartment
>working on degree or graduated with something useful not a meme degree

That's my ideal guy, preferably asian or black

Not that user but wholesome and cute.

Thats sweet! Im happy for you, wishing you only the best!

Thanks

Min:
>Body like pic related
>5/10 face
>Not balding
>At least 5'6
>Loyal
>Affectionate
>Likes cuddles
>Kinky
>Comfy (likes to be home with me and spend time watching movies with me etc)
>Average dick
>Loves me

Ideal:
All the above but Jow Forums, 5'9 and 6-8/10 face. Pref light hair and blue eyes

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Fembots are terrible selfish people and you should seriously lower your expectations if your a girl who posts here

*you're, not your
At least insult us properly.

the fact that you're everything else is pretty impressive, as long as you're not skellie I'm sure it's fine, I just like softness when cuddling

nay, britbong

it's nice when youre comfortable enough to just make a fool of yourself, I like people who are true to themselves, it's more fun that way. Speech impediments are definitely a more niche like, most normans probably won't be into it. It's very endearing though, I like them a whole lot

the presumption in these rewuirements is that hes already tall and has good bone structure, then

Alright, I'll take you if you're a KHV, never camwhored, and are willing to get married before having sex.

I too am a Bong. East Devon pls

yay someone who's ideal I actually fit. what kind of movies do you like?

>everything I want right now, but I will change my mind in the next trend

Fembots ironically seem more sane then normie gals.

As daft as this sounds, I know that many fembots would like me. However how do you meet fembots? How many times have I walked past them and never knew. Where the fuck do I find them.

Online seems the logical awnser.

Honestly all kinds of movies, but first that I really like that comes to my mind are V for Vendetta, The Intouchables. There are a lot of interesting movies I have yet to watch because currently I'm depressed to the point I hardly have energy to live let alone watch stuff. I also spend a lot of time just playing mmos. Which reminds me that I like when a guy plays games and if he lets me watch. It's fun for me.

Recently got more into watching series though. Favorites being Breaking Bad, House. Currently watching New Sherlock and I like it a lot, reminds me of House. Planning to watch Westworld after I'm done with it.

Your, as in possession, your expectations.
You're, you are expectations doesn't make any sense.
It was the proper use of the word.
Femoids don't know how to grammar.

> if your a girl who posts here
Here, you' need "you're" for "you are", not possession.

minimum
>likes music
>will cuddle frequently
>taller than 5ft3
>good sense of humour
>loyal and wont cheat
>good manners
>likes animals

ideal
>brown/black hair
>doesnt smoke
>smaller than 5ft11
>likes the same music as me
>intelligent
>interested in science
>pale
>watches anime

You dont want him to be on image boards yet you are in one

Hi. It me! Is smoking that bad tho? I'll stop if you're adamant. Are you good with outdoors-y stuff? Like walking around town, bars, etc?

no smoking is just an ideal, id be okay with it i just am not a fan of heavy smoking. and yes i enjoy both staying in and doing outdoor things! where are you from tho user?

Ahhh that's a relief. Was a fat kid, so chubby leaves a bad taste in my mouth. What books you like to read? For me it's all about 18th and 19th century. Specialy the french stuff. The past just feels so unique.

Ooooh i actualy fit everything? Well god damn. Do you go to the gym?

Have you tried binging Always sunny? That shit is anti sadness. Also buy a lot of fruits and whenever you binge something bring a big fruitbowl. Eating healthy is easy af when you don't realize it.

thats me down to a T, what kind of music you like?

I do because I like to be toned myself too, I'm still new to it though. Realistically I ask nothing from my partner that I don't do myself in return. So I basically also described what I'm like in the post except I'm not so tall.

No, but that's definitely one of the series I'm planning to watch, I forgot about it but now that you mentioned that's the one I'll watch after done with Sherlock or when I feel like watching something else.

>So I basically also described what I'm like in the post except I'm not so tall.
And I obviously don't have dick either.

I mainly just read novels. Lots of /lit/ tier books and Japanese literature like Mishima and Souseki. I haven't read any 18th or 19th century texts, but when it comes to French I have some of Sartres works on my to-read list.

Kek
Posts like these make me laugh

Ohhh gimmie the japanese starter pack. Read shogun and taiko and i adore them. Feels so fresh from the western lifestyle. And for french literature, don't be afraud to start with the basics, like Dumas and Maupassant. They're the basics cause they're good and fun to read. Balzac too, if you like descriptions.

>this. i was this "calm and collected" kind guy. over the time (even if you think you wont) you will start perceiving my kindness as weakness and you will try to use it. this is really bad for relationships.
Can confirm this. Sadly, you can't act like that if you don't want to "lose" in the relationship. And even if you don't view a relationship like a competition (which in my mind no sane person would do), she does.

pic related, what you gotta to offer beside a hole?

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ALERT: what foids say they want and what they ACTUALLY want are two things.

dont get confused by the VIRTUE SIGNALING

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Ayyy that's cool. The fact that you work in order to be able to be demading of others. Definitely respectable. And i'm behind both of those posts btw. Where are you from?

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What kinda music do you like femanon
original

EU. Pls become my adorable Jow Forums bf user. It'd make me happy and I'd worship you.

you sound like a real faggot user

>thats me down to a T
Damn user, that's crazy that you like the same music as her without her posting any music tastes

>Realistically I ask nothing from my partner that I don't do myself in return.
Nice, what kind of steroids are you on? What do you use as PCT? Which amphetamines are you cutting on?

A smile was put on my face. I'm from Belgium. Please be my cute gf with whom i can cuddle. The nights are cold...

>5'5 or shorter
( I'm 5'11 grill)
>Asian or white
>Atleast 8 inches
> Job
> Own apartment
> Virgin only
> Goes to college or has degree
>Likes tall girls
> Dom
> Likes bdsm

Same dude to whom you responded btw

>5'11
dang dude
you a big bitch

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I fit all those but am the same height as you

I do none of that shit and I don't ask you to do it either

Damn it, I wish I was from there so I could help you with that. It's awfully cold and dark here too. I need you in my life.

>I do none of that shit and I don't ask you to do it either
Then you're not getting the kind of body you want.

Awwwwwww god damn it. Where are you from?

Do you look young ? How old

do you have discord? I'd like to talk books more user

Norway.

>tfw you are not here with me under comfy and warm sheets watching Always Sunny

I'm 24 and I'd say I look my age, are you into /ss/ or something?

Yep yep. GoldExperience#1306

Meant for you Apparently this wasn't original enough

Discord? Any social media? Come oooooooon the feels are getting to me, i want them cuddles.

I am this but not kinky and not hyper sexual and not a sadomasochist.

>5'5 or shorter
>Likes tall girls
>Dom
What

>EU
Damn. We might've actually been a really good fit if I wasn't from Freedomland. I do really like House though, and also really liked GoT, Hell on Wheels, Parks and Rec, and Dexter. I don't really play mmos anymore because they take a lot of time, but I used to play RuneScape a lot.

Then you're a boring loser.

Thank god I weeded you out before I had to put up with you.

1) Be better at making friends than making enemies.
2) Have a strong and calm demeanor.
3) Don't live around niggers

wasn't me but I can't say I don't agree, sex is fun

If you're not into any of that then you're the one being weeded out from every relationship in modern times, so good luck I guess.

Yooooo-hoooooo?

If that's every modern relationship then I will happily die alone.

No you won't, you'll be miserable af.

Imagine being this much of an incel that you don't know and do the basic sex performances of your time. It's not just blowjobs and butt stuff anymore grandpa.

Holy fucking numbers

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you know your bad at sex when you have to hit someone to feel something