Wiping

Not op, but no. I have a lot of hair on my ass and I don't feel like taking a blade anywhere I can't see

I could get hair but then my asshole would burn. This is fucked

Why? Does sweat cause the cheeks to stick together when there's no hair?

itchy scratchy bumbum

If you're really that concerned about shit getting stuck on your ass hair, just shave it off, it really isn't a big deal, won't hurt or anything unless you're a total retard about it. But the way I understand it, the shit that you 'find' after a few hours is like the tiny bit of shit that accumulates when you fart a lot, i.e. it doesn't smell

I'm gonna change ur fucking life op.
>Finish shit, wipe as usual
>I hope you have liquid soap like a fucking human being not some animal that uses a bar because you're gonna turn the tap on, wet your wiping hand then splooge a big ol' dollop of soap onto it
>Reach behind yourself and slather that shit into your ass
>Rinse your hand off, scoop some more soap out of your ass, rinse, repeat
>Then wash your fucking hands you fat fuck

Dab dry with towel and don't rub it you'll just aggravate the skin. Hey presto, clean ass.

Unrelated to OP but i also have a shitting related problem.

My shits itself are fine, right size, color occasional diarrhea but who doesnt have that, right? The problem i got is with wiping. I have to wipe like 50 fucking times before my ass is fully clean, it gets to the point my asshole area gets sore and it even starts to bleed (not from the anus directly but because im constanlty wiping it with toilet paper)

I drank a lot of coffee back in the day wich i thought was the cause but i cut back on that shit heavily and nothing.
I'm not fat nor anything
Anyone got an idea?

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Can't exactly do that in a public washroom padre

Try eating some fucking vegetables.

>the shit that you 'find' after a few hours is like the tiny bit of shit that accumulates when you fart a lot, i.e. it doesn't smell

How do you know it doesn't smell?

In that case I'd advise you carry flushable wet wipes in your bag. These are also a fine alternative to my original strategy if you're squeamish about fistfucking yourself.

Wet wipes are a dream. You can also use toilet paper you've wetted under the sink, though you'll have to shuffle back and forth. Eat things that don't make your shit thick

every day mate
i just got done from my diet and lost 20 kilos

If you're American, get nair. Be careful with it. Pour it into something your ass fits into and sit there for 5 minutes. It dissolves the keratin in your hair

>Eat things that don't make your shit thick

such as?

I've never been told that I smell of shit and I doubt that the smell this tiny amount of shit emits could get through my clothes

I do this sometimes and it keeps my bootyhole nice and clean. That and soap and a loofah. Honestly this is not difficult OP.

Go to the liquor store and buy a bottle of champagne. Pop the cork. Then stick the cork firmly up your ass. Problem solved.

I know it isn't but I'm a fucking retard so I need to learn this basic stuff. When I was a teenager I didn't even wash my ass in the shower and the shit kept accumulating to the point that I'd have to get some scissors and mirror and spend an hour cutting a bean sized piece of solid shit free from my other ass hairs.

I wish I was making this up

I always try to shit before I shower and I wet my tp with a dab of water to make a wipe more effective. I also gotta shave my ass every now and again. Smooth butthole poops feel good man.

just spit on it instead of using the sink, spit is probably more sanitary than shit

i poo in the morning or sometimes in the evening when i get home. i recommend quickly getting into a hot shower, bending over and spreading your buttocks, angling your posterior region in such a way so as to catch the jet of hot water on your anus and gooch

>20 guys sharing their advice about shitting with hairy asses

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I have an extraordinarily hairy ass and I can tell you firsthand that a shaved asshole is bliss. Just get a decent blade and shave that shit while squatting in the shower.

Also wipe from back to front first and then wipe front to back.

Godbless you, and this original post

My advice is to eat more fiber so that your feces have more volume and are less watery. Shaving or trimming is also a good idea along with with using wet wipes.
If things don't improve, the last option is to slightly dehydrate yourself to shit hard-dry poop, which usually requires minimal wiping.
Godspeed, user. I had a similar problem, but with smelly feet. Shit was probably in my head, but it was so terrible to the point that I had to buy new cheap shoes every 3 days.

I had the same fear, user.

> Use clinical strength deodorant
> wash ass really fucking well in the AM
> Subscribe to Dollar shave club, get packs of one wipe Charlie's every month
> Carry them everywhere, wipe ass thoroughly with peppermint buttwipes after shitting

You'll smell better than any normie guaranteed

>I'm a 23 y/o guy and I'm deathly afraid that I always smell like literal shit.
Are you by any chance a sandnigger aka turk, arab etc? If yes, I'm sorry but that is your natural smell.
Just trim your fucking ass hair and get some wet wipes.

wtf wiping back to front? should be front to back first unless you want opee to rub the poopoo all over his nads

I fixed this problem by raising my leg up on the counter and wiping deep in there.

Wax your arse

Alright user, you have a few options

>Eat more fiber (Makes shits solid and don't get stuck)
>Shave your ass
>Apply powder (Three options cornstarch / gold bond men's powder / chassis. Option 1) Cheap but works 2) Alright price works a bit better 3) Premium stuff and works the best)
>Get a bidet (Three options Use a watering can and some soap to clean up after each shit (Cheapest option) , Buy a handheld bidet to attach to pipes by the toilet. Buy a toilet seat bidet
>Carry baby wipes

Using a few of these options will work best

I fixed my problem by shaving my ass, applying powder (To reduce swampass/sweat in general) and also using a bidet. If all else fails, you can just neck yourself.

Based fellow toilet roll spitter.

Take a shower and wash out your ass, you fucking idiot.

I certainly didn't need this mental imagery.

Thanks for making my night OP I'm fucking dying

DO NOT shave..
>
>Why?
>itchy

DO NOT SHAVE. The hair growing will itch to high hell. Use wet wipes like the other user says. And I know this is going to sound crazy, but rip the hair out by hand. Lay on your side and a few hairs at a time pull them out starting at the top of your crack.

Its part of why it sweats so much, and is also partially responsible for feces showing up because it was trapped in it. It's also the reason for any smell, it has the same smell absorbtion of fabric.

Also after reading the thread, another user mentions squatting. This will help a bit too as it will put your anatomy into the correct position to pinch properly.

An easy way to do it is to raise the heels of your feet and lean forward and place your elbows on your knees, slightly in front. It's basically simulating squatting.

>hairy ass
it literally doesn't matter the entire rest of your body
yes. You smell like complete shit and you'll never get rimmed.

Babywipes. Then wash it with the shower head.

metamucil psyllium husk

>in your bag
What the fuck am I? A roastie? I don't carry a fucking bag you degenerate

>wet toilet paper and wipe with it
Clearly you've never tried this, or you just don't have a hairy ass. Don't do this. All it does is break off pieces on your ass, you might be able to get it to work a little but it's not worth it imo

You're either not going to believe me or not want to do it, but what I do is just grab the hairs around my asshole and yank them out a few times until there's no shit left