30+ Thread

30+ Thread

Turn 31 in a few months time and wow, I think I might end it this year.

Job's killing me, lack of a social life's killing me, videogames are boring the fuck out of me, still a giant virgin of course, still living with my parents, have less that 2k in the bank, sleep a lot on my days off, buy junk food that I barely eat with what little money I have and a bunch of other shit that's probably killing me as well.

And now Jow Forums seems oddly social competent (and young), like I've been through a lot of the boards and somehow everyone's figured out the secret of how to live. Everyone's been laid, has friends or has a decent job or at least has their youth.

What the fuck? Did I miss out a memo on a group suicide for wizards or something? Where did the older social retards go?

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>have a job
>lives with parents
Come on, user.

>waste more money for no reason
Come on, murican

I'm not Murrican. Living alone teaches you to cook and clean after yourself + it allows you to bring friends and women over without asking or bothering anyone + it literally gives you all the freedom you can ask for.

It's barely a grand a month. Half of it goes to household shit anyway.

Who /30andstillaneet/ here? Bonus for living with parents too.

Ummm.... it's IS possible you've missed out on the memo. I write and "publish" it, but it's only in finnish, although no doubt it has been translated to other languages... Basically, it's a "Universal Language Guide" consisting of "useful phares of present time".

If you tell me how to make it reach everyone I'll translate it to english and post it.

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30s were my roughest time of life. Tfw no gf will always lurk but there life after you realise you my never have one.

>31
>recently bought a small flat
>have a shitty car
>have an average office job with average salary pay
>haven't had sex in years
It could be worse but it could be a lot better, too.

>30s were my roughest time of life
I don't know about that, the intent to kill myself has become so sharp and visible. I've never had this much clarity. I mean, I used to worry about my parents finding me dead but now at 30, all I can say is fuck 'em, this is on them, the pressure is too much now.

>Basically, it's a "Universal Language Guide" consisting of "useful phrases of present time".
You've piqued my interest.

>few weeks away from 30
>spent my entire 20s alone
>to the point where I don't think I am even capable of loving anyone anymore
I am scared because I feel like I have no reason to live if I can't experience love. I stopped watching anime years ago, I barely play video games and I've already read more books than most people read in a lifetime.

How can I give my life meaning?

> he assumes people on here have friends and can attract women

You must be new here

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>How can I give my life meaning?
If you can't really enjoy anything, how can you?

No matter how lonely and anti-social you are, you can still ask someone to come over.

Right Ill just ask any random person to come over

Good one m8

It feels like humans were never meant to live past maybe 35.

>he assumes people on here have friends and can attract women
You mean this specific thread right? Cos the rest of Jow Forums has seemingly become normies over the last few months (and years if I'm honest).

Ya need to get a higher paying job, from money comes freedom, with freedom you can find happiness

If that means extra school or extra training, do it. If your already at rock bottom then you have nothing to lose by trying

It feels like people aren't really meant to exist on their own.

Blame GG and the 2016 Amerifat elections. The whole site is overrun with normalfags now. It all should have ended when Moot left.

>It all should have ended when Moot left.
It really should have.

>Blame GG and the 2016 Amerifat elections. The whole site is overrun with normalfags now.
I don't think it's that even, this feels different. Like the rapture has happened for losers.

what's up other failures
the big 3-4 back at it ahahaaa

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How'd you survive the last 3 years? Cos, oh my lord, I think the world is conspiring against me to make me as miserable as possible.

Once I started living alone literally the only people I ever talked to were bartenders, cashiers, and coworkers who were always different because I was working at a massive warehouse. The concept of making real friends or attracting a woman quickly seemed to become an unrealistic joke. Whenever I got home it was just silence, drinking, and occasional vidya that I can barely get into anymore. I basically just started hanging around my parents way more than being alone because I was literally starting to destroy myself. It's like you honestly might as well just live with your parents if you don't have a social circle at all.

33. don't know why I'm still alive.
I have no purpose in life.
Work is a means to an end to put a roof over my head and put food in my stomach, it's just a paycheck to continue to exist for no fucking reason.
Too blackpilled. No interest in having kids, no interest in relationships. I am alienated from society in general.

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>It's like you honestly might as well just live with your parents if you don't have a social circle at all.
That's true if you actually get along with them. Mine were intrusive, were noisy early in the morning (including weekends), if I wanted to watch a movie in the living room they'll constantly barge in, would go through my stuff when I'm out, would cook things I don't like, I would have to schedule masturbation to the rare occasions they're both out. Living alone for me is certainly better.

>I basically just started hanging around my parents way more than being alone because I was literally starting to destroy myself. It's like you honestly might as well just live with your parents if you don't have a social circle at all.
My parents are getting on my nerves though. I did do house-sitting for a couple of weeks though when they had to attend to some family troubles. It was so lonely.

I have to keep going. It's not like I'm doing much anyway, just working a shitty pt job and staying a virgin.
It'd literally kill mom if I were to ann hiro.

I've always been really lucky to have a good relationship with my parents, it's actually probably one of the best aspects of my life if not the actual best.
In the years before I moved out it was getting really hard to get along with them at the time, but then I moved out and after a while my attitudes changed about everything and I don't fight them on stupid pointless shit anymore. In the end they're literally all I have right now because my old friends and I live all over the country.

>Too blackpilled. No interest in having kids, no interest in relationships. I am alienated from society in general.


iktf

I honestly wish I was still a bluepilled. I don't even see women as human anymore. Just fuck holes. Marriage is a sham and society is a way to funnel money out of my pockets into the pockets of single mothers.

It's not a way to live though is it? You know, if God sends me to Hell for committing suicide, I'll make sure to punch Him in the face on the way down.

>pills, pills, pills

>Whenever I got home it was just silence

Yeah dude, it got so bad that I started talking to myself just to make noise, and sooner than you'd think I just started acting like a fucking animal and having gibberish conversations with multiple non-existent people. I also picked up the habit of making slapping sounds, and can slap faster than the Flash can jerk off. My neighbors must assume that I am furious masturbating like an enraged Neanderthal every day, but then they must also know that I act a like a paranoid schizo in my free time

>Live
My friend, I haven't "lived" or been considered "living" since I was a happy autistic little kid.
We're not supposed to "live" being this way, we're just supposed to exist and not bother anyone else.

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ever thought of doing drugs?

So I'm not completely crazy then. During that house sitting I paced up and down the stairs to fill my day with...something I don't know what. And I also started having conversations to fill the silence.

I'm thinking of going to Amsterdam with a "friend" (read: parasite who fell off the social ladder and clings to me when no on else talks to him but would ditch me in a heartbeat).

Pills are the new hip and trendy cope.

You could just, not give a shit about what others think and do stuff. Just because others have failed doesn't mean you have to too.

It'll happen to you too someday, it's only a matter of time. It starts with exclaiming things like "darn that was dumb" or "I'm kind of hungry", then you'll start asking yourself questions and answering them out loud. When I am outside, I am still somewhat able to keep it to myself, but I've started to catch myself conversing in public with nobody, and I sometimes have to blink very hard and rapidly

>You could just, not give a shit about what others think and do stuff
Trying to think of stuff to do. Kinda hard when there's no one to go with you anywhere. Probably should get my driver's license so I can at least drive into wall.

If you can make it to 30 having been mostly sober, you should stay that way. That shit just causes you more and more trouble the older you get.
t. 29 year old alcoholic who's been drinking since 18

im twenteen-one fuck you're shitty thrade

do you still like the memes here even though you're a grandpa fuck? or are you here to blog?

> 21
> that spelling

You might as well end yourself now

>t. muslim who never drank
I don't know why I didn't drink. Was it my adherence to my religion or to my parents? I think 75% of the muslims I knew drank and smoked weed (at least) on the side.

I don't know what would be the outcome if started drinking now.

Has anyone caught you speaking to yourself out loud?

Yes, but it was a cashier at 7/11 who's probably seen it a hundred times. If it's happened other times, I never noticed and the person never focused any attention to it. At this point, I'm more worried about what I don't notice rather than being noticed by other people. I usually feel invisible, so maybe being noticed wouldn't be so bad

tomorrow I turn 20 and I'm just like OP
Any tips to not be like that in my 30's?

I do this when something embarrasing I did in the pops in my mind. I say stuff like "no" or "oh god" very loud and realize it only after. Kinda embarrasing itself desu

>I usually feel invisible, so maybe being noticed wouldn't be so bad
I guess. Do you notice yourself speaking out loud? Like does it feel involuntary?

do what your mom tells you to do

>I do this when something embarrassing I did in the pops in my mind.
It's like your own mind betrays you.

make sure you're economically viable enough to get your own place.

Keep in contact with other humans. Don't let yourself drift into solitude. Make the effort to call people and make plans, even if they don't reciprocate or whatever. It's for your own benefit.

Eventually you might find some cool people that like you back. Also become a regular somewhere, it's a nice feeling and gives you the option to feel comfortable somewhere that isn't your home.

I think I do, but I'm not sure anymore. It kind of feels like I'm half in reality and half dissociated most of the time, as if my thoughts are more pertinent to my attention than whatever is right in front of me. I probably end up staring at a wall for 10-20-40 minutes just talking to myself. The same happens in bed, when I am waking up and going to sleep, and my showers are very long because I am re-enacting events that happened in my life or altering my memories with hypothetical scenarios. Sometimes I am not 100% sure if something actually happened or if I just simulated it in the shower, and as someone who has never had any mental health issues back when I was living a normal life, that's the shit that really scares me. But, since I went to college and got a degree in science (biology), I am also fascinated in observing these events first-hand, as if I am my own research project and I am learning what the effects of social isolation really can do to a person that is, by all accounts, a free man who can voluntarily leave at any time.

>we're just supposed to exist and not bother anyone else.
This can't be it. It's one thing to have no meaning, it's another thing to exist only in misery. I think suicide for me is becoming a real option, I've never been this miserable.

I mean I know my perspective is different since I'm a full blown alcohol, but I still say if you made it this long without a crutch, just don't start.

>as if I am my own research project and I am learning what the effects of social isolation really can do to a person that is, by all accounts, a free man who can voluntarily leave at any time.

Is this a narrative you constructed for yourself?

>in public
>remember something I did like 13 years ago
>scream out "OH NIGGER! FUCK"
>hide my face in my hands, possibly start hitting myself a few times
>look around and see the people looking at me
>don't know how to fix it
>briskly walk away muttering "Nigger" over and over snapping my fingers

Gonna be 30 soon. Strange thing it, older I get, worse I isolate myself from the society. I spent most of my childhood and teenage years alone, then had a short break from 20 to 22 and then from 24 to 27, but other than that always just alone. Last nearly three years were pretty much old times nothingness.

I just want race war to already start.

No, I think this is my objective perception of this situation. I could very easily kill myself right now, but I haven't because I consider my life to my valuable. I could go out on the streets and act like a madman for laughs, I could start breaking laws, etc, but I don't. Even if my situation is deplorable and considered unfit for even an animal to go through, I still value the stability over death or jail. Though sometimes I do consider going to jail just so I could maybe make friends. There are obvious downsides, but street rats seem to all have friends, and if these disgusting wastes of human skin are able to experience more happiness in life than I do, then maybe I could learn something from them. I would also maybe finally meet a girl (albeit a disgusting nigger or fat girl, why not both?), since those guttertrash in the ghettos all seem to get laid and have multiple illegitimate bastard children. Besides, if I can't get a job but those criminals can, maybe the issue isn't my education or previous work experience or shit personality or my spiraling insanity, maybe I just need to have a more interesting life and a white guy that goes to jail has to be more interesting than one that locks himself in his own cage.

Just came in my onahole, getting ready to apply for more jobs but probably going to procrastinate all day like I have been doing for the past few years

>but I still say if you made it this long without a crutch, just don't start.
Whole world seems to be run on having a drink though. There have probably been moments in my life where it would have forked differently if I had taken up the offers for a drink after uni/work.

Jesus, does this happen often? Sometimes I wonder if the crazy people on the street are just our future selves?

Well, aren't hobos just NEETs to the max?

>Well, aren't hobos just NEETs to the max?
I suppose.

this repeating words shit gets worse for me. Sometimes when I'm alone (I gladly share my appartment with 2 other people, otherwise I'd be insane by now) especially in the afternoon after getting up I repeat one word or phrase hundreds of time in the end even screaming it. Sometimes I even feel the urge to text people that word or phrase. There is no connection to anything though, it's completely random.

Have you ever got it checked out?

what do you mean checked out? I'm aware of the fact that it's not normal. I'm still pretty functional so I don't worry about it. If it interferes with my everday's life I'd see a doctor I guess

>If it interferes with my everday's life I'd see a doctor I guess
Does it annoy you?

I don't know if I can do anything without finding people to talk to. I was actually doing some learning by myself which was going well but then loneliness put a halt to everything. I'm so desperate to have a conversation.

Bump. Come on man, stay a little while. I got no friends.

38yo Intp no gf, no friends , no social life

the plus side is i have no debt

>the plus side is i have no debt
I mean...like, is it really a comfort? Being debt-free is great but it's like when I get paid my measly wage and I don't spend it on anything because there's nothing or no one to spend it on.

Corpses are debt-free too

Why do these threads peter out nowadays?

>be me
>sad
>read this thread
>not sad
thank you, virgins

I really should have self-harmed. It's almost embarrassing having no scars and being this depressed.

Because some retard decided to randomly make it 30+ instead of the 25+ threads we have been having for years

And at peace.

How is that embarrasing? Shows strength more than anything.

the reason I browse r9k desu

My life has devolved into periods of fapping, eating and sleeping. Then regret of wasting energy of fapping and over-eating and having a horrible sleeping schedule.
So it mostly consists of waiting till I can not fap, not eat, and not over-sleep which I usually do anyway but I don't do anything constructive.
I just sit here, bored out of my mind, yet unable to do anything about it. I have this assumption that tomorrow I will have more energy, but more energy and motivation just increases the urge to fap and eat, which just resets the timer.
Life isn't supposed to feel like one big chore? Where everything is an obligation, even playing video games, watching a stream, watching movies / TV-shows, listening to music, socialize, work all feels like chores. It's mentally exhausting once the novelty wears off (2-30 minutes, depending). Then it just becomes a waiting game till I'm finished.

You got Discord? Sounds like you'd be a good fit for mine.

No, I don't want to associate with people I'd meet on Jow Forums (no offense)

>strength
Pffft. I'm still miserable with or without the scars. At least with scars I'd have a talking point.

Sounds a lot like me but, those rare, rare, rare moments when somehow, somewhere I have a conversation with someone who isn't talking to me out of pity, I don't feel so bad.

>thinks he's too good for us
>still browses
>still comes to the 30+ threads

Fair. People here are degenerates and I'm no exception. Thing is though, I'm proud of it.
Wish I could help, man.

living by yourself is such a jew conspiracy to get you to waste money. better to live with parents, save money. not like the average robot is going to make friends or get a gf to justify living by yourself. even living with a housemate i think is pointless, chances are they'll have a better life then you and it will just drive you insane seeing how much better everyone else has it then you.

I only browse Jow Forums when I'm bored. I clicked on this 30+ thread because I'm 25 and trying to figure out what to do with my life.

I'm not a degenerate, just a failed normie

All these anons going mad and talking to themselves at home are soft as fuck. I've been alone for years and it suits me just fine. I just wish my dick would give me a break. If I didn't feel lust I would be an Ultraloner.

Even smalltalk is bliss now, I'm not good at it, but talking about something that isn't my problems can be relaxing. When I don't feel judged for my lack of success - which is uncommon at this stage.
I do have a sister who's also mentally ill, and a friend of hers (with gigatits) that's also mentally ill. I don't like talking to either of them, but I lack the self-respect to say no. I instead (as mentioned) feel obliged to say yes to invites, or at least don't say no even though it bores me. Not like I will spend the time better, sitting in front of this screen rotting, despairing and waiting for bedtime.

You're a person that browses Jow Forums, dipshit.

Lad, your sister may well be trying to hook you up.

I wasn't saying you were, my dude.
Never heard the word "gigatits" before. I hope I never do again.

>Never heard the word "gigatits" before.
How the fuck have you been browsing Jow Forums and not hear that?

Been here since 3 hours ago user. My only other experience was looking at greentext memes, most of which were wholesome.

She definitively isn't.
She's overly protective, and incapable of trusting people, so when she goes out to smoke, she comes back angry and attempt to want to know what she missed and if it was about her. I thought there was a spark between me and the friend, but "I see you as a friend and don't want a relationship"-blabla. They are both rotten in their own ways, just like me. I, however, gain next to nothing, if not only negative things out of being around them. But still unable to put my foot down and say no.

She rocks H or I-size, so yes, giga.

I really hope she isn't skinny. The mere thought of a skinny girl with fucking cowtits like that makes me want to hurl.