So yesterday I made a thread about how my roommate asked me to hang out with him, his girlfriend, and her friend today...

So yesterday I made a thread about how my roommate asked me to hang out with him, his girlfriend, and her friend today. This has never happened to me before so I went out of curiosity and took quick notes on my phone throughout the experience in order to copy, paste, and then elaborate on them as a post when I got back to my PC. I promised and I would greentext it and made this temporary trip for it. If the time is not included in that greentext portion, then it was not an original note and is me elaborating on the previous note. I live in Newfoundland so that's where the times are based off of. Here's what I have.
>4:30-ish PM: Roommate (R) and I meet his girlfriend (G) and her friend (S) outside of the university library
>4:45 PM: R driving us to shitty Chinese place that S's friend works at, Soundcloud rap is on in the car that S and R are singing to, R and G in front seats, S and I in back
>5:10 PM: Waiting for food, S greets her friend who is an Asian girl, G asks about my hobbies and I respond honestly
>Inquires about what about music is it that I'm into, say I play a couple instruments, sing, and am a music enthusiast
>When asked what kind of music I'm into, give a half truth of an answer, lie and say hip hop but then proceed to list off modern hip hop artists that I actually do enjoy, they know two out of the four I list
>G says she used to play trumpet in middle school, S says she's really into hip hop too and lists off some mumble rappers
>5:25 PM: Food arrives, R and G feed each other noodles
>Asked everyone how it is, "good"
>Get S talking about Netflix, prattles on about shows I've never heard of but I say I've been meaning to get around to watching them
>S remarks on how tall I am when we leave the restaurant
>6:15 PM: In movie theater waiting for Aquaman to start, bought a medium popcorn, soda, and sour patch kids which I say anyone is welcome to

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>G cuddled up to R, S sitting uncomfortably close to me (leaning on our shared armrest) talking about Game of Thrones since the Aquaman actor was apparently in it
>know enough about it since my faggot cousin loves it so much, say "It may be a basic answer since they're the first protagonists introduced, but I've always loved the Starks over any of the other houses"
>she agrees and talks about how sad she was when Rob died
>6:30 PM: Capeshit starts, would rather have gone to see Vice
>endure 2 and a half hours of torture while G and R make out and do hand stuff, S and I are slumped over in our seats sharing popcorn
>9:00 PM: Movie finally fucking ends, they want to go to a party happening on campus
>Don't want to go, want to go back to dorm and take my shrooms, instead say I have an essay I was hoping to wrap up early
>their conversation almost immediately stops and their expressions change, R and G beg me to stay, I insist on going back, S now kind of looks worried
>9:30 PM: R drops me off at dorm and then comes up to room with me
>ends up asking for me to come to the party again, ask why it's suddenly so important to him that I hang out with them, he had the whole first semester
>says he just thought I might want to have some fun is all, tell him I'm just really not into whatever kind of party they'll be going to, he leaves
>post this
That was basically it. Can anyone else add their thoughts to what happened tonight? It felt very foreign and strange to me.

what did you expect, or rather, what did you want from the whole event?

I'm not entirely sure, but I was hoping it would be fun but it was just really boring. Going to a party would have just been agitating too, I fucking hate being around drunks, I know that too well from my dad. It all seems off too, like why my roommate all of a sudden cares about my social life, so I mostly did it out of curiosity. Especially since I've never hung out with people before.

i think they might be trying to set you up with the friend or theyre just trying to be nice and youre an aspie

I had considered the first possibility but I don't really care about dating her or having sex with her so it's irrelevant to me. I don't know why all of a sudden he'd agree or want to do that either.
How can someone suddenly decide to be nice after practically ignoring me for an entire semester? It doesn't add up. The whole night felt forced, as if there was some intention behind it, but I kept my cool and I don't think I came off as too strange.

you seem too self absorbed, friend. There are times for your consciousness to be inside you; that's when you're alone. The whole thing about socializing is letting your consciousness out to share with other people, or to get something from them. For me is sex, I fucking love sex, that's the only reason I got out to parties or social events on the general.
I think it'll be easier if you know yourself and know what you want from every social occasion.

You might not alcohol but it fucking helps, a lot. Back when I was 18, 19, I used to be horribly self conscious about my actions in social enviroments, I became a casual alcoholic, it really helped. not saying it's the best way to get over it, but it fucking helps, as a crutch if you might.

Holy shit

meant to

I mostly want other people to leave me alone because they're not interesting and they tend to be parasitic.
I have basically nothing in common with my roommate, his girlfriend, and her friend so I fail to see why I should desire interaction with them if I find it boring and unsatisfying.
If I did want to socialize with people, I'd want to actually be comfortable around them, be able to share my consciousness with them, and have some actually fun things in common with them.

hard to say

IF what you say about him ignoring you for months then all of a sudden really wanting you to hang out with them is true, then sounds like G was going to hang out alone with S for the night and R used you as company for S to get his time with G. after you bailed and made it akward for S id guess R and G will end up in a fight tonight since he probably vouched for you to keep S company.

so whats with not liking S? from the story it sounds like she likes you

sounds like you think you're too good to be around "common" people (whatever the fuck that means). I am a cultured person, or believe to be so, but that doesn't stop me from having good casual fun, with people who might not share interests with me.

Well, in any case, you should let go of whatever concept you have of yourself, not completely of course, but use it to your benefit. Your personality should not be this static thing, it should evolve to your needs and wants. That's why I cannot stress enough how important it is to know what you want from people.

I had to pretend, which I hate doing. Why should I need to lie about superficial nonsense like what media I do or do not consume in order to feel accepted? I lied this time in order to see where it was going, like I said I was curious, but a genuine relationship should feel like what said, but I don't feel comfortable sharing my consciousness with someone I don't click with. The last time I felt like I didn't need to put on airs, lie, or mask myself was around my brother.
I doubt we'd have anything in common either. I'm sure our ideas of "fun" are at complete opposites. She can go to a party and get drunk if she wants, I can trip and play music.

>be able to share my consciousness

being comfortable and sharing etc comes with time, it doesn't just click right away, life isnt a movie. Your expectations are too high, just force yourself, youll be glad you did later.

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How hot was s? do you not have any libido at all? I do agree with u about the other shit but could atleast have fucked s?

You sound exactly like me, consider that you are using requirements like "genuine relationship" and "I had to put on airs" as defense mechanisms for actual fear towards intimacy, or something else.

On another front, you see yourself as special or removed from society, but consider that everyone else also does this and you are really not that special, and that socializing with a slightly above average girl (in terms of connecting with you) is the best you can reasonably get.

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>i had to pretend
that was your choice, nothing implied you had to.

That's a fair point I suppose. It would be helpful if I could maybe have any kind of say in what we were to do, but I was not asked and as the newcomer I figured it would not be appropriate to try and force a new direction for the evening.
Maybe a 6 or 7 out of ten. I don't really care about sex, it seems like a fleeting pleasure I could do without personally. I prefer other stimulation. From a chemical standpoint, I am on Lithium for a diagnosed personality disorder which is known to kill libido. I haven't masturbated in several months.
I don't see myself as special at all. I just think I'm realistic about what I want and how others conduct themselves around me. There's no beneficial outcome for myself that I can see in being with these particular people, so I see no point in participating.

Everything implied I had to. Conformity is the only way to live in the modern world, and refusal to accept this is blindness and ignorance.
Deviation from the norm would have left me labeled as crazy or rather than introverted, which I would prefer. You're lying to yourself if you can say to me that you don't lie about who you are and pretend for the sake of others on a daily basis. It's exhausting, so why try if it's not exciting in some way.

what about you is so different that you need to hide. if you didnt care about these people why do you feel a need to conform to them.

and no i dont feel i lie about who i am to anyone. do you believe everyone is this massively unique individual who is suppressing who they are to meet social norms?

Everything I am is in opposition to the world I see around me. I don't think right and if it scares me, it most certainly would scare others. Hiding is a natural defense to the threat of complete social ostracism should I choose to act out, speak my mind, or be honest with others.
I wanted to see where it was going and what it was like since this has never happened to me before. It seems to be a waste of time though, I didn't get anything out of it and I have more questions than answers now. In fact, all I did was lose time and money instead. I could've finished my work for the weekend or gone to the gym or practiced the song I've been perfecting and writing.
I don't believe anyone is unique, and that's the problem. It's like I see the same people everyday, watch the same news, see the same advertisements, and it scares me. It's like everyone's voice has been drowned out in harsh static. As far as individual people are concerned, I just don't mesh well with them. Everyone is unique in their own right of course, you can't deny that, but conformity is the ultimate controller. Most unique qualities that a person possesses will be conditioned out of them or suppressed.

user, I think you need help
These aren't the thoughts of a normal person

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