/r9gay/ - #596

First for finding a cute cowboy bf like this. I'm not sure if I deserve him anymore.

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just went to a party and i feel worse than i thought i would

you don't because you wont stop posting about it

hahahaha lol :P

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>cant make thread because I'm outside
>its the same shitpost edition as the last time i didnt make the thread
restaurants are a mistake

yeah parties have a way of making holes in your heart

i hate that i like my friend. i don't even know if he likes them, this girl might have told him. now he's becoming distant and ignoring my texts. hes my only friend and i don't know what to do

I can't get him out of my mind okay

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why is that? i feel like i always get trapped in my own mind after parties

>ywn take control of the galaxy with your qt blonde brat bf

Life sucks man

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yeah iktfb
but I still like them because it's better than nothing

give a smol dicklet bf now.

i'm losing him as a friend because of it i think

aaaaaaaaaaaaaa why does everyone suck

because our reality sucks and we are products of it

what do you mean
feels

i have asked to do stuff with him that we've done before many times and he has said no every time i ask

it would be interesting to know who the cutest user who browses /r9gay/ is
like if you could calculate cuteness somehow, and we all posted our results
i wonder...

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>tfw no bf that would need to get on his tiptoes just to hug me

it's me, sorry to break it to you user

Maybe he's just not horny

no sorry it's actually me
checkmate atheists

Can't you both be the cutest user?

it's only 10:30 but i'm so tired and everything is so boring
should i just go to bed and dream about a bf instead of trying to stay awake?

>tfw no sleepy bf to tuck into bed

>I'm tired and have nothing to do
>should I go to bed

um, yes?

okay, then to sleep i go
goodnight anons, be well
sleep well whenever you end up turning in

what are you drinking tonight and playing lads? alternatively what are you reading or watching?

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I'm playing some L4D2. What are you doing, fren?

checked, gonna play some warband later and might read some lit if I don't get too drunk

Castlevania OoE, I'm farming rare drops

Playing Dark Souls III, just started a ng+ so I'm enjoying over-leveled heaven while I can.

What is it that you're drinking?

I like to be buzzed

>no vidya dev bf

from the looks of it you're already gone

But what are you drinking, fren? Is it vodka?

no I haven't drank anything
yep based clean ass burnetts vodka

Sounds like you'll be having a fun night, tbqh.

How many of you would say you'd be a 10/10 if you had the body you wanted? I don't mean something like height, I mean more along the lines of weight. I saw a few people say that they have an easily 7/10 face but they were fat, too skinny, not enough muscle, etc. No one will know if you answer we're still all Anons so you can avoid bullying if you reply to yourself

Pic related, it's only natural for a fruit to drink fruit brandy

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I probably have a 1/10 personality. I'm cruel, lazy, anxious, autistic, hateful, ect. So for that reason I can't be a 10. Physically though I have a really good face and height so a perfect fit body would make me a 9 or 10

it's only natural for a fruit to get his berries squeezed, so get ready user

I have an ugly face but decent femboy body I think

please tell me I'm not the only one who cannot stand the taste of alcohol. Seriously, I've tried everything from beer and cider to wine and spirits, I cannot stand anything with alcohol in it.

I probably should have added personality into the mix but I felt it was too broad or too common of an answer.
A lot of people are understandably more content with someone that has a good body and a bad face rather than the other way around

I got a baby face and I'm a top. But I don't really got a great jawline. I don't know how to calculate cuteness. It's difficult when you don't really fall into any category.

I've spread for easy access squeezing, I'm waiting user

I'm home from work, why don't you have dinner ready user!? Do you think I work this hard to come home hungry and having to wait for dinner? Don't you know how to do anything right?!

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height is a part im missing, if I were 5 in taller and had some abs Id be boipussy crusher king
all I can really do is take advantage of my attractive features and maybe I can become a pussy crusher at least

this is how you become a statistic for gay domestic violence and end up with your face disfigured from hot oil

Ignore /r9gay/ threads
Sage em to hell.

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Same, my dad once told me beer might taste bad but it makes food taste better (and it does, at least for me), I also tried tequila once but it fucking burned my tongue and throat.

I guess it's not so much about the taste but about the effect. Ask someone who actually drinks, maybe?

at least 80 of these have to be really obvious sarcasm

I meant 80% woops
Also, ILILIL? This entire compilation has to be at least a year old, minimum.

>tfw user didn't get his diet Dr. Kelp

I didn't include height just because it was something a lot of people should look past. Is your lack of abs just because a lot of fat or just not having them at all?

*breaths in* SQUEEEEEEEEZ

This is why I internally plug my nose whenever I drink
Removes like 60% of the taste

not having them, if it didnt mean giving up all the food I love I could have them but id sooner become a disgusting fat blob than give up anything food related over a pointless diet
and I dont really put too much thought into height but ive been rejected soley on that point and only by guys so I think if I was taller itd be easier to be gay

>tf no bf to pIay hytale with aIl always

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play a different game user you homo

You're welcome user, I hope you enjoyed your squeezing experience

>tfw no bf to spend all always with

>tfw no bf to play realm of the mad god with

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Greg is disappointed with your life choices.

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>no bf to bite me really hard

why live bros

I'm your guy user I'll bit your butt cheeks until you cry

I don't want to go to work tomorrow. Someone convince me to call in sick.

>bf bites me really hard on my chest
>love it
>love it A LOT
>for the rest of the day it feels like im hyper-aware and happy
am i masochistic

>tfw no bf with sensitive nipples so I can flick them through his shirt whenever it's cold
>tfw I'd want to do it all the time regardless

so biting/nipple play is our new edging now, good to know

Anyone looking for a weeb e-bf to keep you company ;)

Let me know and we can get to know each other on discord.

>discord
Something seems off.

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Discord is what threw you off but not e-bf or ;)?

If i had a bf i would refuse nipple play.
Old gay guys have the worst nipples and it wouldn't be worth it

i don't think it's gay exclusive for old people nipples to look bad, besides at that age i don't really think anyone's going to see them aside from your bf

i see them.
i used ti see them every day. my math professor's nipples were like that

>Old gay guys have the worst nipples
old guys have the worst everything

wtf I want bites now

ignoring the fact that you somehow saw his nipples through his shirt, how would you know that they turned out that way because of nipple play?

because he's a homosexual
>ignoring the fact that you somehow saw his nipples through his shirt
the entire point is that i can see his nipples through his shirt from his [i'm assuming] nipple play.
and it wasn't just him but he's the most recent example.

i don't really think nipple play does that though, unless it's borderline torturous or just excessive. not to mention you don't even know if that's the reason why he looked like that

Other user is right, it's like thinking your asshole is gonna turn inside out just from having anal at a moderate rate for a few years.

Which qt is gonna watch me edge tonight :^)

I'll watch if you don't expect me to talk or show you anything.

That's fine, contact?

i have such a headache i feel like i'm smouldering

Send me an email with yours.

[email protected]

I thought you wanted someone to watch you user?