Hey user, are you a virgin?

>Hey user, are you a virgin?
>Hey user, are you single?
>Hey user, tell us about your exes

how do you answer these questions when you aren't expecting them?

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>how do you answer these questions when you aren't expecting them?
I do not put myself in a situation where I will ever be asked such questions.

The only winning move is not to play.

no, yes, i really sont want to talk about that.
lie lie and lie again

>yea why you take my virginity? I'd gladly take yours
>yea but if you wanna be my gf tonight i dont mind
>idk i havent seen your sister in a while

>Hey user, are you a virgin?
>Hey user, are you single?
>Hey user, tell us about your exes

Depends on the situation and crowd. If it's a bunch of people I don't know well, I will lie. Otherwise, I will usually be honest and say I've never really tried either way. When asked to explain myself how that could be, I explain. I don't really have an answer other than "I don't know why. It could be x." It has led to some talks with stereotypical advice that I have not followed. However, it hasn't really come up much.

prevention is all well and good but you need a bit of preparation too. Are you just gonna stutter and freeze up when it happens?

Easy.
"Fuck off."
Plain and simple.

>yes
>no
>well one is an actually insane cunt who literally stalked me for three days after the breakup and eventually went to the hospital because she cut herself too hard. another one was a nice girl, and the other one cheated on her boyfriend with me for a total of six months without either me, nor the boy friend knowing.

so yeah

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I'm the guy from this post, I could have fucked but I was scared and always said no

No, yes, one was crazy and the other was a military wife i was dating behind his back for months until she gota preggo with his kid before the divorce.

This never fucking happens, dumbass.

Yes, I'm still a virgin
Obviously I'm single
If i had exes the other two questions would be irrelevant to this one.

why is the qt on the right holding the redshirt qts arm?

Answer truthfully, they smell it anyway. They are usually disgusted, but sometimes a pack mentality will enrage them as they are unable to comprehend the ability to abstain from sex. This is dangerous because they may attempt to rape you and take that purity from you. Drag you into the mud with them. Be strong.

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>No
>No
>I prefer GNU\Linux

>Yes
>Yes
>Don't have any
Too easy dumb roasties

>yes to all because i don't give a fuck
>but not in a chad way, i simply lack and never had any self esteem

>yes
>yes
>don't have any
What's the big deal about it? I imagine its fairly obvious to those that know me that I'm completely apathetic towards women.

What if you're at work (the only social interaction I get) and you walk in on some co-workers talking about it? What then?

Holy fuck how old are you? This would make you the coolest kid in 8th grade.

Literally no non-autist will ask you out of the blue if you are still a virgin. Question 2 is easy, just say yes. It's no shame to be single it's only a shame to act like a pussy about it.
>Tell us about your exes
>"I'd rather not"
people still value privacy in the states dont they
Done

Just brag about how big your dick is and how many girls you fuck. They say girls don't buy that shit but I call bullshit, if you can say it with enough testosterone and confidence in your voice those dumb cunts will believe anything

The one on the very Right

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>Hey user, are you a virgin?
Yes, I'm voluntary celibate
>Hey user, are you single?
Like you'd ever be interested, besides I'm focused on God now.
>Hey user, tell us about your exes
Well all I can say is I got tossed around alot and there was some Emotional pain as expected, but that is in the past now.

I dont know, Lets find out yeah?

yes. Thats why im debt free! xD

Well my last ex was 5 years ago, she was a russian lady, she was 10 yrs older than me, she was 33. And she had a daughter. She was a milf. And i mmmm. i miss that milf, she was so fun to play with. and she was pretty hot! she could take care of me :)

She had like 3 houses, and just rented rooms out for money. i met her cause i was a tenant.

>Hey user, are you a virgin?
Yes I am a virgin.
>Hey user, are you single?
Yes I am single.
>Hey user, tell us about your exes
I have never had any exes.

Because I am Buddhist I always have to tell the truth.

no
yes
no
and then leave

no
yes
interesting, one always wanted to see me pee, even when we were in school.
fuck i miss being 14, having these chats with my m8s with the 4 beers each, that our parents gave us to go camping. fucking 26 now, i'd pay girls to even look at me, let alone ask to see me take a piss

Im 22 and I'm a huge manchild. Tho I wouldnt say any of those IRL, save maybe for the third one.

>Yes.
>Yes.
>I don't have any.

I ran out of fucks to give years ago.

>are you a virgin?
No I tear it up everyday
>Hey user, are you single?
No
>Hey user, tell us about your exes
I am good. Thanks.
Then proceed to ask them personal questions.

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>Hey user, are you a virgin?
If i said yes would you take my virginity?

>Hey user, are you single?
single biggest faggot in this room.

>Hey user, tell us about your exes
nah fuck ya'll im going home.i told myself this was just a set up for all of you to make fun of me before i came and clearly i was right.

>defensive replies.

That's the only way you look like a loser; when they can tell you're bitter about it.

>Yea
>Yea I am
>Can't talk about what I don't have
These are usually followed with some pitying comment if a guy asks, or insults if asked by a girl

>Hey user, are you a virgin?
No, i fucked your mom, son/daughter.
>Hey user, are you single?
Your mom is my gf, but i do cheat on her from time to time.
>Hey user, tell us about your exes
I prefer to not talk about your grandma.

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