/sig/ - self improvement general

Guys, I'm at that point of nofap where I actually feel more confident and outgoing but at the same time can't concentrate for shit because I think only about sex and fucking: sometimes I find myself looking at some pretty girl and I can't help but imaging to take her right there and give her my babies.
How do I get over this stage?

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Just fap one in a while. Not to porn tho

Sadly, there are very few in the west

Imagine trying to get in them panties and she says she isn’t in the mood. Fuck you ‘gon do?

I can't help but to think about fapping again like a defeat, after getting this far (3 weeks, I know it's not a lot but I never actually managed to get this far)
...uh...I'm afraid to answer to that, right now

I'm getting more and more attracted to the whole MGTOW ideology. At least the pure version, which in my opinion is: don't commit yourself to anyone so you can live your life to the fullest. The women-are-cancer version is just sad.
I asked the question to seek an answer for something I've been stuck with for quite a while: do I want to be in a relationship or not? I've never been this content in my entire life and I'm afraid of having it destroyed. I've never had a relationship, so it's hard for me to gauge the impact. I wouldn't mind continue living alone like this, but maybe a relationship can raise the bar even higher.

MGTOW....we don't care about women...now let's talk about women constantly and how much they suck.

Men's Rights, PUA, all those stupid groups essentially obsess for the thing they hate, invent their own buzz words and communally masturbate.

Repost from the old thread.
I just got rejected for a job after an interview that I felt went reasonably well. They wanted someone with more experience and I'm just finishing up with Uni. It was not unexpected, but it hit much harder than I thought, maybe because I really liked this place. What gets me even more is that others around me are getting jobs and good opportunities, despite being less/just as qualified. I've done everything 'right' so far, and it just sucks so much that there is no payoff for me (yet).
Any advice on dealing with this feeling?

Hey guys, just came to vent. In 2 weeks, ill be graduating high school, after that I have to find a job immediately. I dont know why I feel an overwhelming fear going out to world and becoming independent. But god dammit I need to do for my sake atleast. Wish me luck with my future interviews.

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good job user keep it up.

>I dont know why I feel an overwhelming fear going out to world and becoming independent.

that's all girls tho
fuck they gon do?

It's normal feeling fear in face of the unknown; good luck fren

I'm gonna be starting work 3rd shift soon. Any anons have tips for not falling into the pit of unhealthiness that tends to go with it?

What is work 3rd shift?

I'm trying so hard not to hate my ex right now, man. I've made that mistake before. She's making it so hard not to though, but hatred isn't the way the heal and it's not the path to growth. She had valid reasons for leaving me, and she has valid reasons for refusing to talk to me, even though we had a great relationship, but I just feel so let down after everything I put into that woman. I just wanted to say goodbye, that's all I fucking wanted after everything

I guess I'm not meant to though; I ain't giving up and this ain't the end, not even close

when im alone i feel genuinely happy 90% of the time but the last 10% im crippled by loneliness
when im social i never really feel happy and is drained 50% of the time
ive put a lot of thought into this, but i still dont know which is best/worse, to live is to suffer i guess

Take vitamin d3 supplements and omega-3

yep, /sig/ really is full of kids. never should have left Jow Forums

Why am I such an anxious bitch? I always make myself look stupid somehow by spilling spaghetti hard, and people love fucking with me because they can see how stupid I am

add 10% alcohol to your diet.

Your contentment is destroyed with a relationship for sure. But the second half of your life is better with a relationship.

Get a job. You'll get your fix for loneliness, albeit it with people you have no desire to be around. At least you'll get paid and not be depressed.

it depends how a particular workplace schedules their work shifts. 3rd shift if usually a night shift.

Is the loss of libido normal on nofap ?
I was horny as fuck 3/4 days go but sooner I was showering and tried to get it up with my imagination and nothing happened at all.

i have a job, but when im off i never socialize, i just stay home with myself

im thinking of getting a dog

I'm about a month, month and a half into things.

Down 18lbs, 40-50 to go. Things are going good. 165lb bench, 105 ohp, 225 squat and 275 dead. Hoping to be pretty close to goal weight by vacation in late July. We're all gunna make it anons

if those are people you know stop talking to them, if its coworkers they usually do it to show off their own status or to bond with each other by putting others down. spilling spaghetti often is either something medical or youre not used to social interaction as much as others. if you spend a lot of time alone in front of the pc your brain will adjust to that state. to not spill your spaghetti in social situations you need to be comfortable when youre in them. and for that you need experience so your brain knows what is likely to happen. and you need to get rid of your insecurities or at least not display them. also your brain has different modes of operation depending on if you accept a situation or if you instantly try to get away from it. kind of like dealing with shit or flight mode.

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dont get a dog when you live alone. thats not nice for the dog. also i doubt you will always want to walk him. maybe get 2 birds.

How do I get better friends /sig/? This is the third group in two years I’ve been in and it’s the third group in two years that no one fucking leaves their house, and I’m the only one suggesting things and everyone just ends up flaking anyway.
How do o find people that like to do things? Since I broke up with my gf a few months ago I don’t really have anyone close to me that I could just go out and do things with and since my friends group doesn’t do anything I’m starting to feel down.
I just want some good friends, why are they so hard to come by.

I work on a farm, nigger. I don’t know about this urbanite shit

>works on a farm
>calls someone else a nigger

I'm taking myself out of the cult of self-improvement. I'm no closer to my goals than when I started all this and it has become clear this isn't going to happen for me the effort would be completely pointless.

See ya

Need advice.
>be me
>going camping with my closest friends as we do every year
>this is the big trip to the Black Hills tho
>so hyped for this trip
>got friday off so we can leave Thursday
>turns out we're coming back monday
>oh shit I don't have monday off
>totally and completely my fault I was at planning meetings and saw the date on the calendar
>STILL fucked up requesting my time off
I am a total fucking shithead already. How should I approach this? Been playing it out in my head. I'm behind on my work, I would be a jackass coming in and asking for another day, especially with this already being a short weekend. I could play the sleezeball card and could lie about being sick or something. Honestly, my jobs probably cool with it, but it would feel like a bad move with my newly appointed team.
I don't know man. I'm really shit about this. Maybe I could offer to make up the time on the weekend, but it's the meetings on monday I'd hate to miss. Can someone just confirm its the right move to man up, own my mistake and not go camping.

I can't tell what's worse; the booze itself or what I do when I'm on it. Junk food while buzzed is setting me back in my weight loss goals. Any advice?

Think if you (for whatever reason) wanted to leave someone. You don’t need “a valid reason” other than wanting it and the other person isn’t entitled to anything you don’t want to give (an explanation, a goodbye, anything).

If you don't live in a compound with 4 wives and 36 children in deep Montana wilderness, you're an honorary nigger.

I think much of what’s posted here (cold showers, meditation) is bullshit. If your approach to self improvement was doing those things and not the hard ones, the ones that would really allow you to improve your life in particular, then I understand it.

Stop having them. ezpz

I need to leave this place.

But Jow Forums is the only place that understands me.

Yeah, quit drinking.

I'm oversimplifying this to a degree but MGTOW as a community is akin to the females who subscribe to 'radical feminism'. In the same vein as they preach they don't need any man, so do the MGTOW.
Taking care of yourself is not exclusive to MGTOW. You can still do that regardless, but with MGTOW its used as a means to fuel the bitterness for more "superiority" over others, especially the other gender. Regardless of whether you think women are cancerous or not, you will still have to deal with them and work with them. (Vice versa for those radical feminists too)
There's a saying "No man is an island onto himself".

What are some skill books I should read, I already the the ones mentioned at the start of the thread

You cant leave a day early?

could i get a good full body calisthenics routine? trying to get to 20+ pulls ups, 100 push ups, and 100 sit ups. currently at like 5, 30, and 50 respectively. going to join the air force and need to get fitter

Ok then. Sell me. What is something I can do everyday that is realistic, non-invasive and I would not have to force myself to make things better for myself?

your ancestors put cities to flame and sword, rode their stallions across the cold steppe, spread their gene, hunted, and lived. meanwhile you worry this hard about taking a day off work. you are GAY!

You’d want to know, wouldn’t you?

Was getting ready to fire my first person from work. I wasn't keen on it but was ready to do it. Anyway turns out he is resigning so i don't have to. I feel a little disappointed, since this would have been a hallmark in my career saying that 'yes I can fire people'. I'm not in a rush to do it, but it would have been nice to get my managerial virginity out of the way.

How has everyone else been doing in their career?

>march
>tired of feeling like a 5'9" fat drunk at 194lbs
>set out on a goal to give up booze and cut weight for three months
>be today with 14 days left of cut
>down to 166lbs and about 12%bf reading books and thinking positivly and feeling better then ever
Feels good bros. Just tryna shed 6 more pounds and eat at a defficet for the next 14 days before i start eating at a maintenance level and enjoying the summer with some cheat days here and there. WE ARE ALL GONNA MAKE IT! CONSISTENCY IS KEY!
Also, shout to the user that recomennded fried eggs and hot sauce for cutting, that shit is bomb as fuck and works like a charm

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Yep, about the level of help I expect from you guys at this point.

not him but youre a fag

>Please tell me how to live my life.
Nigger I don't know, maybe stretch every day or something.
Jesus.

Bump

I'd love to have some good, helpful advice for you, but I honestly don't know how I would deal in a constructive way. I guess I can tell you to not drown your sorrow in alcohol and food. Good luck user

Ok, I give up then. Obviously just from seeing how you guys act on here it's clear that all "self-improvement" does gives validation for being a mediocre, conformist piece of garbage, so I have no use. Hopefully some day you guys will wake up enough to know this society has nothing worth trying to salvage and the only true self-improvement is complete separation from it. Until then, go ahead and keep doing your duty to your masters and pretending you are not complete losers.

I'm not them but I thought this thread was about any kind of self-improvment, not just conventional salaryman with a wife and two kids and a suburban house dreams. I myself just want to be happy and I've realized eating terrible, staying sedentary, and not cleaning myself are not conducive to the goal. It's obvious but habits die hard and I like this thread for the general positivity.

If you want to start reading more or lifting weights or write philosophical treatises or record music then this thread should be useful, regardless of how much you conform to wagie life. It's okay to be NEET and it's okay to work.

This user gets it.
I hope good things come to you soon man!

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Any help with intrusive thoughts and sick fetishes? They haunt me. The more I leave Jow Forums, left to my own devices, the worse it gets. When I left here for 7 weeks, walking more, eating well, and going to therapy and meeting people, the fantasies became more sick and make me feel immense guilt. I've had them since I was 13 and used to have nightmares about them and they stopped recently. That's a worrying sign to me, that I'm slowly normalizing them. I can never actualize my goals like this.

>I was 13 and used to have nightmares about them and they stopped recently. That's a worrying sign to me, that I'm slowly normalizing them. I can never actualize my goals like this.
It depends on the fetish
If its something retarded like tiles Physically harm yourself until those urges go away

You're going to therapy already right? Why not talk to your therapist about this user?

Thanks man, it feels nice already to be heard and have a (you).
> I guess I can tell you to not drown your sorrow in alcohol and food
I don't drink, and my fiance had some food and cola for me when I got home after being away for 12+ hours for interviews.
Thanks for the support m8

I have seen many therapists and psychiatrists, none helped me at all. We'd chat about music or why I'm not working or bullying at school but when I brought up my fantasies they would laugh nervously and change the subject. I suppose it's my fault for not demanding they discuss it with me.
It's not autistic like tiles. I masturbate to hypothetical family trees of me and my niece. I want to be an Adam and Eve family that repopulates some plot of land, fishing by the sea and having 12 children who pair up as well, brother and sister, and multiply our seed across the land. I planned family trees going out for 300 years, at which point I had to separate genetic lines into separate villages. Then I start over, it's too complex. I'm afraid of if I become intimate with a female I could never share my true feelings and would always live a lie. How do I stop this? I've been this way since I first was going through puberty.

>I suppose it's my fault for not demanding they discuss it with me
But that's what you're paying them to do though...

How do I become good at (funny) storytelling.
Even If I did something cool or fun, I never am able to create a cool story around it.

>went from friendless anxiety ridden NEET to having friends, hobbies and a job
>can talk to girls without overthinking
I miss that last piece to be truly sociable.
I want to be more present in conversations.

They said it was normal to have thoughts about your family. I'm scared to go in detail like I did here because they might lock me up again. I've already been in hospitals and a group home, I can't take it again. So I have to get help elsewhere.

it sounds like you have a real disorder, user. you shouldn't be in denial about it, be honest and forthright with your doctors about what you're experiencing. its the only way to get better. are you on any medications?

You can do it. Try to put your self out there and get a proper entry level job somewhere and not just start working at your local fast food joint. You will thank your self latter down the line. Try to find an industry that interests you.

I used to be. They did nothing but make me a zombie. I've tried countless meds, antidepressants, antipsychotics, stimulants, benzos, etc for depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and derealization. The only good thing was how they zapped my libido and I spent my late teens without bad fantasies. Otherwise I was a mess, sleeping 18 hours a day and eating a fridge. I'll arrange for a new psychologist and spill my guts completely. If I'm locked up, well, shit, it would happen eventually. Thanks user for reassuring me that it's what I need to do.

Try and get the day off of work and make sure to keep up on your responsibilities at work otherwise. The days spent camping will be worth far more to you than another day at work. If you can't get off work then you can't get off and I don't think lying it worth it in the long run. Even for your own self respect.

that sounds awful, man, I really hope they can maybe figure out a better cocktail of pills or something, anything to fix that brain of yours. don't give up hope.

Just lol

I don't want to be chemically castrated, that's the big issue, I just want to be normal. I feel there has to be more than medications, like it's my thinking or a trauma in my life. It's too bad psychoanalysts don't exist anymore, it's all cognitive behavior therapy now. I feel that psychoanalyzers were on to something with the incest issue and wish Freud were here to help. There must be some key to ending this madness locked away inside me.

I have the same dude. I'm scared of quitting Jow Forums and masturbation. I have to keep my self occupied at all times. I am a 19 khv.

That's actually kind of the point I was trying to make. Every time I come here to get advice, it's always stuff that is about fitting in with society, which is not what I'm wanting.

Has anyone here managed to improve themselves and "cure" their gay thoughts?

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That picture, that's what making it is.

Are you the buzzcut guy? I'd still suck your dick bro, nothing wrong about gay thoughts. No homo

>Are you the buzzcut guy?
No

I started NoFap like 2 weeks ago as an exercise in self-control. Now I can easily resist temptation from food and procrastination. Strong-ass placebo.

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Stop watching porn.
I've read many instances where porn caused gay/bi thoughts.

Not him, but I noticed something similar. The more I fap to porn, the more I'm drawn to trannies.

Have you tried doing things without your friends? Say that "hey i am gonna do X on friday, its gonna be fun you should join" and just go if they want to or not. Put up a snap or something so they see you doing stuff and they might start joining. I heard people doing that and it worked

I got a problem that i have friends and they want to do shit but i am broke as fuck so i can't join and i spend a lot of time at home. Sucks

>I can't tell what's worse; the booze itself or what I do when I'm on it.
What kind of thinking is that? Does does what you do when you are on it exist when you are not on it?

Anyone just feel like shit mentally some days?

I woke up this morning feeling terrible

Every day i feel like i need to push myself out of the negative thought pattern i wake up with. I think, if you've been depressed for the majority of your life, it's something you'll always have to carry with you, overcome it, and fight it the next day all over again.

Most people have mental issues lol

>It's not autistic like tiles.
he said. But it was actually way more autistic than that.

I own the equipment. And if it had been 200 years ago, I’d have owned niggers too