"Happy Valentine's Day! We're giving out free condoms to promote safe sex! How many will you and your date need tonight...

>"Happy Valentine's Day! We're giving out free condoms to promote safe sex! How many will you and your date need tonight?"

So what's your reply?

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>>So what's your reply?

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"I'll just be jerking off tonight, none for me, thanks."

"Ill take two (2) please"
I then leave them in a drawer or in my closet and never open them and let them expire in a couple of years. How does it feel to jerk off with a condom on?

They are giving these out at most of the major paths at my uni. They tried to hand one to me and I just rolled my eyes. Felt pretty alpha desu.

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N-No need, I bought condoms earlier today. Thanks anyway though.

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I tried putting a condom on my dick once, it was loose. I realized something on that day.

Not great. Easy clean up tho.

>Eh, I'll take my chances.

Luckily the people in this country are so autistic that this kind of shit would be awkward as hell.

None, I buy my own but thanks.

This actually happened to me today, was walking to class and some student government kids were handing out condoms. Threw it away immediately.

I was given some in a student pack. They were too small. Had a fap with them for lolz.

>I don't think I'll be needing them.
>cue normie sympathy and pity

Thanks, I Don't have a date right now but i'm always looking for that last minute hookup. (winks at the one with the purple hair)

>"I find this highly offensive. Condoms are against my religion."
>mocking laughter and some quip about christianity
>"I'm [literally any other religion]."
>"Oh my god, we're so sorry."
>they pack up and leave

>that image

>I don't know, how many condoms do you want to use with me?
Then when I get rejected I go home and have a laugh about it and masturbate into the condom myself.
At least I'd have a laugh about it.

im glad you came out looking so good in this fictional interaction that encounter could have good anywhere

>a jew
>a fatso
>a mongrel


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>Felt pretty alpha

Yes. I'm sure she thought the same.

Is 5 ok?
>proceeds to never use them
But if I ever got a gf by miracle having 5 condoms laying around would be very helpful.

You know they have expiry dates, right? It won't be good to get some out and find they expired 3 years ago. Women always check the expiry dates and serial numbers on your condoms to make sure they have been bought recently.

>giving out condoms on a Catholic holiday

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Yeah ill take 3 for you guys

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those bitches are ugly
originally ugly

>Eye all of them quietly

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>uhhh uhhh, thanks I guess.
Then I would accept them and throw them away later.

>"Fucking hell. Sure as fuck you're not sleeping with anything tonight. I'd rather stick my dick in a fence"
>do a 360 and walk away

Alpha. lol. They probably know you're a virgin.

eye all three of them separately


I remember when they did a sex survey in college and these people came up to me in the library with a survey that asked tons of sex questions. They were laughing at me it seemed like, and they had to be able to tell I was a virgin. That was before I met black guys and started letting them fuck me. I went from 0-60 real quick and was having sex every day multiple times per day, just taking cock.

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I love the chubby girl on the right

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I'm at the point now where I would say "None" in my most withering tone possible and keep walking.

None of those girls have bfs. Each one of them are going to be single on v-day, and they'll probably spend the night putting a condom on their vibrators/cucumbers.

If they're single it doesn't mean celibate

damn, smooth af user. Props to you

Brave and new world pilled.

True, but the fact they're there handing out free condoms means they're currently not getting any dick. Might be a brief dry spell. Or maybe chad's shacked up with his favourite girl for the week.

Looks more like she's just wearing a heavy jacket.

They're girls on Valentine's Day. They can walk into any bar tonight and get dick.

The virgin walking by

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>I already bought some, but thanks
Not hard you fucking sperg

>"I only go in raw but thanks"

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