/r9gay/ - #622

I want an E-bf I can play video games and be romantic with
How do I get one? all the guys I talk to online are either straight or taken

if you have zero standards maybe? most of grindr is location based obviously but from what i've seen most anons on this thread say about it, it always ends up being gross old men. so yeah you could probably get laid anytime you want much like how any guy could fuck an ugly girl.

>gay standards are high
they really aren't.
>you a fat fag
dudes want you
>you a gym fag
dudes want you
>you a skinny feminine dude
dudes want you
>you masculine
dudes want you

ect ect ect

Step right up gentlemen and fellas! I'm selling a hunk of man today.
How can this be? It must be a mistake you cry! But NO I TELL YOU! I am selling user for the low price of one goodboy (You)!

Attached: 1484353951001.jpg (451x558, 82K)

average straight male match rate on tinder is around 1/120, if you get 1% you're actually noticeable above average
you're just delusional if you think men have the same insanely inflated standards of women
gaycels are volcels this is a fact

hey youre the dumbass from the other thread
i told you not to spread your low iq, please stop

Theres already a faggot thread you mongrel

I can't stop smelling my armpits it's so good. I can't explain it but it's sort of like yogurt or sour cream which is weird I haven't any dairy in like two weeks

haha i dont know what is going on lol

are boi braps cute?

Attached: 1547276113249.jpg (736x736, 84K)

as a boy who heavily braps I can say they're more erotic or embarrassing than cute.

Attached: 1522840621069.jpg (392x637, 153K)

Blow it out your ass
I've got balls of steel

>be in a discord server
>people who have friends and gfs/bfs calling others normies
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
This is too much for my autism. Also stop behaving like females you dumb niggers.

>erotic
what did he mean by this?

Those words can't exist together

Attached: 1523810881626.png (1200x723, 909K)

>tfw no bf that smells yummy

It feels good when you're humping the bed and you can't help but fart.

You're selling me?
But can't I be with you? You gave me a (you) and got dubs when you did it so you must be boyfriend material!

anal is something you have prep for, you can't just randomly decide to have anal

tfw too lazy to have sex

well you can, but you gotta clean house before hand, also lube

>not douching before everytime time you go in public and fasting while in public in case you'll get some dick

you can always suck dick and get your dick sucked

oral is lame, if there's no cock in ass what's the point

i want this
this is ideal

looking for friends and maybe a boyfriend, i'm fit-skinny and have brown hair and eyes. feel free to add me on discord Aske#9091

Attached: 1487188578748.png (744x687, 44K)

>aske
that's a scandinavian name isnt it?

Im not improved enough to be your boyfriend

>dabs on op's gay thread

Attached: rule 63 felix.jpg (750x562, 90K)

yes im from norway

>tfw gay and homophobic

But you could improve while you're my boyfriend! I'll give you emotional support while you do it!

Where are you from user. Im midwest america

I'm from Scotland
bit of a distance but I'm up for it if you are!

I got nothing to lose!

Nail#4193

i would have added you, but since you basically contactfagged like that, i say no

this is why bots don't have bfs, so fucking picky. lmaooooo

Do the guys always ghost you when they see your face?

>some guy flounders his discord asking for everybody to add him
>''im not gonna add you, go back to soc''
>this is why bots dont have bfs

>tfw not gay enough to date a guy
>tfw gay enough to love dick
>tfw badly want to play with a cock but would only trust a robot

>tfw no curious robot friend to let play with my cock

I wish I could find that user. I really do.

youtube.com/watch?v=cwdbLu_x0gY

what should my tinder bio say

don't list your hobbies
and don't forget to lie
good luck

>I can't stop smelling my armpits it's so good.
I also like how my armpits smell.

nice, can I smell them? I purposely don't wear deodorant just so I can smell myself and I hope future bf doesn't either

If you want to, I guess. I wouldn't exactly mind

*sniff* *sniff* aaaaa very nice armpits user, now you smell mine!

shave you fucking gorillas
hair is only acceptable on face

wrong, hair is acceptable everywhere BUT the face and ass. also shaving doesn't reduce smell, infact can make it worse

oh i'll make it worse you bet

>tfw no farm owning dom bf who's insex level kinky

On the bright side, I finally bought a plug that doesn't immediately destroy my asshole.

Attached: 1510766148586.jpg (604x603, 47K)

>tfw no bf to absolutely destroy my asshole through his giant cock, fisting, and toys

>tfw no bf to not practice anal sex with

>not practice anal sex
Then what's the point of being gay?

hand holding, kissing, frotting , cuddling, etc

Attached: 1525979406381.jpg (467x467, 47K)

>tfw no bf that would play video games while I hold him on my lap

here you go bro
homework done guaranteed
100% ghosting service
will turn you gay and then spit on your face

Attached: look at this nerd.jpg (2017x2017, 307K)

>dumb and pointless necklace
>that hairstyle
pass

>tfw this is the guy that tells everyone to anhero
>tfw this is the guy that spammed with a bot the entire r9k
to think a prestigious PhD!!student would behave in such a manner
absolutely disgusting.
resign.

I have no idea how to respond to your LARP post.

your entire life is a larp post

ty for the (You) qt

here's the attention you wanted
i hope it makes you happy ;)

Best I can do to show my appreciation is give (You)s back and bump this dead thread in the process

>tfw no gaymer bf to lewd while he's using multiplayer

glad someone is having fun

>tfw no bf

You mean to tease while he's on multiplayer voice chat?

>tfw can't feel anything
lets see some fireworks tomorrow

>You mean to tease while he's on multiplayer voice chat?
Yes

absolutely unforgivable

>Tfw no healslut bf to do lewd things for me over the mic

>tfw no bf that's using multiplayer voice chat while I suck his dick

>life is boring as fuck
>scared to change

>"Get on the objecive you fa-AHhHhHhaaa-faggots ah"

>tfw he loses attention while getting his dick sucked as he plays
pathetic

Yes, pretty much exactly like this

most videos i watch of the situation usually has the suckee not really reacting to it

i just wanna cuddle with a naked boy. maybe play with his boynips a little

nobody ever gets what he wants
there's always a catch

Then why no bf
Checkmate lib

boring fucking chode

If I love getting fucked in the butt, do I have to be gay?
I mean, I don't really feel anything romantic towards other males, I simply want to submit to them because it feels good to have my hole filled and my body caressed.

he has a bad boy body
dick is soft when looking at it
fucking disgraceful honestly
he must not allowed control!!!this will mean the end....

>If I love getting fucked in the butt, do I have to be gay?
You wouldn't have to be gay if it was my dick in your butt. We could literally just be friends that have sex exclusively with each other.

No need to be sorry angry
Have some pie

Attached: 1550499965948.gif (607x609, 514K)

pls make it extra sugar!!11jeez....

Yea, but then if we do it long enough, we eventually will become bf's, and I don't think I'm capable of loving a man. I just have a specific need. Consider it a transaction, if you will.

What's your problem bro
Too boring for a bf?

Attached: innocent_smile.jpg (369x387, 35K)