Welfare check

I lost my work ID and I might be getting fired soon,
I'm very much hating life.
I feel paranoid all the time, Get the feeling that everyone is hostile to me,
If someone is nice to me, I get really suspicious of their intent.
Maybe being a tinfoil hat wearing Jow Forumstard is my destiny.
I woke up feeling physically good this morning.
So that's a positive I suppose.

ill never be as blissfully ignorant as i once was

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Every day I have to force myself not to kms. It's not like I want to die my brain is fucked up and constantly says I'm worthless and need to end myself. Plus on top of that anxiety fucks with me so I don't want to go outside and bpd gives me extreme mood swings throughout the day. Honestly I just want to feel normal or as normal as I used to feel. Today has been extremely shitty cause I got ghosted by a second person this week. I feel broken.

Just thinking about my many many mistakes. I would have undoubtedly have been happier working with dead people, but instead I've chosen to be a cucked social care worker because of concerns for my own mental health. There's nothing wrong with liking dead bodies, and every day I want to punish society for making me feel like there is.

Reflection upon past mistakes is great for self development.
And jts never too late for a career change.

I've been through those sort of slumps user and the fact that you have the willpower to stop yourself says a great deal about yourself. You're alot stronger than i was, keep pushing through.

Also if you want a fren that wont ghost you add #8164 if you're a discordfag like me

I've already put myself in debt to do something else. I don't know, maybe I'm just being moody. I'm sure I could get a mortuary job with no experience, but when I was younger I really wanted to be a forensic scientist.

I'm addicted to nicotine now

I'm still a little bothered by a recent rejection. Time to cope by spending more time in my room alone as usual. Especially since my job gives me less hours too

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I have some pretty bad ADHD, it has fucked up my life and so has my anxiety, but i saw a doc recently and got a prescription for adderall, the dose isnt doing the effects its suppose to so i need to get a higher dose, and i need to talk with her more about my anxiety and what to do with that, overall im trying to make this year into the year that gets me on the correct path to good mental health and productivity

I still think about killing myself but im actively trying to change that by going to the doc and receiving help, i would suggest all robots do this

Then work yourself towards that over time, it doesn't have to be now or even 5 years just as long as you're doing what you thinks cool

It's really great that you're seeing a doctor, i did that myself and i was prescribed fluoxetine for my anxiety and im definitely feeling alot better 2 months in. It's also really good that you're trying to change your mental for the better as well. alot of us robots have trouble with that.

I wish you succes user.

Thank you user, i really wish you success as well, i believe in you. Ill have to look into fluoxetine as well.

I believe that if robots like us actually sought out help we'd all be a lot better off, i didnt want to get help because i didnt want to be looked at as weak, lazy or anything so i didnt go for years and years until finally i just had enough and at first i had anxiety about getting involved with my mental health so id push the doctors appointment until one day i realized i just had to rip it off like a bandaid and now i dont regret it, and im sure you dont either, if robots like us are getting better then im sure the rest of us can as well, good luck brother

I just get by on drugs and alcohol to fill the void for friends when Im not trying to make myself work. I used to care about being bad or looking terrible, but after all the bullshit Ive had to go through in the last year I feel more content to wallow in cynicism and mediocrity and allow myself to remain at the pathetically low standard we all have to look forward too

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For those i offered my discordfag tag to i sperged out and forget i have to include my name as well so here it is
Dema#8164

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You are the embodiment of whitepill user, i one day hope to be like you when i am of old age

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I'm actually sick for once

If you ever do, be better than me user. I believe in you.

I will try my very best my fren

>ignored me in the thread.
>probably going to ignore me in discord too.

And you are quite likely a tranny so no thanks I'll pass.

I apologise user as im still at work i try to reply to as many as i can

>quite likely a tranny
Negative

A gay dude then.
I hate discord, It reminds me of how isolated I am in the world.

>a gay dude then
Also negative fren

Look honestly you don't have to be alone and id be quite happy to have a conversation with you