I am a neet and i have just been summoned to jury duty. how can i get out of this or something

i am a neet and i have just been summoned to jury duty. how can i get out of this or something.

Attached: Untitled.jpg (899x580, 112K)

Jury duty is pretty comfy. Just show up with a book or something, stay around all day, they'll probably try to get you cut anyway. And then you'll get paid for doing so.

Just say you are prejudice against all races.

Attached: r7t8zk3bs1l01.jpg (517x402, 28K)

paid? what is the pay like?

If you're interviewed, talk about how you hate niggers kikes and faggots. They don't let racists into jury duty.

Attached: 8418C742-1046-43DF-9AA1-3B1B6F6F9FC0.jpg (720x710, 52K)

This doesn't do anything as the jury is a negotiable thing by lawyers.
Op tell they you know what jury nullification is and will inform your fellow jurors what it is. They will tell you to fuck off after that.

Tell them you don't need to see the evidence, you already know the defendant is guilty. Then gleefully inquire whether you will be allowed to watch when he recieves the death penalty. You'll be out of there very, very fast

do they call people with mental illnesses

It's shit. But you're literally getting paid to shit on your ass while administration gets it shit together, or waiting for rooms. Last time I went I was there for like 4 hours. Said about ten words. I didn't even get into the juror's box.
This is dumb. They know if you're being a shithead. Just act like an incel, say you're unemployed, etc. Chances are one of the teams wont want you on and you'll be removed.
>Op tell they you know what jury nullification is and will inform your fellow jurors what it is. They will tell you to fuck off after that.
Depends on the state. The state workers told us about it.

When I got called I just mean mugged the defendant the whole time and the defense lawyer kicked me out.

Unless you work or go to school enjoy actually earning money for a change rather than just being handed it

>They know if you're being a shithead.
That's the point, retard.

Claim that you have a disability. If that doesn't work, just bomb the interview.

what do they ask you. now that i heard you get paid i might consider doing it

I mean they'll see through it and put you on anyway. God, you're dumb.

Depends on the case. Generally, they'll ask you what you do for a living, and a few basic background questions. They'll ask you if you've heard about the case before, if your family works for the court/law enforcement, etc. They're mostly looking for conflicts of interest and to filter out legit insane people. Then the two legal teams might ask follow up questions if they feel that you might be an issue for them. Each side gets a few strikes to remove people. So for example, if it has to do with a drunk driver, and one of your family members was killed by a drunk driver, the defense team would probably try get you removed. Please don't be a retard and lie: it's perjury, which is a serious crime.

whats shit in numbers

State dependent. Just pick something close to bare minimum wage and you're probably right. Or google it.

Tell them you know what jury nullification is and that you'll tell the rest of the jury about it.

>faggots
I got jurry duty kast month and i was called into a room were my case was canceled because the defendant didn't bother to show up . As i was leaving the prosecutor was cursing and talking how he is going to indict her ass .

>summoned to jury duty
Just say opposite of what everyone else has decided. The decision needs to be unanimous.

I would just do it m8. Could be a nice change of pace and you will be a key part in deciding the fate of someone if you are into that.

yeah i wanna see what a court room is like

just say how much u got ffs fucking fuckfaggot

As a fellow NEET I would welcome the opportunity. It be fun to decide some normies fate

only if it's a Criminal Case. Civil, Juvenile, and Traffic just need a majority vote.

>no one here has been a fucking juror

>get my first jury duty at 19 while NEET
>go ride the lightrail down to the courthouse
>read for 3 hours in the room waiting to see if you get called
>get called up to a courtroom with a selection of other people, get asked questions about professions, age, and get told if you're going to purjor yourself anyway this is the time to make it known
>dumb liberal college students who think the system is bork/prejudice all get booted out
>im very young and loserish by contrast to other possible jurors and i kinda want on the seat, i know im on just to get a diverse jury
>couple middle age hispanic chicks, boomers, a young teacher and other normies
>case is fucking Assault and Kidnapping (one was first degree the other was third degree)
>defendant is 30ish y/o hispanic (now) single mom, prosecutor on behalf of the state but the guy was her EX and she met up with him with her current bf, and he beat him with an unloaded .22 pistol in her car as she drove off from where they met, gets traffic stopped by a cop and the ex runs out bloodied

>shit lasted 4 days, the middle age spic women perjured themselves anyway, wouldnt consider guilty whatsoever after the def brought her baby to the court one day. we cant talk to the def at all but everyone can see that shit and i know for a fact she did it to pull at heartstrings
>ended up dropping the assault charge because there was not evidence beyond a reasonable doubt that she was even complicit in the bf starting to bash his face in
>got to handle the gun and got paid $50 so whatever, the kidnapping charge will have to get fought on its own next month, which would be a harder battle
gay perjuring nigger

this was 3 years ago

If you get picked to serve on a jury it is pretty fun. I've done it twice. Once for some black guy that was speeding and contested his ticket. The second time was a civil case between an old jew and his longtime girlfriend. She was saying that even though they weren't married that there was a state of marriage between them. Lots of funny stuff got dragged up like love letters and stories of him being a typical jew. We ended up siding with the guy because she turned down two marriage proposals. I got like $100 out of it.

Nah you're the dumb one. They won't take a chance. I know this cause I saw some guy do it when I went to jury duty. He literally said he doesn't wanna be here and will just vote guilty.

Attached: 1549675217177.jpg (402x398, 38K)

This guy is right, even if they know youre doing it to be a shithead they wont take a chance to ruin their whole fucking case just by having you there.

Tell them that you woke up this morning and God told you he was guilty.

this. they give zero shits if you're just doing it to get out of it, theres a massive surplus of jurors at any given time so its not like they give a shit, besides, you think lawyers who see that shit day in day out dont know whats up?

This is something you cannot escape, but at least you can get comfy like in your pic.

Attached: smugwojak4v2.png (640x400, 32K)

You might not even have to go OP. I got summoned for jury duty once and when I called them on the date they told me to, they didn't even need me to come.

Say that you hate blacks or Mexicans or something, unironically. It usually works because they dont want a prejudiced jury.

>Please don't be a retard and lie: it's perjury, which is a serious crime.

Exactly, which is why you say: "I refuse to answer any questions, to eliminate any risk of my committing perjury." Either that, or: "I am unwilling to cooperate in any way, and I refuse to follow any instructions that are given to me."

>get told if you're going to purjor yourself anyway this is the time to make it known

In which case my response would be: "If I'm at risk of being prosecuted for perjury, then I demand a lawyer to represent me, and I refuse to say anything until my lawyer arrives. If you put me at legal risk, then I will take whatever steps I can to protect myself from you."

>and then they just toss you out of the court room because theres another guy who will be a willing juror in your place that wont cause problems

State yourself (not directly) as a biased jury in the selection. Originally of course

based anti roastie poster who also gets people out of tickets

Holy fucking shit. I thought they had standards lool.

during jury selection just say you hate the state and will make the jury hung no matter what evidence is presented

>and then they just toss you out of the court room
Which is exactly what I would want to happen.

Judges sometimes punish people who act racist on purpose to avoid duty. The easiest way is to lie about having a relative who's a police officer and when you're asked if you can judge the defendant fairly, say something like "I know (because of my relative) that if he wasn't guilty they wouldn't have arrested him".

literally just say "I DONT WANT TO BE HERE."

over and over until they tell you to leave.

You shouldn't have voted faggot.

why don't you actually give something back to your comminuty and do it?
you have literally nothing better to do and you being there save's a wagie or housewife the inconvenience

If serving on the jury will cause a burden of financial hardship you can be excused from a case. Just say you barely make enough to cover rent, your employer doesn't pay for jury duty, and you won't be able to afford rent. I've used this twice now

just mention jury nullification and they'll fuck you right off

just let out a loud RRRREEEEEEE and leave.

>how can i get out of this or something.
Why would you want to get out? I have been trying to get on jury duty every single year since I was 18-years old. To get to sit in an air conditioned room, downtown, judging people while my lunch was paid for? That is the life!

dude I wish I was called for jury duty.

I am a neet but I would fuck with the results.
Like if its some guy who is there for domestic violence. I would make sure I would vote not guilty.

Or if some roastie got "raped" by a guy after being at the bar. that guy would be found not guilty

Jury duty is where you literally play god. The only people who get out of it are the wagies that cant risk taking the time off of work.

Why get off jury duty? If I ever get summoned, some lucky motherfucker is going home. Lol. I dont care what they did. Murder. Rape. Robbery. Drugs. Even if there is overwhelming evidence I will still try and get them off. Fuck society, anybody who causes harm to it is considered an ally in my book.

Attached: 1535625167614.jpg (225x225, 6K)

Too bad majorities control everything

Jury duty is actually awesome and a one of a kind experience. Depending on the case it will either be boring or very interesting. I was on a jury regarding a mesothelioma case and it was so boring learing about all the different kinds of asbestos and how it affects you also the lawyers bought us lunch and i had something to do for a month and got paid 300. Then a few years later I was on a jury regarding a bail jumper that was pretty entertaining.Most recently i was on a jury regarding a gang killing but i chose to opt out cause of any retaliation from the gang.
Show up to jury duty and hear out the case. If it sounds intersting get on it but try not to be the foreman.

Exactly!!! My same thoughts. I fucking hate society, I hate the world and want it to burn. If I ever get summoned to jury duty, I will use my layman's knowledge of law and do everything in my power to make sure rapists, thieves, drug dealers, and even murderers stay out on the street. Glad to see I'm not the only one. Fuck humanity. Anybody who contributes to its destruction is a friend to me.

Attached: richard-ramirez-quotes_grande.jpg (600x300, 29K)

Do what I did accidentally when I was literally first seat--when the prosecutor is talking, act really interested and answer his questions, then start nodding off a bit when the defense attorney introduces himself.

Just tell the judge you have an eye for guilty people and you can tell who's guilty or innocent. Worked for my alcoholic dad should work for you.

jury nullification doesn't fly, worse thing you can possibly do is hand the jury and get the defendant another trial, meanwhile you'll probably arrested for contempt.

That's not how contempt of court works. It's only reserved for jurors who do things like disrespect the judge or make a scene in court. Unless you reveal your ulterior motives to get criminals off the hook, you are granted legal impunity by the law. A juror legally cannot make a "wrong" decision, so as a logical consequence, you cannot be punished for supporting a defendant, regardless of the evidence.

So yeah, if I get picked, like I said before some lucky murderer or rapist is going home. I studied a bit of law and feel I could help sway at least a few other jurors to vote not guilty.

Attached: 347641037.jpg (600x315, 35K)

still even if you steadfastly refuse to vote guilty you cannot convince the others to do so. Best thing you could hope for would be to hang the jury, delaying the process but not derailing it.

It's called "Jury Deliberation", where you can discuss evidence and try to agree on a unanimous verdict. That's where I can shine. After the evidence is presented, I'll do my best with my limited knowledge of law to claim the evidence is not credible, and try to convince other jurors to vote not guilty. That's not illegal, unless you make your malicious intentions known. And yes, it has happened before. It's where the whole concept of "jury nullification" came from. When the jury does not care for a particular law or they in some way support the defendant, and vote not guilty regardless of evidence.

I'm pretty confident that refusing to participate in jury duty is also illegal.

>Well, you *could* punish me, but..

if someone's convinced whatsoever they're guilty, you're just creating a hung jury. case gets rescheduled later.
being a rogue juror is a dickhead move, anyway.

Being a dickhead is the whole point for me. Like I said before. I hate the world and want to see it burn. Anyone who inflicts pain and suffering on society is a classy fellow in my book. Just as society has fucked me over.

Attached: 1519210150827.png (720x599, 375K)

Go and do "not guilty" trolling.
Just keep saying they are not guilty.

Everyone will be really butthurt and they can't do shit.

>hates society
>perverts justice for a single instance of a single individual

Even if you want to deliberately ruin the justice system just to be an edgelord, your attempt will by itself is insignificant and maligned. If you were high IQ you'd learn to build bombs or something

What happens if you don't show up and just trash the physical summons?
What happens if you just trash the other threatening letter too?
They can't really prove you got either so what then, are they gonna try something else or try to charge you for something at a later date?

You get police at your house and then problems

Dont mention jury nullification you'll be put in jail.

You CAN'T be punished for "wrong decisions" as jury.
You can say whatever the fuck you want for whatever reason you want.

they literally tell you on the summons youll get assraped in jail and get a huge fine

Yeah, not going to incriminate or doxx myself but I already fuck society over in equally dickish ways from the power my profession gives me. No, I will not elaborate further. I'll leave that whole "serial killing" stuff to the professionals, and just watch with amusement, admiring thier work.

Attached: f00a946a4d67818100288750e7cde404.jpg (850x400, 49K)

>No, I will not elaborate further
Nobody cares faggot. People like you are the worst, edgy, nihilistic, and with a wicked sense of humor, but really just the sign of a person with no meaning in life

Basically. I'm just a psychopath with some self restraint who cheerfully ruins peoples lives through a white-collar profession rather than killing people. It's so much fun watching people break down in tears or seeth with anger as I reclaim thier homes and property they couldn't afford. You pretty much have to be a psychopath to do what I do, and oh boy is it great. Makes me good money to. I get paid to enforce legal state sanctioned robbery, basically.

Attached: 7ed2b710a7c3e15064fd7ad21ea45b97.jpg (441x700, 37K)