Fembot feels

>nacho uppercut
Oh, it is you again.

Fuck off with your fake roastoid stories

reads like some #relateable shite where woman pretend to be awkward and cute

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who is she? I want to hold her hand

whats the hobby fellow fembot?

Another spider that may live near you is the wood lice spider. These live in my garage and they are certainly mischievous lads munching and crunching about.

>highschool
>friends with a guy
>have a crush on him
>ask him out
>"I have a girlfriend."
>obviously lying
>autism.exe
>"Well, if you didn't, would you go out with me?"
>"No."
I'm starting to wonder about the infinitely high girlfriend factor.

Hey, what's up? Are you the user that keeps recognizing me in every thread I post in these days? If not, sheesh, join the club.

I know who you're talking about and I can assure you, my good sir, I hate them as well.
>"tee hee I have anxiety which I post about on Facebook because I felt nervous giving a presentation about otherkin representation at a local academic conference"
>"I have depression and when I do I just like to do silly things like take baths and pet my kitty cat."

>meanwhile I have to stare at a timer on my phone and focus on my breathing every time the subway stalls
>piss jugs in my room because my roommate has friends over

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Don't do any feminist shit, you should be killed for that

>Chad doesn't ask me out ;_;
>My bf is not a chad uwu
>I saw two Chads today OwO

there, saved you 100 posts.

How do I be a good friend to spiders? I like them a lot and they help with insects.

Jokes on you, I pray to a photo of Andrea Dworkin I keep in my wallet.

You forgot the part where Chad pile drives me and then doesn't text back. :(

>hanging out with a guy that I like
>he leans in close to me
>oh fuck
>oh fuck is this happening
>"Hey user, can I ask you something?"
>"Y-yeah?"
>"It's a bit crazy but I've been thinking about this for a long time..."
>"What is it?"
>"You wanna fist fight?"
>"What?"
>"You wanna fist fight? You seem like you'd be fun to fight."

I'm no expert, but:
>don't touch them
>leave them alone
>don't capture them just to place them outside, they're in your house for a reason
>and that reason is that they're keeping it clean
If you don't want a spider in a specific spot (like over your bed) move it to the basement rather than throwing it outside.

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>>meanwhile I have to stare at a timer on my phone and focus on my breathing every time the subway stalls
>>piss jugs in my room because my roommate has friends over
k well you clearly have some serious anxiety if that's true. but even still other guy was right, fems can't be robots. especially not in the long run

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How old are you? Are u white? I'd be ur Chad bf desu

>wood lice
You mean woodlouce, you retarded foid?
Anyway, I'm enjoying your greentexts. You seem like you would be an interesting person to talk to.

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>anxiety
I ain't done yet.

>spin in circles every day for a couple of hours to calm down
>instead of actually sleeping I set twenty minute timers so I can stay awake and daydream about worldbuilding and 2D boyfriends for hours
>have actually sabotaged my career and academic prospects because I've been too nervous to confront an abusive coworker, or ask for leave when a relative died, etc.
>have intense recurring intrusive thoughts about dying, having a brain tumor ever since my best friend in highschool died of one
>often stop feeling "real"
>like I'm in a video game
>like the stuff in front of me is through a window but it's not
>like I'm going to pass out but I'm not
>no one thinks I'm anxious / shy because I'm really loud and tomboyish
>even my Chad brother who thinks (((therapy))) is a bad meme tells me that I deserve and need mental health assessment
And yet I refuse to get it. Meanwhile I know people that get two week extensions on school projects because their rich parents got them a BPD diagnosis in grade 10 and their boyfriends broke up with them whereas I refuse to see a therapist because I'm not a pussy faggot who needs meds. I'm a stronk independent woman.

>fems can't be robots
I mean, I actually agree in a very specific way. I have complicated thoughts and ideas about robotness. They should give me a Ph.D in incel studies. If you want to talk about it, I'd be delighted.

>be me
>meet guy online by selling and buying vintage records
>develop a huge crush on him
>ask him if he wants to hang out but he "I only response to business inquiries".
>he uses the same username for everything
>use that to find all of his accounts on every website
>he's a dirty fucking Redditor
>find his name, work, family history, dating website account, etc.
>make a perfect profile for myself highlighting everything we have in common
>he sees it
>asks me out
>we go on one date
>it's awkward as fuck
>I lean in for a kiss
>he swerves out of the way

>FAKE SPIDER GIRL DESTROYED AND BLOWN THE FUCK OUT WITH FACTS AND LOGIC
I'm literally shaking right now.

Thanks user, I'm happy people find them funny. I got work for a bit, but hopefully I can keep shitposting later.

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Well imagine how horrible it feels to be q guy with those characteristics. All I have is anxiety, but every girl I tell this to fucks off. You can be a complete nut job and still get a date. You aren't a """fembot""", fuck off to /soc/ or some other normie board.

>I mean, I actually agree in a very specific way. I have complicated thoughts and ideas about robotness. They should give me a Ph.D in incel studies. If you want to talk about it, I'd be delighted.
This kind of shit has always interested me.

Dude, do you know how many times I've seen men get girlfriends with the anxiety depression pity party shit?
>willing to actually discuss this issue in a polite fashion
>even concede a point
>you act like a dick about it

Ever consider that's why you're single? Because when you meet a woman in similar circumstances who might even agree that your situation is worse you tell her to fuck off?

And chances are your "anxiety" is tantamount to "My hands get sweaty and I have to rehearse my order beforehand", you stupid fag.

This is really cute, t. moid

>posting shittier spiders when you can post tarantulas

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That's the first time I replied to you, but anyway, I've got real fucking diagnosed anxiety. I've got GAD and severe social anxiety. I don't even leave my fucking house anymore. Not to mention I have IBS that gets triggered by the stress my anxiety causes, which means 9/10 times I try to leave the house I have to take Imodium and suffer later or be quick and hope I don't shit myself. I had to get really drunk just to get the courage to call my old boss and tell him I didn't get my W2. Most days I lay in bed for hours reliving every little mistake I've ever made, or stressing about something I have to get done. Every day is hell to me, and it only gets worse every day. If this isn't fucking anxiety, I'm not sure what is.

>If you want to talk about it, I'd be delighted.
alright fine, go. what's your famed take on robotness?

>oh shit this is a fuck off signal
Not really. Men don't communicate non verbally. If we want you to fuck off, we will mouth the words "fuck off". He could have just wanted to look something up.

Well, in that case, I'm sorry I snapped at you.

>tarantulas
Oh wow, I'm so fucking impressed by an incredibly basal group of spiders that lack many of the great and interesting innovations that have since made spiders iconic. Get fucked, pleb, and take your entry level arthropods with you. Me and pic related are going to go fuck your oneitis.

When I agreed with that other user, I meant that women can't be robots because "robothood" is a very specifically male phenomenon. One of the core aspects of robothood is the perspectives that they have on women, and that cannot be simulated by an individual reflecting upon themselves. Plus, I would argue that robots vs. fembots develop in very different ways. See the abundance of robots with single mothers.

Be interested in hearing other takes, though.

>ask a guy out
>go on date
>text him for awhile
>ask him to go to a horror movie screening
>he sends me a seven paragraph apology for not liking me
>then sends me another twenty paragraph post about his opinions on Brexit or some political shit and how depressed he is and how he's dropping out of school
>lol you just rejected me and you think I care about your thoughts and mental health
>never talk to him again
>go to horror screening alone

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>robothood" is a very specifically male phenomenon.
simplified, but yeah. from where i'm standing it always goes back to simple biology that men are less valuable in straight dating markets than woman. all about making an impression on the lady, and thus bottom feeders fall through nets. end up on image boards, sub reddits, forums etc. fems such as yourself are more outliers in your gender while fuck ton of lonely men create robot cultures such as this.
>See the abundance of robots with single mother
haven't seen much about this but i've haven't seen any trends regarding no father figures. i got a proper english, walking class bloke dad and yet was always shy skinny kid. i'm not sure about this correlation. there are tons of posts about how embarrassed their dads are of them.

You know you were really kinda to start like a girl that would be interesting to talk and hang out with but then
>Piss jugs
That shit is nasty af and you need to learn to be hygenic before even attempting to getting a bf.
Nasty ass mofo.

>since they're the real feminist icons
Why don't you just flirt with women instead? You'll probably have more luck that way.

You ruined Vice for me.

The things that cause males to be robots (shyness, awkwardness) aren't as much of a detriment to women as they are to men. Hence the imbalance.

>cooking, open door to vent because studio apartment
>ground floor, community center outside door with grills and seating
>leaning against wall near stove tending chickuns while playing on phone
>look up, guy outside
>realize my hoodie is long enough that it covers my miniskirt like Rikka, looks like i'm not wearing bottoms
>eyes meet
>max awkward
I can't even cook chickun in peace. Why can't men fuck off from looking at me?

She can date a dude who has piss jugs too kek

Even though it would be dumb since she could stop and find a bf who's not a fat, basement dwelling neckbeard...

Why not? Originol

My penis would get in the way.

>fuck your oneitis.
Fuck you spiderchad.

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Look, judging by your posts you are clearly a desirable female, but your behavior and mannerisms scare men away.

If you were to adjust and correct these problems you would be completely fine. You are in a position to change everything simply by consulting a therapist. It may be as easy as taking a pill each day that mutes your autistic tendencies.

The way I see it, your plight is not justified, nor is it permanent.

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Nah, she's probably ugly. A lot of these stories sound like the guy is immediately disinterested and she just makes it worse.

Even if one accepts anisogamy affects human social interaction, robots still grossly underestimate male sexual marketplace value and are generally blind to advantages they have in said market due to living in the West and (usually) being white and middle-class, for instance.

>trends no father figures
I see tons of "muh single mother" threads.

>proper English bloke
I find this delightful.

>embarrassed their dads are
I think that's a general male neurosis. Even the Chads I know speak of feeling emasculated by their fathers.

>bitching about piss jugs
Reeee, normie, etc.

No, get cucked.
>tfw social spiders have more friends than you

>desireable
You overestimate me.

>scare men
You accurately assess me.

>take a pill
>implying I would ever take the medicinal Jew.
Truly bluepilled and not at all kvlt.

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How do girls use piss jugs?

>Normie
Yeah so what? Doesn't wmake what I said not true. You nasty af and the guys sense this in you. Clean yourself.

>all these failed attempts at being an obnoxious manic pixie dreamgirl

Kek

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>be me
>go to party after work
>start talking to a guy
>he's not at all my type but his personality is really cool
>he starts talking about flirt stuff, sex
>uncomfortable at first but start to crush on him
>we walk home together
>hug
>later ask him if he wants to hang out
>he says no, he's busy
>ask to listen to his violin playing
>he says no, something about not having girls at home near his religious mother
>ask when he isn't busy
>"Oh I have a lot of homework"
>"Oh okay"
>go out on my bike to get groceries
>see him getting ice cream with his friends
>sees me
>he sheepishly waves
>go home
>whatever
>give up on him as a romantic prospect, just be polite at work, take the hint
>two months later
>there's another after-work party at his house
>no girls over, eh?
>I don't get an invite but every single other co-worker does

>one of my coworkers is a complete fucking autistic retard
>worse than me
>he basically stalks this one girl by asking her out every single day
>when she says no he just tells her she'll change her mind eventually despite the fact he's a cowboy-hat wearing Trump supporter and she's a perpetually triggered aposematic SJW
>he blares Kiss in the lab every day
>he tortures the research animals and makes his crush so upset she cries
>he tells me about my lack of an invite
>loudly says, "Yeah user, he didn't invite you. Says you make him uncomfortable. I get what he's saying, you are pretty tactless."
>proceeds to tell SJW crush that she would be so much prettier if she shaved her legs
igetitnow.jpg
iminhell.jpg

It's more of a piss trough, dear user.

>normies
>ever knowing what is true

Do you like the Shins?

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>It's more of a piss trough
Pics?

Okay fuck you you had me with this thread until narcho farts

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Dont fault others for your lack of inner insight. Clean yourself and you'll find more comes to you.
Also, you are trying to get a bf, you are a normie sis. Might as well get used to it.

>work in a lab
>legs aren't fully covered
What kind of shit standards do you have there?

>piss trough
That is VILE. I can't get a gf as a very hygienic male, but this disgusting pig can get dates. There is no god.

What is your opinion on ants? I'm very fond of them and I'm curious if your interests extend to insects or if they're limited to eight legged freaks

Tfw no loud and tomboyish GF

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Stop bullying my girlfriend. The pissjugs just make her better.

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Your gf a shit and nasty af. And a fatass too

I prefer to use interpretative dance.

Oh that's not even the worst of it. One time I got really drunk and listened to the Smiths' The Queen is Dead. I attempted to fart to the beat of "Frankly, Mr. Shankly".

>normies
>talking about insight

>be me
>at work
>faint
>guy I like catches me
>oh wow this is like one of my favourite gothic novels I am literally Catherine Earnshaw
>turns out I'm actually having a seizure
>go full blown twitching and seizing
>he literally abandoned me in the store room
>wake up covered in blood because I hit my head
>feel irrationally angry because my brain just blue screen'ed
>yell at nice SJW coworker who was trying to help me
>calm down
>she drives me to the hospital
>"Yeah he said you were being weird again and I wasn't sure what he meant."

This was after work. Although yeah, this lab had absolutely egregious health violations and I regret not fucking going for their throats over it when I had the chance.

>very hygienic
Oooh, you sound cute. I like the idea of making you eat my yeast infection. I like femdom, btw. Come on baby, you're a volcel if you don't.

>eight legged freaks
I actually breathed really hard out of my nose when I read that.

>insects
Love 'em. Although if we're veering into the wonderful world of Hymenoptera, I'm more of a "parasitic-wasps-causing-Darwin-to-lose-faith-in-God" kind of gal.

Ants are crazy though. Shit like pic related fucks my life up. I can't even imagine what having a true eusocial society would be like. Can you imagine a giant woman with massive teeth glaring at you while you do data entry or weld or sweep streets?

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>Can you imagine a giant woman with massive teeth glaring at you while you do data entry or weld or sweep streets?

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>Somehow manage to weird someone out they think you're being weird when you're havign a fucking SEIZURE
Jesus H Christ on a crutch what the fuck do you do, not related to your failures at courting a man, in your day to day life?

>advantages they have in said market due to living in the West
how is that an advantage in western dating pools? Everyone in western countries lives in the west. Do you think western men should go to non western countries to get poor girls or something? Cause that's pretty pathetic.
> being white and middle-class
eh being a certain race or you mum or dad having money doesn't stop you from being a total bell. most people go for own type anyway yet fail and a fuck load here are asian or mixed. Also goes without saying that your parents money obviously isn't your success and has nothing to do with you. plus your folks would have to have a fuck load of moolah to get pure golddiggers coming at you.
>Even the Chads I know speak of feeling emasculated by their fathers
they probably have shit dads then. i didn't say emasculate, i said embarrassed cause of how (frankly) disappointing their boys are wasting their lives away.

the advantage i'd say all men have is they can drastically change how society views them and general attention they get from woman by putting in the work and getting Jow Forums.if you're a normal fit woman there is much you can do it this regard besides maybe some type of surgery.

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You are not a robot, you r a freak. Kys.

The way you see her is the way women see you. Isn't it funny to know that you're on par with such an unwieldy beast?

On one hand I really want to fucking know what you look like to scare people away this hard, on the other I don't want anything to do with this
fuck it morbid curiosity time, add me on discord gggeeee#1702

Oh please,don't compare me to trash like this. I may not have luck with women but at least I'm hygenic and take care of myself.

You don't have luck with women because you disgust them in the same way this woman disgusts you. No one cares how prim and proper you are.

Lol couldn't be more wrong bucko

Then why is she getting occasional dates while you sit at home all alone? Considering this, you're actually beneath her. You should have just accepted being on par with her before I realized you were even lower.

Lol, other user is not me.
And because I would just feel too embarrassed and insecure. It's no wonder I don't read character x reader fanfic.

You assume to much. I've got plenty of dates but I'm terrible at picking good women

Good women are not a choice you can make. You're stuck with women like OP and you resent her for it, despite it being due to your own short comings.

So are you saying that it would actually be better if a guy raped you because then you wouldn't have to feel embarrassed and insecure? As it's so obvious he's attracted to your body to such a degree that he's willing to harm you in order to get a chance to be intimate with you.

>spider
>feminist icons
what the fuck are you talking about, it's like we're not even speaking the same language
also, you're a dumbass, ask him for his number or something

You are trying to hard to sound smart and not fooling anyone

>like a guy
>tells me I'm like a brother to him
>"Don't you mean sister?"
>"Nah, you give off a pretty mannish vibe."
>"..."
>"It's a compliment, sisters are annoying."

Ants are not for lewd, back to /d/.

I found out later he was actually calling for help. I also found out that unless you get in the ambulance you don't have to pay. So if you ever feel like spiting the government, just get a bunch of ambulances. Or rack up student debt and pull a Rodger.

>what the fuck do you do
Mostly listen to music, draw bugs, dress like a lumberjack, watch horror movies, read gothic lit, compulsively type out morse code on my hands/objects, and crack unfunny jokes that nobody else appreciates.

>go to protest with a cardboard sign that says, " Teach African refugees to program Javascript"
>friend gets mad at me because I'm making the protest look less serious

>non-Western countries
youtube.com/watch?v=BRzksOxgW3Y

>most people go for their own types
Except Asian bitches.

>your parents' money isn't yours
I don't think chicks care so long as they're fed.

>golddiggers need lots of money
Patently false. Friend of mine works in a kitchen and he's had a series of leeches.

>shit dads
Nah, moreso that my chad friends have crazy cool dads who make them feel like beta by comparison. And I know what you meant, dude, I'm just saying that this isn't unique to betas.

>look like
Been told I look like a female version of either Dylan Klebold or Jay from Clerks. Feel I'm more of a Randall, honestly.

>man
>doesn't have sexy calloused hands
Sad!

In all seriousness, come on bb, hit me up. I wanna pour some sugar on you. I want you do fuck me every day of the month. Volcel if you won't.

>reader x character
Um, what did I ever do to you that warrants this personal attack?

>he doesn't get why spiders are feminine symbols
lern2jung
I bet you think Sarlaac pits are just Sarlaac pits.

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I'm not trying to sound smart at all. It's obvious you're here because you're a loser just like everyone else.

>make eye contact with the same guy twice
>second time it looks like he's kind of trying to smile
>suspect he might have found me attractive
>imagine our life together for 2.5 seconds before realizing i'd never be his first choice, he'd still watch porn and worship instagram goddesses, he'd hate me for not staying young forever, he'd close his eyes and think about jailbait teens while sleeping with me and imagine a whole soap opera scene where tells me he's in love with someone else, someone hotter, me sobbing hysterically and ending up having to kill myself because my heart is so shattered

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>if you ever feel like spiting the government, just get a bunch of ambulances
Ambulance services are provided by private companies, you cunt.

I could see how those activities could be weird to normies, nothing really out there tho.
>Dylanklobold/jay mix
Hot desu break my fucking nose.
I've been told I look like a combination of a retarded adam sandler and that one big shark from shark tale

You are just too interesting, OP. I think most men prefer quiet, boring women.

k so losers here are actually advantaged cause of a bunch racial stereotypes. retard tier conversation.

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My hands are calloused and wtf is a volcel?
Learn to be hygenic and you might be worth my time. You got a interesting view of things but you just too nasty.

>go to a academic conference
>one of the speakers says something to the effect of eye contact making people like each other more
>like if you look into someone's eyes it is conducive to pair bonding
>see a guy I like
>keep trying to aggressively make eye contact to biohack this nigga
>"user, are you deliberately trying to release serotonin in my brain my staring at me?"
>Just laugh while he walks away

A-are you me?

Whenever I fall in love with men on the subway or strike up a conversation with an interesting man in the park, I always imagine this Jane Austen quote:
>"A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment."
Because she has me pegged.

>fearing that you're never going to be his first choice
Oh geez, you're cutting to the core of me here.

Honestly user I just want to spite people. That's why I'm a big believer in subway suicides.

>nothing really out there
Yeah, I don't fancy myself strange.

>retarded adam sandler
>shark from Shark Tale
I'm laughing out loud (I typed it so you know it's true), God, I can visualize it. Alas, user, my brother is a muscular version of Adam Sandler and kissing you would be too strange for me. I must reject your hand.

I'm very tempted to think that, but I deliberately avoid such thoughts since they're on par with "I'm just too smart to do well in school".

Uh, yeah. Ever read OKCupid stats?
>"if you're reading OKCupid stats it's over for you"
>Oh, Eggy, why hath thou forsaken me

>he doesn't know what a volcel is

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My therapist looks like pic related. She makes me want to die.

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>Oh God shes a bug nerd
Let me guess, minus being scared of spiders previously, did you kinda sit alone and just look at the bugs when you were little? I remember this ant hive in a tree I'd sit near and watch when I was in grade three since I only had two friends that looked up to me since they were too slow to realize I was a loser.

diff user but whats a volcel?

>basis actual life possibilities on statistics from some shitty yank dating app
yeah i take it all back. you're definitely a robot.

L2shower and be hygenic you nasty ass mofo

>>lol you just rejected me and you think I care about your thoughts and mental health
>>never talk to him again
>>go to horror screening alone

You are a queen. A queen

>hanging out with friends
>one of my female friends is drunk
>"You know user, if you were a man, I'd date you."
>"Hm?"
>"Yeah, you're confident, you're loud, you're tall, you're funny, you make decent money, you're good with kids. If you were a guy I'd date you."
>all my female friends agree that I'd be a super chad if I had a dick
>male friends pipe up
>"Yeah like you'd be the type of guy girls flock to."
>"Well, what about as a girl? Am I dateable as a girl?"
>table goes quiet
>male friend I had a crush on once finishes eating chicken wing
>"You're cool."
>proceeds to talk at his incredibly boring date who sat the entire time looking at her phone while everyone else had fun

>the only people that can be mental health professionals are pretty, successful, likely rich people
Disgusting. And part of the reason why I ain't never been to one of them mental health services.

A person who is voluntarily celibate. They are differentiated from incels, who have no say in whether they get laid or not.

>he actually thinks I mean the things I say

The other day I was trimming my bush and I wanted to collect the pubes into a ball so I placed them on a plate of food I was eating in the bathtub because I live that Gummo life. Anyway, I realized after I trimmed that I wanted the remaining perogies since they were homemade and I spent a lot of time on them. Long story short I got pubes in my mouth from the half-dried sour cream but it was worth it.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS

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>Reject your hand
Forsooth mlady! I must beg that you reconsider thine rash feelings, I wish not for marriage as we have only just met!
(hehe all according to kekeiku)

Um, isn't the point of rape kind of that you can't say no?
I mean, maybe it would be better because I wouldn't feel like I was taking advantage of him... but it would still probably embarrass him later.

Reader x character is based, I just can't really read it (unless I'm picturing myself as someone else) because all I can think is that there's no way that character would ever actually want to fuck me.

>t.shitposter

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Why are you like this user. You would clearly be an 8 if you took care of yourself. How can you expect others to care when you don't even give a shit about yourself?

I'm crushing on a 60 year old. Where did it all go so wrong?

>Tfw hygiene faggot won't realize you're fucking with him and app out

Sir, do not pretend you are not infatuated with myself! I own huge tracts of land and have the muscle definition of a baby in a Renaissance painting. Cease these puerile attempts at """"negging"""" me. I care not for your stylish properties or eloquent greentexts, I would much rather knit for orphans for the rest of my life in the confines of my brother's home than be your wife!

>based
>can't imagine
Honestly, same. Plus writing in the second person is usually unbearably awkward. Especially when they would never do things the way I would.

>me
>being good at sex
>not cracking a fucking joke about bestiality or rape or the Holocaust halfway through and making finger guns at the person then queefing

This creates a tremendous dilemma. If there are strong, well-written female characters, then they'll have too much personality to write slash fic with. I can't allow mainstream media to move past generic female protagonists I can project onto.

>look at bugs
I used to keep worms in my pockets and spend hours oggling them. I also used to collect crawfish back when I lived in the South. I also stole my brother's feeding crickets and stashed them in my room because I wanted to save them.

This other time I used my vibrator during my period, and it got a bunch of blood caked on. I ignored it and used it again a few days later even though it wasn't clean.

He needs a little spice in his life. And my spice, I mean, "dried warty foot calluses peeled off with an box cutter at work".

When you're dad left? The oldest I ever fancied was 30-40. I never got the older men thing, I actually prefer younger males to feed upon

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