/britfeel/

Rickets girl just left my place.
She didn't put out. Blue balled me like fuck.

Gonna finish with her before Tuesday because she said she wants to take me out for dinner. Nah you cunt.

This lass told me to listen to Sunbather by Deafhaven. I always thought it was /mu/core meme music but it's actually bretty good. I usually only listen to hiphop

Arw, I didn't know they were like that, sounds cute as. How long do they take to tame?

>worked with a bloke whose kids had hamsters
>curtain in his house dividing his sitting room and dining room
>on a cold winter night he brought them in from the dining room so they could share the warms in the sitting room
>Put the cage in the corner, hamsters are happy
>he goes to bed
>in the morning discovers they'd pulled the curtain into their cage during the night
>massive hole in it where they'd chewed it into bedding
oops.jpg

The amount of time and money I spend on wrestling is both impressive and lame
>I don't know if i have simply grown out of it or its genuinely went shit.
probably both. It is a ridiculous business and it's pretty shit these days

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watched WWE for the first time recently with some mates. rating the women out of 10 was the best part

i liked having a scottish friend, it was a fun experience lads through it i discovered many slang, britfeel and shit

now i'm friendless, i m a real robot am i not ?

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Why haven't you asked her about her deformities?
If she wants to take you out to dinner let her, order wagu steak or lobster. Free food always tastes better.

no and you should be banned by now
you're the opposite of a robot and will never be one you attention whoring motherfucker. You are on a level below the trannies that are in the threads

>It is a ridiculous business and it's pretty shit these days
Tbf i was watching some of the early 2000s stuff a little while ago and i was thoroughly enjoying it but the streams starting fucking me about so i fucked it off.
reckon i could properly follow the modern stuff if it was decent. I can't stand that its pg

My watch is ending
Off to bed
Goodnight sweetheart

Watch Sumo, it's better, faster and more athletic (ironically because it is fat blokes). You'll find it on NHK on your sky/virgin box where the current basho ends this weekend.

(Sue Perkins unrelated)

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It ain't free because I've already spent over 100 pounds on dates with her.
May as well have had an escort come over.

Kek I used to have a hamster when I was a kid and she chewed all through my mums jeans in her wardrobe when she escaped one night the mad cunt. Rodents chew fucking everything because they're teeth are always growing so they need to wear em down. And they take a couple weeks to tame if they're babies and you hold them every day. Adults can be whenever, can take years or they'll even never be okay being held by humans

Well done lad, that must have been hard. I believe people can grieve properly once the funeral is over, it's so tense making all the arrangements beforehand.

Is it your Polish meal at 2pm tomorrow? Don't bale lad, go for it.

Want to play Scrabble tomorrow?

Posted in the old thread like a mong

>Going on a date with a lass with the same last name as me
Is this incest lads? It's quite an obscure Scottish name but we're from two very different parts of England

Even the score then, make her spend a hundred on you because you want a starter, main and dessert.
Find out about her rickets before you ditch her though ffs. user really wants to know what's the matter with her.

Count me in mate.

I'd skip the meet if you feel you're not ready to be social yet, but it might help you get your mind off it

>Polish meal
no just a bunch of geeks in a pub.
meetup.com/OverBoardLondon/events/lqrnqqyzfbfc/

I knew a girl in college who had an indoor rabbit and the fucker was always chewing through her computer cables, I was surprised it wasn't electrocuted.
Is that all, a couple of weeks? I understand that about the adults, for instance if a kitten has no human interaction for the first 14 weeks it will be feral for life. Baby gerbils must be so smol.

It might be a mild form of dwarfism.

No of course it isn't.
Incest is between first degree relatives.

Didn't you post your calendar and a Polish meal was one of them? Now I think of it I believe it was a mid week thing.
I remember you trying to decide between tomorrow's 2pm and 6pm one, I suggested you go to both because they start at different times. What have you got to lose by going?

Didn't know that about kittens lad, that's pretty neat. And yeah I wanted to get chinchillas but you have to let them out each day for an hour or two to run around, my room isn't big enough and there's a shit ton of cables they can chew. Gerbils I can atleast get a playpen to keep them in when I let them out. And yeah they're tiny fuckers. If I do get them from that shop he says they'll be babies so I'll have to tame them myself

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Wow yeah, they're always bandy legged, aren't they? Have you seen how short her parents and siblings are?

Yeah Polish meal was Tuesday but I think I've gotten all my dates mixed up because I thought it clasged with a speed-friending thing

>Why yes, I do eat 8 shredded wheat a day

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Her brother is normal but if both her parents are carriers then she could be affected. Haven't seen them.

Looks like Chip Hazard from Small Soldiers

>go in the garden for smoke
>step-dad standing at the bottom of the garden in complete darkness in t-shirt and shorts just staring at the sky
the fuck

howling lad he's going to murder your family in your sleep i reckon

lads this is really weird I'm trying to plan journey on TFL but it's not listing any tube/train routs at all just buses. And yes before anyone asks I'm changing the journey time for midday

Have you tried ojp?
ojp.nationalrail.co.uk/service/planjourney/search

Think your step dad might be an alien mate attempting to get back too the mothership

Every lass I've spoke to says they hate muscly lads and prefer 'dadbods' whatever the fuck that is, what the fuck does that even mean

Ah nice one mate working perfect

*posts a sexist reply that somehow makes women looks like cunts even when they dont have ridiculous standards*

Think its because its better to sleep with someone who has more fat on them maybe or they wanna be with someone whos not a fitness freak

Women love food lad, you not got any lasses on instagram? Always posting their meals and takeaways and shite. Someone who /lifts/ isn't interested in that shite

>30 people going to the meet 2moro
>only 6 are female
they're going to get fucking swarmed by the nerds

Nah he's just drunk and based

Is it a sign a girl likes me if she keeps on calling me intelligent? She's never complimented my appearance or anything but she always calls me smart.

I mean, it's a sign she thinks you're smart. That could be a positive or a negative intelligent people can come across as arrogant

Listening to a bit of Julia Holter. Never listened to her before but she's pretty fucking comfy

she's talking to you, that's a good sign

Going to see a Leonardo da Vinci art exhibition in the morning so I'm having an early night.

Nighty night lids.

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That picture is very cute, I bet if you hold them like that they'll get used to the smell of you first. It sounds sensible to keep them contained, just in case. I've never seen a gerbil playpen, I bet the mesh has to be super fine so they don't get through it I love playful animals.

Why is this britfeel sooo fucking gay

Did you go to any of them? The speed friending sounded quite promising.

Does she talk about it?

Yeah lid, the first few days you get them you just leave your hand in the tank for a bit and they'll get used to your scent and eventually climb onto your hand themselves, got to do it slowly with them so they don't get spooked.

Havent been to any yet only joined last week but 'planning' on attending at least a couple a week. Might end up giving up on the idea entirely since
>I'm a bit mental and change my mind all the time
>I look like shit with messy hair and heavy dark bags under my eyes
>I have loads of self-harm scars which can weird people out

Yeah but I mean nerds are considered smart yet don't do well when dating. I pretty much am a nerd so i'm going to assume it's negative.

I've done 3/5ths of my Lidl vodka whilst trying to goad some bitches into a conversation on various dating apps tonight. Should I finish the 50 cl bottle?

Yeah I've known some lads who are thick as shit who get gfs. Unless you're in some middle class Guardian lonely hearts group intelligence isnt top of women's list

We kind of have to talk to each other because we're in the same group for uni groupwork.

>Lidl vodka
sounds utter repulsive tbqh

Like all baby animals then, gentleness is the key. When are you decorating your room?

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They might be too. Brush your hair, clean your teeth, put cucumber slices on your eyes for 10 minutes. Wear things that covers your scars. You can do it.

I'm really happy. I'm going to ask the girl I like out on a date soon.

>put cucumber slices on your eyes for 10 minutes
does that shit actually work?

Everything should be here around mid-April. Waiting on the flooring and furniture at the minute. Then the pet shop takes about 3 weeks to get them from the breeder, might do that a week or so before I start decorating so it's not such a long wait till I get them. Hopefully have them in a month or so

Its not the worst. That honour goes to Aldi.

How do I convince this beautiful polish girl at work who I barely speak with to cheat on her boyfriend with me, He's just a run of the mill ugly slav whereas I actually have something going for me. I'm crushing hard and missed my chance so any tips on how to degenrerate her into a a cheating slag would be a lot of help

The Korol shit is pretty nice, I was going to get Rachaminoff because the name is absolutely based and matched my melancholic mood but I made a good choice with this shit because it is smooth af

>beautiful polish girl at work who I barely speak with to cheat on her boyfriend with me
ngl lad none of this fills me with confidence

Walk into work the next day you're in wearing nothing but a bowtie and hit her with the young patter.

If she cheats on a lad for you, she's just going to cheat on you eventually lad

I rate intelligence highly but I'm not a middle class Guardian lonely hearts group participant, not interested in thickos.
What I rate most is wit and the ability to laugh at yourself and your fuck ups, I dislike people taking themselves too seriously.

t. Pigeon lass. I don't want a date, I'm saying there are people out there who like nerds and geeks far more than gorms.

ROLF HARRIS IS INNOCENT

Yes, it's really refreshing and makes bags go down.

how often do I have to do it?

I really don't care. At this point I'm just obsessed with beauty, facial symmetry, strong skull structure and wanting to fuck the brains out of it. No doubt I'll be over it after cumming if it ever comes to that

FYI she has nice supple, C/D cup titties that complement her tall, slim, figure and facial beauty

I look forward to seeing the pics lad. I hope they're not the opposite sex or you'll have your hands even fuller.

Every time you plan on going out and don't want to look a wreck. It's a temporary fix, if you've got major black bags:
Sort your sleep pattern out.
Drink more water.
There's potions women use and you could see a dermatologist if they bother you that much.

Yeah kek I've read a lot about how people buy pairs that are misgendered and they had no idea. Going to have to double check their sex. Going to decorate their tank all natural-like, sort of like pic related. I'll try and take some pictures for you when I get them

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People who are innocent and victimised by normies:

Rolf Harris
Jimmy Savile
Amer Hussain
Adam Johnson

haha great stuff
*hands you top memer award*

Everyone i know suffers or has suffered from depression and anxiety. Something obviously wrong with this world

It caused a bit of a row on here last time for reasons I won't go into but I learned how to sex ducklings here (find out their gender).
Bear in mind I live on a farm. My landlord taught me how to dowse for water and it works, there's lots of country ways people don't know about other than that.
To sex an animal, take a needle and thread and hold the thread above the animal so the needle is pointing towards it.
Wait for the needle to move, if it goes in circles it's female and if it swings backwards and forwards in a straight line it's male.
I did this and it was 100% accurate, out of 8 ducklings 3 were drakes. Might be worth checking before you take them home if you don't want a gerbil colony taking over your home.

That's a really cool tank, lots to explore. How big is yours?

3ft by 1ft, I'm worried it's too small for them though, there's a lot of conflicting information online, don't mind buying a new one if need be.

rolfharrisisinnocent.com/

That's bigger than the example pic you posted, to me it sounds fine. What size did the pet shop owner recommend?

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Ah I didn't ask him, I should have. The general rule of thumb seems to be 5-10 gallons of space per gerbil, it's a 22 gallon tank so it should be fine

>tfw havent wanked in over a week

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Maybe ring him tomorrow to confirm but to me, who admittedly has never owned a rodent, it sounds plentiful.
I guess once you start building their environment inside you'll get a feel for the place and know if something is too big and crowds the tank. I had this with a rock I got for my salt water fish tank, the size of it made it look too crowded so I belted it with a hammer and made it into a smaller rock. All of the stuff in your example pic looks hand made, even the wheel. Are you going to make things like that?

Nah you can stuff like that on Amazon, theres quite a lot of natural wood themed stuff for them which I prefer, not a fan of cages and tanks that are filled with plastic they'll just chew through and could cut themselves on

>Tfw not going to sleep at 7am today.
Goodnight lads.

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is it even worth trying to learn a british accent? im so jealous of smart people in western countries who speak perfect foreign english. i have a shitty eastern european accent and sound like an absolute troll

>a british accent
by that you mean posh middle class English accent? Most of the country sound like mongs even to us