"I'm not going to abandon you"

There's robot blood on your hands reiko.

I agree with you, that's why I don't go to therapy.
If he had told me I was annoying I would have changed, I just wanted him to like me.
I don't think reiko really had anything to do with me doing this.

>I would have changed, I just wanted him to like me
This behaviour is annoying in itself.

Someone who would do literally anything you want to make you happy is annoying?

People always say shit like this, "I want to make you happy" or "I love you" and they don't actually mean it so they don't do anything about it
Suck my dick

I do mean it though, if there was something about me he didn't like I would have changed it for him. If there was something he wanted me to do that wasn't extremely painful/immoral/disgusting then I would have done it for him. I guess saying it was to make him happy isn't exactly true, since really I would be doing it out of the selfish desire of wanting him not to leave me.

Yes. It puts all the responsibility on me.

Is saying "I don't like it when you do X" or "I want you to Y" really that much responsibility?

or maybe he realized he wants a real girl hhhmmmm

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Frankly, yes. If someone were to ask the same of you, would you say anything other than "don't leave me"?

It's possible, feels pretty bad I fucked myself and my life up for someone who is just going to replace me.
I wouldn't have asked for anything because he was perfect. There was obviously something wrong with me though since he left and I would have much rather just changed what was wrong instead of him leaving.

>bpd and a tranny
Well, color me surprised that he dropped you.

My bpd didn't cause issues and I was on hrt because he wanted me to be. I don't know why he left.

>I don't know why he left
He used you to sate his fetish, now you are joining the 40%.

Did his family knew about it tho?

Would someone actually do that? He was so nice to me though while we were together, it felt like he really cared about me. I don't want to believe that he could be that terrible.
No, his family lived out of the country. His stepdad came by once and he said I could meet him if I wanted but I was too embarrassed.

If you have BPD the only person you have to blame is yourself. Fix your own problems before trying to have a relationship.

If you arent okay in the head, no relationship is gonna work

>girls date literally any guy that isn't me
>surprised it turns out badly
JUST GIVE ME A CHANCE I WANT TO LOVE SOMEONE AND BE LOVED

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What if he told you to be yourself and stop trying to alter yourself to please him?

>I don't want to believe that he could be that terrible.
You are BPD, a living proof people can be that terrible.

I didn't do any of the BPD stuff that ends relationships. I didn't fight with him or act jealous or too needy or anything like that, I tried so hard to make him happy and he just bailed like everyone in my life.
Not a girl.
Then I would have kept being myself and him saying that would have made me feel really happy.
Why am I terrible? What have I done that makes me a bad person?

why doesnt chad love me etc etc

Thats BPD, thats what it does. You dont realize the actions you are comminiting. Go get therapy

>i'm afraid you'll abandon me user
"no i won't i'm serious about this relationship"

fast forward 1 month
>you're too serious about this relationship user, i can't reciprocate the feelings you have
>i actually like it when guys don't really care about me that much
>ciao
the evil fucking irony
it's been years and i'm still not over it
tfw no loving gf

>Why am I terrible? What have I done that makes me a bad person?
Bipolar people destroy their friends and families by manipulation and emotional stress. The hell should I know what you did wrong, I don't associate with [1] any BPD people [2] transvestites. I have enough drama in my life without those. And yes, you trannies are just a fetish, he chased you for it, most likely. Like landwhales. No normal human would love a hamplanet, only fetishists that want to either feed them till gravitational collapse, or eat their shit.

I really haven't done anything that terrible, even when someone hurts me I don't try to retaliate, I just take it out on myself.
He wasn't chad, he was a robot.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
I'm not bipolar, I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder which is something else. I don't think I was too stressful for him to be around and I'm not manipulative.

Is it really not possible for someone to love me?

yeah yeah he wasnt chad etc etc

>i'm not bipolar
He's bipolar, isn't he?

>I have problems and I take it out on myself
GET THERAPY
No one is going to love you if youre not able to function healthily

What makes you think I could get chad?
I don't think he was bipolar, he was really emotionally stable.
Therapy is a scam, I've tried cbt and dbt and got literally nothing out of either except for the feeling that my therapist was judging me.

How would you feel if he was reading everything right now?

Well no wonder he left you, you are ill and do not want help.

You will not ever be happy if you dont see that you have problems that need to be fixed. Stop blaming others

i love how you can see from the replies that its a femoid. god women are retarded. please neck yourself

Extremely embarrassed, and also kind of ashamed. Logically though I guess it wouldn't make a huge difference if he saw because there's no chance he'll ever talk to me again, but it would still bother me.
It's not that I don't want help, I wish more than anything that I could just be normal and happy, it's just that I don't think I can be. I feel like I'm just fundamentally broken me nothing will ever make me better, being with him was probably the only time in my life where I felt like my problems weren't so bad.
If you read the replies you would see that I'm not a femoid.

Why would you feel any shame? Have you lied in any moment?

Because it's pretty pathetic to make sad and public posts about how much you miss someone who you meant nothing to. Doubly so when it's been months after the fact and you haven't even begun to recover.

He told you that to so you'd shut up. You know it as well as we do. Why do you keep making this thread? It's clear you're not looking for answers. Is it the attention?

Talking about it makes me feel a little less bad temporarily, it's better than sobbing to myself in bed.

It's almost an entire year, right?

I know it's not the same thing but maybe it's similar. My partner passed away a little over a year ago, kinda struggled with that for a long time, still do actually. I don't know how long you two were together but you'll do better eventually. Might take some time but you aren't doing yourself any favours by focusing on it so much. Hope you can move on in your own time.

>posts this same fucking thread every day
>has BPD
>is a tranny
Color me fucking surprised. Do everyone a favor and take your own life already.

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He broke up with me at the start of february. The last time we talked was the start of march and it was just him telling me to get over it already. I'm pretty sure he blocked my number after that.
It's pretty similar, probably harder honestly even without the whole rejection element. I'm glad you've started to recover, but I'm not sure that I will. I really have nothing else going on in my life and things are just getting worse.
I wish I could just disappear, killing myself seems too hard.

Killing yourself is quite simple actually. If you have a rope you can hang yourself and all you'd need is a chair. If you have some money a shotgun to the face will solve all your problems! Or since you're a worthless attention whore you could try laying down on some train tracks to hopefully slice your head off.

>He broke up with me at the start of february.
Cool, i was just throwing bait thinking you were someone else
I'm almost sure he dumped you because of shame of having a trans/tranny gf and had too much pride on himself
I don't know how this can helps

You know, it's funny: When I was seeing a girl with BPD, she lost interest in me the second I began to try and get invested in the relationship. After some petty thing, she kicked me to the curb. Fast forward a while, and she hits me up about "wanting me in her life" since I didn't speak to her since, and "hated her". I do, have a decent get together, get invested, and she was then standoff-ish again.
Just don't get involved with BPD girls, it's female psychopathy. They want to madly love someone, and it sure as shit doesn't matter to them if it's you specifically.

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I said hard, not complex. All of those things are simple but require a tremendous amount of willpower. The only one I might be able to go through with is shooting myself but I don't have access to a firearm.
It's possible, but I'll never know.

>but I'll never know.
I'm sure you will, just think a little bit about the situation
As for advice, find a guy (or a girl, if you like this sort of thing) that has no shame of being a fag, or else it's going to happen the same thing again

Except I didn't break up with him, he left me. I wasn't standoffish and I wouldn't have become that way, I wanted to spend my life with him.

Even if I met someone new now I wouldn't be able to connect with them, I just want to get back with my ex.

He didn't seem like he was ashamed of it, he took me out in public and even offered to let me meet his stepdad.

>The point
>...
>(You)
Thank you for illustrating my argument. You're only invested because he's not. If he were, you'd say you two just don't "click", and send 'em packing.

>he took me out in public
>stepdad
Showing you to stranger people that don't know both of you are super easy, and his stepdad is not nearly the same thing as showing you to his real dad, this is only a illusion you're creating to think that he cared you more than he actually did

I hate people who try to tell me how I think or feel. I was invested when he was invested too, why would I not be? Being with him was probably the happiest period in my life, and then it suddenly ended.
I guess that's possible then, it doesn't really make me feel any better though. I just want him to come back.

Keep harassing him then i guess, send him an email, call him

>why would I not be?
Borderline, that's why. And "I don't like being told how I think or feel"? Fuck off, get some self awareness, and remind yourself how you begin all of these shitty fucking threads by stating how all men speak and think.

I stopped contacting him after I realized I was blocked. I have his email but I don't see the point in reaching out if he's just going to ignore me/block me again.
Not all people with BPD are the same, just because your ex with BPD did that doesn't mean I would. The generalizations about men are a bait and obviously not true considering I am a man.