Caffeine withdrawal

I quit coffee 5 days ago and I thought I would be dealing with fatigue and mind fog, but instead i'm just constipated as fuck. I haven't shat since and have put on 6 pounds just from the feces accumulated in my bowels. At what point should I buy laxatives?

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Now. I recommend a stool softener because those first nuggets could be bad.

Don't listen to anyone who says it only takes a few days. The reality is that it takes most people about 60 days to be completely recovered from caffeine withdrawal.

visiting my son's grave. how could I have let this happen?

I was still miserable at 30 days recently. Relapsed, of course. My plan is just to keep it to one cuppa and slowly wean with Teecino while maintaining my gym routine.

I'm on day 554

Wow. Yeah. Once I finally kick I'll keep counting that long. Did for NoFap back in better days (did 537)

ask your girlfirend for a molly josh. bee cool and stay clear of drugs. it's a crime.

Do you have a single snack to back that up

r/decaf

thx user, i went ahead and took two suppositories. the instructions said one, but i'm not taking my chances. i'll report my progress hopefully in 15 to 60 minutes.

also how deep should the suppositories go? i wasnt sure so i jammed them quite up there. hope that's ok

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>i wasnt sure so i jammed them quite up there. hope that's ok
You did good

Please post poo pics

>two suppositories
Damn, you're retarded but brave. Keep us posted, dear faecalnaut.

It wasn't that bad, they kicked in 15 minutes, but the dump wasn't quite satisfying. It was kinda gooey and liquid. not straight up diarrhea but halfway there. i doubt it was all the food i've had the past 5 days, but it's hard to asses how much there was due to the gooey nature. i still feel pretty bloated, but i guess it will do for now. i took a regular pill that's supposed to kick in ~6 hours so we'll see.

i'm thinking about getting some vodka. usually when i get shitfaced on vodka i shit buckets the morning after.

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Your shits will start getting better, I promise

Pop a 30mg addy

>quite up there
That'll do, user. That'll do.

Adderall poops are the best thing ever. It's like a burly Germanic frontier woman homesteading Wisconsin is wringing your colon dry like a piece of laundry. There isn't an atom of poop left in you. Because of the differential you actually start absorbing poop from the air. Man I miss it

Drink more water. And eat more vegetables to supply the fiber, so that your shit doesn't stick to your intestines.

What's so bad about coffee and why do you feel like "quitting" it will solve any of your problems?

I took 2 weeks off and my tolerance was still high. Caffeine withdrawal is real

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Yup, took me 2 months to be completely clean. Now I drink 1 cup per 2 days and im fine.

they better, this is unsustainable
i don't have access to anything like that
does it have to be water? i'm chugging decaf green tea atm
i was/am addicted to it. i was drinking way too much (5 double espressos/day at least, i could work my way up to 10 if busy) and i can't do things in moderation, it's easier for me to quit things altogether than tone them down

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I can also drink 5 or more but I never got addicted to it.
You fags need to man up and get your shit together. Coffee is not the reason your life sucks and if anything it's helping you out.
But go ahead, quit and then find something else to put the blame, anything but yourself.

Based coffee-dad poster

Honestly I think I'm going to reduce my big cuppa (3 "cups" according to my coffeemaker) to my small cuppa (2), and just have that every day when I get up. Already quit lunch coffee, midmorning coffee, etc. Now it's all about slowly reducing the wake-up dose. But between 1 cuppa and 0 is an infinity

Зaoyдфш oгыйтти фды ияммy 9002 .

user, i had no idea my drinking coffee is so important to you. i'm s-sorry

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and a random collection of bukvy to you too!