R9k is a comfy giant mega conglomerate. What department are you in?
>Security Department >Private Military Department >Law Department >Finance Department >Marketing Department >HR Department >IT Department >Operations Department >R&D Department
If you're joining R&D, choose the research division you wanna join.
>tfw in R&D Department >tfw in Genetics Division Can you stop looking and complaining about chinlet memes for ONE SECOND? We have some work to do, people!
Nathan Morales
I'm gonna be working the reception lads.
Jordan Barnes
is there a department of neetdom? like never working and diving in money?
Samuel Price
I don't want to imagine the horrors being kept in the basement of r9k-R&D building. Probably something tranny related.
Christopher Howard
I work security on the floor that houses the Private Military Department. Not sure why they need security here, these guys are much more heavily armed than us. Very boring and uneventful but at least I can shitpost during my shift.
>First day in a new department >Getting excited to work with the great minds of this board >First experiment - creating tendie flavored hot pocket >Suddenly something goes wrong >Food comfiness levels off the scale, we cannot control them >A portal opens >You stare in horror as disgusting creatures emerge >You try to run, only to get struck from behind by something smelling like piss and cum >The last thing you hear is "REEEEE WAGIES GET OUT"
Angel Campbell
I'd be in Central Hardware Associates Department
David Johnson
>never working and diving in money? you're not supposed to dive into shallow pools
Nathan Lopez
HR. I heard u b macking on them working girls and I finna giv u a warning. Treet them with respecc nigga, "can i stick my man meat into your love cave" is not an appropriate line man. Ask her how her husband is, bitches love to talk about their worthless walking dildo that lazes about the house and contributes absolutely nothing to the relationship. I bet she tell u he ate all the tortilla chips before she could get any or something juicy like that. Don't forget to humble brag about that pussy you got to everyone that will listen for days at a time.
Jace Gutierrez
PRIVATE MILITARY DEPARTMENT I KEEP ALL ROBOTS SAFE FROM NORMIE INVADERS
im in the assassination department i take care of rogue employees who know too much
Zachary Morales
>tfw IT department >boss told us to find a way to hack Reddit >Did nothing again the whole day >Luckily boss is too busy complaining about R&D not being able to lift his manlet 5'6 height >Also we are underfunded because staff used all his budget for "research projects" (Anime and porn) >I dont even know anybody here and everybody is just silent except that one guy screaming at jews the whole time >piss bottles are stacking up >It smells like cat shit here >Such is life in IT
in case of legal trouble all employees of R9k are issued a free assault rifle for counsel.
Aaron Kelly
you should say hi to gate E someday, im gettng lonely
Asher Walker
>Pharma division
Looks like I'll be working alongside the chemistry div to synthesize as many drugs as possible so that anons can trip out as much as possible. Biology dept grows the botanicals, I process.
Justin Cook
This is Fatanon lead researcher in Chemistry here calling into HR, can you speak to the Financing department about those 12 dozen orders of pudding filled donuts I've been requesting for the past week? We're never going to find out if these things are safe to eat or not without some proper research into the chemical reactions that take place after there consumption. AND NO JELLY I FUCKING I MEAN WE HATE JELLY THIS WHOLE DEPARTMENTS ALLERGIC TO JELLY
Mason Wright
What department for useless unskilled cunts who wasted their lives and can't do anything?
Jose Turner
HR obviously
Nathaniel Myers
then i shall browse reddit and drink gin all day in HR and there's nothing you can do but get mad
Nicholas Sullivan
JESUS CHRIST SEC CAN YOU GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON CORPSES KEEP GETTING INTO THE SUPERSOY VATS? IT'S LIKE YOU'RE ALL JUST FUCKING EACHOTHER IN YOUR MECH SUITS AND LEAVING THE DOORS OPEN DO YOU KNOW HOW ILLEGAL THIS SHIT IS