Big willy syndrome is real and alive

hehe you are a chodeowner

Is that not standard?

what the fuck are all those little skin things

Wrapping adds length to your measurement proportional to the thickness of the tape. To measure circumference with a tape you need to measure the diameter or radius and calculate the circumference. However, I doubt anyone has ever measured their dick circumference that way, so I think you are right and this is the standard technique for measuring dick circumference.

I followed instructions on a dick-measuring site to the letter - I even used a tailor's tape. I was sure I was measuring wrong myself until I dropped a couple hundred bucks on sex toys and most of them were either painful or didn't fit at all.

Look buddy. No homo, but I'm gonna need a glimpse of that willy.

yeah, show us the hammer

they look a lot like the papillae on your tongue. That dick can taste

Fuck no. I've been groped and propositioned by enough homos, thanks. If it makes you feel better to think I'm lying go ahead - it would make me feel better to be able to fit into anything worth fucking for once.

I remember I had a similar condition when I used a hotel room's lotion to masturbate. I didn't know it was scented lotion until I used it and didn't really know how bad it was for my penis until it just started cracking up and looking like the OP pic. My penis took some time to recover but after about two months my penis started looking kinda normal.

bruh I can fit an entire cactus up my arsehole

Yeah, I said worth fucking. Your arsehole is not included.

i feel like surgery could easy fix this no? just slice it off
also stop posting this disgusting shit