This is the final pill. While a few of you have just lacked opportunities, many of us are not made for relationships - at our very core. We want to be left alone. We don't want any responsibility. We get sick of people quickly. We don't want to *really* reveal our true selves. Ultimately, we want to be left alone.
I'm 31. Still here. I had a girlfriend for 5 years who I thought was the one. She was a virgin before me. She was beautiful. She saw me as masculine, as someone who could look after her, and as someone she wanted to have a child with. For a long time I thought I was - or at least *could be* - all of those things. Then, as time went on, I realised I wasn't. I just wanted to be left alone. I just wanted to browse Jow Forums. You think it won't happen to you, but it will. We are too far gone. Our habits and selfishness are too entrenched. Just wait until you get a girlfriend. You'll see. You are not the idealized version of yourself that you create in your head, in your dreams, in your fantasies. You are your behaviour. You are what you are. It's over boyos.
hello fellow actual robot. nu9k will be along soon to reeee at you but you're right and what's more, there's nothing wrong with it. it's okay to be alone, it's okay to want to be alone. i think too many people have been convinced they can't be alone, shouldn't be alone, or are simply afraid of it.
be social if you want but don't if you don't want. it's fine.
t. 34
Eli Gutierrez
I've realized this more and more as time went on. I don't want a relationship or a marriage, and you're right that I definitely never wanted responsibility. I get lonely sometimes, but I don't want people living with me or around all the time, I just want some people to play vidya with in the evenings now and then.
Landon Fisher
Pretty much exactly the same story except I still go fuck bitches every now and again the only reason I am here is because I meant to click on /b/
You guys may want to check out the term "Aromantic" - someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction.
It looks like a "tumblr" thing but I still believe in it.
Blake Barnes
that and the other a- word are words i do feel about myself but i don't bother using here because memes.
Jeremiah Gonzalez
went to a party a year ago and realized the same thing except it was about being with normal people. i realized it wasn't some illusion they clinged to, that was what they considered fun and i cant be a part of it. guess the same goes with relationships. in the future i will try to get some mentally unstable gf and boost her confidence enough so she can go out there. my purpose is in the sidelines.
Eli Foster
yeah I understand full well where you're coming from OP. I don't even like talking to my family all that much, and I keep contact with my few irl friends to a minimum. I wouldn't enjoy being in a relationship with an overbearing woman who always expects more from me when I could just sit at home and play vidya. The occasional bouts of loneliness are corrected with a good wank and a pizza, never was the kind of person to enjoy the company of others much.
Colton Nguyen
OP here - thanks for that, was not familiar with the concept. Sounds about right. I am definitely happier when I have *some* kind of social circle - but I like it to be fleeting, and somewhat shallow. Work friends, 'relationships' I build while travelling etc ... I instinctively avoid anything deeper than that. I'd prefer to project to the world just what I'm comfortable with revealing, and leave the rest (i.e negatives - laziness, anxiety, low self esteem etc) to myself. Maybe everyone does this to some extent, I don't know, but for me it's more pronounced. Shallow relationships are what make me happy. Deep ones do not. Sure, I fantasise often about holding someone who deeply knows me, I hug my pillow like everyone else here - but I know this is just an illusion. It's not real. I don't *really* want all the baggage that goes with it. I want that temporary validation, and no more responsibility than that. This is why I like travelling so much. Every person I meet is only for a few days. We meet, share what we like, have a moment and then move on, never to see each other again. This is my ideal. It's not normal, but it's what works for me. Which makes me feel fundamentally broken as a person. But it is what it is. That's my reality.
Jose Walker
That's interesting, I'm also aromantic but I like deep long-lasting friendships.
Whatever floats your boat though, I'll still respect you.
Luke Allen
>being a robot >looking down on anybody amazing you haven't killed yourself yet actual depression and therapy ads specifically targeting this board lmfao
Nolan Diaz
>going to the front page to click on boards >seeing ads lmaoing @ you're life rn
Gabriel Martin
thank you all, its good to know I'm not the only one
Josiah Lee
ditto **orginak
Samuel Sanders
>not using an adblock you have to be 18 or older to post here
Austin Martin
that was basically my point, yes. thank you for your support.
Caleb Green
Same dude, I tried a relationship and I loved her to death but goddamn did I hate being around her. I just don't wanna be with someone all the time. I hang out with friends every week but honestly I like to be alone like 6 days a week. Physical affection and connection is nice but once you have it it gets old until you lose it again so I just kind of hop from one girl to the next and have flings. I hate myself and hate everyone else so I've just got my few friends in life and that's it.
It's really nice having all this excess income while my friends complain all the time about being broke cuz they have kids and wives.
And honestly, most girls don't even say anything about all of my cutting scars. Maybe they don't notice or are too horny to care but that's the thing I'm usually self conscious about.
Jose Miller
>cutting scars I related to everything else you said except this. what are cutting scars? You mean on your arms?
Lincoln Cruz
I used to be a psycho and cut my legs, not anymore tho
Dylan Collins
i feel you OP. Everyone says I'm emotionally distant. Not really to be honest. I desperately want to connect with a girl, have a relationship, have a family et cetera but every time I take a step in that direction, I also break it off out of no where and throw grenades behind me so I don't have to deal with it anymore. Then I feel that relief; that rush of finally.
Then its usually bout another year before I'm longing for some kind of real feels with or girl or a friend or something and I come to Jow Forums to remind myself why I shouldn't. never works.
shouldn't be long now before I take a break from this place and pretend I can be what I wish I was.
Easton Nelson
It kinda makes me sad how obvious this always was to me. I'm glad for my parent's sake that my older brother is engaged and plans on having kids. It'd be real rough if I were an only child. Then again, maybe I wouldn't have turned out this way if I were an only child.
Evan Young
>I desperately want to connect with a girl, have a relationship, have a family et cetera but every time I take a step in that direction, I also break it off out of no where and throw grenades behind me so I don't have to deal with it anymore. Then I feel that relief; that rush of finally this. i wish it weren't true. but this.
Ayden Myers
Nobody wants to mention them because it's uncomfortable. Probably for the best though?
Elijah Gutierrez
except I don't throw grenades, I keep them at arms length and keep requesting/receiving their nudes. I am shitty. There's no more rationalising it. I just want fleeting relationships and nothing more.
Andrew Perry
what an awful image
Ethan Watson
I don't want to join society. I want them all to die. I think there was a point I could have been encouraged to join society, but it is gone. Mutilation of the American penis was part. But it continues forever! Conform, conform - join pancultural nonsense or be raped by strange niggers in prison who like to exchange ramen noodles for sodomy. And I do mean sodomy! Against God. It used to be the underbelly, but now people push their children into this. Human sexual display - breast, genitals, etc, disgust me. My greatest desire is the end of all life. I want it to end. All of it. I realize this is also degenerate, but I am at a state of nuke from orbit.
You must be a big piece of shit to use that picture for our thread, piece of shit degenerate go hang yourself.
Josiah Martinez
for your thread
Jonathan Jenkins
Desperate incel
Jason Hill
unoriginal nigger.
Alexander Cooper
I can't believe you just typed out what I feel on a daily. I've had a few girlfriends who thought I was the fucking man and I broke up with them because they always wanted to be with me or text me all the time. I've consulted with my friends and they all said that "I just haven't found the one yet" but I don't think that's the case. With that said, I don't want to be like this forever. I've stopped dating random girls and i'm currently on a quest to find someone just like me, someone who really gets me (cliche i know). The loneliness is manageable but i fear one day I won't be able to handle it anymore or i'll turn into a total weirdo with no social skills like the majority of this board.
Blake Fisher
30 here with a gf of 2 years. I'm slowly realizing what you wrote here. The lack of freedom is crushing and it's not getting better. As stupid as it sounds I think part of my longing for a relationship was due to marinating my subconscious mind in anime and its idealized portrayal of life, too much for too long. The rest was a mix of fear of missing out, bitterness, and yes the thought like many hold here that a relationship could "fix" me and my life.
>She saw me as masculine, as someone who could look after her Same here. I was very surprised that someone found me masculine and manly in general.
Our habits and selfishness are too entrenched. Just wait until you get a girlfriend. You'll see. You are not the idealized version of yourself that you create in your head, in your dreams, in your fantasies. You are your behaviour. You are what you are. It's over boyos
take it back take it back take it back
Samuel King
Brutal isn't it. There's no way forward from this realisation either. It's over. Just got to accept it doesn't get any better.
Daniel Stewart
Glad I realized that shit long before ever getting a gf. Never had one, never will. I'm an uninteresting, selfish prick. I'm just a shell, there's nothing deeper than the surface and having a relationship won't fill the gaping, bitter void.
