Hemroids getting worse

Well I was thinking going to a store or pharmacy and buying something but I have no knowledge of what to get, and I don't want to be standing there in the aisle for like 10 minutes checking ass cream.

I guess I'll try looking online. The dumb grocery stores near me though don't have online product browser.

No nothing, but I'm thinking about getting it now, it's getting so bad.

I think it's less diet and more my shit schedule. I sort of tried suggested diets for the problem and they didn't work because my shit schedule is still the same way.

user, hemorrhoid ointment/cream is like $5. I've only had one once, but that cream definitely helped (it's also good for when your asshole burns after taking a spicy liquid shit). Don't even bother getting the name brand Preparation H.
You can also get stool softener if you need it.

I know these things exist I just don't know anything about them, do you have recommended brand or some such?

Preparation H is the most well-known brand, but store brands are cheaper and typically have similar ingredients. They've worked fine for me. Just squirt some on your finger and rub it around the bump.
There are also hemorrhoidal pads you can use to wipe instead of toilet paper (if it is too abrasive).

Pop them stick a needle in it you can numb with a ice cube or popsicle

They are blood vessels, don't do this.

Ok thank you I will have to try that. Going to the grocery store like 3 am, getting a number of items along with the cream, and doing self checkout.

Stay well hydrated and go to the bathroom as soon as you feel the urge. Every time. If you aren't well hydrated or you hold your poops they get dried out and end up huge and rock hard. This is what causes the problem in the first place, anus destroyers. To start with address it at its root. Replace your toilet paper with preparation H medicated wet wipes, or just wet wipes in general. It's much, more easier on your butt than dry abrasive toilet paper. Then apply a dab of the cream after it's clean. Every time. They should go away eventually and you can stop using the cream as much, unless it was a rough turd. Keep using wet wipes and stay hydrated.

insert chilis in your ass, capsaicin numbs the nerve endings

Thing is my shits aren't dry, huge, or hard. They seem pretty normal or even small. It's just that there's a lot of them, I basically only take one dump a week, so it takes a long time to shit it all out.

Not the nature of the turds so to speak, but the schedule.

>I basically only take one dump a week
That's it? What's your diet like?
I already shit three times today, but that was all liquid fire from eating too much cheese and liquor last night.

Have you tried any of the over the counter stuff? They help a bit

I've never done anything before because it didn't really hurt so much, now it's really hurting so I'm looking for options.

Yeah, one crap per 5-7 days always. You might think that taking about an hour long dump once a week wouldn't be as bad as several dumps per day, but no, still getting literal butthurt.

My diet I don't think is even that bad. I'm not like having salads all day, but I'm also not eating fast food for every meal like some people. I guess more meat heavy but again, I'm not having steaks every day, usually chicken in fact.