Why was i cursed with the desire to be a girl?

i started having crossdressing fantasies from a very young age, and now Im a hairless twink in his early 20s. Sexually submissive, not much desire for traditional fucking even though I like hot girls. Dont like masculine or hairy bodies, dont find them attractive nor do i want one. Im more or less fine how I am now but I dont want to get older or more masculine.

Id shave my leg hair and armpits if it were socially acceptable. People Ive known my whole life have commented on how skinny I am, Im unusually lean and young looking.

It gets worse as time passes tho

too much estrogen and lack of testoserone. I swear if opfound a way to boost his testostorone the thought of being a girl would seem comical. There will be a constant overwhelming urge to fuck girls and make fun of sissies.

Depends. GD due to actual tranny-ness can yeah. AGP doesn't, nor does it's offshoots.

Because you spent years pleasuring yourself to degenerate shit and rewired your brain to be a degenerate.

Adorable boys like you need to thrust their cute little butt into warm pussy.

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Not him, but i've had these fantasies and envy forever, yet i'm pretty high T. Extremely low and deep voice, chad manjaw, masculine interests (except sports), acne etc. I'm certainly not high in androgen either. I have a masculine body with broad shoulders, very large hand, feet, head etc.

You weren't born with it, it's estrogen in the water and xenoestrogen from plastics, it's the sedentary lifestyle making you secrete less masculine hormones and liberal or neglected single mother raising.

Blanchards theories are probably bullshit

I am right in assuming you guys all watch an excessive amount of anime, correct?

It's not blanchardism, AGP is real, you don't have to agree with everything he says ofc, but the paraphilia is completely real.
No, my girl fantasies/ autogynephilia started long before I watched any anime. I've been aroused by the idea of being a woman/ turning into one ever since my very early childhood, but started watching anime in my last teens.

Op here i dont watch much anime

>I've been aroused by the idea of being a woman/ turning into one ever since my very early childhood
You must have had some traumatic experience, the desire to become the other gender certainly doesn't pop up on its own.

>AGP is real, you don't have to agree with everything he says ofc, but the paraphilia is completely real.

Ok i did have agp as a child but now i just want to be a girl

do explain why you think this

You probably think you have more testostorone than you actually do, under the current conditions theres not many ways you can naturally have normal levels of testostorone without actually doing something about it like working out and taking supplements and shit.

>except sports
there you go that right there is probably the reason why you have low t symptoms.

It's barely a true desire most of the time, it's just an idea that turns me on very intensely, more than anything else. I had it for as far as I can remember. My childhood was normal until my mother's death, which came later.
It's AGP tittling with your subconscious. AGP is a freudian Id. You certainly can cope. If you hadn't had agp and just wanted to be a girl and hated being a guy (consciously) forever, then i'd say it's probably very hard to cope with. But agp/ desire to be is copable. And it doesn't expand on it's own.

>It's barely a true desire most of the time, it's just an idea that turns me on very intensely
In other words, a fetish?

If I had low T, why would I be more masculine than 80% of the guys around me without even working out? Everything around me is super thin etc, while i have a more masculine build.
And I do some sport; I go to the swimming pool for an hour weekly plus daily pushups, I just don't like watching sport.
>the reason why you have low t symptoms
Except i dont? I don't have any low T syndrom, I have high T syndroms.

Of course it is. I'd be more enclined to call it a paraphilia, because it tends to creep into my sexuality constantly. Like pedophilia would for a pedo.
But as you probably know fetishes/ sexual drive is powerful and can influence other part of the thought process, causing stuff like "desire to be a girl" or even some kind of "dysphoria".
But I'm certain these syndroms are curable and tend to be caused by depersonalization (which can be itself fueld by agp) and depression.

I wish I was a girl too. My whole life was so fucking shit because of my looks. I am skinny as fuck (113 lbs), I am short as fuck (5'6) and I was raped when I was 10. The desire to be a girl came up out of nowhere, when I was 11, maybe 12. What did go wrong?

>I was raped when I was 10
>The desire to be a girl came up out of nowhere, when I was 11, maybe 12
Hmmm really makes you think

Larpp

Personally, I believe that this desire is a way to cope with and caused by the difficulties and responsibilities of living as a man. I was also in the same position as you, but where you and I differ perhaps is the general outlook on life.
Sometimes you just have to eat shit temporarily and spit it out in revenge later on, or in this case discovering the secrets to time travelling and getting the hell out of this miserable timeline.

I wish it was a larp man, I really wish

Why does it get worse if its just agp?

who raped you

originalll

I raped him

ama me anything

Stop watching porn.

this is not a novel comment.

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bullshit you're lieing
show us your build then, you are probably a twink looking faggot.

My "friend", we used to play and stuff. One time he came by when noone was home, and he wanted me to lick his dick and stuff, but I didn't want to. Then he used my ass and later pretended like nothing has ever happened. I was scared as fuck, I didn't tell anyone about this to this day. Luckily we moved out a few weeks after it happened, so I didn't have to see him again

It's probably partly it, but the fetish part itself, I think, is just that, a fetish/paraphilia. There is no need to find it's cause as often there is none, and in return one shouldn't let it rule their own life. Especially something as messy as AGP.
Being without a care is desirable, but when I daydream about being a girl I'm just doing stuff i'd like from an action movie or whatever, as a girl, it feels more attractive and interesting i guess? Either personal taste or caused by agp. But coupled with disgust at one's existence due to social anxiety/isolation, it can quicky depersonalize yourself, and you end up drowning on these fantasies and daydreams. It's true, i have a lot less motivation doing stuff when I'm my male self than when i'm in my daydreams. But that's also just because, well, life is pretty hard, so of course dreams are better.
But with all this, I still don't understand how one can become a tranny. Being an actual, irl woman wouldn't be great (altrhou a turn on, of course), but a tranny? That's pretty insane. That's what determined for me that AGPs, at least my kind, must be different from regular trannies.
Either way, in these kind of situation, the only way is to try to repersonalize (which is hard but of course not impossible), refamiliarizing with one's male body, and trying to diversify one's daydreams so they slowly include onesef as a guy, etc etc

I'm not a twink lol, I wish I was but I'm certainly not, I'm 73kg, 1m84. Why would I lie about that?
Also thank god i'm not a twink, having a masculine body makes it easier to repress.

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