Sad virgins of Jow Forums

Sad virgins of Jow Forums,

For a limited time only, I'm giving advice to those who are clueless about women.

You're here, so you obviously need it.

Ask away.

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what are some pickup lines that are guaranteed to mesmerize her and drop her panties?

None of them really work.

However, you can use the ones everyone knows in an ironic way. Making a girl laugh is the best way to get into her pants.

How does babby made?

>Making a girl laugh is the best way to get into her pants.
No the fuck it isn't. You can be hilarious and it doesn't do you a damn bit of good if you're not attractive. If the bitch likes you she'll laugh at anything you say. I wish people would stop saying this shit.

What do I do If I think dating is too much of a hassle?

eh its kinda true. they like funny guys.

how do i into get gf?

How do I know if random girls find me attractive?

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they only laugh at handsome guys' jokes. don't confuse cause with effect.

So I went out with this girl to an art museum a few weeks ago. She told me she didn't want me to think it was a date. I've been messaging her random autistic stuff off and on since then. Should I ask her out again

this
used to be the class clown but I still got rejected by every girl I asked out. don't have a problem with it but acting like being funny is a surefire way to get laid/a relationship is just not true.

They touch their hair

oh god no. she explicitly told you shes not interested in dating you. why are you still even talking to her at this point.

>want to be friends first and have a lot in common
>cant be introduced to anyone by friends i already have since we almost only hang out with each other and barely anyone else
>no job yet but starting on monday, most of the people there are old
>hard time bonding with anyone new over the internet because i rarely have anything to say
>most online communities centered around the things i like are 99% guys

What do I do, OP?

I don't know. I guess it's because she's been messaging me first. Your conclusion seems likely though

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Not the guy, but respect yourself more, user. If she doesn't like you, then move on. I know you can score another one.

How do you tell the difference between a girl that's just using you for attention and one that actually wants to get with you?

There's this girl I really like but I feel like she chokes off any kind of conversation I try to start with her. She's super and shy and may or may not have insecurity problems. I also feel like anything I say to her is cringy as fuck because I feel like I'm making here uncomfortable. Tell me how to get her

Not OP, but idk, try to be more playful and confident/comfortable about it, if you're not feeling awkward, there's a good chance she'll get more comfortable

Fat NEET with no skills, money, or looks
what do?

Waiting for OP to deliver to all of us

>You're here, so you obviously need it.
hey, wait a minute, you're here, too.

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it's painful how true this is. I always made everyone laugh, but the moment I asked someone out, "Eww, you're asking me out"

she starts touching you a lot

That was my initial approach. I feel awkward as fuck but I can hide it somewhat. Problem is, I can't really talk to her in person, as the only place I see her in is school. And it'll probably embarrass us both if I tried to make a conversation with her there. She can barely stammer out a yes or no when someone besides her 4 friends asks her something. More often than not she will just look at you with this half helpless half panicked face. And when I text her, she's still putting up that wall. I could give a somewhat medium sized greentext from a story that happened yesterday if it would help anyone understand what I mean.

greentext then

Idk bro, I'm not a chad like what OP claims. The only shy girl that has ever liked me, confessed to me on a piece of paper but I thought it was a joke and ignored it.

They don't work by themselves.

I've you've seen someone use a pickup line and it worked, it wasn't because of the pickup line, it was because that dude was attractive.

>yesterday P.E
>we had been doing "parkour" as a topic for quite some time
>was really just jumping over boxes
>anyway, the teacher built a parkour and we had to finish it in as little time as possible with as good a technique as we could
>boys go first, everything is fine, classmate ate shit and everybody laughed
>girls turn
>we have nothing to do so we start to bet on how long they'd take
>kinda making fun of them a bit but nothing serious
>suddenly crush starts crying
>silently so nobody really notices
>then teacher comes over to us and tells us to shut the fuck up because, as it seemed, she was stressed out by it
ohshitifuckedup.jpg
>can't talk to her now for the reasons i mentioned earlier
>decide to text her after school
skipping ahead 5 hours and one migraine
>i text her and ask if she's ok
>"yeah" ... "why"
>you cried in P.E., sorry if I was to blame for that
>"yeah it wasn't because of the laughing, i just had my five minutes"
>Really? If you say so, just know that I'm here if you want to talk
This is where I fucked up btw
>try to lighten the mood a bit by joking around about how it must be hard to be a girl in puberty
>"yeah it actually wasn't nothing i just didn't want to tell you"
>Well, you could have said so
>"yeah I'm sorry if this sounds mean but i really don't wanna talk about it with you"
>That's not a problem, just tell me i really like honesty and you don't have to apologize to me
End of convo. FML i feel like i made a fool of myself

To all the sad virgin robots here:

Don't go after a fembot. They're not as sad and miserable and alone as you. Their life is on the opposite end of the spectrum compared to yours. They draw you in and say they relate so much, but it's all lies. They have nothing in common with you. They is no such thing as a female robot.

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Didn't look that way to me; it seems like you were just curious and you handled it maturely.

I'm a 6`0 fat spic, I just want to creampie a hebe. But too autistic to talk to a slut and too brute to treat well a good lady.

Maybe you're not funny

Don't date.

By flirting with women and putting yourself out there. Ask someone out, go on dates.

You don't. But you could ask?

I wouldn't. That's her telling you she prefers to be friends.

Ask her out directly

She shows that she cares about you too and is willing to exchange compassion.

I would start by not calling women sluts.


--OP

Sorry was gone

What do guys talk about with women?
Not in a sex way, I mean what do friends even talk about?
I can't imagine having a conversation with a female.

I dunno man I always feel like I'm forcing myself on her. She already turned me down once but doesn't seem to have any hard feelings because of it. She also didn't tell me why she did, so I still think that she may just be way to introverted to answer honestly.

>Ask her out directly
Bad wording on my part. I don't know any girls that I want to be friends with but I want to do so. My current circumstances just make it hard however.

Let me save you all the effort

There's nothing you can do. Since the sexual revolution men are now judged largely on their looks. If you're not an 8/10 or 7/10 and tall then you'll be fighting for scraps and online dating will NOT work for you. Your only hope is to grow some balls and ask girls out in person and play the numbers game. No one-liners will get you a girl, it's more complicated than that (i.e. looks, height, personality)

I'm a 7 on a good day and 183 cm (6 ft). Where's my GF?

Just put a good picture on social dating media and have your height right at the top, there's your gf

i don't know either, man. I would've just said "eh I was just curious. Tell me when you want to." or something vague that might be potentially construed as something rude.

How tf should i know if a girl is into me its like the enigma or some shit like that

Is getting a gf pointless if I have a giantess fetish?

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its rough. they have less defined personalities and fewer interests than males usually. just as in sex, a woman depends on the man to lead the conversation. youll be lucky to get one or two worthwhile remarks from her.

who do the fuck you think you are, you fucking piece of shit. you pretend to be smarter then everyone from this place just because you are a shit normfag who knows how to talk with those animals called womens. you are a shit if people need advices they can google it or go to someone specialized to help them. stop pretending to be cool and smart in front of us you piece of shit cunt face

I love her and I told her that. She said that she was in a relationship and that she felt bad for telling me that.
Now she is single. Should I even try again?