I think seven years of loneliness and isolation have started to drive me insane

Btw, get help. I'm serious. I'm intj so you know I am serious. From my observations I can say that your feelings are a byproduct of browsing Jow Forums. This is what I am currently experiencing. The only way I ever won against escapism is by binge-watching motivational videos on youtube while planting self help ideas in my head to last for as long as they can. For me this method worked for one month. I was meditating, waking up early, going to bed early, eating healthy, reading and all the shit wich from my current nihilistic world view looks delusional. This is the only method that I can recommend. Write down how and what you're thinking right now and then force yourself into becoming a normie. That's my backup plan if I ever get into a situation as bad as yours is right now.

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i think you could still call it some kind of success that you have the energy to cut your fingernails user

I did that, relapsed 3 times (trying really hard btw). And instead of getting easier, it gets way harder to try it again.
>I'm not even depressed anymore, I'm full throttle apathy by now.
That's why I feel its too fucking late, like I should just accept this fate and move on.
>but enough chit-chat
I only have a few days left until my birthday so I'll see how can I become an hero now

I dont cut them, anxiety makes me eat them.
>I still take showers tho

Then stop being lonely. lol

>Spanish test
What are you a high schooler?

>studying Spanish
Who the fuck are you going to talk to?

oh sorry bro, i just recognized it because all those stupid usually basic things are so fucking hard for me, the thought of having to cut my nails again and having to shower so that people dont recognize how much of a loser i am at first sight is crippling me

I've spent the the last 10 years in isolation, on the pc all day. Now I'm engaging with some mental health workers, getting psychology and going out for a coffee with a peer support worker. I still have anxiety but it's been steadily reducing. I don't want to kill myself as much any more, but at the same time life is quite meaningless without a sense of purpose. Saying all that, I can just barely see some light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe things will work out if I continue to not isolate myself.

start with a better diet. slow progress

Bitch art and music is a great skill. I got a degree but I still cant do art and music. Your one up on me.

Same.
I'm a normie really, but I've shut myself away to the point where I'm now a fucking retard when I try to talk to anyone.

>I still havent cut my hair tho, I look like an aging 15yo.
And I feel you, its hard, I go for periods of days without getting a shower :(

even if I made a few thousand bucks from my art/music, its still a pretty fucking useless skill in the real world (no fucking employer thinks thats a good skill to have)
>when you're above 24 and people find out about your artistic side, they give you "the look"
the fucking look that screams "oh you're one of those manchild bums that waste their lives daydreaming?"
fine, I'll have chicken and vegies today.

Going to a hairdresser is literally like going to hell, its one of the worst things i could imagine and i know its pathetic but the social anxiety is strong. i went to a hairdresser 2 weeks ago and im glad i dont have to go for another atleast 4 months before i start to look like "an aging 15 yo" again. i literally only shower when i HAVE to leave the house and you probably feel the same i guess; most common but strongest symptoms of antisocial behaviour issues if i remember correctly what my therapist said, but knowing alot about it doesnt make it any better, if you havent looked up what could be wrong with you already tho

dude u basically have depression
try a healthier diet, slowly cut out refined sugar n junk, start eating healthier, vegetarian if u can or just reduce red meat in general
run everyday
meditate

I do exactly that, get my hair cut 2-3 times a year just to avoid going often. I have to prepare myself to endure that journey like a week in advance.

Hermit of thirty years, don't see myself lasting another five.
surprised I've lasted as long as i have.
I wish i wasn't so damn self aware of my own shortcomings.

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if you're still here you can ask me whatever
t. spic

its not isolation if you go to school . fuck off

>life is quite meaningless without a sense of purpose
I'd rather life be meaningless. Less pressure that way.

>seven years

step it up pleb

Yeah isolation is a gamble. You either lose your mind or you find it. Or both. I think if I was holed up in a cozy cabin in some arctic wasteland with a bunch of books I would have found it rather than lost it. IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT Jow Forums q.q

I don't even know if I am the insane or sane one anymore.
I know that may sound like cheap bullshit, but it's not too late to begin again, user. Especially if you are at in my age (26, I don't know if it was you telling you're turning 26 in June).
Agreed about mentioned user getting help. However you're confusing cause and effect imo. This mechanism is much older than 4 chan.
How it went?
>behavioral problems
>escapism/becoming hermit
>normies implement isolation
>hermit goes deeper into escapism
>addictions/finding Jow Forums/both
>hermit becomes addict/user/both

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>be me
>graduate high school
>proceed to do nothing for five years
>gradually lose my mind and end up flipping out at my parents
>they throw me out
>get put in public assistance program
>have roommates and counselor who checks on me every day
>gradually start to restore sanity until now a year later I feel pretty comfortable going outside
>still reluctant to get a job and lack the motivation to go to school

What is a peer support worker and how do you get one?
t. 5 years of isolation (26yo)

I really don't want to believe that you have to be dependent on other people to remain sane

the meme that we're social animals is unfortunately true.

People are the greatest source of happiness in this world I've found. Unfortunately they can also create a lot of pain.

I haven't spoken to anyone but my mother in 7 years.

I basically unfix my eyes and stare at the wall while listening to music and just make up scenarios in my head in which i'm hanging out with friends or family that don't exist. I try to stay away from public spaces because anyone that's nice to me or smiles at me automatically ends up in my fantasies as a friend...I think my brain tries to grasp on to any sort of human contact possible so I don't go completely insane.

I'll probably kill myself soon

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that would be a hard sell. there are studies that show loneliness is more damaging to health than smoking.

Why do I resonate so hard with this, fml

I just started doing this. what's in store for me?

Try some stoicism. It often helps.

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Eight years here famalam. No friends online or offline, only talk every now and then with parents. I don't even know anymore, I legit get burned out quickly when interacting with other anons here. Many of these anons are not even normalfags yet I can't grasp how the fuck they do it for hours, days, months. At the same time I crave connecting with someone, it's not even about talking or doing something together just feeling close to someone, anyone but at this point I'm not even sure I have the capacity left for that. On top of that I've become more psychotic, violent and paranoid. Paranoia has been with me since forever, I want someone but I can't trust anyone.

>I think my brain tries to grasp on to any sort of human contact possible so I don't go completely insane.
Scary stuff. Thankfully I'm not even close to talking with myself or talking out loud nor heavy daydreaming (ironically I used to be a heavy daydreamer as a teen) but the possibility of it happening is terrifying to say the least. Though I noticed I get attached easily to almost any regular posters I interact with that are easy ro recognize.

Is there really no hope? I mean many of us will stay like this forever, surely reaching insanity is not the only outcome, r-right? I don't want to end up literally talking to myself or a fucking doll.

>inb4 tulpa
no

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Me too user. The only time I speak to people is when I buy stuff and have to speak to the cashier. It's often weeks before I speak to another person.

Mang somewhat social organisms have a weird thing where if they feel they are inferior, they reach a state which decreases their chances of accomplishing things. When you're depressed, your IQ literally drops, you become vastly more stupid. In addition, doing things like excersizing or being productive in anything at all are basically hardwired to always boost your mood, but when you're depressed once again you're unlikely to start these things which would make you happy. You're stuck in this pit. You're at rock bottom, the only way you can go is up. Living in a modern society isn't hard, you can do it.

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It's been four years for me and I'm at my last end.

I wanna take my head off with a shotgun before the end of summer, possibly as soon as next week

dont
rob a store enjoy life lol
got full GTA

15 years for me. I just distract myself with shitposting and watching random jewtube videos. I stopped enjoying vidya around 8 years ago, which was my primary escapism. For the past 7 years I've been getting shitfaced every other day off alcohol. I can enjoy vidya when I'm wasted but I live innawoods so data is precious meaning I only play the same shit games over and over. The alcohol has caught up with me and now I'm over 300 pounds and my organs hurt (kidney area, liver area). I am looking forward for Classic WoW. I did play WoW 12+ hours a day from vanilla to wotlk. I last played on private servers in 2011 and did play 12+ hours a day so I'm hoping to do it again in Classic WoW.

>15 years
Amazi-

>For the past 7 years I've been getting shitfaced every other day off alcohol. I can enjoy vidya when I'm wasted but I live innawoods so data is precious meaning I only play the same shit games over and over. The alcohol has caught up with me and now I'm over 300 pounds and my organs hurt (kidney area, liver area).
Jesus.

Did you go through a period of intense despair or were you never really bothered by it and went down that path due to unrelated reasons? How old btw?

Based and Iogicpilled

sAME[SAME
SAMES

fuck nigger shit loneliness nigger women fuck women
i love women

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Living is so shitty it makes me wonder if anyone wasn't born an accident.

Guys, just get a puppy. You'll get love, taking walks, interact with other faggowners, and have a purpose in life. There's no need for other shitty ningens.