User, why havent you had a gf yet?

user, why aren't you drowning in a sea of gfs at any given moment?

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I'm working on it you nigger!

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Not sure, I am as generic and nice guy-ish as your typical harem protagonist

user, why aren't you wearing that pussy snorkel we got you for Christmas? We don't want you suffocating in vulvas like your older brother Chad did.

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user, why isn't every fertile female in you metropolitan area currently impregnated with your seed?

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I don't have a gf because she has one.

I-I've just been busy with work and uni and stuff

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>implying anyone would ever speak to me, or know my name

user, how come you haven't colonized all the major moons of Jupiter and Saturn using only your offspring yet?

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i dont have a girlfriend becasue i reply to these threads

I can actually picture a friend putting her ass up like this while asking me this same question to make me uncomfortable and it makes me wanna pic related

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I don't know how to have normal human relationships anymore. I am alone not just materially but in my very soul.

i do, she's just 2 dimensional

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user how come our panties aren't soaking wet from being in the same room as you? Here, SMELL THEM! What the fuck user, why don't you emanate irresistible virility out of every pore?

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Is your friend Nagatoro?

I've never read that manga, no, but this friend knows I'm a virgin robot and she'll do stuff like (well, not go that far but you get it) and do anything to make me feel terrible about. Like, she always asks in front of other friends if I'm a virgin just so I'll answer 'no' in front of them. Shit like that. I only hang out with her anymore on the hopes she'll pity fuck me or something

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reading the web novel ruined my emilia crush desu

It's about a younger girl bullying an upperclassman and calling him virgin and cross and doing lewds things to embarrass him.

Is she hot? Cocktease girls are a fetish of mine. Tell me about other times she's teased you.

fuk that gay shit i'm the girlfriend.

Because I don't want a relationship. It eats up way too much time. I have like 90 years AT BEST and it's likely way less. I don't have time to fuck around with other, weird versions of myself. They fuck around with everything, getting involved with them is just asking in trouble. Trust me, I know myself and I've seen just how alike you other humans are. I know you're nuts, it's obvious. In everything you do, insanity. You tripped so hard you made calculus.

You just spend 10 seconds on this post.

She's pretty hot, she gets hit on at work a lot too; 8/10 with makeup I guess?

>Tell me about other times she's teased you.
It's been a thing for three years but the first thing that comes to mind is when she was staying at my house. She kept her panties in a drawer and told me I could go ahead and smell them since I'm 'probably into that.' She made a long running joke about it and eventually my parents heard. She flashed the edge of her panties at me in front of my step dad toward the end of her stay and they both laughed and I wanted to die.

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>tfw CompSci sausage party
Girls don't exist from high school graduation until death.

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Yep, sounds just like the mango.

Aspergers so I never noticed the signes of girls that were into me so I never had a GF in middle or high school. In college, I decided I was going to teach English in Japan for a living so I never actively looked relationships in college as i'm the hopeless romantic type that wants a long term relationship.

I'm legitimately not into the teasing shit anymore but is it worth checking out for the comedy at least?

Did you end up going to Japan? I entertain fantasies of running away to another country and enjoy hearing from people who actually did it.

because no girls actually wanna be with me they just wanna choke me

Yeah there are some funny moments and the boy is able to bully her back a few times too, I am just impressed how perfectly ideal of a copy it is to your situation.

Anger issues and going to therapy. Dont need a gf or anyone in my life other than family

I dont know
-Toby Macguire

I'm a faggot and I want a man

Because I'm disfigured and bitter. Said things are attractive to no woman.

>Was born to bengali parents.
>pretty shit genes
>even benagli women won't date bengali men

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My body looks horrible and I'm an awful person.

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