I'm really sad and lonely. Can you guys talk to me ? ill answer any question

I get like that a lot too OP. Do you have any hobbies that keep you entertained?

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i am sure you also have something you want to see before you an hero

I'm alone as well, chilling at the park in the dark eyyy

I like to draw, watch youtube videos, read, movies, shitpost, I like animals

I dont have many friends at all and I know i am overwhelming to the few I have. I dont have family. i will have to move in 5 days and haven't found a place to stay. I would rather give away my money to my friends than pay rent. I am mentally ill and my brain is broken, I cant do basic functional things. I've tried multiple times to get help and it doesn't work.

my computer keeps overheating, so I can't

there are many things I would like to do and see, but the path to get there is far too much to bear. i have trouble even cleaning my room, how can i be successful?

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just do stupid things in front of a camera and hope you get big on youtube

I almost 86ed it last year, I'm feeling a lot better after some lifestyle changes I guess. What gets you down brotheR?

Stop thinking about the entire path and the end result so much. Just start walking the path. Just start going my man. Just GO.

it's too late for that

>I dont have many friends at all and I know i am overwhelming to the few I have. I dont have family. i will have to move in 5 days and haven't found a place to stay. I would rather give away my money to my friends than pay rent. I am mentally ill and my brain is broken, I cant do basic functional things. I've tried multiple times to get help and it doesn't work.

Drawing is cool, it gives you a way to express yourself. I paint myself and it really helped me to "see some beauty in the world" if it doesn't sound too stupid, you should definitely keep it up. Maybe you can try to sell your art online.

Maybe, if you like animals, there's a job for you in an animal shelter or something like that. Even if it's only volunteering it could keep you occupied if you have the power to get up and go there.

Y dude, yo r bored to, right? Y can go n play some games n you'll get better yo I promise ya yo

nah man, any retard can get big on youtube, like chris chan or darkside phil

I am not thinking too much about the path, i just feel as though I don't have the energy, willpower, anything to get through even the first steps.

my art is good enough to sell. I lack drive to do much of anything though.

i dont have a car and nothing is close to me that is similar to that.

You're absolutely thinking about things too much if you're stopping yourself before even starting. The first steps are the hardest, that is true, but after those it takes much less to simply keep going.

what brand of toothpaste would you recommend?

I think I have been pretty much in your mindset user. And I don't doubt I will be there again, and again. Honestly, what fucks me up the most that there are so many things I would like to experience in life that I know I will miss out.

But you know, even improving the mundanely unimportant things can make you feel better about it all. It can carry forward, and it can help you rebound whenever you are in that valley again.

So take any small thing and try to do it. If you cannot clean your room over a whole day, concentrate on decluttering your desk and put things to where you feel they should be at. Throw away stuff you don't feel you need. Or shop groceries or something else you would like to buy, ideally by actually going to a shop for it instead of ordering online. It can also help to just go out once and walk around, soul searching or so. It's most important that you do something.

I think that I totally know what you mean. I sometimes do some freelance work - not art related though - and not even money can motivate me to get up and do it which totally sucks because then I get even more stressed. Because you said you tried getting help did you mean therapy? didn't that work out at all?

Anything in particular you wanna talk about OP?

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What is your worst vice/vices?

maybe i am. I've just thought about life for a very long time. I've gone through the motions for a long time. i am a very damaged person, objectively speaking. I feel as though i am strong, but not strong enough to get from this point to a point of good+consistent self sufficiency.

i like cinnamon crest toothpaste, but I havent bought it in a long time.

I may start decluttering stuff with a different mindset. Right now, I've been cleaning and throwing things away under the assumption that i will kill myself in a few days. Getting rid of embarrassing stuff or things that wouldn't be useful to people.

I usually am motivated by people wanting art from me and being excited but that hasnt happened for a while.

>Because you said you tried getting help did you mean therapy? didn't that work out at all?

I've been stuck in mental hospital twice and have been in therapy, DBT, psychiatric appointments.

i dont believe they want to help me, because I've tried to get help full force and ended up feeling even more empty in addition to brain damaged from antipsychotics.

What freelance work do you? I've been looking for something but I cant find anything. Seriously I really need the money.

You definitely can if you work hard at it my dude. Damaged or not, you can break through and work on improving yourself. The most important part is to stop thinking about it and just start working on yourself. Stop planning every little step. Stop planning out more than a very little bit ahead. Life fucks up all your plans anyway, right? So just work on yourself in the right now.

Nothing in particular, i just wanna talk to people, answer questions.

Sloth. Strong inconsolable emotions, even if i dont have outward reactions.I am trusting and loving to a big fault. i hate to be sober, i love drugs and alcohol.

I am sober rn tho. I have some weed i might use and don't want to leave my apt to get alcohol.

I do some technical writing. Mainly stuff like instructions/guides, user's manuals for smaller companies, these things. I also sometimes fix computers and other devices for family, neighbors, etc. really stupid, but good for a quick 30 bucks from time to time.

How did you find that technical writing job? How do you start from literally nothing? What websites did you use?

maybe i should just work on myself in the right now. I do lack a lot of energy, though. i wouldn't know how or where to start

Honestly, sheer luck. I had a blog that I started in 2015. I was unemployed back then, had nothing to do and so I started writing about some stuff I thought was interesting. An editor from a website contacted me and asked me whether I wanted to write some articles for their blog and that's how it started. It took me three years though to get paid for the work. Since then, a couple of Chinese companies, that sell DIY electronic kits or something like that, have asked me to review their stuff for money or write instructions. They don't pay well, but it's usually just 15 minutes of work so it's ok. I don't really use any websites (except from gmail and paypal). But I think there are a few freelance networks where you can offer services.

Add me if you want. ringochan#6574

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Just got on PC.
My tag is yesnomaybe#2303

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>ringochan#6574
Ok, i will

feel free to add me too, if you want to: fish#2083

What should I do with my time until my job interview and I get hired. No money, no drugs, just have a car with a tank of gas and some food in the fridge.

I honestly just want to sleep for days I am so bored, lonely and broke kill me

>yesnomaybe#2303
I will add you too.

Cool! I'm still catching up reading your replies btw

mania duolingo for hours daily

go look at shelter animals

watch a movie and argue with people online about it

omegle

get high off of nutmeg or benadryl or whatever might already be in your house

mug someone

How to get high off nutmeg

>I dont have many friends at all and I know i am overwhelming to the few I have. I dont have family. i will have to move in 5 days and haven't found a place to stay. I would rather give away my money to my friends than pay rent. I am mentally ill and my brain is broken, I cant do basic functional things. I've tried multiple times to get help and it doesn't work.
Okay, that sounds awful. Try to find inner peace, that's what you always need to have with you. Try to do something you love, any kind of little hobby, to take your time away...

You eat a bunch of it

psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Myristicin

It feels nice knowing I'm not fully a lil bitch for feeling bad.

i will try to find inner peace, but it is hard when I dislike myself.

also, i should focus more on hobbies despite it being hard.