Talk bout your family toxicity

Im at the tail end of it luckily, good luck to anyone who isnt. My dad is a functioning alcoholic. Throughout my childhood he conditioned me to take responsibility things that were way beyond a child's control. When my parents started to get divorced I felt that I was souly responsible for my fathers drinking, my parents divorce, and my parents financial problems amoung a million other little things. I was being controlled through a misplaced sense of guilt.

I've gotten over most of it but it amazes me how manipulative my father was. I still have a problem feeling guilty about saying 'No' sometimes but I get over it by remembering how much I hate my dad for what he did to my mind during my most formative years.

I cut my Dad off 2 weeks ago. He was alright at first, until he met my cunt of a stepmother.

Stepmother:
>treats me like absolute dogshit
>brings up "favours" she did for me 5 years ago because she can't think of anything she's done for me in the present
>DO YOU WORK? DO YOU WORK? DO YOU WORK?
>constantly puts me down, then says my biggest problem is "putting myself down"
>will go do something "nice" just to throw it in my face when there's an argument; stopped accepting things from her
>will go weeks without talking to me, then play the victim because she's getting "ignored"
>rips on my appearance, rips on my personality "YOUR HAIR LOOKS DISGUSTING" etc.
>has called the cops on me numerous times over petty shit to the point where it's basically her go-to card now

Dad:
>molested me when I was 13. He "can't remember" which makes it okay apparently.
>defends the stepmother more than he defends his own son (me)
>makes a big deal out of anything that involves money (ex: I ask him for a loan of $10 to which I've always paid back, he'll go on a massive tirade about how I'm apparently using him and everyone walks over him)
>will play the victim every time shit goes down, even if he's the instigator of it
>spends more time drinking and smoking at the club than spending time with me (I actually had to go to the club every time just to see him)
>gave me filthy looks every time I encountered him

For some odd reason, my mother would never let me leave the house as a kid, like any time I asked her "can I go play with little Johnny fucknuggets" she'd break down and start screaming and crying. Other kids asked me to come out, but I always made some excuse, eventually people stopped asking, when I went community college I'd entirely given up on socialising with anybody. Truth be told, I didn't know how.
I know it's a bit unfair, but I still blame her that I've never a friend, never had a girlfriend, etc.

My father wasn't as bad. I remember a lot of anger, being whacked about once or twice, I think he was taking some problems and inadequacies out on me. Water under the bridge, pretty standard stuff really.

Guess I should be thankful though, some folks seemed to have it worse.

Father
>Alcoholic who'd disappear for days at a time until he left my mum when I was around 6
>Never really saw him much

Mother
>Crazy fucking woman who has a lot of issues, took them out on me. Told me to go kill myself, that I'm pale and pasty and no one will ever like me, that I'm a bitch ect the list goes on

Brother
>molested me when I was a kid like 7 up until 13 and would blackmail me to keep me quiet. When he stopped the molestation/sometimes rape he'd record me showering through the window, steal my pants, creep into my room at night and take off my covers to do god knows what

Grandmother
>was a crazy whore who liked to beat us

Hm no wonder why this is the only place I feel like I can fit in...

my father abused me and my brother in many ways for over a decade, essentially robbing me of a proper childhood. he would never think twice about his actions could literally ruin his children, so whenever he was pissed about something (no matter how menial) he would always let it out on us and my mom.
my parents tried counselling, but after the third time my dad walked out because the counselor was "attacking him" (he says that whenever someone doesn't agree with him) they finally divorced because my mom wouldnt take any of his shit any more.
he's only gotten worse after he left, mainly due to drugs. he also refuses to communicate with me, because if i wanted a relationship with him then i should act like it, even though ive tried numerous times to help him.
ended up cutting him out of my life recently, dont want to deal with such a toxic person until he gets his shit together.

My father divorced my mother when I was 6, he fucked off 10k kilometers away from when I live when I was 9, my contact is heavily limited to receiving money from him and sometimes talking to him
My mother was always a cold cunt who cared more about keeping the house clean than my feelings
My stepfather is a fucking loser who would sometimes take out his frustrations on me, not really physically though, he was a power hungry bitch giving me punishments for no reason
My grandfather is an autistic ex-alcoholic with most of his family dead, pretty depressed but keeps on hanging on
My grandmother is heavily bipolar, both loving and abusive

>have puppy
>it dies from car
>cant tell family, I'm so upset drunk and barred out 24/7
>gf helps me and tell family
>gf and I are in an 8 year relationship but we had just gotten back together from break
>I downloaded tinder in break, nothing came of it, I hate it, I was just messing with it, curious, delete it when we got back together
>when gf tells my mom the puppy is gone, my mom out of spite tells her about tinder, idk what else she embellished the story with
>gf completely blocks me, takes other dog we have and I havent been able to reach her 4 months
>family blames me for dog gone
>I resent them, I'm not apologizing, I wont speak to my mom again

I'd rather be without my family alone then near that control freak.

I miss my gf and my other dog. I was going to marry her. Now I'm almost 30 no desire to meet anybody else. Just going to keep working and running.

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>Brother molestation
Being a female must suck (too weak to defend yourself). I probably would murder him while he sleeps if I were you.

if you are almost 30 and knows your mom is a bitch, why did you brought your girlfriend to see your family? I don't know, but if someone is bad to me I either take them out of my life or fuck them twice as hard.

Because I was close with my family. I have 4 younger siblings. I knew my mom was this way. I'm not surprised she did this, I just should have been more careful. She just lost a son though whether she likes it or not. I dont want to talk to her amymore

That gf and those dogs were my whole world