>be american
>get shot
Be american
Jason Lopez
Other urls found in this thread:
npr.org
reuters.com
independent.co.uk
twitter.com
Benjamin Bennett
>be brasilian
>steal gum
>get chopped into pieces
Kayden Harris
>be japanese
>get nuked
>ruin the minds of the youth of the world
Xavier Bell
>Be australian
>Go out for a walk in your yard
>Die
Brandon Perez
>Be German
>Lose war :^)
Robert Ward
kek
Dominic Cruz
*wars
Nicholas Carter
Yes thats right thank you
John Nelson
>be irish
>starve
Brandon Cooper
>Be brit
>Conquer the world for spices
>Invent toast sandwich
Thomas Rivera
>be american
>get conquered by brits, ruled by brits
>get asshurt about taxes
>start war
>win
>start taxing people anyway
>have a war about whether or not niggers are even people
>start to deepfry butter sometime later
Benjamin Rogers
>be Mexican American
>get deported
Gavin Reed
leave my thread faggot
Aiden Jackson
>be bong
>get stabbed
Camden Mitchell
>get conquered by brits, ruled by brits
wut?
Andrew Lee
>be African
>buy other Africans
>sell to White People
>blame White People for buying
Evan Torres
>american education
Joseph Walker
In England, the schoolkids are taught that British soldiers and sailors invaded North America and enslaved the native white population.
Kevin Sanchez
>be american
>don't even know that i'm just a watered down mostly lard based englishman
fucking kek
Colton Walker
>be american
>enjoy the benefits of some of the most enlightened british thinkers of the time
>still wage war over keeping other human beings as property
>be normie
>be a faggot
Thomas Garcia
The first Americans were Brits and we won every war we fought against the British government. We were you but we told your government to go fuck itself. That's probably why you aren't allowed to have guns now.
Cooper Jones
>we won every war we fought against the British government
if you say so sweetums
Jeremiah Gray
>be Nigel
>butthurt over 1 guy
Thomas Ramirez
>Be me
>Sitting at home
>Get hungry for 4th dinner
>Ride my hover scooter down the street
>Ask police for directions to McDonald's
>Get shot
>$65000 ambulance ride
>750 pound doctor dies of a heart attack trying to fit in the door to see me
>Nurses shead tears of high fructose corn syrup
OH SAY CAN YOU SEE.....
Brayden Stewart
Leave me alone faggot
Landon Scott
Make me homu cry baby.
>be brit
>convert to Islam
Jordan Davis
STOOOOOOOOP MAKKKKEING THESE THFEADS PLLLLLEASR STOPPPPP FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK YOU FUCK YUO ASS HOLE DICK
Matthew Barnes
>2 line greentexts
Kevin Diaz
>[current year] and still defending the bong
Dylan Hill
hahaha I’m laughing at murder victims
xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Liam Robinson
>be american
>fall down stairs
>earth collapses
Charles Young
>be american
>be autistic
>drop out of social norms and regular activities by high school
>be incomprehensibly stupid despite being autistic
>start to watch anime, and discuss my interests with other people on an anonymous basket weaving forum
>begin to slowly slip out of society, deciding to completely live online
>start to do drugs, think about buying a firearm
>people at school still bully me for being a social outcast
>shoot up school
this is repeated ad nauseam across your country
>be american
>be overtly obese, completely incapable of walking
>see bong btfo his beloved country
>start to cry instead of becoming a productive member of society
>still crying to this very day
Ryder Morgan
Genuinely fucking laughed at this one
Ethan Myers
>be american
>can deflect bullets
>be bong
>no bullets to deflect
The absolute state of bongland
Evan Bell
>be american
>incredibly poorly educated
>think they can deflect bullets
>shoot up school
>oshit.jpg
Josiah Fisher
>be bong
>need a license to watch tv
>can't watch porn without a license
>I can't afford either because immigrants are taking our jobs
>government forces me to convert to Islam because of my neighbors
>forced to share my wife with Muslim neighborhood
>daughter is drug out of our car into the sharia zone
>wife leaves me for Somalian
>try to kill myself
>can't because no gun
>try to use a knife
>blunted
>bobby finds out
>arrested for attempted suicide
>punishment is death
Austin Richardson
This is exactly what you said last time.
Be more creative next time
Nolan Turner
>be bong
>ah oof my face!
Andrew Jenkins
>be prince
>marry a nigger
Eli Diaz
>be shart
>ah oof my face!
>be american
>still obsessed with race mixing
>still somehow 56%
Adam Parker
Listen, I’m all for you calling us fat ignorant thin-skinned evangelical ultra-nationalists who think social security is literally communism since that’s a funny stereotype, but it’s fucking lame to laugh at murdered innocent people.
Don’t be a prick like the rest of the Americans here who butthurtly meme about stabbings and acids.
Joshua Martin
>be american
>get stabbed because no superior knife restrictions
>McDonalds employees stick a tube inside of your wound and harvest your fat to make burgers
>become Burgre
Levi Richardson
toppest of jej`s if i do say so myself desu
Jacob Sullivan
>be brit
>conquer most of the known world
>lose it to yanks and niggers
>hundreds of years later think you're still relevant
Julian Wright
>be bong
>think you can take a truck head on
the absolute state of UK's education
Jace Davis
Heya buddy fuck y
Grayson Barnes
>be american
>cry tears of mcdonalds grease whenever someone makes fun of them online
>must eat copious amounts of fat and grease to replenish supplies
You know bones don't jiggle right?
>be britain
>colonise most of the known world
>introduce enlightenment thinking to a country of soon to be mentally retarded school shooting gun toting sharts
>be the first to abolish slavery
>literally started the industrial revolution
>also invent the television, light bulb, telephone and tanks
>fairly modest nation, not overly relevant anymore, fine with that
>be american
>only relevant feets have been causing wars and being the most likely people to shoot eachother to death
>b-but at least we're relevant, r-right?
the last thing you will be known for is getting nuked by north korea
kek
>be american
>think the sun is a planet
>think the sun orbits the earth
npr.org
Luke Gutierrez
>be Japanese
>get nuked
>get nuked again
>many years later introduce anime into the western world, cucking them back.
Joshua Jackson
Wyatt Howard
This circlejerk of Aids still going on?
Michael Barnes
>replying to a thread you don't like
Daniel Diaz
>implying that im not laughing my ass off
Colton Morris
Ryan Gutierrez
>be Bong
>get stabbed
>government bans sharp knives
Gabriel Young
Ryder Martin
>be amerimutt
>be so stupid you post in the wrong thread
>angrily get up as fast as your 300-pound body lets you
>stomp outside
>go to McDonald's to buy tendies
>get shot
>wake up in hospital
>have to pay $22 Billion for hospital expenses
>GOD BLESS AMERICA
Carson Robinson
>be american
>post the same derivative shit as some other american
>think i'm a comedy genius
Michael Morales
>be aussie
>can't read thread
Michael Sullivan
Leo Torres
>Be Mexican
>Flip off the wrong guy
>End up on bestgore the next day
Leo Rivera
>be mexican
>ACTUALLY BE MEXICAN
you just can't make this shit up
Sebastian Stewart
U wot mate?
Cameron Gray
Wyatt Rodriguez
>be russian
>drink vodka and sniff glue all day
>blame poverty on capitalists and western spies
>the only white third world country
Cooper Jenkins
What the tf
Landon King
Austin Howard
kekd
>be bong
>think 1/3 and 1/4 is statistically insignificant
Chase Nelson
>be Filipino
>smoke joint
>entire family never heard from again
Isaiah Reyes
This only makes wanna back to the comfy 1800s or early 1900s.
Lucas Nelson
Adam Thomas
but they're not and i didn't say they are
>why are amerisharts so dumb
Asher Torres
>be Englishman
>illiterate in own language
You can't make this up
independent.co.uk
Brody Jackson
Benjamin James
>be american
>lose to Tomato & Tobasco before WC
How do you feel about that?
Nolan Clark
Blake Reed
me on the left
Nathaniel Miller
>be belgian
>get raped