What's the appeal of kuudere? I'm not trying to start a fight I really want to know...

What's the appeal of kuudere? I'm not trying to start a fight I really want to know. I met a girl that pretty much described herself as kuudere, not in so many words but still. My preference is usually yandere so this is very different from the kind of girl I'm normally into, so I'm wondering, how do you get enjoyment out of it?

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It's usually dandere types who think they're super logical and/or condescending and explain being emotionally distant or extreme introversion as a normal personality trait instead of a product of repressed psychological trauma. In my experience anyway.

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Seeing slight cracks in behavior feels very rewarding. That's the dere part. If a 3D girl calls herself anything-dere she's probably lying.

Also this, dere tropes exist in fiction.

People who attempt to limit their personalities to a set of defined tropes are practically guaranteed to contradict their self-concept at least a hundred times a day. If someone describes themselves as 'kuudere' it means 'outgoing... with a twist!' to try and keep people interested. They obviously must not be the star of their own show.

If she's being genuine it means that she doesn't generally have outbursts of emotion.
I haven't met any women like this ever.

>It's usually dandere types
Do you mean people who are into kuudere or the underlying personality of a kuudere herself?
I see so it's that effort you have to put in? Do you ever break down a wall or something where she becomes actually dere?
>If a 3D girl calls herself anything-dere she's probably lying.
She didn't, we were talking about issues and she basically described herself as you would describe a kuudere, just not using the actual word. It's easier for me to simplify to kuudere for the sake of this board and I knew you guys would get it too
See above
Also
>If someone describes themselves as 'kuudere' it means 'outgoing... with a twist!'
Huh? I thought kuudere was cold and distant. Ice woman, essentially

Sorry for the confusion guys I thought it made it clear in the OP that she didnt use the term kuudere itself

That much I've been able to see, I was wondering the appeal of it tho, like guys with kuudere waifus would explain what they like about that type? Idunno I just feel like I'm missing a perspective cause I don't get it, it's the one dere type I dont really understand

Personally I think a person's silence or lack of expression usually says more and huminzes a person more than being loud and stupid like a monkey. If anyone is going to act stupid thats going to be me. To me they have a calming effect and its a perfect match for someone who is pretty volatile like myself

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>If anyone is going to act stupid thats going to be me
Kek
Your explanation makes sense I think, it's about what they do, the microexpressions and stuff that you can't really hide?

They are cute and aren't attention seeking, and they tend to be really devoted to one person in anime and pout in cute ways when they don't hey attention from the over person that matters most to them.
So they are like flowers who wilt when they aren't watered, they are delicate.

So it's sort of like they're low maintenance, to simplify it?
Your comparison seems contradicting so I want to understand better

>I met a girl that pretty much described herself as kuudere
Why would she describe herself as autistic?

You gave me an original kek friend have a (You)
Don't tell the mods about this one it'll be our little secret

My personal favorite. No bullshit, do cool stuff together, no fucking drama, no tsundere which I hate, my mom is tsundere and I hated living with her.

So they're down to earth basically?

They're low maintenance, maybe, or it's that they aren't demanding of it, so you want to give it freely.
They're like children who are afraid to ask, but you are more than won't to oblige.
It's like a Nightingale complex, maybe.
They're like injured doves, or hungry puppies.
They're the overlooked and under appreciated.

Different tastes, I think yandere is disgusting because I think jealousy translates as looking the partner as an object to own.

Heh you make it sound almost like it's a manipulation to get attention
So it's like, since they're not as demanding of it as others you feel better about giving it to them. I'm getting it now
Yeah I mean yourr not wrong but that's a big part of why I like it. But like you said, different tastes, I'm just looking to understand so that I can see the positives instead of just kinda feeling unwanted

I guess you could call it a manipulation, but calling it that would ruin the illusion, if that.
If so woman are manipulative, in a way that only benefits themselves, then the feeling goes sour.
If they seek attention from other sources other than their man, then the illusion breaks.
As with so many of these anime character types the man takes the place of the protagonist, and there woman dotes on him, and he on her.
She has eyes only for him and likewise, he for her.

>I guess you could call it a manipulation, but calling it that would ruin the illusion, if that.
Sorry I'm just trying to equate it to things that I find positive about the yandere type I guess
So I guess my next question is whether there's a point that kuuderes return the affection? It sounds like you give with very little take in return

They give back, but it's subtle.
It's like a language that only the couple understands.
He sees certain cues that indicate her true feelings, she can hide from everyone except him, he knows what she's secretly thinking and reaffirms his love for her when it's obvious to him that she needs it.

>reaffirms his love for her when it's obvious to him that she needs it
Does this ever happen reversed?
All these scenarios sound close contact and this is an LDR type situation so I think I'm boned and might have to wait it out til we meet
nobulli I know LDR risks but I'm lonely bros

But most of all, kuudere are an endless put to be filled with love.
There is no end to how much I want to hug and kiss them, they think it's inconvenient and act cold to it, but inside they are embarrassed and flustered they can't hide from me.
Kuudere make the best teddy bears.

*Endless pit

As other anons have said, it's for the cracks in the personality.
I don't really like how anime handles them, but I knew a girl who had an intensely cool aura to her, she was blunt, sarcastic, somewhat quiet, and her style was very punk
I fell in love with her cause she would laugh at my jokes and have deep conversations with me while keeping most people at a distance. I knew some girls who told me she said had a serial killer vibe but I didn't get that at all.
It's really about being attracted to the bad aspects of a person just to make the good all the sweeter, especially if the bad isn't directed at you I guess. Like how a normie girl may like when a guy is aggressive to strangers but likes to feel protected by them. But Kuudere's are less likely to be automatic assholes like those types of chads.
Fuck man thinking about it made me imagine her face for the first time in a while.

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If I had to guess I'd say the appeal is the lack of emotional bullshit to deal with that someone who is constantly assailed by things like that would like to avoid. It's one of those things where since it's rare it's exotic and attractive, although in this case it's a woman that isn't outwardly emotional.

its called having autism or aspergers. i didnt even know wtf this even is, so i googled it, and wow it just describes people who are autistic, thats it. its aspergers or autism

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