>21 year old kissles virgin
>only ever experience with a girl was when i was 13, i got forced to play spin the bottle at a party with like 50 people but i didn't want to play. I knew no one would want to kiss me and i didn't want to go through the rejection. Eventually they kept spinning it until it landed on some landwhale and they forced us to kiss but it lasted 1 sec, i hated it and don't count it as a kiss and it probably scarred me mentally for life.
>recently had to move to large city in my country for college
>Decided to move at beginning of summer and get adjusted in new city, have a fresh start, find a job and try and make a change.
>too anxious and self aware for college dorm plus or large student housing. Its my fear of being around people having sex all the time and having to face being rejected nonstop. I decided to just rent a room on the private market somewhere near my university.
>Landlord/flatmate seemed really cool, mid 30's guy, obviously mogged me but seemed like a bit of a nerd, noticed he had a sick gaming setup in the living room and a gaming pc and moues and stuff. We hit it off straight away talking about league of legends and we end up talking for hours about games and having some beers
>First few weeks were awesome, first time in my life I actually connected with someone. The guy is a IT specialist or something and just works from home all the time. He only wears jeans and sneakers but I'm pretty sure hes loaded, saw on one of his screens that he had A LOT of money in one of his crypto wallets when I walked past his screen one day.
>Hes above average looking, pretty normy tier - Pic related, something like that. He is ginger and even more pale than the guy on the picture. I thought the guy was maybe a past incel or a normie having trouble with dating, trying desperately on tinder and maybe twice a year getting some chad leftovers.
New flatmate has completely changed my opinion and views on what a chad is
>One day we are making dinner together after playing league and he says : "yeah i'm going to be having some girls over in the coming weeks"
>Tells me he has 'binges' every now and again when he is single
>Proceeds to literally fuck a new girl almost every day since about mid july up until now
>These are all girls I'd personally consider super-hot. They are not becky-instagram model tier but all minimum 7+
>he only goes for intelligent women, all of them are docters, lawyers, university professors
>At least a few of the girls he brought home were like 18-19
>he absolutally kills it on tinder, he completely shattered all my tinder conceptions
>before anyone asks, guy is 5'9
>I didn't see him much during past weeks, I've been working double shifts in a restaurant to save money and sometimes we pass at night, and usually he is with a girl in his room.
>Last week i come home after work and he is without a girl just chilling and asks if I want to drink and smoke some weed.
>Asked him a few times what his secret is, he says he is just confident
>I say that confidence is just a meme and everyone tells me to be confident
>Tells me 99% of people telling you to be confident aren't confident themselves.
>Then it actually struck me that he does have this "confident aura"
>He doesn't look like a fighter but he used to do kickboxing and was a regional champ apparently. Guy showed me old grainy VHS tapes of him knocking out a fucking 6'6 gigachad in 2003 or something
>Told me that when you know how to defend yourself as a man against other men it builds confidence.
also just to be clear :
guy never flashes money, doesnt have a car, is fucking lazy like me, plays vidya whole day and works a few hours at night. its fucking baffling me.
also : Slightly balding at the back, sometimes puts gel in his hair and shaves once every 2 weeks, that's about the height of his grooming
Yesterday he had some 19 year old smoking hot emo girl over that was just glued to whatever he was saying and he was giving her a lecture about space exploration or something. You could tell she didn't give a shit what he was talking about but she was looking at him like he was gigachad. This girl literally could have picked ANYONE. Girls usually pay me little to no attention when I am there although he does try and include me in conversation if I am there or passing and always introduces me, but im too shy and just quicky go to my room
Thinking about coming clean to him about my inceldom and hope he can help me or something. This is the first time I've ever seen this kind of success up close. I've been trying to avoid all his questions about my lovelife. He knows I havn't had any "in a very long time". He also never brags or really talks about his girls.
thanks for the blog OP. originally
Where does he get women?
Does he have a social life?
If he is introducing you maybe hes throwing u a bone, sounds like a cool guy
tinder and there is a bar round the corner from us where he goes a lot.
his social life is just a few friends that he hangs out with sometimes or has round to play games
>Yesterday he had some 19 year old smoking hot emo girl over that was just glued to whatever he was saying and he was giving her a lecture about space exploration or something.
lol i used to do that shit. i just read a lot of books in my life and recited them back to girls, they think it's deep as fuck. also makes them think you're super smart which adds a few points to your rating.
i know quite a lot of stuff but i wouldnt' even know how to start talking about it without coming off weird;(
You used a picture of BuffDudes.
So why not take up his advice and practice martial arts or something user? For four years of my life I was afraid of outside because of crack addicts, figured I was more of a target due to being attractive for some reason. Definitely if I was walking with a girl I would be, right? One more reason to not talk to them. Also, I was put on meds that made my anxiety spike so bad I couldn't even drive due to it. But now that I'm weaning off the medication and gaining speed again, I want to learn to fight and get jacked and be able to confront, at least in my mind, all these drug addicts in my city. It couldn't hurt, ne? I mean, I already realize my personality is that of a pussy's, what other logical step could I take then, if I want to improve in that regard?
you're right i think. being able to fight is never a bad skill to have and I can't imagine not getting more confident from it.
That's nice. I think you should ask him how to get girls, see if he will take you under his wing. Don't say you are an incel, just that you sometimes struggle meeting someone. Keep us updated, please.
>is rich
>only fucks girls who look like models
he is buying hookers
its his looks, you are most likely completely underrating his looks. indian men are the most confident low inhibition men on earth, you think that does them any favors?
everything you said is a whitepill for white men only , you think any of this applies if you're non-white?
Faking confidence for longer than a minute or 2 is just baffling to me, I don't think it's learnable.
it isn't learnable, people who tell you it is are just lying to you. fake it til you make it is the biggest crock of shit i can think of. it's like telling an actor that if he acts for long enough he will become the role he is playing. it's ridiculous. at best you will just get better at faking it, but its never going to become a part of you, you just know how to tap into it when you need it. that's fine, but you're going to attract women that like confident men. but... you aren't actually confident. you think she'll let it slide once she gets to know you? lol no.
Same.
I rather be myself and alone rather than pretend I'm some confident Chad. I'm okay not saying much. I just hate it when other people expect me to say something.
OP you seem smart
If you read one post in this thread:
Abandon Jow Forums and everything /incel/, (doesnt seem like you're that hung up on it anyway) and learn from this man. Let him show you how to go with the flow.
Don't try to make him into your mentor or savior. You don't need one of those. He's just another human being, like you.
Were going to need a follow up thread when you get the information user. Also it may be fucked up but you need to posta picture of your roomate
Nice lie bro. Tinder gives you like four lines to display your "confidence", either he's attractive or he doesn't get matches. If it was high school or college and he chased girls at parties then it would be a bit believable, I know several guys who used to do this.
Like I said he is slightly above average. I've shown his pic to girls on discord and they said he looked ok but nothing that made them go "omg". some did mention he looked confident, one said he looked like a guy that could protect her. But none of them described him as "hot" or said they wanted to fuck him. This was in a discord channel for pic-ratings.
i asked if i could see his tinder one day and he showed me :
his pics on tinder are him playing league with another friend behind him doing something to distract him. he has his headset on in this pic and looks super concentrated.
other pic is him in a suit at a conference giving some lecture with a slide behind him with a bunch of coding stuff on it
third pic is him in mongolia riding a horse doing eagle hunting (he does backpacking a lot and has travelled many places).
none of the pics are super good quality or really show off his best side. he doesnt even have an instagram account.
are you SURE he's not fucking hookers?
yes 100%
i'm not saying hes ever fucked a hooker or that it's not possible that maybe 1 of them the past month was a hooker. but hookers dont hang around the next day cooking you breakfast and spooning and giggling. also i know 1 of the women lives in the same apartment block and has a husband lol
There is no way this guy is not fucking hookers you fool. Tinder is perhaps the one place that confidence does not work worth a shit.
man i saw his matches, when im in my room i hear them talk, if they are hookers they are roleplaying how they met and must cost 50k a night.
My theory is that he somehow attracts high ambition powerwoman sapiophiles or something or has just the right mix of attributes : intelligence, confidence, interesting life, doesn't seem to give a fuck about anything. because all of the girls in some way have been intelligent/nerdy/confident.
it's kinda given me hope in a way. im gonna ask him tomorrow in more detail about how he was in his teens and what advice he can give me and ill report back
It is learnable though. If you can learn to have faith in your ability to adapt to any circumstance you have nothing to fear from the future and thus, will gain true confidence. That's the way I gained it. I used to believe it was all so god damn hopeless, but you know what, I started realizing, no matter what crazy shit happened to me and how many times I tried to take my own life, I was still alive. Because of that, I started to question if it really was so hopeless since I was still alive and going despite everything.
It also helps not believing in the impossible, not like there's any actual evidence that something is truly and wholely impossible anyway.
My point of view is simple. Shit will happen no matter what, the world tries to kick us down over and over, but laying down and crying will only let the kicks intensify, instead, get up and fight it anyway. Who the hell cares about tomorrow? Let fate bring it's A game, until the day I die, nothing will be enough to bring me down permanently, so what do I have to fear from failure? I'll just learn from it and get stronger, so nothing.
This is why I'm confident. Why bother sweating it so much, as long as we're alive we can always bounce back.
> him in a suit at a conference giving some lecture with a slide behind him with a bunch of coding stuff on it
Just be successful tech entrepreneur bro
>third pic is him in mongolia riding a horse doing eagle hunting ).
Just be an eagle hunter bro
This is absolute suicidefuel
>tfw you will never play lol all day and then bang qt 19 y/o emo girls
I'm about there myself. A lot of people on this board are late bloomers who are not nearly as fucked as they think. Especially the intelligent ones.
Yeah, people with personalities are attractive. This ain't news, nor is it some well kept secret. The reason why people here and on other online communities obsess over things like wealth, height, aesthetics, etc, is because they don't have personalities that are attractive and have to make themselves stand out by other means.
If you're uninteresting and devoid of a personality because you grew up glued to a screen, how do you get girls? "Well, obviously, you gotta be 6'2"+, have a six pack, full head of hair, 8 inch dick, a house, car, and six figure salary minimum!"
Of course that shit's not true, and there's no way you need all that or even any of it, but to someone who's emotional development was stunted, it gives them a reason to blame other than themselves as to why they can't get girls. It's also why advice like "Be yourself" or "Be confident" from guys who are popular is utterly useless, because they can't possibly understand what it is to be emotionally stunted.
The reason why robots can't get girls, and those that do usually result in terrible outcomes, is because at some point in their development they lost something fundamental about being human, but instead of trying to work on that, they'll instead blame a superficial cause like height or looks.
I have autism and I haven't made a friend in 20 years. It's extremely difficult to catch up in a world where every other person who is my peer in any capacity has 10x to social capital I have. There is no reason for any of them to associate with me given the opportunity cost of not spending that time on people who are more beneficial to them.
Yep, he's got a pic leading a speech comes off as rich and powerful corporate type.
Then the free spirited hunter who likes to travel is a nice counterweight to his profile pics. Making it the third after some boring pics makes it seem like he's not faking to impress.